Tuesday

Tuna
"The Hunted"

The Hunted (1995) is a Japanese/American co-production. An American businessman, after a successful meeting, he meets a gorgeous woman, Joan Chen, in the hotel bar, takes her out to a drum concert, and is then invited into her room. He leaves, but returns when he discovers that he took her key, not his. She is about to be decapitated by the most evil and skillful of all ninjas. At her request, he reveals his face. Our hero sees it after she has been decapitated, making him the only man who can identify the evil ninja. His two henchmen slit his throat and use a poison dagger on him, but he somehow survives. His doctor brings in the greatest Samurai warrior and teacher to help him. What follows in a predictable series of bloody battles and ninja training, all leading to the final showdown.

Joan Chen shows a breast in a hot bath sex scene, and an unknown gives a three B performance. This is an entertainment film which relies on action to hold your interest, and, at least for me, it did that. Additionally, the swordplay seemed believable. You do not want to think too much about the plot. In fact, if you do, the film has failed in its goals. IMDb readers have it at 5.3 of 10. This is a C, a no depth actioner with martial arts ninjas with bad attitudes. A drunk sword maker effectively provides some comic relief.

  • Thumbnails
  • Thumbnails

  • Joan Chen (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • Unknown (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Other Crap:

    Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the links above, since it's sorta in real time.

    Click here to submit a URL for Other Crap

     

     

    MOVIE REVIEWS:

    Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

     

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Jr's Polls
    Scoop came up with a good idea for our next poll that should stir up some conversation, if not some controversy.

    This week's poll....

    The Most Overrated movie.

    Here's a short list to kick things off...

    Napoleon Dynamite
    Eyes Wide Shut
    The English Patient
    Titanic
    The Rocky Horror Picture Show
    Blair Witch Project
    Chariots of Fire
    Sideways
    The Piano
    Dances Wiith Wolves
    The Empire Strikes Back
    Forrest Gump
    Swingers
    The Phantom Menace
    Out of Africa
    American Beauty
    Life is Beautiful
    Requiem for a Dream
    Donny Darko
    Gone With The Wind
    2001
    The Perfect Storm
    Mystic River
    The Matrix
    Citizen Kane
    The Godfather
    Lost in Translation
    Singin’ in the Rain
    Fahrenheit 9/11

    Email Scoopy Jr. if you'd like to add nominees.


    Here are the results of our previous polls:
    The Top 20 Nude Scenes of 2004
    The Best Nude Film Debuts of the 80s
    The Best Nude Film Debuts of the 90s
    Which actress has been the most convincing playing a stripper.
    Who has the best bum in Hollywood?
    Best All Time Television Comedy
    Best Nudity in an Oscar-winning performance
    The Top 20 Best Straight Sex Scenes
    Best Lesbian Love Scenes


    Crimson Ghost
    NOTE: We currently have to do all of our movie files in zip format. Instead of viewing them online, save the zip files to your hard drive in the directory of your choice, un-zip and play from there.


    Today from the Ghost...several vids (zipped .wmvs) from the Skinemax movie "Hollywood Sex Fantasy" (2001).

    • Catalina Larranaga...the beautiful brunette is topless in all of these. Plus we also get some brief bum (4 and 5) and pube views (#5). (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    • Kelli McCarty...the former Miss USA (1991) going topless and showing some thong views while riding a dude.

    • Tracy Ryan, the naturally busty adult star shows off her wonderful toplessness as well as some thong views while stripping for and then gettin' it on with a dude.

    • Flower Edwards, the adult film actress turned "legit" softcore actress. Here she is topless and also in undies. (1, 2, 3)

    • Adult stars Teanna Kai and Ava Vincent doing some nekkid swimming (#1) and then having some pool sex in #2. (1, 2)

    • Teanna Kai and Keri Windsor both bare all while havin a little lesbo and 3-way fun. (1, 2, 3)

    Spaz
    'Caps and comments by Spaz:

    "Bikini Squad" (1993)
    Baywatch spoof with a generous amount of nudity although it's evident the actresses shaved their clams.

    • Maureen Flaherty: boobs ahoy in nude sex scene. (1, 2, 3, 4)
    • Donna Baltron: boobs and coochie-cam in dental floss cutoff shorts. (1, 2, 3)
    • Julie Strain: robohooters reading for part on casting couch. (1, 2)
    • Rebecca Rocherford: brassiere only.
    • Cornellia Johnson: nice bikini cleavage but face covered in bandages. Hey, at least she can do some body double roles.


    "Street Angels" (1993)
    Grade-Z action from the Kill or Be Killed DVD collection.


    "Flight to Danger" (1995)
    Another grade-Z action from the same collection. Written, directed and produced by b-movie babes Sara Matthews and Gina Jourard.

    Variety
    Jennifer Garner
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    DeadLamb takes a look at her recent box office dud, "Elektra" (2005). Here we see the "Alias" star showing a little skin (mostly abs) and wearing some skin tight outfits.

    Sean Young Here is the "Blade Runner" babe showing some serious cleavage and a bit of bum in the 1993 Crime/thriller parody, "Fatal Instinct" (1993).

    Miranda Otto
    (1, 2, 3)

    Johnny Moronic 'caps of the Aussie actress going topless and also giving us an upskirt view in scenes from "In the Winter Dark" (1998). Look for her on the big screen this June in the Steven Spielberg version of "War of the Worlds", starring Tom Cruise.

    Tracy Ryan
    and
    Renee Rea
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)


    Starbase 'caps featuring both ladies of late night having some lesbo and 3-way fun in the shower. Scenes from the Skinemax flick "Forbidden" (2002).


    Nicole Kidman
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)

    Señor Skin 'caps of the sexy red head baring all in scenes from the 1991 movie, "Billy Bathgate".

    Mail Bag
    Subject: "Enterprise"
    Scoops,
    First of all, I have to say the ending for the 2 part "In a mirror darkly" was horrible.

    However....during the dark sex scene with Captain Archer and his consort (Linda Park), I could swear that I saw a very good silhouette of her nipple. Did anyone get any 'caps of that scene?

    -M.


    Subject: Lita on Raw!
    Scoops,
    Did anyone get 'caps of Lita and her "shirt" on Monday night's Raw?

    -T

    Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    CD GUARANTEED TO ANNOY NEIGHBORS
    If Your Neighbor Is Playing 50 Cent, He Wins - A new CD called "The Revenge CD" is the first CD that comes with a pair of ear plugs for the buyer. It contains 20 sounds just to annoy neighbors you can't stand, including a bowling alley, loud drill, high heels pacing on a hardwood floor, freight train and screaming orgasm. NYU Prof. Tom Meyvis used it on his psychology class and said he found that the best way to use it is to play a bit, then stop, then start again, and it becomes unbearable. If you play it constantly, people get used to it and ignore it.

  • That's how so many people can stand to live in New York City.
  • Unless it's a Britney Spears CD; then constant is best.
  • What if your neighbor retaliates by playing the William Hung CD?!...That didn't come with ear plugs, but it should have.
  • The best revenge is driving your neighbor crazy by actually having screaming orgasms.


    MEN GET ALONG OKAY WITHOUT WOMEN
    They Fed The Pet To Some Coyotes, But Still... - For a reality show, all the women in Harby, England, were sent on a week's vacation, and the men were filmed coping without them. The BBC hoped to catch hilarious squalor and chaos, but while a few had trouble, most men managed not only to make food, feed the pets and get the kids to school, they also built a fence around the town's playing field, held a bake sale, and organized a feast and a musical show to welcome their wives back.

  • But it should be noted that the choreography of the musical was lacking in pizzazz.
  • And their British cooking was no more awful than their wives' British cooking.
  • See, men don't really NEED women for anything but sex!

  • A quick site note
    Hey gang, we invite you to check out our new affiliate program at Scoopycash.com.

    If you have your own site or blog, sign up today and earn some extra cash in 2005 by promoting the Fun House!