Endless Night (1971) is based on an Agatha Christie story, and was hyped as a great mystery. They boasted that only 4 in 100 would figure it out, and admonished everyone who saw it not to reveal the ending to their friends. I won't even attempt to explain why some people seems to have liked this film. I read all available reviews and comments, and still have no idea what they saw in it. Basically, a shiftless chauffeur wants to build his dream home on a piece of land he has found, ad has even become friends with a famous architect who wants to build it. Unfortunately he can barely afford the film to take pictures of the land. Then he meets, weds and beds Hayley Mills, the "6th richest woman in the world." The very Bondlike house gets built, complete with remote control moving floors and walls. The only fly in the ointment is Mills' best friend Greta, played by Britt Ekland.

I will honor the film makers wishes and not reveal the ending. I will give you one important tip if you decide to become one of the 4 percent that figures it out. Play close attention to the people we don't quite see Hywel Bennett meet. The entire film is boring intentional misdirection to set up the shocking conclusion, which, while rather surprising to most people, just doesn't fit and is not very entertaining.

Ekland shows breasts and buns. IMDb readers have this at 5.8 of 10. I have no idea at all where the title came from, as it doesn't seem to relate to the plot. The house is kind of nifty, and Moog Synth music adds to the time capsule value of the 60s. This is clearly a C-, enjoyable enough for some genre fans.

Mascara (1999):

Atrociously bad movie that Tuna and I reviewed some time back. Nice nudity, however, from Ione Skye, the beautiful daughter of that famous mellow-yellow hippy-dippy, Donovan! So here are a couple of zipped .wmv files.

• Skye (1, 2)

Basic Instinct (1992):

Sharon Stone got all the publicity when Basic Instinct came out, and the great scene between Michael Douglas and Jeanne Tripplehorn got lost in the shuffle. It never draws any support in any of our polls, but I'd have to say it is one of the 25 hottest sex scenes in the history of mainstream cinema. I love the expression on Tripplehorn's face in the last frame. Either she's a terrific actress, or Douglas gave her a very big surprise.

• Tripplehorn zipped .wmv

Other Crap:

• Pulp Fiction Legos
• Where did those car logos come from?
• Star Wars: Episode III - Easter Egg Hunt
• The journal of unnecessary research presents: "Students tend to drink much more alcohol than they think." ... and other useless scientific studies.
• It's a virtual three-way tie for the top of the Friday Box Office, but The Longest Yard seems to be an upset winner!
• The greatest superhero of them all: Divertor
• JoBlo's obscure Movie Trivia.
• Feds shut down a network that leaked 'Star Wars'
• The Manhole Covers of Japan . Beautiful, but disappointingly octopi-free
• Here's a very naughty cigarette ad you would never have seen in America, even when those ads were legal.
• Astronomy Pic o' the Day: the Himalayas photographed from the space station.
• Oliver Stone was arrested on suspicion of DUI and possession of a controlled substance
• USA TODAY summarizes the big finales of the TV season
• Urban Legends Reference Pages: Radio announcer Harry von Zell once referred to President Herbert Hoover on a live broadcast as 'Hoobert Heever.' Status: True, but the widely believed version is NOT accurate.
• 10 Minutes of the new Batman flick
• Sith Ties Record for Fastest to $200M (It is already the #1 movie of the year, after eight days!)

Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the links above, since it's sorta in real time.

Click here to submit a URL for Other Crap

MOVIE REVIEWS:

Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

• The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
• If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
• A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
• If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

.Email Scoopy Jr. if suggestions for future polls.

Here are the results of our previous polls:
The Top 20 Nude Scenes of 2004
The Best Nude Film Debuts of the 80s
The Best Nude Film Debuts of the 90s
Which actress has been the most convincing playing a stripper.
Who has the best bum in Hollywood?
Best All Time Television Comedy
Best Nudity in an Oscar-winning performance
The Top 20 Best Straight Sex Scenes
Best Lesbian Love Scenes

Today is an all "Hankster Light" day.

We did the "Babe in Bondage" from "Darkwolf" a few days ago, so today we have not one, but two topless babes from the same movie.

So enjoy the sights of Katie Lohmann working her way around a topless bar, and Sasha Williams (nice set) posing for a photographer.

• Katie Lohmann (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Sasha Williams (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)

"The Last Don" parts I and II (1997-1998)
Two-part miniseries based on the novel by The Godfather author Mario Puzo. Both parts available separately on DVD but it's part II which has the real nudity.

• Lynley Swain: breasts and butt as blonde bimbo in threesome.
• Genevieve Russo (who is really model Tania Lamanna): robohooters as brunette bimbo in threesome.
• Monica Talma: breasts as bimbette.
• Alyson Court: mega cleavage and gigglecam as b-movie starlet.
• Daryl Hannah: pokies and discreet nude in hottub.
• Penelope Ann Miller: sexy as dancer.
• Michelle Burke: brassiere, cleavage.
• Kirstie Alley: double chin cleavage.
• Patsy Kensit: filling out here blouse quite nicely.
• Sarah Stavrou: cleavage.
• stripper: partial breast in part I.
• dancers: skimpy costumes in part I.
• unknown: pokies in part I.

"Interstate 60: Episodes of The Road"
No nudity in Interstate 60: Episodes of The Road but former 'Pink Ranger' Amy Jo Johnson shows a lovely pair of legs as well as lifting her top.

• Amy Jo Johnson

"Tom Horn"
Linda Evans has not done much nudity on screen and some brief see-through nipple exposure through her wet top in Tom Horn is all I've seen.

• Linda Evans

"Safe"
Some pokies by one of the sexiest women on screen when we have Julianne Moore in Safe.

• Julianne Moore (1, 2)

"King Ralph"
John Goodman is King Ralph, a mediocre movie in which he is named king of England. No visible nudity but a bit of thong and pastie action by stripper called Adele Lakeland and lots of cleavage by Camille Coduri.

• Adele Lakeland
• Camille Coduri (1, 2)

"The Lone Ranger"
A bit of bum crack by Anita Brown in The Lone Ranger.

• Anita Brown

"The In-laws"
Emmy Laybourne flashes her knickers in The In-laws and there are some minor pokies by Lindsay Sloane when she is deluged.

• Emmy Laybourne
• Lindsay Sloane

"The Flamingo Kid"
No nudity in The Flamingo Kid, just sexy images of Janet Jones and Jessica Walter.

• Janet Jones (1, 2)
• Jessica Walter (best known as Lucille Bluth from the FOX series ""Arrested Development").

"The House on Carroll Street"
Some breast exposure by Kelly McGillis in The House on Carroll Street.

• Kelly McGillis (1, 2)

"View from the Top"
It's all upskirts and cleavage in View from the Top by Kelly Preston, Christina Applegate and Gwyneth Paltrow.

• Kelly Preston (1, 2)
• Christina Applegate (1, 2, 3, 4)
• Gwyneth Paltrow (1, 2, 3, 4)

"Den of Lions"
Some nice breast exposure by Zita Görög in Den of Lions, with some additional cleavage by Tania Emery.

• Zita Görög (1, 2,
• Tania Emery (1, 2)

"Alex and Emma"
It's pokies and an upskirt by Sophie Marceau in Alex and Emma.

• Sophie Marceau (1, 2, 3)

"Crash Dive"
Lightweight but fun 1997 actioner is set on a nuclear submarine on patrol. They come across the victims of a boating disaster and rescue them. Unfortunately, the victims are not really victims, but terrorists intent on hijacking the sub, and they don't mind killing people in the process.

Michael Dudikoff plays the sub's designer, who is asked by the navy to help find and rescue the boat and it's crew.

Lots of action, some predictable lameness, and a nude scene by Elena DeBurdo, who plays one of the rescued. Her job is to seduce a sailor so that the bad guys can take over the boat. She does her job.

• Elena DeBurdo

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