"God Is Great and I'm Not"
God Is Great and I'm Not (2001), or Dieu est grand, je suis toute petite, stars Audrey Tautou, who gives brief glimpses of her breasts. So much for the good news. As the film opens, she is 20, and a successful fashion model, nominally Catholic, has just broken up with her boyfriend and had an abortion, and attempts suicide. Pretty grim stuff, but this is a romantic comedy about her search for enlightenment and true love. After her suicide attempt, she tries Buddhism, but can't stay awake during mediation. She also finds spiritual enlightenment exhausting, then she starts an affair with a non-practicing Jew, who is a veterinarian. Naturally, she becomes obsessed with converting to Judism, which is especially irritating to him, as he is not very religious.
IMDb readers have this at 5.7 of 10. It would be more entertaining to review the reviewers than the film, but I don't want to pick. However, for those who called this a typical flop following a megga hit in a first film, this was shot before Amelie. The problem is not Tautou, or her performance. She was nearly as captivating as she was in Amelie, but the script had neither heart nor soul, and didn't lead to any real truths. She did the best she could with it. There is nothing wrong with the technical side, so I will be generous and say D+. I can't imagine anyone who would enjoy this one.
Pigalle (1994) is an infamous red light district in Paris, full of flesh peddlers, drugs, and the like. This film lets us wallow in it without really learning much about it. Véra Briole is a headlining peep show stripper, likes getting sexually ravaged by her old obnoxious manager, but won't have sex with her best friend, Fifi. Fifi (lets call him poodle boy), is madly in love with Divine, who is either transexual, or just a cross dresses. Divine is killed before we have a chance to find out. There is some sub-plot involving a dope war and bad dope. The big head of the entire mess seems to be the paraplegic evil dwarf in the electric elevator motorized wheel chair. Poodle boy end sup in jail for everybody's sins.
Briole shows breasts and buns frequently, and one flash of bush. IMDb readers have this at 5.1 of 10. I was unable to find anyone who had a nice thing to say about this film. The production quality was dismal, probably as a result of both a low budget and a desire to make the quality as seedy as the story and the district. This is an E. I can't imagine anyone willing to put up with it.
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
.wmv's from Striplight
- Claire Skinner in A Dance to the Music of Time
- Rona de Ricci in The Pit and the Pendulum
The thing I want to talk about with this movie is not the movie
itself, which is a boxing movie exactly like every other boxing
movie you have seen.
Here's the summary:
A poor Latino kid from the New York streets rises to the top in the
boxing ranks, but gradually pushes away all of his old neighborhood
friends so he can party with the Manhattan set. He gets a beautiful
recording artist of a girlfriend, a plush mansion in the 'burbs, and
lots of new friends. He wins the title. He thinks life is pretty
cool until the day when his new manager asks him to throw a fight.
Then he begins to question everything in his life, because
everything he once believed seems to be false. He sees signs, real
or imagined, that his girlfriend may be getting paid to be his
girlfriend. He thinks that he's never actually won a fight on his
own, but has only been on the other side of the fix. He realizes
that none of his new friends are friends at all. He finds out there
may not have been any weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. He finds
out that WWE wrestling results may be pre-arranged. Then he goes
back to his old neighborhood, apologizes to some of the homies, and
finds out that they are betting on him in his next fight, "because
choo represent us, mang. It's a sign of respect."
Now what will he do? Voices run through his head, talking to him
from the past through vales of karma. He hears the old sincere guy
who used to be his trainer before the slick weasels edged him out.
He hears the voice of his brother saying, "I just want to work 23
hours a day so you can be the best." And so forth.
What will he do in the title defense he is supposed to throw? What
WILL he do?
You've seen that before, right?
Don't misunderstand me. There is nothing really incompetent about
this film. It's just that there is nothing new to see.
What I want to talk about is the relationship between HBO and its
talent pool. My hat is off to them for being the perfect company in
the entertainment industry. Did you ever hear any artists say "HBO
fucked me, man"? The cable network does a first-class job on
everything, and their management is not afraid to take risks, either
with controversial subject matter or on untested talent. This film
was written and directed by John Leguizamo, and he also stars as the
boxer, a role for which he lost weight, got in tremendous shape, and
actually got in the ring against real boxers. ("It hurts", was his
concise summary of what happens when a real boxer makes contact with
you.) He had never directed a movie, but HBO rolled the dice on him
and let him do what he wanted, interfering only enough to ask him
what kind of help he needed. Then they guaranteed the film play time
and a top-drawer DVD. There isn't much more an artist can ask for.
The same network also gave Leguizamo his first big break in comedy,
according to the special features on the DVD. HBO's productions
function the way Corman's productions used to function in the 60s
and 70s, as the training grounds for talent, except that HBO opens
up the checkbook a little wider than Corman.
So if the movie isn't a great breakthrough success, it nonetheless
allowed Leguizamo to learn more about the craft of filmmaking, let
him live out his dream, and made him feel greatly indebted to HBO
for their help. With no previous experience, Leguizamo created a
completely coherent and professional-looking film. It's not a
masterpiece, but neither was Boxcar Bertha back in the Corman days,
and that's where Scorcese learned to do his thing.
You just know that HBO will continue to reap long-term rewards from
that kind of positive interaction with the talent pool.
- Vanessa Ferlito (possibly an up-and-coming star) (1,
- Suzy McCoppin (1,
Here's the Courtney Love of the future, Paris Hilton's comical
sidekick, Nicole Richie. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think
she's spent a lot of time in the gym.
Captain Arab tapes gold coin to mast for first
sailor to kill the Great White Bremer. A reward
of gold is also offered for anyone who kills U.N.
Secretary-General Kofi Annan, Annan's envoy to Iraq, or, oddly
enough, Canadian actor/emcee Alan Thicke. (OK, just kidding about
Thicke. The rest is true)
Ex-Nazi corporal says Germany attempted to kidnap
Ike This is a great story. It would make an
excellent movie. Of the 600 men who were to masquerade as
Americans, only 10 could speak English, and even those few
betrayed themselves with British terms, like "petrol" instead of
"gas". Those who weren't killed or captured by Americans were
strafed by their own airplanes. The pilots were never informed
that the impersonators were not really Americans!
Andy Kaufman to return from the dead on May 16th
General Wesley Clark hit the Buffett trifecta -
campaign contributions from Jimmy, Warren, and Peter.
Italian museum unveils a new carving of Christ on
the cross - said to be a lost masterpiece by Michelangelo.
Here's the official trailer from The Chronicles of
Riddick (Don't know about the film, but the
trailer looks very cool)
- From the "unsurprising" department:
Democrats Calling for Rumsfeld's Ouster.
The last couple of days seem to indicate that Rummy may indeed
fall on his sword for the good of the POTUS. .
View the trailer for Seeing Other People
- a Jay Mohr comedy
Watch the first eight minutes of Off the Lip.
Wife of former Enron CFO gets 12-month jail term
The Killer List of Videogames - the IMDb of coin-op
The dictionary of Obscure Sexual Terms.
Including the Davey Crockett, and (of course) the "dreaded Rear
Tina Fey's senior yearbook picture, University of
The man with the smallest penis in the world, and
the electron microscope technician who loved him.
(Turn down your sound if that is an issue)
- We've been punk'd! Remember that pic of the Texas Tech swim
It was actually the Tampa Bay Storm Cheerleaders.
The Sun's headline: "Britney in naked pool romp"
It seems that the British tabloids have all
assigned full-time reporters to Mouseketeer Watch.
China's 'Planet of the Apes'. The
Chinese have gone to war - against Rhesus Monkeys - and they are
not allowed to kill them.
So You've Decided to be Evil: A
Step-by-Step Guide to joining the Forces of Darkness.
Paris Hilton in Pink Bikini!
Woman buys 10,656 Mars bars in London shop, drives
off in limo . I thought Kirstie Alley was in LA.
Limo must have a helluva trunk.
NFL: pre-season power rankings - the Panthers get
MLB caught up in Spider-Man ads.
As part of a marketing alliance between Major League Baseball
Properties, Columbia Pictures and Marvel Studios, webbed logos of
the upcoming film "Spider-Man 2" will appear on bases and on-deck
circles in 15 stadiums of teams playing host to interleague games
June 11-13. Does anyone like this idea?
NCAA Football already? Post-Spring Top 25. Georgia
Alvin and the Chipmunkz do Gangsta Rap.
Banished Words List :: 2004
No Pants Day for 2004 is today, Friday May 7th
Another adult film performer diagnosed as
Wiseacre Danish DJ organizes a charity drive to
provide toilet paper to strike-torn Norway. I
hope it is truly charity and not Lend-Lease.
Housewife to blow Shofar to open Day of Prayer
ceremony. Gardener and Pool Boy to follow in the
Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher have secretly married
- according to America's In Touch magazine. On
the other hand, the article says Demi and Kutcher are the same
age, so it may not be 100% reliable.
Hollywood riled up over ClearPlay.
The censorship software now has 600 titles available without the
violence, vulgar language, ethnic slurs, nudity, etc. I kinda like
it. Watched both parts of Kill Bill in 90 seconds.
Bob Dylan, Keith Richards, Jerry Lee Lewis, Kid
Rock and Merle Haggard were among the 'outlaws and angels' in
Willie Nelson featured in his USA special. The
Wiltern Theater event, dubbed "Willie Nelson & Friends: Outlaws
and Angels," will air as a two-hour special on Memorial Day,
Monday, May 31 at 9:00 p.m. (ET/PT).
The entire SNL cast breaks up and gets the giggles
during Debbie Downer.
Jennifer Aniston will carry an Olympic torch.
To be more precise, Gunther will carry a torch for her.
- War news from Norway:
Blatant abuses by the Norwegian Military during the
Iraq war. They ordered pizza, and didn't leave a
tip! Some soldiers even made long distance calls without
Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat fortified his West
Bank headquarters with old cars, fearing an Israeli invasion is
imminent. Arafat wisely realizes that the
Israeli Army has only one major vulnerability - used cars. The
soldiers just can't resist a chance to haggle over price.
Supermodel Campbell wins privacy fight with British
Which movie poster has been voted the best ever?
Even mobsters aren't cruel enough to eat veal.
(It's pedantic, but pretty slick)
The internet-exclusive trailer for Alien Vs.
Predator. It looks like the effects might just
work, but the trailer gives no hint of the storyline.
- This week's movies:
New York Minute - 27% positive reviews.
Will bring in the pre and young teen girls. But how many and for
- This week's movies:
Van Helsing - 29% positive reviews.
Will pull in the fanboys at first, but will it justify its
- Johnny Web and JK tangle over Lars von Trier's arty
Mike "Ace" Bigelow will make his feature directing
debut on Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo. The
trade says the likeness in names between the director and the
character is coincidental, but the compatibility between the
risque humor in the sequel and his commercials got Bigelow the
The President is short on his petty cash fund in
Iraq, asks Congress to put another $25 billion in his piggy bank.
Computer glitch gives out free gasoline.
The good news for college kids: they got free gas by swiping their
drivers' licenses instead of a credit card. The bad news: doing
that also gave the police their names and addresses!
Optical discs, including DVDs, may be a lot less
long-lived than first thought.
"Rush Limbaugh put it all in perspective, after a
caller remarked that the pyramid 'stack [of] naked men' was 'like
a college fraternity prank.' " Jesus, did he
really say something as insensitive as what follows? They need to
get him back on those meds.
- RUSH: Exactly. Exactly my point! This is no different than
what happens at the skull and bones initiation and we're going
to ruin people's lives over it and we're going to hamper our
military effort, and then we are going to really hammer them
because they had a good time. You know, these people are being
fired at every day. I'm talking about people having a good time,
these people, you ever heard of emotional release? You of heard
of need to blow some steam off?
- I tried to get the correct context from Rush's web site, but
that transcript was in a members' area.
"Friends" Spoilers - - the Finale
.... Cute. Personally, I still like
my version better.
The American Assembler - States With Higher IQs
Anna Nicole Walks Out On Howard Stern Show:
"'You owe me an apology; you called me a big, fat, porker pig and
tried to get me up on a scale.' "
Playmate Gallery - Alicia Rickter, October, 1995 -
Courtesy of PlayboyPlus.com!
Four short sample vids from Playboy's Beach Babes!
Bush Approval on Iraq, Economy, and Terrorism at
Low Points. Presidential contest a dead heat.
Two way goes 49-48 Kerry. Three way goes 47-47-3. (Sampling error
+ or - 3.) Big change is that the "battleground states" now go
48-44 Kerry. Bush's 44 is down from 49 in mid-April.
President Bush chastised his defense secretary,
Donald H. Rumsfeld, for mishandling the prisoner abuse scandal
Picasso's "Boy With a Pipe" sells for $104 million
at Sotheby's. The price, which included the
auction house's commission, easily eclipsed the old mark of $82.5
million set by van Gogh's "Portrait of Dr. Gachet," which had
stood since 1990 when speculation took hold of the art market. .
archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
to submit a URL for Other Crap
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
Words from Scoop.
.avi's from Shiloh.
.wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.
Alison Eastwood in Friends and Lovers. Bogus
movie, but nice nudity from ol' Dirty Harriet herself. (.avi, .wmv)
One more of Alison Eastwood in Friends and
Lovers. (.avi, .wmv)
Tinto alert! Rafaella Offidani in The Voyeur (.avi, .wmv)
Rafaella Offidani in The Voyeur, Part 2. Highly
advanced lesbotronic adventures.(.avi, .wmv)
Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble
with the codecs for these movies:
FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use
DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use
virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the
vids says the video codec: DivX Decoder Filter & audio
codec: Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with.
When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG
Layer-3. A friend of mine told me about compressing the
audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been
capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this
info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp &
asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using
camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could
never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost
too much to buy in my opinion.
A reader says:
You mentioned that some users were
having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool
designed to determine what codec is needed for a video.
http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you
or your users.
I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9.
The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in
the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly
larger, and slightly lower quality.
'Caps and comments by Graphic Response:
"Love Actually" (2003)
This was a terrific "feel Good " movie. I highly recommend it.
Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website. www.graphic-barry.com.
'Caps and comments by Brainscan:
Rush Hour 2 suffers from the sequel syndrome, as all
interesting edges from the original are scraped and
sanded and buffed until you got yourself a nice shiny,
so very smooth and so terribly bland product. Think
of the difference between the original Lethal Weapon
and Lethal Weapon 4... that's the difference between
Rush Hour and Rush Hour 2. Only thing is Rush Hour
did not leave much room to fall and the makers
accomplished the full plummet in one movie instead of
three. IMDb says 6.5 out of 10, but I don't see how
it merits a score above 5.0. Can't wait for RH3, due
out in 2005.
Bottom line of this movie is that, no, I do not
understand the words coming out of your mouth...
either of you... and I do not really care to, either.
Not much skin at all. Former Heffer Angela Little
shows some cleavage as "Tex's girlfriend." That
there's Tex in the cowboy hat, which my trips through
DFW tell me is required equipment for all Texan males
30 or more pounds overweight. To the right of Tex is
former Heffer Julia Schulz. What a waste to hire both
these gals and give them nothing to take off... I
mean, nothing to do.
Roselyn Sanchez seems to have begun her career as the
Queen of Tease with this movie. She has expanded upon
it in Boat Trip and in a few dozen red carpet
appearances. Here she sits disdainfully in a dress
cut down to "thar" (as Tex would say) and then gives
up a little of her bountiful bum and way more cleavage
as our heroes spy on her and then rush to rescue her.
As long as it was for a good cause, I guess.
A covey of curvaceous Hong Kong girls play
"hostesses." Is that what they call 'em over there?
IMDb names a few of the women and I recognized Natasha
Yi from a spread Celebrity Sleuth did a couple years
ago. So here she is, well clothed for a hostess.
Key Exchange (1985) is a somnolent only slightly less
powerful than chloroform or CSPAN. It's a talk-fest
all about relationships among young folk who ride
ten-speed bikes a lot. 'Nuff said.
So why bother watching it?
Well, Brooke Adams gets ever so briefly nekkid and you
can see one of her impressive twins for about five
frames... more if you include the time she spends
behind a translucent shower curtain. That's one
The real reason is Sandra Beall.
A brief digression. I am of the mind that you can
track the range of involvement in an arcane field...
from interested through committed to obsessed by the
mention of a few words. Take naked movie stars.
Jennifer Connelly. Everyone interested in women who
have given up on-screen goodies knows her, can
recognize instantly. No special skills required.
Linnea Quigley. Well, now you're getting into some
esoterica. Babe's been nekkid many times as her body
changed shape in ways unnatural. Most everyone who
has read the Funhouse for more than six weeks knows
her, but the average joe out there in the real world
would be hard-pressed to pick her out of a line-up.
Sandra Beall. Here we are treading in the land of the
obsessed. Serious veteran nekkid-babe watching
terriroty is what I'm talking about. Why's that?
Sandra is not near 'bout perfect... she is perfect.
Natural red hair with the complexion to match, and a
body that, gentlemen, none of us would mind growing
old watching. That's what catches the eye and holds
the attention. But she was in precious few
productions, almost always late in the list of
credits, and... here's the important point... naked
only in Key Exchange. Well, topless. So even though
others have capped this scene and Key Exchange is
available only on VHS, I just had to grab some frames
and stick them together. Had to. Obsession is not
such a bad thing, ya know.
First up from the Ghost....
Behold, a rarity in the world of Skinemax, natural breasts.
- Brandy Davis topless and showing a little bit of pubes and rear nudity in scenes from "Carnal Sins" (2001).
Next up...the supermodel and sometimes actress wearing a bikini in scenes from her screen debut "Alien from L.A." (1988).
- Kathy Ireland
- Kathy Ireland .wms
Finally, The Ghost takes us back to 1984 for these video clips from "Fear City". Both ladies were in their 20's at the time and looked great playing topless dancers.
'Caps and comments by Dann:
A sugary, sappy, and somewhat lame 2004 romantic comedy, fun to watch if you're in the mood for brainless fun. You get pretty much what you expect when you sit down to watch the film.
Mandy Moore plays the 18-year-old daughter of the President of the Unites States, who is so fed up with being trailed every moment of the day by the Secret Service that she "escapes" her handlers while on a tour of Europe. When she meets an English tourist and takes off on a road trip, she doesn't know he is in fact an agent planted to protect her. Oh, and guess what....they fall in love.
Bad as it sounds, it's a cute and harmless comedy that tweens will like, and an added bonus is the very hot blond Beatrice Rosen who plays a French friend of the First Daughter.
|Talk Show Round Up
'Caps and comments by Brainscan:
- Jenny McCarthy showing some cleavage and playing with her boobs on Howard Stern. Hard to believe it's been 10 years since she was crowned Heffer o' the year!
- Lauren Holly, barely keeping the twins stuffed into her dress while appearing on "The Late Late Show with Craig Kilborn".
- Mila Kunis, the co-star of "That 70's Show" showing some leg on Conan.
- Lindsay Lohan showing some cleavage on Ellen DeGeneres' talk show.
- Kate Beckinsale looking gorgeous on "Last Call with Carson Daly".
|Marvin 'caps of the French actress bares all (quite often in fact) in scenes from the 1975 erotic drama, "Histoire d'O" aka "The Story of O". Click here for Tuna's review of "...O".
|Señor Skin takes a look at the Skinemax flick "Erotic Obsessions" (2002). Plenty of skin and pseudo sex.
|Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
Pat's comments in yellow...
NO NEW TRIAL FOR MARTHA
Bad News For Comedy Writers - Wednesday, a federal judge rejected Martha
Stewart's motion for a new trial, ruling that her complaint that one juror
didn't reveal his entire arrest record didn't justify vacating her
conviction. The juror's girlfriend once had him arrested for assault, then
dropped the charges. Martha's lawyers claimed this "gender-related
incident" showed he could not possibly sit in judgment of a highly
Who was his girlfriend, Donatella Versace?
His charges were dropped...That's a concept Martha can't possibly
Okay, then how about this: That juror wore white after Labor Day, so he
was guilty of a felony.
POP STARS TO COMPETE TO GET IN HALL OF FAME
Hall Of Lame - "Pop Idol," the British parent show of "American Idol," is
launching a new show, "Hall of Fame," that is a mirror image of the
original. Some of the biggest names in pop from the past five decades will
be nominated for a "Hall of Fame," but they'll have to perform live in
front of three judges, then let viewers vote on which ones deserve to be
Let's see, who will I vote for? Tom Jones or the 1910 Fruitgum
We could finally get even for the Beatles losing the Grammy to the New
Perform live? What if they're dead?
If some once-famous pop star wants to come out of retirement and
humiliate himself, he can just play Las Vegas.
MADONNA SEEKS TO KEEP OUT THE RIFFRAFF
Reinforced Borderline - Madonna and her husband Guy Ritchie are challenging
a law that allows hikers to cross 100 acres of their 1200-acre English
country estate. They claim this violates their human rights by invading
their privacy and exposing them to tabloid photographers, stalkers and
other celebrity-obsessed people. They want the 100 acres reclassified as
hunting land to keep commoners off of it. But officials say they're
unlikely to make exceptions to the law for the rich and famous.
But that's what Madonna LIKED about England!
Madonna considers it hunting land because if she sees any commoners on
it, she shoots them.
Foxhunters don't bother them...Madonna's not that foxy.
This leaves them only 1100 acres! How can they have any privacy with
only 1100 acres?!