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"Nine 1/2 Weeks"

Nine 1/2 Weeks (1986) - I am sure every one of you is familiar with this Micky Rourke, Kim Bassinger erotica written and produced by Zalman King. This was one of my first DVD capture projects, and was badly in need of an upgrade. For those who have forgotten, the hottest scene has the two having abandoned sex between two buildings with the rain pouring on them. I was able to improve on my earlier effort, but I have to say this DVD does not do the film justice. It is a indifferent letterbox mastered from what is obviously a well-worn and grainy distribution print, complete with dirt specs and chips. SOmeone needs to get King, Rourke and Basinger together for a commentary, and do an anamorphic remaster from good source material.

The IMDB score of 5.2 of 10 is not a bad IMDB score for pure erotica. The film was nominated for 3 Razzies. While it lacks pace, it does provide several highly erotic scenes and some good exposure from Kim. THe characters could have been fleshed out more in my opinion. C+.

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  • Kim Basinger (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26)

    "Last Tango in Paris"

    Last Tango in Paris (1972) was one of my first VHS projects, and I produced exactly one image at the time. This film saw Brando nominated for an Oscar and a Golden Globe. Most critics consider it a masterpiece. Ebert, for instance, gives a full four stars. IMDB readers say 6.9 of 10. It is hard for me to understand why this film is great, and 9 1'2 Weeks isn't. Both are pure erotica. It is true that Brando cared about this role, and did a great job. But the plot is paper thin. A man has an affair with a young girl, Maria Schneider, to ease the pain of his wife's suicide. In the best known scene of the film, Brando shows us that butter is good on every kind of buns. Schneider shows everything several time sin the film, including a bath scene.

    When this was released, it looked as though honest portrayal of sexuality was on its way into mainstream film. What a shame that Hollywood couldn't build on this start. It was easy to understand Brando's motivation -- comfort, and escape from the reality of his wife's death -- but I am not sure I understand Schneider's. At any rate, this is a film that you should see, even if erotica is not your genre. B-.

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  • Maria Schneider (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)


    The only major DVD release Tuesday was Oceans 11. No nudity.


    Charlie's French Cinema Nudity Site is updated

    The following encyclopedia volumes are updated: Asia Argento, Maria Conchita Alonso, Jenny Agutter, Michelle Bauer, Elodie Bouchez, Penelope Cruz, Helena Bonham Carter, Joely Richardson, Susan Sarandon, Greta Scacchi, Samantha Morton

    Other crap:

    It's ok, mom, dad, go on to Europe. I don't mind staying by myself. IMDb reports:

    Former child star Macaulay Culkin is in the midst of a wild spending spree - on hordes and hordes of strippers. The 21-year-old Home Alone actor shelled out a cool $2,000 on topless dancers and booze at New York's Privilege club on May 2nd. A fellow reveller recalls, "He had over 20 lap dances from different girls." Culkin, who is currently filming Party Monster, in which he plays a club promoter and convicted murderer, entered the strip joint at 11.30pm and didn't emerge into the outside world until 3.30am the following morning. In addition to treating himself to almost two dozen dirty dances at $20 a pop, Culkin and a handful of friends gulped down a few $350 bottles of Perrier-jouet champagne. Culkin's spokeswoman claims he drank only beer and was there "researching New York's wild life for his role". But the club's manager counters, "There was lots of champagne, and there was no way he was researching anything except the figures of the girls - he was having the time of his life."

    And the good news is:

    Unfaithful, just released in theaters Friday, is a Diane Lane sex-fest. It is directed by Adrian Lyne, whose "9 1/2 Weeks" you can find in Tuna's column today . Lyne has made great movies (Jacob's Ladder), big box office popcorn pictures (Fatal Attraction),  and stinkers (Indecent Proposal) in his career, and he has always been in the middle of controversy (9 1/2 Weeks,  Fatal Attraction, Lolita). In fact, Lyne's greatest talent is creating movies that people talk about. Even his lamest efforts, like Indecent Proposal and Flashdance, have generated considerable dialogue. He just has a knack for making "the film that everyone is talking about". I like that. I miss the days when people would come out of a film and engage in a discussion about its ideas. He only makes one every 3-4 years, having made only four films in the past 14 years. It has been five years between Unfaithful and Lolita. Unfaithful is a remake of Claude Chabrol's la Femme Infidele. I haven't seen that film or this one, but Chabrol is kind of the French equivalent of Hitchcock, so you can bet there will be guilt and scheming

    Here is what some critics said about the sex scenes:

    "Some of the love scenes in Unfaithful definitely push the R rating and watching Lane and Martinez consummating their affair in the bedroom, hallway and even the stall of a public bathroom steam up the glasses and even made me squirm in my seat at times."

    "Adrian Lyne's "Unfaithful" comes close to being a genuine hothouse sex film for mature audiences"

    Unfortunately, although the sex is hot, the nudity is on a milder level. Here is the summary from screenit (Connie is the character played by Diane Lane)

  • We see several views of Connie's bare breasts (along with bare upper thighs) as she reclines in a bubble bath. She then finds Paul's drawing he made on her thigh and tries to scrub it off when Edward enters, disrobes (we don't see anything but his bare chest) and gets into the tub with her (sitting across from her). He kisses her knees and apparently runs his hand up toward her crotch (under the water), but she then acts like she's cold and gets out (and we briefly see her bare butt).
  • Connie and Paul meet in the bathroom at a restaurant and passionately kiss. He pulls down her dress and gropes her breast and they awkwardly move into one of the stalls. We then see their heads above the top of the stall indicating they're having sex (with some movement and sounds). We then see a close-up of them having sex while standing (from a side view we see her bare butt up against the wall as he thrusts against her while her legs are around him).
  • Paul undresses Connie and we see the side of her bare butt as he does so. He then takes off her bra and puts his hands on her bare breasts from behind her. The two passionately kiss, but the scene ends there.
  • After Connie is upset with Paul for seeing other woman, he forces himself on her, kissing her and removing her top (she doesn't resist long and then goes along with it). He then proceeds to pull down her pants and removes his shirt. There's heavy breathing as she undoes his pants while they stand in the hallway outside of his place. He then pulls down her panties from behind her and she suggestively asks, "Are you going to f*ck me?" As he then has sex from behind her as she's bent over (the camera view is from in front of her), she says, "I want you to f*ck me." During this, we see movement and hear related sexual sounds.

    Here are the latest movie reviews available at

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that I inexplicably determined there might be something of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.


    A little more of Dawn Dunlap all tied up in "Barbarian Queen". Then something a little different, a couple of mornings ago Jane Leeves (Frasier) was on the "Today Show" and they showed clips of her in "Cabaret". No nudity of course , but she looked pretty sexy to me.

    • Dawn Dunlap, tied up and topless (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    • Jane Leeves, on stage in lingerie (1, 2)

    Anne Parillaud
    (1, 2)

    The original Nikita, very young and showing all 3 B's in scenes from "Le Battant" (1983).

    Ann-Margret Bare bum and parital breast views in scenes from "Carnal Knowledge" (1971). For my money, her sexiest role will always be as Rusty Martin in "Viva Las Vegas" (1964)!

    Geno Lechner Topless in the French movie, "Corps plongés" (1998).

    Marika Green
    (1, 2, 3)

    Breasts, bush, and lesbo lovin' from the original "Emmanuelle" (1974).

    Penélope Cruz
    (1, 2)

    Breast exposure in scenes from her two recent American films. Link #1 from "Captain Corelli's Mandolin". Link #2 is from "Vanilla Sky".

    Dominique Swain Bootleg breast exposure from the recently released movie, "New Best Friend".

    Sarah Potts
    (1, 2)

    Vidcaps by Cowman from the movie "Wonderland". Link #1 features toplessness, with a hint of bush and bum. #2 is topless only.

    Jennifer McDonald Vidcaps by Dann from "Headless Body in Topless Bar". No headlessness in these 'caps, but plenty of toplessness.

    Ashley Judd A little bit of everything can be seen as Judd poses nude in the made for cable movie "Norma Jean & Marilyn".

    Paz Vega Comments by C2000:
    Some caps of Vega showing all 3 B's in the Spanish movie "Sex & Lucia" which opened in the UK today. It's full of nudity and fortunately so is the website

    Here are a few links to movie clips from the movie:
    This is a clip of the stripping scene I capped.

    The movie trailer and other clips on the site also feature nudity.

    Pat Reeder

    Here's a news story about Liz Hurley with a photo I thought you'd like to see.

    And here is a story about Celine Dion with possibly the worst picture of anyone I've ever seen.

    Just in case, here's the photo. Yikes!

    Celeb News

    I picked up this tidbit of news from Yahoo. Let us hope Monica is explicitly sexy rather than graphically violent.


    If any film is likely to leave jury members choking on their cocktail olives at this year's Cannes film festival, it will be 'Irreversible' from Argentine-born director Gaspar Noe. The film, starring Monica Bellucci, mixes extreme violence and explicit sex and is set to leave viewers and judges shocked and perhaps disgusted, according to Bellucci.

    Other News