Charlie's French Cinema Nudity site is updated


Illicit Behavior (1992)

This film is also known as Criminal Intent

If I tell you that this is a non-theatrical erotic thriller starring Kent McCord and Robert Davi, you can probably figure out immediately that it is not likely to be confused with Branagh's Henry V. It's about what you would expect from the description. An out-of-control cop is being investigated by Internal Affairs. The Internal Affairs guy ends up having an internal affair of his own with the cop's smokin'-hot wife (Joan Severance). The results ain't pretty.

For the record, here are the positives and negatives, as I see them:

In the plus column:

1. The plot of this film is actually pretty good. The first half progresses predictably based upon the premise I described above, but the film then starts to go off in some crazy directions, and we find out that almost nothing has been what it seemed to be. Several surprises follow in rapid-fire order, and the various intrigues and misunderstandings result in more corpses than the final scene of Hamlet. Although I have seen my share of films, I did not expect many of the surprises, and I did not find them to be excessively contrived or illogical, so the storyline was sort of fun in an over-the-top way.

2. Joan Severance looks beautiful in this film and showed some skin here and there.

3. The film is finally on DVD, 13 years after it went to video.

In the minus column:

1. The erotica is sub-par. The nudity basically consists of fleeting glimpses of isolated body parts in dark sex scenes. The actual sex scenes don't generate much electricity, as you might guess from the identity of the male leads.

2. The DVD transfer is uninspired. The colors are faded and there's a lot of motion blur. It is available in Region 2 only, PAL format only.

So, based upon your expectations for a straight-to-video erotic thriller, you'll probably find it to be a more interesting thriller than you might expect, but also far less erotic.


Joan Severance



The DVD is Region 2, PAL, from The Netherlands. Clicking on the image below will take you to the American importer.

Illicit Behavior DVD Joan Severance (1992)


Other Crap:

An extended clip from The Devil Wears Prada

The trailer for Loverboy, a drama directed by Kevin Bacon and written by Shakespeare (HANNAH Shakespeare)

  • "A neglected daughter becomes a possessive mother in an emotional journey into the heart and mind of a woman who loved too much."

Paris Hilton's ex says: Lindsay Lohan's pussy "smells like diarrhea"

Remember disqualified Little Leaguer Danny Almonte? He just married a 30 year old woman.

The best strip club cities? #1 - Las Vegas, of course, but I betcha can't guess number two.

Colbert on the hot new jet-set vacation spot: Libya

  • "Now we realize Qaddafi is just a loveable eccentric, kinda like Prince."

Colbert's new segment on "The Difference-Makers." Today: the men who guard our borders

  • These brave volunteers are building a rinky-dink fence for a few yards between Mexico and California.

Colbert guards the purity of our nation's female prom-goers.

You knew Colbert would eventually weigh in on those bears that attacked the monkey in the Amsterdam Zoo.

"Jon interviews the incomparable Willie Nelson about Willie's new book 'The Tao of Willie.'"

The Daily Show looks at plagiarism

The Daily Show looks for Jimmy Hoffa

Jon Stewart- special origin edition -The Origin of the Decider!

  • While trying to execute a mentally challenged prisoner, the Decider is born!


Arkansas Mayor Accused in Sex-For-Water Case ... sexual exploitation from government officials - it's an Arkanas tradition!

"Police arrested a man after he tried to sell a valuable Rembrandt etching at a bar in Broken Arrow, Oklahoma."

  • Well, no wonder he got caught. The art police always have their eyes on Broken Arrow. I sell all my stolen Rembrandts at the Cracker Barrel restaurant out in Lampasas, Texas
  • And a tip for you youngsters. Fern bars are OK for stolen Rembrandts, but stolen Van Goghs command the highest price if you take them to honky-tonks.

Letterman's "Top Ten Signs Your Monkey Is A Genius"

Jo Blo's pics from Cannes!!

National Guard short of help ... will have to fill border guard positions with illegal immigrants.

Transcript of President's Live Address to the Nation to Unveil Bold New Ideas on that Immigration Reform Stuff (WHITEHOUSE.ORG)

Estimate the value of your domain name

  • Interesting concept, but doesn't seem accurate

"And the Emmy hosting gig goes to...the redhead with the Bob's Big Boy pompadour"

And you think the LAPD sucks? Check out the Baltimore police ... "Couple Arrested For Asking For Directions"

  • They were arrested for trespassing - on a public street - and spent eight hours in jail!
  • And, on top of that, their car was burglarized in the police impound lot.

The trailer for Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause

  • How could the series get any gosh-darn better? Two words: Martin Short

Various new clips for Pulse

  • "Imagine our wireless technologies made a connection to a world beyond our own. Imagine that world used that technology as a doorway into ours. Now, imagine the connection we made can't be shut down. When you turn on your cell phone or log on to your e-mail, they'll get in, you'll be infected and they'll be able to take from you what they don't have anymore - life. Kristen Bell ("Veronica Mars"), Christina Milian ("Love Don't Cost A Thing") and Ian Somerhalder ("Lost") star in "Pulse," a bone-chilling thriller hitting theatres on July 14th."
  • Yeah, my bones are already feelin' a tad chilly.

9 new clips from "X-Men: The Last Stand" (Follow the links to "trailer")

New footage from Sups Returns

The trailer for Step Up

  • "Everyone deserves a chance to follow their dreams, but some people only get one shot. Tyler Gage (Channing Tatum) is a rebel from the wrong side of Baltimore's tracks, and the only thing that stands between him and an unfulfilled life are his dreams of one day making it out of there. Nora (Jenna Dewan) is a privileged ballet dancer attending Baltimore's ultra-elite Maryland School of the Arts -- and the only thing standing in the way of her obviously brilliant future is finding a great dance partner for her senior showcase. When trouble with the law lands Tyler with a community service gig at Maryland School of the Arts, he arrives as an angry outsider, until his skills as a gifted street dancer draw Nora's attention. Now, as sparks fly between them, both on and off stage, Tyler realizes he has just one performance to prove that he can step up to a life far larger than he ever imagined. Featuring the directorial debut of leading choreographer Anne Fletcher, the film also stars R&B superstar Mario, Drew Sidora as well as rap legend Heavy D, Damaine Radcliff, De'Shawn Washington and Academy Award nominee and Golden Globe winner Rachel Griffiths."

Two trailers and a "making of" for Paris, Je T'Aime

The New York Times charged a panel of experts to answer this question: What Is the Best Work of American Fiction of the Last 25 Years?

"It's rare that an actress who shows real talent benefits from showing skin"


Movie Reviews:

Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Motor Home Massacre (2005)

This is a straight to video slasher movie in which seven friends make off with an aging motor home and head to the woods, where someone with night vision goggles is using a machete to play a Benihana Boogie on campers. Since there were only eight people in the cast and seven of them were the campers, I correctly guessed the killer to be the other one. The only dramatic tension was wondering who would be sliced and diced next. That game was so much fun, people kept coming back to life so they could be hacked up again.

It is not that I am against 80s style slasher films, but this one needed to show at least 7 more breasts, should have had at least one swimming or shower scene, and needed sympathetic characters. None of the characters have any appeal. They are either obnoxious (a white gangsta and an alpha male asshole), or whiny wimps. Even the main premise, that these seven were friends, was hard to accept, because none of them seemed to like each other. Of course, that may have been an impression created by the universally poor acting. The film also has technical negatives. Most of the photography is entirely too dark and grainy, and the sound is bad enough that a lot of the dialogue is hard to hear.

Now that I think about it, the fact that you can't see or hear the film is probably a positive rather than a negative.

IMDb has this at 6.2. {Cough} Clearly, the cast voted, as there are 7 tens. Once my vote is counted, there will also be 7 ones. This is an F.

Neither of these women has any other credits at IMDb. Given their after-market body parts, I am guessing that they are either clothing removal specialists, or have appeared using other names. 

Diane Picallo

Nicole Crisp









We're kicking off today with Zoe Paul in "Frost: Portrait of a Vampire." Breasts from Zoe with the final scenes being dead in a bathtub.

Then it's off to the "House of the Dead".

Erica Parker topless in the water.

Penny Plang shaking the boobies.

Sonya Salomaa sexy in a short skirt and topless.




Dann reports on Odyssey 5:

Odyssey 5, Showtime's 2002 Sci-Fi series, was one of my favorites. I was bummed when they cancelled it, and even more bummed because I missed the last couple of episodes, so I didn't know how it ended.

I was pretty excited about the release of "the complete series", as the 5-disc DVD was billed, because I thought I'd finally know the ending. Fat chance! Turns out it didn't end. Well, actually, it DID end, but on a cliff hanger, so they obviously didn't know it was going to be cancelled. Bummer. Strange, too, since this was allegedly Showtime's second highest rated series. Thanks a lot, folks.

Anyway, the 19 episodes are still great stories, about the crew of a space shuttle that witnesses the destruction of earth. They are rescued by an alien called the Seeker, who is able to send their spirits (but not their bodies) back 5 years in time, to try and discover why the earth imploded, and save it. Just imagine suddenly being in your body 5 years ago, but knowing what you know now.

Great show, just too bad they didn't end the damned thing. Incidentally, the collage has the names of all the actresses, taken from different episodes, and it's not a misprint; Katia Corriveau did appear in two separate episodes.

various women






Presidential niece Lauren Bush with a bit peeking out from beneath.
Marisa Tomei in public
Christina Ricci caught in a bikini
Penelope Cruz in Don't Move

Pat's comments in yellow...

Wisconsin's Supreme Court reversed a lower court and ruled that Milwaukee police did not violate a suspect's constitutional right against unreasonable searches when they gave him a laxative called "Go Lightly" to retrieve a bag of heroin he had swallowed.  His attorney called it "a tragic defeat for human rights."

* What a load of crap...


Last night, NBC aired the last episode of "Will & Grace," the sitcom about a handsome, wealthy gay man and his scatter-brained platonic surrogate wife

* If you really miss it, try watching the media coverage of Tom and Katie.