The Delinquents (1989)
From about 1987 to 1992, Australian Kylie
Minogue was about the hottest figure on the pop charts of several
countries. She had her greatest successes in Australia, New Zealand,
Japan, and the UK, but she also had some hits in North American and
Europe. For an incredibly detailed account of her successes, you can
go to her IMDb
bio and look under the rubric of "trivia." The Delinquents was a
movie specifically tailored for her, to showcase her looks and
abilities and to initiate her movie career. (She had starred in
Australian soap operas before she made it big as a singer.)
I started out to write that it is a
coming-of-age story about Australian teens in the 50s, but that isn't
quite right. It isn't really a personal story from a single P.O.V, as
one would expect in a coming-of-age tale, but rather a manufactured
soap opera of a love story which happens to focus on two very young
teens. They are two good kids from troubled working-class homes who
find each other, take refuge in each other, and form a lifelong bond.
They just want to be left alone to start their life together, and
they're willing to do whatever is necessary to pay the bills.
Unfortunately, their families and the legal authorities don't see
their situation in quite the same light since the kids are only 15
years old, and the girl gets pregnant. Society conspires constantly to
punish them for simply wanting to be together. Their struggle is
filled with heartbreak, and their road to adulthood is blocked by many
detours. There are, as you might expect, many references to Romeo and
Juliet in the script, but this version of the classic tale does
eventually progress to a feel-good multi-hankie ending.
The film was targeted directly at Kylie's
audience(s): the young teens and tweens who bought her music, and the
women of all ages who followed her soap opera career. The Delinquents
is firmly into chick-flick territory with a 1.8 point male/female
differential at IMDb (6.6 from females, 4.8 from males), and within
the female group, the enthusiasm declines as the voters get older.
All of that is not to say that it is a bad
film. In fact, it has some very strong positives. Here are four:
1. The photography is gorgeous. The
cinematographer was Andrew Lesnie, who is absolutely one of the best
on the planet. He's been the cinematographer for a few little films
you may have heard of, like King Kong and the three Lord of the Rings
films! He was won every award that a cinematographer can win,
including an Oscar.
2. The soundtrack is great if you like vintage
1950s do-wop rock (I do!). There are several recordings by the
original artists and even a Kylie Minogue cover of Tears on my Pillow.
In addition to the familiar rock 'n roll standards, there is a lush
and romantic original orchestral score by Miles Goodman.
3. The period details are fun to absorb. In
many ways, small-town Australia in the 1950s was like the equivalent
life in the USA. In other ways, it was very different. I was
fascinated by the sight of dozens of hard-nosed blue collar guys
riding their bikes to work en masse. In another scene, I thought I had
pegged the familiar sight of streetcar tracks running through the town
- until a full-fledged steam locomotive came barreling through
downtown pulling a full load of freight through the High Street. I
have never seen anything like that in North America - or anywhere
else, for that matter. It is only through films like this that an
American may share such unique memories of a forgotten time in a
4. Kylie herself did a surprisingly good job
in the role, looked great, and even did a brief topless scene.
The DVD is Region 4 PAL, but is available
through an American importer. It includes a very nice widescreen
anamorphic transfer of the film and a couple of "making of"
featurettes which feature the actors, the director, and the composer.
I found it a solid DVD of a very watchable
girly movie. Click on the pic below for info from the American
The importer also sells DVD players which can play
films from every region. Click below for info.
The Garden (1977)
Israeli movie. "An old man tends his garden under the threat of
encroaching urbanization. In wanders a beautiful tourist, dazed
and naked after a sexual assault, and he mistakes her for an
angel." I haven't seen it, and it looks awful, but I'm definitely
down for seeing a 19 year old Melanie Griffith do a full-frontal
nude scene! (Zipped
A recent Entertainment
Weekly article got us to thinking about how a
more analytical approach could be applied to
"The worst movie sequel
of all time"
Before you click, make the call: real or
Iraq loves Lionel Richie
Lost actress Michelle
Rodriguez headed back to jail again
Dita von Teese in "L'uomo
Playboy's "Women of My
Sen. John Kerry is on the
fence on the fence.
Urban Legends Reference
Pages: Do the five characters in Scooby-Doo
represent five Eastern colleges?
temporarily slashes gas price to 29 cents
Madonna crucifies herself
- The tough part is
driving the nails into the second hand.
Albino spokesman says
DaVinci is the 68th movie since 1960 to
feature an evil albino,
placing albinos in the axis of movie evil with
twins and dwarves.
- The great thing
about evil albinos is their versatility.
While evil twins are almost always real
characters in a film and evil dwarves are
almost always found in symbolic or dream
sequences, albinos can switch hit! They are
the Mickey Mantle of evil movie characters.
Sarah Silverman discusses
her movie, her charity endevors and making the
top 100 hottest people in America by some
This Week in Unnecessary
Censorship: May 19th, 2006
Paul McCartney Mourns
Loss of Handicapped Parking Sticker
FilmJerk.com - The Early
Report for May 22
Man arrested for calling
NETWORK MERGING WITH THE WEATHER CHANNEL
- “Using the vast
resources of The Weather Channel, including
the Doppler 8000, and my personal forecasts
as told to me by God, we’ll have
unprecedented accuracy on where storms will
hit, and which sections of the nation with
the most sinners will suffer tremendously”
FOR SEEING DA VINCI CODE
... Critics decry hypocrisy after record
opening of film in Vatican City
L.A. SEX CRIMES DOWN 90%
DURING CANNES FILM FEST
- LAPD reports sharp
drop in child pornography, prostitute
killing as film executives, agents head to
DEAN REASSURES DEMOCRATS:
"WE WILL FIND A WAY TO SCREW THIS UP"
- At a top-level
summit called “Defeat: 2006,” the DNC chief
expressed his determination to uphold the
Democrat's losing tradition.
President George W. Bush
said today that the Guantanamo facility should
remain open but that the United Nations should
Weekly World News: "SPAM
... Prize committee honors poetic power of
David Spade and Heather
Locklear have split
- Wow. If such an
ideal couple can't even make it a few weeks,
what chance is there for any of us in this
Final "X-Men" has lost
Richard Kelly's Southland
Tales turns out to be a monumental stinker
Last night's Desperate
Housewives is now online in its entirety.
Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format.
Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.
Carrer Bed (1972)
Career Bed is a grindhouse classic featuring two future porn superstars,
Jennifer Wells and Georgina Spelvin. Honey Hunter is the stage mother from
hell, bringing daughter Jennifer Wells to the Big Apple to become a movie
star. She plans to trade her daughter's virginity for a film contract, and is
not above using her own body whenever and wherever it will help. Jennifer was
more than cute enough to land lesbian agent Georgina Spelvin, and eventually
attracted a man rich and powerful enough to put her in movies. That is when
Jennifer proved that she had some moves of her own.
There is no score at IMDb. By 1972, it was the beginning of the end for
this sort of movie. Hard core 8 mm loops were widely available by then, and
Deep Throat came out in 1972. As you know, hard core is what killed
exploitation and 70s style soft core films. There is a certain attitude in
this film that was only found in the East Coast soft core. For example, when
Honey Hunter has sex with Jennifer's boyfriend so Jennifer will catch and dump
him, you see him humping away from behind while she smokes a cigarette with a
bored look on her face. As far as story, acting and technical merit, there is
nearly none. However, it is a snapshot of a long gone era, an early look at
two porn superstars, and a real boobfest.
Compared to other films in its class, it is the valedictorian, hence a C+.
“Wu Ji” a.k.a. “The Promise” is
a 2005 action/fantasy Hong Kong film directed by Chen Kaige. I’d say it belongs
in the “crouching tiger hidden dragon” genre. They seem to have developed a
formula for this kind of thing: A love story, colorful costumes, exotic
locations, sword battles done Matrix-style, heroes jumping up trees and houses,
and some magic: throw them all in the mix and see what the result is.
This time it is so-so. The
characters look a bit naïve, the story is ok but unfolds too slowly, the battle
scenes could be better and some of the CG special effects look very cheap. On
the other hand, the main actors are good-looking, the atmosphere is dreamy and
there are some tragedy elements that make you care for the hero’s plight. All in
all not a bad film, but after having watched it, I don’t think I’ll go back to
There is essentially no nudity.
Pat's comments in yellow...
Despite lousy reviews and church leaders urging
a boycott, "The DaVinci Code" made $224 million worldwide, the
second-biggest debut weekend after the last "Star Wars" sequel.
* Some called it an abomination that slandered their most sacred idol ... but
enough about the "Star Wars" sequels.
Two-thirds of Saudi women are too fat under their
robes, but any attempts to encourage them to exercise, even letting them
walk in public, are being stymied by Islamic fundamentalists. One even
wrote a pamphlet opposing efforts to allow girls' P.E. classes in schools.
It claims that disrobing outside the home is immoral and might make girls
lose their shyness, and if the girls see each other in tight leotards, they
might become attracted to each other.
* Just wondering: how does anyone KNOW how fat they are under their robes?
Kirstie Alley, who ballooned to
over 300 pounds before becoming a Jenny Craig spokeswoman, says her goal is
to appear on her pal Oprah Winfrey's show this November in a bikini. But
she says she still has another 20 pounds to lose to reach her target
* ... 280.
* Three things I never want to hear in the same sentence: "Kirstie Alley,"
"Oprah" and "bikini."