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"Obra Maestra"

Obra Maestra (2000), or Masterpiece, is a comedy staring Ariadna Gil, Santiago Segura and Pablo Carbonell. Segura and Carbonell have decided to make a film, and won't rest until famous actress and world class bitch Gil agrees to be in it. When she expresses nothing but disdain for their super 8mm effort, they kidnap her, and force her to appear. The film within the film is full of trite situations, and, to make matters worse, musical numbers.

Gil has bitch down pat, and Carbonall and Segura are believable as the inept actor and director, but most of the humor didn't work for me. This two disk special edition is one of the best DVD releases in Spain from the standpoint of transfer quality and special features. Gil shows breasts in three different scenes. IMDB readers say 6.1 of 10. The one IMDB comments gives the films plusses very succinctly.

"So, you want to make movies? Then you must see this one.

"Spanish comedians Pablo Carbonell and Santiago Segura gave an unexpected dramatic twist with this movie... pathetic wanna-be film-makers kidnap a huge star (Ariadna Gil) in order to shoot their own movie. What follows is a heart-breaking story about the distance between wishes and reality, between expectations and talent.

"It's hard not to empathize with the characters, and the movie has a few great sequences, but, somehow it is too pathetic. Anyways, I really liked this one.

"Just give it a try."

While I understand why he liked it, it is the very reason I didn't. I was expecting a comedy, got a tragedy. Still, with good technical and artistic values, a great transfer, and good performances, you might enjoy it. C+.

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  • Ariadna Gil (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

    "Cuestión de suerte"

    Cuestión de suerte (1996) ( A Matter of Luck) is a typical thriller, and could take place anywhere, and in any language. The fact that it was filmed on the Basque seacoast added some very nice scenics to a pretty good thriller. Eduardo Noriega has just lost his inheritance which he invested in a fish packing plant. He is engaged to Leire Berrocal, who is wealthy, and has been his girlfriend forever, but is not entirely certain he wants marriage. He spots a car which has run off the side of the road. He finds the driver dead, and a fortune in jewels on the seat. At this point, he makes the first unethical move of his life -- he takes the jewels and pushes the car farther down the cliff.

    He rents a room from "the french woman" (Anna Galiena), who is the most disreputable person in town, known to have been in jail, and rumored to have killed her husband. She also serves as masturbation fantasy material for all the young men in town. She soon discovers the jewels, and Galiena and Noriega end up sharing a bed, and a scheme to fence the jewels.

    Berrocal is very naked in an extended sex scene early in the film, including pubic hair. IMDB readers have this at 7.6 of 10, but based on very few votes. As a thriller, it is as good as any, and relies more on character development and plot line than action, which I find appealing. This, together with the great nudity and beautiful location, and the proper score is B-. Even if you are not a thriller fan, you might like this one.

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  • Leire Berrocal (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
  • Movies:

    Psycho III  The only one of the four Anthony Perkins Psycho movies to be directed by Perkins.

    Other crap:


    Here are the latest movie reviews available at

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that I inexplicably determined there might be something of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

  • Graphic Response
    • Halle Berry...A huge, and fantastic collage with excellent 'caps of her sex scenes in "Monster's Ball"!

    Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website.

    Excellent 'caps from the French movie "Radio de Chance" (the IMDb calls it "Ondes de choc"). Looks like a softcore skinemax flick, but with more goodies. Possibly a hard-softcore or light-hardcore. Plenty of exposure including all three B's, and lots of sex action.

    Scans of two A list babes, Angelina Jolie and Rebecca Romijn. All of Angelinas are non-nude but verrrry interesting. Rebecca's show more skin (especially #2) and the third is a see-through of sorts.
    • Angelina Jolie (1, 2, 3)
    • Rebecca Romijn-Stamos (1, 2, 3)

    Vidcaps for the day are to clean up loose ends from movies or videos capped for other reasons. From Candid Candid Camera 4 there were two uncredited but reasonably well-known babes, other than Michelle Bauer. One was 80's pornstar Crystal Breeze, aka Lisa Marie Stagno. Crystal/Lisa did some body doubling in legit movies. Included in this package are also two scans of Crystal from an artist named Yeti. Hear he has really big, really hairy feet.

    The other known babe is B-movie bim with a single name, Jasae. Both she and Crystal do triple-B performances.

    Got eight collages of other, nameless babes in this CCC4. They are two bottomless barmaids, a triple-B redhead (who claims to have posed for the German hefmag), a topless brunette who pretends to wear see-through glasses, a real nice looking brunette who pretends to be hypnotized, a topless blonde who serves as a topless dental hygenist and a perfectly nekkid blonde who looks a bit familiar... as if she might have done a movie or two.

    • Crystal Breeze, aka Lisa Marie Stagno (1, 2, 3, 4)
    • Jasae (1, 2, 3)
    • Uncredited babes (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

    From "Terminal Exposure", there are three babes:

    • Martine Castel, topless but frightened in a hot tub. The reason for her fear is a bad guy holding a gun.

    • An uncredited blonde, playing a topless photo model. Figured someone might recognize her.

    • Lisa Saxton, playing a topless photo model. She had been a frequent hefmag model. Nicely built woman. Very nicely.

    Helena Bonham Carter Topless while gettin' it on with Steve Martin in "Novocaine". Great collage by Dann.

    Rachel Griffiths Thanks to 3finger for pointing out that we were missing possibly the best image from the series of B&Ws we ran yesterday.

    Sharon Stone Classic screen nudity from Stone in "Basic Instinct".

    Sarah-Jane Potts
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Breasts, very brief bum, and possible pube sightings from the UK movie "Wonderland". American audiences may remember this UK actress from the TV show "Felicity". For those interested, I reviewed this movie, and did some 'caps back in January. Check the archives for the January 31, 2002 edition.

    Kathy Shower
    (1, 2)

    WOW! The former Hef-person gets nekkid and still looks fantastic at age 48! Vidcaps from "Love Letters: A Romantic Trilogy".

    Pat Reeder
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    Why the world hates lawyers

    >From NY Post, Page Six...

    PENTHOUSE has been hit with another lawsuit, but this time it has a better chance of winning. Last week, the magazine settled with Judith Soltesz-Benetton for an undisclosed sum after it published topless photos of her, claiming they were of tennis stunner Anna Kournikova. Now Miami lawyer Reed Stomberg has filed a class-action suit on behalf of himself and every other man who bought the issue. "The sole reason I paid the $8.99 was for the alleged Anna pictorial," Stomberg told the Miami Herald. "I bought it for a friend of mine . . . not to say I didn't take a quick peek at the pictures."

    Aa couple of items of interest....From E! Online, they're going to follow Anna Nicole around with cameras 24 hours a day. It will air on The Surgery Channel...

    BUSTING OUT: E! Networks greenlighting a weekly, half-hour reality-based series revolving around former Playboy playmate and widow Anna Nicole Smith. The Anna Nicole Smith Show will air in the 10 p.m. timeslot on a to-be-determined night.

    And it turns out British censors cut more sex from movies. Why is this not surprising?...

    British Censors Cut More Sex Scenes From Films
    LONDON (Reuters) - The number of cuts made to film and videos before being passed by British censors has risen following a relaxation in guidelines on screen sex, the industry's classification body said on Wednesday.

    The British Board of Film Classification said the number of films needing cuts had risen for the first time in years from an all time low in 2000.

    The figures showed that 2.8 percent of films in 2001 needed cuts compared to 2.3 percent in 2000, whilst the number of videos censored had increased from 2.7 percent to 3.8 percent.

    "Most of these were sex videos which showed an increase as a result of the relaxation in the guidelines following the High Court decision against the BBFC in 2000," BBFC director Robin Duval said in a statement.

    The High Court had ruled that the BBFC could not ban the sale of seven explicit pornographic movies with titles such as "Nympho Nurse Nancy" and "Horny Catbabe."

    It prompted the BBFC to announce a more liberal attitude to film sex, allowing real sex scenes in 'R18' (films restricted for sale in sex shops) and passing explicit mainstream films such as "Baise-Moi," although that had some scenes censored.

    "The 'R18' category only accounted for just over six percent of all works classified by the BBFC," Duval said. "Of the 14 cinema films cut, the majority were to obtain a lower category. Only one 18-rated film, "Baise-Moi," was cut in 2001."