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"Die Legend von Paul und Paula"

Die Legend von Paul und Paula (1974) would be nothing more than a dated drama, except for where and when it was made. It is an East German film done during a brief period of artistic freedom, and one of the most popular ever in the DDR. Viewed through our eyes, it is a rather pedestrian story of a woman who kicks out her cheating husband, then falls for a neighbor who himself is in an unhappy marriage with a cheating spouse. Paula wants hi to herself, but he has a sense of duty, and worries about his son.

What made this film so daring was a theme that you should sometimes follow your heart and dare to dream. Paula was a lower class single mother who worked in a supermarket, while Paul was a petty government official. She was the dreamer, he full of the notions of work ethic, loyalty to the state, etc, that were expected of him. His wife was the daughter of a seedy carnival owner, beautiful but a complete gold digger, and promiscuous by nature. There were a few innovative moments I really enjoyed, such as the morning after Paula first sleeps with Paul. She is still in a satisfied and romantic fog, and forgets to put her work shirt on before opening the pop bottle recycling window to the usual crowd of men. In another scene, she is asked to help at the registers due to a huge rush of angry shoppers. She starts singing a dirty song, and soon the entire store in joining in.

Paula is played by Angelica Domröse, who has 43 credits at IMDB. She shows her breasts, and pokes through several of her outfits. Heidemarie Wenzel as Paul's wife also shows her breasts, and an unknown actress who is caught by Paula with her first husband also shows her breasts. IMDB rates this 6.9 of 10. IF the context interests you, I am sure you have already decided to look for it. If not, the story itself is not compelling enough to win anyone over. It is in German, with sub-titles. Based on this description, this film is a C.

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  • Angelica Domrose (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
  • Heidemarie Wenzel (1, 2, 3, 4)
  • Unknown (1, 2)

    "Guns & Lipstick"

    Guns & Lipstick (1995) has, as near as I can tell, never been released anywhere. There is a trailer on the DVD for the film with a different title (No Goodbyes), but is a direct to vid being released next week. It is a private Eye/cop/crime thriller starring Sally Kirkland as the PI. She is a former cop, down on her luck with very little business, one loyal friend still on the force, hated by the new police chief, and with a bar owner for a friend. TO complete the cliche, the bar is her hangout. Life is looking up when a stripper hires her to protect her from someone she claims wants to kill her. Kirkland is asked to stake out the inside of the strip club. Unfortunately, on the first night, someone else kills her client, and the cops blame her.

    I am not even going to try and explain the plot, as it would take 90 minutes. The thing that first struck me about this film was the number of cliches it included, including corrupt LAPD cops, a Chinese Mafia boss, a gentle Kung Fu expert with a body builder physique, kidnapping, gunfights, Australian bad guys, and even a chase scene on horseback. The crowning achievement was during this chase scene. Kirkland jumps off her horse. One of those chasing her, at full gallop, says, "Her horse is riding light. She must have jumped off." In addition to all of the familiar plot elements, there were some fascinating minor characters. My personal favorite was the women who ran a safe haven for friends of the Chinese Mafia boss. She kept them in line with a wicked looking sawed off shotgun, when she wasn't too busy feeding bread to her imaginary chickens.

    Kirkland has a nipple slip, one of the strippers (Tanya Munoz) has a lengthy scene being questioned by Kirkland where she shows breasts and buns, and several strippers in the club also show breasts and buns. So was it terrible and deritive? Derivative definitely, but I watched it to the end without fast forward, was engaged in the plot, was far too busy keeping up to look for plot holes, and cared about some of the characters at the end. So, in the final analysis, I was entertained. That is about all I ask of a thriller. C.

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  • Sally Kirkland (1, 2, 3, 4)
  • Stippers (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
  • Tanya Munoz (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)


    McCabe and Mrs Miller is Robert Altman's revisionist Western.

    I am not a great fan of this type of revisionism because it is inherently self-contradictory. If the Old West was boring, ugly, and cruel, and you want to portray it accurately and capture the feel of it, then your action must be boring, ugly and cruel, or you will defeat your own point. Altman does prove his point. This is some seriously boring stuff.  If I get my time-travel device, I'm not going to the Old West.

    Let me say in all fairness, that elements of this film are impressive, and many critics consider it an unqualified masterpiece. Roger Ebert calls it a "perfect film".

    • Assorted hookers (poor quality stuff) (1, 2)


    A couple more of Halle Berry in Monster's Ball, from Mr Skin - he did a nice job at enlarging the scenes shot through the doorway (1, 2)


    Other crap:



    Here are the latest movie reviews available at

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that I inexplicably determined there might be something of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Here is the latest poll, if you care to participate. Remember, we are asking for the most realistic movie sex scene ever, not the best nudity. The results will pop up after you vote, assuming it isn't completely fucked. If you voted yesterday before noon, please vote again. The thing zeroed out, for some reason

    Graphic Response
    • Alex Kingston, the "ER" star does full frontal nudity in scenes from "Essex Boys" (2000).

    Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website.

    Scorpion's Skinemax
    Scorpion only takes a look at one movie today, but it's a late night classic! "The Naked Detective" combines bad acting, a sleazy detective, a sleazy detective voice-over, lame attempts at comedy and LOTS of nekkid babes gettin' it on, all into one outstanding softcore package. Big stars, big boobs, almost constant nudity and/or sex. A must see for any late night cable aficionado.
    • Camille Donatacci that Fraiser is one lucky dude! But before he married Camille, she let us see all the naughty bits!

    • Taylor St Claire...the tall, busty and all natural softcore/hardcore actress shows off her big'uns and bush.

    • Julia Parton...shows us that she has something in common with her more famous cousin, Dolly. Julia also shows the other 2 b's as she gets it on.

    • Carolyn Renee Smith, shows off one of the lower B's and covers her plasti-boobs with food in a kitchen themed sex scene.

    The Realist

    You and Tuna didn't much care for "New Rose Hotel", but I think you suffered from incorrect expectations. I knew going in that it would be an Abel Ferrara movie, and I was therefore surprised to find that it was much better than his norm.

    On the other hand, his norm is exceeded once the lenscap has been removed.

    Did you notice that he did absolutely nothing either cyber or punk in this "futuristic" "cyberpunk" film. His concept of the future is to take some aerial shots of Gary, Indiana, then add a hazy amber filter to create a future that looks exactly like the past, except with orange skies.

    Oh - and Christopher Walken has a futuristic cane. Now that's imagineering.

    I've read that George Lucas will turn the Star Wars 3 film over to an outside director, as he did with 5 and 6. I nominate Abel to be his standard-bearer.

    • Asia Argento topless in "New Rose Hotel" (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Cerina Vincent
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16)

    A whole mess of topless 'caps (plus a few rear nudes as well) playing the role of Areola, the always nude foreign exchange student, in "Not Another Teen Movie".

    Claudia Black Note to TV and movie execs....someone give this sci-fi babe either more bikini screen time or get her out of those clothes all together. And hurry! You know this Aussie from "Pitch Black" and the Sci-Fi channel series "Farscape". Here she is looking fantastic in a bikini scene from "Farscape". A great collage by DAI.

    Winona Ryder Winona 'all dressed up' for the MTV movie awards. Here she is holding her own breasts, as well as letting Adam Sandler touch her boob to verify that they are real. Thanks to DAI.

    Kelly Wenham The young actress from the UK series "Where the Heart Is", caught exposing a breat in public.

    Athena King
    Brooke Roberts
    Devon Calwell
    Erin Sherwood
    Holly Weston
    Lily Kwan
    Michelle Pantoliano
    Roxanne West
    Sandrine Renard

    Full frontal nudity from The Naked News.