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"Bajarse al Moro"

Bajarse al Moro (1988), AKA Going South Shopping is a hippie era comedy set in Madrid. Chusa ,Verónica Forqué, is a fun-loving resident of Madrid, who enjoys boyfriend Antonio Banderas (a cop), and smoking weed. To supplement her income, she makes trips to Morocco and smuggles back hash in her body cavities. Young friend Elena, Aitana Sánchez-Gijón, is recruited to help, but as she is a virgin, she doesn't have the same carrying capacity. Undaunted, Chusa talks a reluctant Banderas into taking Elena's virginity. Big mistake, as the two like each other. Through in a priest next door, and some bad guys, and the film looked hilarious. Unfortunately, there were no subtitles, and, as this was based on a play, I didn't get most of the dialogue, which contained much of the humor.

It doesn't take fluency in Spanish to appreciate the extensive nudity from Aitana Sánchez-Gijón, including full-frontal. We see breasts while trying on clothes, and again in a first abortive attempt to lose her virginity, and then full frontal after sex with Banderas, in a scene which is the humorous peak of the film. She was 20 at the time this film was made, and looks amazing. Now, at age 33, she is still going strong, with 35 credits, including A Walk in the Clouds (1995) opposite Keanu Reeves. She has also served as president of the Spanish equivalent of the MPAA. I think nude film experience should be required for rating board members. The film is rated 6.4 out of 10 at IMDB. I was able to enjoy several humorous situations and some physical humor despite my very poor Spanish skills. Were there a dubbed or sub-titled version available, the score would be higher, but as it is, it is a solid genre Spanish comedy, so C+.

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  • Aitana Sanchez-Gijon
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30)


    Desafinado (2001) is a Spanish comedy made in English and featuring an International cast. IMDB calls it Off-Key a literal translation) and has it as a USA film. In point of fact, it has not been released in the US as yet. It is the story of three tenors who performed all over the world together, until a disastrous performance in Mexico City, where they split for good. Now, they are getting together at the French Villa for the wedding of one of the three to the daughter of another. To further complicate things, the bride's (Ariadna Gil) mother is married to the third trio member now. The father of the bride, who has fallen on hard times, hires a hooker to accompany him, and help with his plot to reunite the trio and start performing again. The groom to be has a son, who isn't really his, and who secretly has the hots for Gil.

    The entire film takes place at the French villa amid preparations for the wedding, and revelations about who has slept with whom and when. The cast includes Danny Aiello, George Hamilton and Joe Mantegna as the three tenors. The film was simply not my kind of humor, and I often like romantic comedies. Gil shows breasts and buns in a very dark (read bad images) scene. I was relieved to see the ending credits roll. IMDB readers say 4.5 of 10. Thus far, it has screened in Spain and Italy. I can't give this more than a C-. Technically, it was fine, but the script didn't provide enough material to make a comedy.

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  • Ariadna Gil (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)


    Lisboa is a completely conventional Spanish thriller, about equivalent to a good 1970's network TV movie of the week, except in Spanish.

    • Laia Marull. Great body. Poor image quality. (1, 2, 3, 4)


    The Legend of 1900 is a gentle allegory about the 20th century, as exemplified by an infant born in 1900 on an ocean liner. The DVD has only the short North American version, and that version has an R rating for language, but no nudity.  Shame on these people. This is a good enough film that they should have done it right and included the entire 160 minute original film. It's not a masterpiece, but is beautifully shot and scored, with moments of real screen magic, and an oddly charismatic performance by Tim Roth. (Also, there is supposed to be nudity in the longer version, which I haven't seen)


    Other crap:



    Here are the latest movie reviews available at

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that I inexplicably determined there might be something of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Ginger Hale
    (1, 2)

    Topless and rear nudity going back to 1965 in these collages from "The Notorious Daughter of Fanny Hill".

    Barbara Hershey
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    From 1972's "Boxcar Bertha"...Barbara shows plenty of breat and bum views in one of her first movie roles.

    Jennifer Tilly Topless while "Dancing at the Blue Iguana".

    Andrea Rau Topless in scenes from "Tapetenwechsel" (1984).

    Angie Dickinson Partial breast exposure with just a hint of nipple visible in the comedy/western "Sam Whiskey" (1969).

    Barbara Auer Dark topless scenes from "Der Boss aus dem Westen".

    Barbara Rudnik More toplessness from German TV in these 'caps from "Für immer jung" (1990).

    Claudia Demarmels
    (1, 2)

    Topless in bed. Scenes from "Tapetenwechsel" (1984).

    Claudia Neidig The famous topless bar maid from "National Lampoon's European Vacation".

    Claudia Stanislau Topless and full frontal nudity from "Tatort - Ein Fall für Ehrlicher" (1992).

    Julie Strain Big Julie going topless in lingerie in scenes from something called "Erotic Dreams I".

    Susan Pari
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)

    A few more 'caps of Susan topless in "Exposure" by Hankster.

    Lisa Boyle
    (1, 2)

    Bares her breasts while wearing a funky leather outfit in scenes from the Skinemax flick, "I Like To Play Games".

    Kerry Fox Breasts, bush and BJ's in 'caps from the sexually explicit movie "Intimacy" (2000).

    Pat Reeder
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    At last, Philip Michael Thomas can quit the car wash!...

    'Miami Vice' Actor Thomas Awarded $2.3 Million
    NEW YORK (Reuters) - Philip Michael Thomas, a co-star on the 1980s TV police drama "Miami Vice," was awarded $2.3 million by an arbitrator over payments for his role in telephone "psychic" commercials, direct marketer Traffix Inc. said on Wednesday.

    The award caps an eight-year dispute in which Thomas claimed he was owed over $12 million.

    Thomas portrayed Det. Ricardo Tubbs opposite actor Don Johnson on the TV show, an icon in 1980s U.S. popular culture.

    After Miami Vice's run ended in 1989, Thomson acted in Italian and German television shows and became a pitchman for a telephone psychic network, leading to the dispute over payments.

    The American Arbitration Association ordered Traffix to pay Thomas $1.48 million plus interest payments of about $785,000 due to the use of his likeness, the company said. Traffix said it was reviewing the decision and its options.

    "It is still our belief that we had previously paid Mr. Thomas all amounts that he was entitled to under our agreement with him," Traffix Chief Executive Jeffrey Schwartz said in a statement.

    The company said Thomas claimed he was owed over $12 million, based on a 1994 agreement over how his name and likeness were used on television "infomercials."

    Shares of Traffix rose 4 cents to $5.86 on the Nasdaq in Wednesday midday trading.

    And now...some actual celeb news from IMDB News. First up, a Brit tabloid (take it for what it's worth) claims that Pam has called off her marriage to Kid Rock. Seems he'd rather suck on a moonshine jug. Too bad. If they'd had a child, he could have grown up to be King of the Trailer Parks...

    Pammy And Kid Rock Call Wedding Off
    Furious Pamela Anderson has called off her wedding to lover Kid Rock because she's fed up with his drinking. The couple reportedly had a massive fight over Rock's boozing at the recent "Academy of Country Music Awards" in Los Angeles. The former Baywatch babe had been planning to marry the rap/rocker and was even showing off her engagement ring at the start of the awards show. But Pam, 34, has now ditched the ring and neither she nor Rock attended Sunday's "MTV Movie Awards" as expected. According to British newspaper The Daily Star, a pal says, "They couldn't face being seen in public. Kid has never lost his love for drinking but Pam has had enough." The pair met in March last year and announced their engagement two months ago.

    And Heather Graham insists she is not obsessed with sex, and that people who write about her just spin her words to make it sound like she's obsessed with hot, wild, steamy, sweaty, rip-your-clothes-off-and-go-crazy monkey sex...

    Heather Graham: I'm Not Obsessed With Sex
    Heather Graham admits she often comes across as sex-obsessed in interviews, but insists that's just the way journalists spin her words. The stunning Boogie Nights babe is sure she makes no more comments about nookie than any other actress when talking to the press. She says, "It's not really my fault. You do an interview with someone for two hours and you have a provocative conversation about it. The magazine wants to sell copies and sex sells magazines. So you can be talking for two hours about something else and they stick in the three quotes about sex. In every article they talk about sex. That's all they wanna know. It is really frustrating sometimes."