Dr. Jekyll & Mistress Hyde (2002) is listed as a 2003 video short at IMDB. It is actually a feature length Misty Mundae film from Seduction Cinema that is a takeoff on the Jekyll and Hyde story. Julian Wells is a shrink who theorizes that women are half Madonna and half wanton, and that this conflict in their nature causes all of their psychological problems. She has developed a vaccine to merge the two, turning an unhappy woman into a total wanton. She tries it first on one of her patients, but administers too much, and the patient goes mad. She then tries a half dose on herself, and goes out to pick up a woman, Misty Mundae. On their second encounter, Mundae brings a friend, newcomer Andrea Davis. The shock ending includes a foursome of sorts with Wells' husband, her maid, Ruby LaRocca, and Mundae.

All four women show everything, and the simulated sex generates more heat than some of the Mundae Seduction Cinema efforts. The photography and lighting is rather nice, and newcomer Davis has the most amazing nipples. Look at close-up Davis 23 for a good view of them. The story is weak, and doesn't entirely make sense, but the director claims he was influenced by Mullholland Drive, which I suppose makes that ok. The DVD package includes interviews, making of footage, and a music CD of the entire score. This is another worthy entry from Seduction Cinema. C.

My Father the Hero (1994):

The film has a very cute premise. Gerard Depardieu is a divorced, absentee, neglectful dad who decides to make one more stab at a relationship with his daughter by taking her on a dream vacation to the Bahamas. Teen girls being the way they are, the daughter (Katherine Heigl) wants to be more sophisticated than she really is, so decides to impress the locals by telling them that Depardieu is her lover, a noted French criminal who rescued her from a life of crime and child prostitution. Depardieu, of course, has no idea what his daughter has been telling people, so he can't understand why he is being treated with such scorn by the locals, who think he is a criminal pederast.

The film gives Depardieu a chance to do the one thing he can do capably in English - play the clueless buffoon - and he does it quite well, generating more than a few uncomfortable laughs at Talent Night, when he sings Thank (or "Sank") Heaven for Little Girls, unaware of the extra layers of meaning added by his daughter's fabrications. Eventually, Depardieu's desire to please his daughter gets him involved in the lies as well.

The critics didn't care for it, but it's a pretty cute film, an easy enough watch when you want to turn your brain off, and the young Katherine Heigl, small-chested and slim-hipped, a 15 year old playing the part of a 14 year old, appeared absolutely adorable as the headstrong and resentful daughter, which more than compensated for her rudimentary acting ability.

The only thing really wrong with the film is that it is Disneyfied (produced by Touchstone, distributed by Buena Vista), so it didn't manage to exploit much of the humorous potential of the situation. It is therefore a satisfactory film, but one which failed to reach the potential of a truly excellent comic premise because it watered everything down to get a PG. The puritans in the USA wanted it to be watered down even more. They weren't even satisfied with this milk-and-cookies interpretation of the story, and many complained that Heigl's young body was exploited by the lurid camera work in one scene, which focused on her butt in a swimsuit which didn't cover any of her glutes at all. (This was essential for the comic premise of the scene, in which a shocked Depardieu keeps trying to cover her up.)

Is it a good enough film to make twice? I don't know. I haven't seen the French version, but there was one. It came three years earlier, and also starred Depardieu as the father, with Marie Gillain as the daughter. By all accounts, the American version is virtually the same movie, which leads one to wonder why they didn't just let Depardieu dub the French version. I think that the French version must be better for two reasons:

1. The French are much more adult and sophisticated at handling dangerously racy material like this.

2. I have to assume you can understand Depardieu when he speaks French.

Whatever their logic, it worked, because the modestly budgeted film overcame negative reviews and earned $25 million at the Box Office, thus turning a nice profit for everyone.

• Katherine Heigl. (Caps by Graphic Response, collages mine.) (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

Extra Collages from GR caps:

• Catherine Zeta-Jones in Mille et une nuits. If Zeta's official birth year is correct, she was 20 when she made this film. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
• This one is actually from Mr Skin, but it seemed to fit in the theme of "when they were young". Barbara Hershey was also 20 when she did  Last Summer.
• Helen Mirren in The Roman Spring of Mrs Stone. Helen was a bit older than 20 when she did this one. In fact, Helen was a bit older than God. She was older than Heigl, Hershey, and Zeta added together! Her body still looks great, however.
• Last, but not least, Helena Bonham Carter in Margaret's Museum. (1, 2, 3)

Updates:

• Updated volumes: Georgina Cates, Helena Bonham Carter, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Helen Mirren,

Other crap:

• Vince Gallo continues to drive his personal asshole score off the chart, He says he never apologized for his film, and everybody in showbiz hates him because he's not gay or Jewish. "If a fat pig like Roger Ebert doesn't like my movie, then I'm sorry for him", blah, blah ... In other news, President Bush offered Gallo some appointments: ambassador to Israel or Federal Circuit Court Judge, San Francisco district. For the record, the skinny movie critics hated the movie just as much as Ebert, and I'm sure if there are any straight, Gentile critics, they also hated it, unless they are French.
• here's a strange one. A guy is claiming that he had sex with Miss Vermont. Miss Vermont is an advocate of sexual abstinence for teenagers. A judge rules that he cannot make his claim public, even if it is completely true. As Jefferson and Madison always pointed out, the truth is our enemy. By the way, here's the guy's website. He's a major dillweed.
• one media company suing another media company over use of Monty Python quote. Oh, sure they knew there would be a trial, but neither of them expected some kind of Spanish Inquisition ....
• Sri Lankan official calls Norwegians a bunch of salmon-eating busybodies. Why, what an obvious falsehood. They also eat herring and cod.
• Dave Barry is running for President again
• Talk about investigative journalism at its finest. USA Today convincingly refutes a Weekly World News story about an alien infant born in Wyoming. Must have been a slow news day if they could assign a reporter to cover that.
• the Star Wars screen tests - see William Katt and Kurt Russell try out for Luke and Han, respectively. See Robbie Benson play Luke to Harrison Ford's Han.

Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

• The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
• If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
• A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
• If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

Scoop,

In yesterday's Fun House you wrote about the movie "XX/XY". The attached caps aren't DVD quality but they do show what Kathleen Robertson and Maya Stange have on show. There's topless nudity by Maya and a few pokies. Kathleen gets naked but you don't see anything, but there are a couple of upskirts.

It'll be interesting to see how much better the DVD is as I don't think the quality of the original seems to be all that high. The ménage à trois at the beginning of the movie where most of the nudity occurs was blurry and grainy, in an arty-farty sort of way.

• Kathleen Robertson (1, 2, 3)

• Maya Stange (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

Hey Scoop!

I was watching the 1971 movie "Andromeda Strain" on Turner Classic Movies last night and ran across a very rare set of images. Did you know there was a rather lengthy topless scene in the movie? Nope, neither did I. Fortunately I was taping it.

By 1971 standards, this scene of an obviously topless woman was very rare (for a mainstream sci-fi flick). I do not know who she is and the credits did not contain a listing for 'topless woman'. This scene was in the beginning of the movie as the scientists, Stone and Hall, were checking buildings in Piedmont, AZ, where the Andromeda satellite landed.

• Unknown (1, 2, 3)

CARNIE WILSON POSES FOR PLAYBOY
But Before You "Let Go," Lose 150 Pounds - Singer Carnie Wilson, who lost 150 pounds after having her stomach stapled, will appear nude in the August Playboy. She told ABC's "20/20" that it's her "redemption" and she wants to show other women that they, too, can "let go and be free." She didn't say whether any scars from her skin-tightening would show.