* Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

* White asterisk: expanded format.

* Blue asterisk: not mine.

No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.








Close Enough to Touch

Close Enough to Touch (2000) is a couples erotica of the "limited plot, long on nudity" variety. It is about two families who live next to each other in suburbia. Family one consists of single mother Toby Miller and her ripe daughter Tracy Ryan. Family two includes workaholic lawyer Bobby Johnston, his alcoholic cheating wife Monique Parent, their wannabe fashion model, nude model and bad girl Brandy Montegro and their son Jason Schnuit, who is in law school, but really wants to be an artist. Sebastien Guy is Jason's friend, and Riley Jordan is an attorney who has gone to work for Johnston.

What follows are complete spoilers.

Jason Schnuit and Tracy Ryan have been an item, but her mother doesn't approve, and he is tiring of the relationship. Brandy Montegro is screwing her current photographer. Monique Parent puts the moves on Sebastien Guy, and Bobby Johnston does Riley Jordan. In round two, Monique Parent can't get laid, Toby Miller does Bobby Johnston, Tracy Ryan fantasizes about Brandy Montegro and Jason Schnuit does Riley Jordan. In round three, Riley Jordan quits the firm and the screwing around, Bobby Johnston and Monique Parent end up alone together, Jason Schnuit trades his BMER for a Harley and heads off to play easy rider, Sebastien Guy brings out the best in Brandy Montegro and they become an item, and Toby Miller and Tracy Ryan bravely face the future looking for love.

End spoilers.

IMDb readers say 2.9, undoubtedly for the quality of the plot, which never consists of more than a few lines of dialogue followed by a lengthy sex scene. On the other hand, we have well photographed nudity and simulated sex from five identifiable women, thus easily meeting minimum genre requirements.

Therefore, this is a C- as couples erotica.

It is available only from, in a Spanish version dual region (1 and 4) with an English soundtrack and optional subtitles. Get info by clicking on the image below.


Close Enough to Touch DVD Uncut Tracy Ryan Monique Parent (2001)


Tracy Ryan


Monique Parent


Riley Jordan


Brandy Montegro


Toby Miller









Black Mama, White Mama

More time travel as the Time Machine is back in 1972 for another Pam Grier exploitation flick. We kick it off with a "Hankster Hall of Fame Babe in Bondage" scene as Alona Alegre is all tied up and getting a little electric shock treatment.


Guess who's back? It's more of Pam Grier together with Margaret Markov as they show off a little boobage.


Some topless unknowns.


And wind it up with Wendy Green topless in the prison shower scene.










Doc Holliday (Stacy Keach) buys prostitute Katie Elder (Faye Dunaway) from local bad boy Ike Clanton, and takes her to Tombstone, Arizona. He meets up with his best friend Wyatt Earp (Harris Yulin). Earp has political aspirations in the territory, and wants to control the law while Holliday would control the gambling. Elder and Holliday break up briefly, but then shack up on the edge of town, much to the chagrin of Earp's upstanding wife.

A young Clanton hand, known as the Kid, decides to be just like Holliday, gunfighting and all. Soon, a stage is held up and the Clantons are accused. Earp makes a deal with Clanton to exchange the reward money for the Kid, but Holliday bails him out instead. Earp and Holliday begin drifting apart, both over Elder and law enforcement, but become friends again in time for the climactic shootout in the infamous corral, resulting in the deaths of some major characters.


Faye Dunaway







Notes and collages

Jolie Day 5 - Hell's Kitchen + Mr. and Mrs. Smith

Angelina Jolie in Hell's Kitchen

Angelina Jolie in Mr. and Mrs. Smith










House of Love











Passion's Obsession

Part 1

Joanne Choo played a stripper in Passion's Obsession. The gal with her is Susan Hale.

And then there is CC Costigan. One of the guys she sport humps won the Australian version of Survivor several years ago.









A film clip of Irena Cara in Fame. Nice quality clip, and quite a famous nude scene, but not a very pleasant one to watch.
A film clip of Keeley Hawes in The Last September
C2000 made a film clip of Joanna Taylor in Post Impact. Collage to the right
Kitt made a film clip of Sarah Paulson in Swimmers. Collage to the right






The Comedy Wire

Comments in yellow...

Researchers at the University of British Columbia discovered that babies as young as four months old can tell when a person speaking on video switches from English to French, even with the sound off.  Infants would watch a woman's face as she read "The Little Prince" in English with the volume down.  When their attention began to wane, she would switch to French, and they'd perk up again.  They think it could be that babies recognize that the woman's mouth assumed different shapes when she switched to French.

*  Also, she put on a beret and lit up a little brown cigarette. 

The Peel Hotel in Melbourne, Australia, caters to gay men, has received a landmark ruling from civil rights officials to refuse entry to heterosexuals and lesbians.  A spokesman said gay men can be targeted by homophobes, gay men who come to their dance clubs feel like zoo animals on display when straight women show up with hen parties; and large numbers of straights and even lesbians in the place change the atmosphere and make gay customers uncomfortable.  In this case, human rights activists okayed the discrimination, saying there are plenty of other places where straight people can go. 

*  But if they feel uncomfortable when gay people show up, tough luck. 

*  Straight men and lesbians have their own place to hang out: Home Depot.

*  Is that really a big problem?  Too many straight guys demanding entry to the gay hotel? 

Thursday in Mission, Texas, an illegal Mexican immigrant was arrested on charges of selling $5 and $10 bags of marijuana to elementary school students from his ice cream truck

* But to be fair, he only did it because it increases ice cream sales

* This explains why the only flavor he carries is Cherry Garcia.