This is the TV show with the topless scene from  21 year old Catherine Zeta-Jones.

Whoa! Since Jimmy the Saint loaded the entire show to Rapidshare, I actually watched it straight through. It's a truly sappy, underdeveloped 24 minutes of TV melodrama.

A wealthy widowed dad welcomes his university-age daughter and three of her friends to his French country estate during her semester break. Dad and daughter obviously have a great relationship, and dad also establishes a good rapport with his daughter's friend (Zeta) and the boyfriends of the two girls. They all visit for a while, then the two young couples head for the Mediterranean in their two separate cars, and dad falls asleep.

Dad awakens to the sound of sobbing in his bedroom. It is Zeta, reporting that the man's daughter has died in an automobile accident. Since the daughter and her boyfriend have been fried to a crisp, and since Zeta's boyfriend is taking care of the details with the police, the dad does what I think any of us would have done on this somber occasion - he fucks the living daylights out of Zeta-Jones.

Yessssssssssssss! Now THAT'S the way to mourn.

The next morning he wants more of that young stuff, but Zeta tells him that their carnal love is over. From now on she will be his new daughter, and love him in a different way! The film ends with a group hug between dad, Zeta, and Zeta's boyfriend, who looks mighty uncomfortable about the entire thing as the credits roll.

This show would be long forgotten if not for the topless scene from a young Zeta. Oh, what am I talking about? It IS long forgotten. It's not even in Zeta's IMDb filmography! As far as we know, Jimmy the Saint's home video tape is the only footprint left by this show upon human existence.

The collage and film clip just didn't come out good, but I did them anyway because the show is so rare.

Catherine Zeta Jones

I reduced the film clip to 360x270 in order to sharpen it a bit. Jimmy's tape of the entire show is preserved in 720x544 (see yesterday's edition for the downloading instructions).


* Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

* White asterisk: expanded format.

* Blue asterisk: not mine.

No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.







My Tale is Hot

My Tale is Hot (1964) is a nudie cutie produced by Dan Sonney and directed by Peter Perry. Lucifer (Manny Goodtimes) is being harassed by his wife Ima Goul because he has not been doing well in the corruption department. He swears than he can corrupt the man named as most faithful husband by Ladies House Companion, vaudevillian Little Jack Little, in less than 24 hours. Jack seems to be entirely faithful to his wife, Bea Reddy, even when tempted by dozens of naked women. This film is non-stop breasts and buns, rarely inconvenienced by plot. Satan tries every trick he can think of using nubile naked women, but is unable to tempt him. Then we learn the reason why. Little Jack Little is a sheik, and has a harem of 365 wives. He is on his honeymoon with number 365.

This is vintage period erotica, and is not in very good shape. Nearly every frame is scratched, and there are also missing chips and obvious splices.  In spite of the technical problems, this is a must own for fans of early strippers and early T&A because of a rare film appearance from legendary stripper Candy Barr, who was caught very few times on film. She show her legendary breasts and sweet face here, in an obvious insert from a loop of her strip act. Another insert appears in the special features, this time with no pasties.

This film is a C.  Since the DVD also includes My Name is Jezebel, it is an entertainment bargain for fans of vintage period erotica. Others will probably find enough unintentional laughs to make it worth the rental.

IMDb readers say 6.1 based on 13 votes, undoubtedly including the person who submitted all of the mistakes on this Something Weird Video double feature.


Candy Barr



Bea Reddy












The Whole Nine Yards

I just love this movie.


Natasha Henstridge no nudity, just one sexy lady.

Rosanna Arquette with some cleavage.

Probably this is why I like this flick so much, Amanda Peet and her classic topless scene.








Into the Night


Ed Orkin (Jeff Goldblum) is an ordinary guy with insomnia who has a very boring job and finds out his wife is having an affair.

Following a friend's advice, he heads to the airport where his life takes a sharp turn when he rescues a lovely, but mysterious blonde named Diana (Michelle Pfeiffer) from some ruthlessly zany thugs at the airport. From this point onwards Ed and Diana are caught up in a cheerfully dashing and murderous chase throughout the night in Los Angeles.


Michelle Pfeiffer


Sue Bowser


Peggy McIntaggart







Notes and collages

The War Zone

Aisling O'Sullivan








Gun Shy



Sandra Bullock







When the Party's Over


The only nudity in When the Party's Over (1992) is a brief view of Rae Dawn Chong's butt.


There's cleavage, such as there is, by Sandra Bullock


and Elizabeth Berridge is down to her underwear.



The Fog


It's a similar situation in The Fog (2005). There is a brief butt-shot of somebody in a shower...

it is supposed to be Maggie Grace.

Selma Blair is in her underwear.





No nudity but Deborah Kara Unger

and Elisabeth Shue are shown half dressed in Leo (2002).



The Island of Dr. Moreau


There's topless nudity in The Island of Dr. Moreau (1977) by Barbara Carrera but nothing interesting can be seen. A higher quality source might reveal more.



Elmer Gantry


Shirley Jones has only done nudity in a couple of movies and Elmer Gantry (1960) is not one of them. She plays a prostitute and is found in various stages of undress.





Some pokies by Christine Adams in Submerged (2005)

and a topless computer-generated woman.



Earthly Possessions


A brief upskirt by Susan Sarandon in Earthly Possessions (1999).





Blindman (1971) is an above-average spaghetti western about a blind man who has 50 mail-order brides stolen from him. Plenty of boobs and bums by the women as they are given a wash.

We also see these topless:

Marisa Solinas

Agneta Eckemyr

Magda Konopka.



Almost Peaceful


Some nice nudity in Almost Peaceful aka Un Monde presque paisible (2002).

Judith D'Aleazzo is topless

and there's some bush by Clotilde Courau.



The Wolf


Full frontal nudity by Mélanie Doutey in The Wolf aka El Lobo (2004).

(Film clip)



The House of Sand


More full nudity in The House of Sand aka Casa de Areia (2006) by Fernanda Torres.

(Film clip)



An Italian Romance


Some brief topless exposure by Maya Sansa in An Italian Romance aka L'Amore ritrovato (2004).

(Film clip)







"Roméo et Juliette" (2006)


Modern French-Canadian adaption of Romeo and Juliet.


Nudity by newcomers Charlotte Aubin

and Adele Gigantes

with veteran Johanne Fontaine (ugh) as a nude model.



"La peau blanche" aka "White Skin"


French-Canadian horror about succubi. Released under the Americanized DVD title Cannibal which is an entirely different horror genre.


Marianne Farley shows partial boob,

Jessica Malka is topless,

and Isabelle Guerard is shown in brassiere.



Jeff Ltd. season II: episode The Model Man


Ashley Wolstat shows a lot of cleavage

and Jodi McFadden does some high kicks.



"To Have and to Hold" (2006/I) (TV)


Jessica Lowndes shows some PG-rated partial nudity during the opening credits in this movie which aired on the Lifetime Network.



"Xchange" (2000)


As reported earlier in the Funhouse a few weeks ago, the R-rated version available on the U.S. DVD is missing a rough sex scene involving Janet Kidder. The uncut unrated version has aired on U.S. cable and is also available on the region 2 DVD in the U.K.


Faith Thrue in I Jomfruens Tegn (film clip)