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Wednesday
Contact junior by writing junior@scoopy.com. Contact Scoopy by writing unclescoopy@msn.com. Contact Tuna by writing tuna@scoopy.com Send submissions to scoopy@scoopy.net
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Use this search device to seek additional information from amazon.com about any of the books or movies you read about here.
To see and use all the Funhouse features, you need Netscape 6.+ or MSIE 5.+.
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| Tuna
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"Lázaro de Tormes"
Lázaro de Tormes (2000) is a tale set in the XVI century, and tells the story of a Spanish peasant, who has been accused of something, and, as a defense, tells his life story. His claim is that circumstances forced him to do whatever he did, and he is thus not guilty of a crime. He is called Lázaro from Tormes (Tormes is a river) because his mother was working at his fathers mill when he was born, literally in the river. His father was arrested for stealing flower from the customers, and exiled as a soldiers aide, where he dutifully died along with the soldier. Lázaro was then indentured to a blind man, who treated him very badly, but in turn, was constantly tricked by Lázaro in some very amusing ways. Among his tribulations were other harsh masters, a cleric who tried to bugger him, and another cleric who was so stingy that he locked up his left over food. Eventually, he hit a streak of luck. He was made town crier (a civil service job), and then encouraged to marry the maid of his benefactor, Beatriz Rico, who shows her breasts in at least three scenes. Seems his benefactor, who is a cleric, is not above using Rico for a little pleasure, but he and Lázaro agree that it doesn't really happen among themselves, and defend her good name to the rest of the world.
The film looked fantastic, with amazing costumes, great atmosphere, and great scenery. The performances were excellent. But there is far more to this work than just the film. The film was adapted by Fernando Fernán Gómez from his long running play. Unfortunately, he became ill, and José Luis García Sánchez took over the direction. I couldn't notice a difference in their work. The play is based on the book The Life of Lazarillo of Tormes which is the second most important work of Spanish literature, coming several years before Don Quixote. It is credited as being the first novel ever, and the form, known as a picaresque novel became the rage in England a couple of centuries later, with such books as Tom Jones, Moll Flaunders, and Fanny Hill. The term means episodic stories all featuring the same rogue, and comes from a Spanish word meaning rogue. For those interested in the original novel, it is available in both English and Spanish. I read through the English version, which was a huge help as there were no subtitles in this film. It really merits a US release with subtitles. The film was faithful to the spirit of the book, although it chose to jump around from present to past to future, rather than following the chronological narrative of the book. If you speak Spanish, see this. IF not, watch for a dubbed or sub-titled release. B-.
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Beatriz Rico
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"Son de mar"
son de mar (2001), or sound of the sea, is a love story directed by Bigas Luna (Jamón, jamón, Las Edades de Lulú, etc.). It is a love triangle. Martina, Leonore Watling, works in her parents bar. The richest young man in town, Sierra, Eduard Fernández, is after her in a big way, much to her parents joy, but she instantly falls for mid-semester replacement language and literature teacher Ulises, Jordi Mollŕ. She manages to get pregnant by him, forcing him, and her parents, into the marriage she wants. After the baby is born, Ulises goes fishing in his small boat, and doesn't return. His boat washes up on the ricks, and they hold a funeral. Martina sees the peril in being a single mother, and marries Sierra. True, she is not happy, but she is wealthy and comfortable -- at least until Ulises returns. He phones, and remember this guys, if you ever need a sure fire pick-up line,, and says, "I travelled every ocean of the world, only to discover that I can't live without you.
Even with subtitles, this is a very easy watch, so I will leave the rest of the plot for a surprise. IMDB readers say 6.5 of 10. Watling has numerous sex scenes in which she shows breasts and buns, and has full frontal in the surprise ending. The scenics are wonderful, and the photography is stunning, which made me appreciate the excellent Widescreen transfer. The DVD includes a making of featurette, a version of the official Web site, and several other extras. I don't know if we will see a US release, as there is male full frontal from Jordi Mollŕ, which would probably give the MPAA fits. I enjoyed this odd love story, mainly due to the scenery, including the gorgeous Watling, and some very picturesque Spanish coast. C+.
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Leonore Watling
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| Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
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Movies: There is no nudity in
Kate & Leopold - like
you were expecting some. Nothing in the deleted scenes or the director's cut,
either. It's a corny Meg Ryan romantic comedy - not as good as her best two,
but better than some of her most recent ones. It involves time-travel. I hate
that Wolverine guy. How could he look that good and also have some talent, and
also be a good guy by all accounts. We need to get rid of him somehow so women
have more reasonable expectations. Fucking guy is throwing off the curve.
Plenty of nudity in Happy
Campers - an unreleased summer camp movie from the author of "Heathers".
- James King - topless, and lookin' good. She sure looks a lot like Jaime
Pressly
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- Dominique Swain - no nudity
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Other crap:
Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded
into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that I inexplicably determined
there might be something of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or
Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.
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| Today's Big Story
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Hey Trek fans! Beleive it or not...all new vidcaps of Marina Sirtis (aka Counsellor Troi) showing some serious pokies and going TOPLESS in scenes from a totally unheard of movie called "Paradise Lost" (1999). A great find by DAI!
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| Dann
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Dann's visual review of "Monster's Ball". Excellent topless and rear nudity from Amber Rules, plus of course Halle doing the wild thing with Billy Bob.
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| Hankster
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Scoop,
Two babes for you today...First up, Shannon Tweed going topless in
"Forbidden Sins".
Then on to sexy redhead, Angie Everhart in "Sexual Predator".
- Shannon Tweed
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- Angie Everhart
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| Variety
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Kari Wuhrer
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The long time Fun House favorite looks fantastic in a recent FHM appearance (even with the arms over boobs thing). But check out the extremely silly airbrush job the magazine did in #2!
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Pam Anderson
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Teresa Cija Lourenco
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Jessica Riccardi
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Great Scans by f2k...
Pam poses almost nude in the December '01 issue of GQ.
Teresa is best known as the coffee shop girl in music video for the Lenny Kravitz song "Again". In links #1 and 2 there is breast exposure.
Model Jessica Riccardi poses with bare breast and partial bum exposure.
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Élodie Bouchez
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The French actress, who appears nude in almost all of her films, once again sheds her clothes for these topless and full frontal scenes from "Too Much Flesh" (2000).
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Mädchen Amick
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The very lovely brunette showing all 3 B's in scenes from the 1994 movie "Dream Lover". Vidcaps by Scanman.
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Lorna Pegler
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Louise Franklin
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From the UK series "Is Harry on the Boat?". Lorna looks very nice in a bikini (#1) and even better toplesss (#2). Louise bares a bit of bum in #1, and teases us with cleavage and short shorts in #2.
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| Susan Lynch |
The Irish actress gives up brief breast and bush views in a love scene with Obi-Wan in "Nora".
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Shannyn Sossamon
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See-thru nipple sightings from the "A Knight's Tale" actress in Arena magazine.
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Maria Ewing
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A star soprano in the world of opera who you may have seen on PBS as the leading actress in "Carmen" and "The Barber of Seville". Here she is doing a full frontal nude scene on stage during a performance of "Salome". 'Caps by RDO.
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| The Funnies by Number 6
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Politically Correct Names for Women & Men
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT Women and be POLITICALLY CORRECT:
She is not a BABE or a CHICK
- She is a BREASTED AMERICAN.
She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER
- She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.
She is not EASY
- She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
She does not TEASE or FLIRT
- She engages in ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION.
She has not BEEN AROUND
- She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
She does not GET YOU EXCITED
-She causes TEMPORARY BLOOD DISPLACEMENT.
She is not KINKY
- She is a CREATIVE CARETAKER.
She is not HORNY
- She is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.
She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS
- She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.
She does not NAG YOU
- She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE
She is not a SLUT
- She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.
She does not have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS
- She is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.
She is not a TWO BIT WHORE
- She is a LOW COST SERVICE PROVIDER.
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN and be POLITICALLY CORRECT:
He does not have a BEER GUT
- He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY
He is not a BAD DANCER
- He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN
He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME
- He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS
He is not BALDING
- He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION
He is not a CRADLE ROBBER
- He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS
He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK
- He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL
He does not act like a TOTAL ASS
- He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION
He does not UNDRESS YOU WITH HIS EYES
- He has an INTROSPECTIVE GRAPHIC MOMENTS
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