"Friends & Lovers"

Friends & Lovers (1999) is, I suppose, an ensemble romantic comedy. The premise seems to be that women know everything about everything, and men will do anything to get laid. This probably accounts for the chick-flick score differential of 1.5. Of course, the average is 4.0, which will give you some idea how effective the whole thing is. A group of 20 somethings, who have been friends forever, head to a ski lodge owned by one of their fathers for Christmas. The group includes a shy gay guy who is technically still a virgin, someone's pregnant sister (Suzanne Cryer), Claudia Schiffer as the date of the most testosterone driven of the bunch, Ian, the son, who has never gotten along with his dad and Alison Eastwood as the only female member of the core group.

Everyone gets laid except Stephen Baldwin, who looses Schiffer to a really irritating mobster from Jersey who is masquerading as a German ski instructor, played by Robert Downey JR. Running gags include such hilarity as the father being a total disaster in the kitchen.

Eastwood shows breast in a fairly long sex scene. Cryer shows one breast, then the other in her sex scene. Schiffer shows nothing despite being i a long sex and seduction scene. Ebert awards 1/2 star, and is rightfully brutal. Scoopy was rather kind in awarding a D. Tecnically, it is not the worst film ever made, but I can't imagine how they could have done a worse job of making a film about attractive 20 somethings having sex. D-.

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  • Alison Eastwood (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
  • Suzanne Cryer (1, 2, 3, 4)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)


    • Charlie's French Cinema Nudity Site is Updated


    9 Songs (1980):

    More of Margo Stilley in the arty hardcore porn flick directed by mainstream director Michael Winterbottom. Smaller clips again today.



    Stripes (1981):

    Most of my comments relate specifically to the new "extended cut" DVD which was released in 2005. A lot of DVDs come out every year, and fewer than 5% of them are worth owning. The extended version of Stripes, however, is one of the exceptional winners. While I am normally unenthusiastic about so-called "special editions", I found this one to be everything I could reasonably expect from a re-release of an old film. I have a variety of reasons both logical and sentimental:

    • The director has assembled 18 minutes of additional footage, fully finished and scored. That is a tremendous plus for a film which is 25 years old. You can choose to watch the new extended version with the scenes integrated seamlessly or, if you prefer, you can watch the original version as you remember it, then see the six additional scenes in the special features.
    • One of the additional scenes features significant nudity from the sexy and cute P.J. Soles in a silly, funny sex scene with Bill Murray,
    • There is a new one-hour documentary which consists of interviews with just about all the principals who are still alive. There are some great reminiscences about the crusty veteran Warren Oates and that Gargantuan lovable rogue, John Candy.
    • There is a full-length commentary by director Ivan Reitman.
    • The entire film has been re-mastered in high-definition.
    • It's a comedy classic to begin with, and brought back a lot of great memories for me.
    • The price is very reasonable.

    I haven't watched the film since it first came out, and I was pleased to find that the first 75% of it is every bit as funny as I remembered. I had mercifully forgotten that the excursion into Czechoslovakia is actually an extended action sequence, and provides neither much humor nor especially good action. In fact, the tone is actually rather dark, including scenes in which some of the platoon are tortured by the Russians. The essence of a "slobs versus snobs" comedy requires the underdogs to accomplish something unexpectedly heroic or triumphant at the end, but the process here was too drawn-out and too unfunny. After all, the film is a comedy, and the humor faucet was simply shut off for about fifteen minutes toward the end of the film.

    Fortunately, the film has the requisite "feel good" wrap-up, and ends on a funny note in the final minute or two. That and the earlier portion of the film are good enough to assure its status as a comedy classic, and one of Bill Murray's most memorable comic vehicles. I wish they still made films like this, unapologetic "guy comedies" with raunchy humor and raunchy nudity.

    • P.J. Soles (never before seen, except for the last one) (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
    • Roberta Leighton (1, 2)
    • WAC shower room (1, 2, 3, 4)
    • topless mud wrestling club (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)




    Seed of Chucky (2004):

    Been there, done that. Review here.

    The commercial unrated extended cut DVD comes out Tuesday, so here are the upgraded images. There is nothing new to announce, except a very brief and blurry possible public flash from Stephanie Chambers as she falls in the shower.

    • Stephanie Chambers (1, 2, 3, 4)




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    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    'Caps and comments by Hankster:

    Today we have a little bit of both "Babe in Bondage" and "Hankster Light".

    Yesterday we had Gladys Jimenez all tied up in "Bound by Lies", but she kept her clothes on. So I thought that it would only be fair to try again and this time have her topless. So here is Gladys in a scene from "Blowback".

    • Gladys-Jimenez in "Blowback" (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)
    • Gladys-Jimenez in "Bound By Lies" (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)

    A couple of days ago we had Melissa Brasselle in "Curse of the Komodo" and commented that this b-movie veteran just never gives it up. Here is Melissa doing a stripper scene in "Bad Bizness" and in the last couple of caps she comes really close to exposing those robo-boobs.

    • Melissa Brasselle (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

    Marion Cotillard
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)

    A new Vejiita comic featuring the lovely (and busty) French babe going topless, baring a bit of bum and even giving up a frontal view or two. Today's comic has highlights from ""Une Affaire privée", "Les Jolies choses", and "Furia".

    Chiho Terada
    (1, 2) and
    Misa Shimizu
    (1, 2)

    Both Asian beauties are topless while gettin' it on in scenes from the Japanese movie "Unagi" aka "The Eel (1997).

    Kelly Benson A bit o' toplessness in scenes from the direct-to-vid action flick, "White Tiger" (1996).

    Séverine Caneele
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    The Belgian actress bares all 3 B's and even gets up close and personal with the gyno-cam (#6) in scenes from the French movie "L'Humanité" (1999).

    Evangeline Lilly
    (1, 2)

    No skin in these, but here is the "Lost" co-star looking mighty cute while visiting Conan O'Brien last week.

    Sigourney Weaver Here's some interesting "new" nudity, and a great example of what a well produced DVD should offer. In the recently released Alien Quadrilogy boxed set, Weaver shows some see-thru toplessness in the "Alien Resurrection" extras. Apparently this was part of a screen test to test hair, make-up, costumes, etc.

    (1, 2)

    A few assorted B-bims showing off their robo-hooters in scenes from "The Crow: Salvation" (2000). This second direct-to-vid sequel starred Kirsten Dunst before she really hit it big.

    Diane Lane
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

    One of my personal all time favorites showing off her always lovely breasts in scenes from "Vital Signs" (1990). Most folks have never even heard of this flick, but oddly enough it has a cast made up of folks who have all gone on to bigger and better things. Including: Bradley Whitford ("The West Wing"), Jimmy Smits ("The West Wing", "Star Wars", "NYPD Blue"), Laura San Giacomo ("Just Shoot Me!") and Jane Adams ("Eternal Sunshine...", "Orange County")

    Pat Reeder
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    My Kidneys Are Floating - The Starkenber Beer Myth Resort in Austria's Tyrol region has seven pools filled with beer, and they say swimming in it is good for healing various skin diseases. Some guests have admitted to drinking it while swimming, but the manager said he prefers just swimming in the pool beer and getting beer to drink from the poolside bars.

  • Especially since they started attracting people with skin diseases.
  • If there was ever a pool you could be certain people have peed in...
  • I'm with him: my #1 summer rule is "Never drink amber-colored pool water."
  • This may replace Fort Lauderdale as the Spring Break capital of the world.

    Bare Minimum Tip - Knoxville, Tennessee, officials wanted to make sure strip clubs were obeying the laws, so they paid private investigator Greg Lundy $100 an hour to visit the clubs undercover. They also reimbursed his expenses, which included beer for the drink minimum, two $40 topless lap dances, and a $3 tip for one of the dancers. When challenged by local reporters, officials said it was a minimal use of taxpayer dollars and worth it because Lundy gave them an affidavit with every detail of what had happened in the adult clubs.

  • And the officials all read every word, late at night, under their covers.
  • Example: "9:14 p.m. The dancer threw a drink in my face because I tipped her $3."
  • Plus they can brag that Knoxville is now the home of the World's Greatest Job!
  • Do they need anyone to scope out the local bordellos?

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