Sunday

Tuna
"Stripteaser"

Stripteaser (1995) is another Roger Corman New Concord strip-sploitation film. Based on the first two, I see a trend. Here are the probable rules for the genre so far.

1) There must be strippers
2) There must be a killer
3) There are few locations and few extras
4) The must be a high body count
5) You must have Maria Ford and Nikki Fritz topless
6) There should be another naked person, in this case newcomer Ann-Marie Holman, who does full frontal.

This is a much easier film to watch than Strip to Kill. The entire film takes place in Zippers Clown Palace strip club, where guess which three naked women work. A man pretending to be blind arrives after last call, and takes over the place at gunpoint, then terrorizes everyone there, including making a timid stuttering customer fuck Maria Ford, and getting a bottomless strip from Holman, who is girlfriend to a very butch Nikki Fritz. Seems this guy has been stalking Ford. Meanwhile, two rather seedy cops are making their way slowly but surely to the Clown Palace, and you know things will get bloody.

IMDB readers have this at 3.5 of 10, but Joe Bob thinks much more highly of it, and does a hilarious comparison between it at Striptease. Rick Dean as the mental case was very convincingly evil. Unfortunately, the transfer was very grainy and had lots of motion blur, indicating that it was not shot with a fast enough camera and film. This one is worth a look, if stripper's in peril stories appeal to you.

  • Thumbnails
  • Thumbnails
  • Thumbnails
  • Thumbnails
  • Thumbnails

  • Ann-Marie Holman (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14)
  • Maria Ford (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21)
  • Nikki Fritz (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    The best job ever:

    Yesterday, I read Pat Reeder's comments about the Charlie's Angels director getting naked with all the angels. Pat suggested that McG must have the best job ever.

    Maybe so, but I'd like to nominate Jorge Sanz, assuming he's heterosexual. In the movie I reviewed yesterday, Belle Epoque, he had sex scenes with Ariadna Gil, Penelope Cruz, Maribel Verdu, and a fourth babe-a-licious woman all in the same film. Now that's tough duty.

     

     

    Upcoming nudity:

    Reports from Tribeca and Cannes

    • The Brown Bunny - Vincent Gallo's reportedly awful film features Chloe Sevigny smoking the sausage on camera, so it can't be ALL bad.
    • Young Adam - Obi Wan whips out his light saber, as usual, joined in a saucy sex scene by Emily Mortimer. Literally saucy. He smears her with sauce and custard.
    • Dogville - Nicole Kidman is raped repeatedly, but observers report that there is no nudity
    • Levelland - Marie Brown is seen nekkid underwater.
    • Love Object - Melissa Sagemiller brings out one breast in a bondage scene.
    • Speaking of Sex - Melora Walters and Lara Flynn Boyle do topless scenes.

    Other crap:


    Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Brainscan
    'Caps and comments by Brainscan:

    The movie: "Babe Watch: Forbidden Parody" aka "Bikini Academy" (1996)

    The bottom line: the movie really, really blew. Both the cinematography and the transfer to DVD reached new lows. Probably the first time I've looked at a movie with a half-dozen nekkid babes, with enough material to make 20 collages and absolutely loathed the cinematic effort from top to bottom.

    This movie wouldn't be worth watching if Pammy and Traci and all the Baywatch babes had gotten all nekkid and done one another.

    • Ashlie Rhey, topless. (1, 2, 3, 4)

    • Julie Reay, in a bikini.

    • Kelly Hoffman, revealing her robo-boobs all but #5...that one has the thong views. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    • Patcharee Clark, another bikini with a thong view.

    • Raelynn Saalman, toplessness. (1, 2, 3, 4)

    • Shannon Hall, thong.

    • Tane McClure, a thong in #3, robo-boobs in the rest. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Spaz
    'Caps and comments by Spaz:

    "Dangerous Prey" (1995)

    An earlier Simandl direct-to-video with Shannon Whirry in a very hot love scene near the beginning but it's downhill from there. DVD only available from Hong Kong and it's not a good transfer.


    BONUS Nudity:

    Simandl babe Klara Hlousek in yet another lesbian threesome in "Lethal Target".

    Mr. Nude Celeb
    Gwyneth Paltrow
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Topless in the multi-Oscar winning movie "Shakespeare in Love" (1998).

    Tiffany Shepis
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

    A far, far cry from Oscar....here is the Troma regular topless and full frontal in several scenes from "Bloody Murder 2: Closing Camp" (2003).

    PAL
    Joey Lauren Adams The "Chasing Amy" star showing a bit of nipple in the 1994 movie "S.F.W.".

    Renata Dancewicz
    (1, 2)

    The Polish actress shows all 3 B's in very slear full frontal and dorsal scenes from "Devilish Education" (1995).

    Mercedes Cecchetto
    (1, 2)

    Very nice, all natural big'uns and full frontal views in scenes from "Une grande fille comme toi" aka "A Big Girl Like You" (2003).

    Michelle Johnson She's of course best known for baring all in her debut film "Blame It on Rio" (1984). Here she is a few years later, showing just a little bit of breast exposure in scenes from "Genuine Risk" (1990).