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Amazonia (1986), originally Schiave bianche: violenza in Amazzonia, is yet another Italian cannibal/head hunter film, but this one is supposedly based on a true story, and shows no actual cannibalism, although it has plenty of gore. It has been variously known as Amazonia: The Katherine Miles Story, Captive Women VII: White Slave, Forest Slave and White Slave. IMDB's favorite is Forest Slave. It stars petite Elvire Audray as Catherine Miles, 18, and returning to her parents rubber plantation from school in London. They take a houseboat excursion to celebrate, and the parents are killed by poison darts. Catherine is only nicked, and survives the poison. Some headhunters take her parents heads as trophies, and decide to bring her with them.

The chief of the tribe auctions her off to the highest bidder. She, of course, wants no part of him, but lucks out in that she is a virgin, and there is a tribal taboo about deflowering a virgin. She is eventually broken in in a ceremony performed by women using a piece of bamboo or cane. The warrior who first captured her fights her owner to the death for the rights to her. She is attracted to him in many ways, but also repulsed as he is the one she thinks killed her parents. Later, she discovers that it wasn't Indians at all, but greedy relatives, and swears revenge.

The film starts at her trial, and we cut back and forth between the trial, and the unfolding story, which served to prevent any kind of suspense or build-up of tension. The good news it that Audray is topless through most of the film, and shows buns and bush briefly. Several native women also show all three Bs. IMDB readers say 5.3 of 10, and the only review available complained about the lack of gore. The DVD I screened is an all region one, and contains a very good 4/3 transfer, but a disappointing lack of special features for a film supposedly based on a true story. C-.

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  • Elvire Audray
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29)

  • Natives (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)


    Freakshow (1995) is a direct to vid Horror anthology, and not one of the better ones. A young couple go to a carnival freak show, and are shown 4 exhibits. In the first, a man shows up at the apartment of a former girlfriend to give her money for an abortion. Turns out she has already committed suicide, but her sister, a witch, has surprises in store for him. The only exposure in the film is breasts from Roxanne Michaels as the pregnant sister. The second tale is a werewolf story, the third about a revengeful mummy at a Halloween party, and the fourth about a man who switched bodies with a freak for lots of money.

    I don't think there was a decent performance in the entire film, the writing was weak, and there was very little fright or gore. IMDB readers have it at 5.5 of 10, which is overly generous. D+

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  • Roxanne Michaels (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Mr Skin captured Joanna Going in her latest nude appearance in Lola.

    I created a Joanna Going Volume in the Encyclopedia, so you could compare the new material to her history. While I was at it, I also created a Judith Godreche volume, simply because they happen to be next to each other in the alphabet.


    Other crap:



    Here are the latest movie reviews available at

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that I inexplicably determined there might be something of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Graphic Response
    • Annette Bening, topless and dark, but frontal nudity in scenes from the 1990 film, "The Grifters".

    Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website.

    Scorpion's Skinemax
    Colleen McDermott Breasts and bum from the late night series "Women Stories of Passion"

    Julie Parton
    (1, 2)

    All 3 B's and plenty of pseudo sex in scene from the Skinemax series, "The Best Sex Ever", episode: "The Peeping Thompsons"

    Jezebelle Bond Also from "The Peeping Thompsons" episode. More pseudo sex, but no pubes.

    Queens Jubilee Concert
    The Queen (of the English regal variety) has reigned for 50 years and there was a concert in her honour. Atomic Kitten were one of the groups performing and Jenny Snow (I think) was wearing a very, very plunging neckline. Curse the double-sided tape, but I'm sure one cameraman went home happy. Emma Bunton also looked nice.

    "Sunset Strip "
    You get the briefest of a nipple show by Anna Friel in Sunset Strip when she takes her top off in a car.

    "Catherine & Co."
    Jane Birkin spends most of Catherine and Co nude so there is plenty of topless shots, not that she has much to show.

    • Jane Birkin (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    "Nuns on the Run"
    Concluding the English section we have the enjoyable Nuns on the Run. There is a classic shower scene with girls aged 18 to 24. Plenty of boobs and buns. The only identifiable girl was Tatiana Strauss.

    • Tatiana Strauss (1, 2)
    • Unknowns (1, 2)

    "Irreconcilable Differences"
    One of Sharon Stone's earliest topless scenes was in Irreconcilable Difference. Shelley Long also looks in good form, but keeps her clothes on.

    "Mom and Dad Save the World"
    This film is rated PG so you won't see much. However only two small, clearly-visible bits of tape stop Kathy Ireland being topless. We have to be content with nice cleavage. Teri Garr also looks good for her age.

    "The Damned"
    The Damned aka La Caduta degli dei is set in Germany in the 1930s. Plenty of topless nudity by Ingrid Thulin, and possible something more in the fourth collage. Nice views of Charlotte Rampling.

    Charisma Carpenter scans
    Three scans of the former Buffy babe. The third shows a bit of see-through.

    • Charisma Carpenter (1, 2, 3)

    Other Scans
    It must be list season. One of our local magazines produced its list of the 200 sexiest women on the planet, complete with pictures.

    I've only scanned those pictures that I don't think have appeared in the Fun House.

    Josie Maran A familiar, but very lovely topless pose.

    Izabella Scorupco No nudity, but the Polish born actress (and co-star of "Vertical Limit" and "GoldenEye") looks fantastic on the pages of one of those FH-Max-Stuff magazines.

    Kate Moss The supermodel poses with breast exposure for Arena magazine. Scan by F2K

    Tasha Tilberg Brief nipple sightings, also from Arena, by F2K.

    The Funnies by Number 6
    How Our Government Works...An almost true story

    Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert.

    Congress said someone may steal from it at night; so they created a night watchman, GS-4 position and hired a person for the job.

    Then Congress said, How does the watchman do his job without instruction?" So they created a planning position and hired two (2) people, one person to write the instructions, GS-12 and one person to do time studies, GS-11.

    Then Congress said, "How will we know the night watchman is doing the tasks correctly?"

    So they created a Q. C. position and hired two (2) people, one GS-9 to do the studies and one GS-11 to write the reports.

    Then Congress said, "How are these people going to get paid?" so they created the following positions, a time keeper, GS-9, and a payroll officer, GS-11, and hired two (2) people.

    Then Congress said, "Who will be accountable for all of these people?" So they created an administrative position and hired three (3) people,an Admin. Officer GM-13, Assistant Admin. Officer GS-12, and a Legal Secretary GS-8.

    Then Congress said, "We have had this command in operation for one year and we are $18,000 over budget, we must cutback overall cost," they laid off the night watchman.

    From the Mailbag
    Hey Scoop!

    The morning crew on my local radio station (KPLX, Dallas) were blathering on about some woman who paints herself like a tiger and protests naked for PETA. Any idea if she's cute enough to look at while eating a triple meat bacon burger from Wendy's? Any pictures available?

    Scoop's Note:
    I have seen the picture, but only a very low-res version. Does anyone out there have a nice quality version?