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Jennifer Love Hewitt
JLH see-through. First real look at those marvelously large assets. What else is there to say? Click on it, it gets bigger. Provided by c2000.
"Turks Fruit" (1973)

Turks Fruit (1973) was just released in the US as Turkish Delight, a perfect translation of Turks Fruit into English of the candy known in Turkey as Lokum. It is also known as the film that ate my life for two days. Think of this film as "Love Story" European edition, but with more honesty, more passion, and a whole lot more exposure. It was directed by Paul Verhoeven and was voted the best Dutch film of the 20th century by Nederlands Film Festival. It marked the debut of Monique van de Ven in the female lead, and is likely Rutger Hauer's best performance as the male lead. We have tons of full-frontal, both male and female, known and unknown.

As the film opens, we see Hauer's fantasies of best was to torture and kill his ex-wife and her boyfriend. He is laying on his back in bed in an apartment so filthy you can smell it through the monitor. He then sees a box of pictures of his ex on the floor, sticks one to the wall, and bops the old baloney staring at it. Thus, we find out that he is very bitter and depressed about the breakup, but still deeply in love and lust with her. The next 15 minutes are amazing. Hauer's character (Erik Vonk) decides to clean up his act and screw his way back to health and happiness with a parade of women. The first, he dismisses as soon as the sex is over (Unknown 1). When she complains that she has nothing to remember her by, he draws her a rough sketch of his organ. His second conquest, he meets when he jumps into her convertible and refuses to get out. Cut to her trying to take her top off and asking for help. He says, "Don't bother, I'll just use the bottom half." The way he uses her bottom half is by cutting off a hunk of pubic hair and pasting it in his scrap book of conquests in front of her (Unknown 2 image 5).

Next, we have a rather unremarkable scene with a naked woman eating a banana (Unknown 3). Then he is in bed with Unknown 4, and, after sex, tells her that her butt has too much fat. When she retaliates by making a comment about his ex, he throws her naked into the street. He brings home Unknown 5, and starts to undress her, but doesn't even get inside the apartment when he realizes that this woman can't replace his ex either.

Cut to two years earlier, and the actual love story. Since I am strongly recommending this film, I don't want to give away too many details, but the formula is boy finds girl, boy looses girl, boy finds girl, boy looses girl. Along they way, they engage in mishaps, passion, battles and adventures that include him zipping a testicle up in his fly. He is a sculptor and a rebel. She is young and living at home, but certainly no virgin. She picks him up hitch hiking, and they pull into a rest stop and bone away in the front seat. They do marry, but she is too young, and he is too possessive eventually driving her away. She complains that all he wants is sex and a figure model; she is young enough that she still wants to party with friends. The film gets dramatically better marks from women, probably because they understand that his obsession with her was not what she needed.

If you started the film without knowing anything about it, you would probably think like I did that it was going to be a particularly bloody serial killer film. In the course of relating the relationship between Hauer and van de Ven, there are some very ugly images of worms, maggots, rot and decay all Peter Greenaway. I could have done without them, but that did not ruin the film for me.

I know Scoopy ordered this one, and I look forward to his comments.

  • Monique van de Ven Thumbnails
  • Monique van de Ven Thumbnails
  • Monique van de Ven Thumbnails
  • Monique van de Ven Thumbnails

  • Monique van de Ven
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46,)

  • Unknown #1 (1, 2, 3, 4)
  • Unknown #2 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • Unknown #3
  • Unknown #4 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
  • Unknown #5 (1, 2)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    What a week! Only three new releases this week, none of them great, and not a bit of discernible nudity in any of them.

    All the Pretty Horses. The DVD of this cowboy film was delayed a week, so I looked at the tape. Penelope Cruz pops out of the water topless in a nighttime skinny dipping scene, but I couldn't see anything or capture anything. Will try again with the DVD next week. Penelope looked great.  I'm sure the film would have had some strengths, if only I could have stayed awake to see them. 

    Bojangles. Pretty good performances wasted in a corny old-fashioned biopic of tap dancer Bill Robinson. Sanitized, unfocused, cliched, but worth a watch in two cases: (1) if you like tap dancin' or  (2) if you're interested in a painless history lesson. No nudity.

    Miss Congeniality. I could write the same review of all Sandra Bullock movies "Sandra is charming. Movie sucks. No nudity". Just xerox that and apply to all of her past and future projects. All kidding aside, this film is much better than the ones she's been churning out lately. In fact, this is probably her best comedy, and I though it was generally watchable with a funny supporting cast. 

    Renée Coleman Topless in "Who's Harry Crumb?" (1989). If you missed it any of the 500 times it's been on cable this past's worthy of renting. Not a bad choice if selection at the local Video-Shanty is low, or if all of the movies on the New Release rack have been out for over a year.

    Classic John Candy, and of course it also co-stars one of Scoop's heroes, Tim Thomerson.

    Thandie Newton
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Gettin' it on with Bon Jovi in "The Leading Man".

    Zoe McLellan
    (1, 2, 3)

    Zoe (altered)
    (1, 2, 3)

    Partial breast exposure from "Stranger in My House", aka "Total Stranger". These scenes are either dark, or carefully angled to keep the goodies just out of sight. I did a hack job at altering them a tad and it did bring out a bit of areola in #1 and #3.

    Ameenah Kaplan Topless in scenes from her only IMDb credit, "Broken Silence" (1996).

    Barbara De Rossi Breast exposure in a love scene from an episode of the Euro TV show "Verwirrung des Herzens".

    Christina Plate A brief, single exposed breast, plus some partial breast views from "Liebe unter weißen Segeln".

    Cornelia Köndgen Topless from 1977's "Eine Jugendliebe".

    Gesine Cukrowski A bit of breast, plus plenty of full dorsal nudity from an episode of "Der Letzte Zeuge".

    Hildegard Knef Old school German nudity. Setting the Way-Back machine all the way to 1951! Here are scenes from "Die Sünderin". By the way, Hildegard Knef is now around 76 years old, and is still making the occasional movie. I'm guessing that she's probably not doing any more nude scenes though.

    Katharina Schüttler She's topless and in good lighting in these 'caps from "Ausgerastet". However, I think her "breasts" could easily be mistaken for some kind swelling that occurred as the result of an insect bite. Possibly a bee sting.

    Monika Baumgartner Full frontal nudity in "Die "Rumplhanni" (1983).

    Naomi Krauss Breast exposure in a couple of sex scenes from "Nicht ohne dich"

    Nicolette Krebitz Side breast exposure and a nice rear view with bikini bottoms. Scenes from "Long Hello and Short Goodbye" (1999).

    A slight departure from the fashion scans. I hope no one minds a little nudity? How 'bout a few pics of Drew Barrymore and Georgina Grenville showing off their goods in almost every image?

    Comments by Blackshine:
    The Drew and Georgina Pictures are from a book called "A Private View" by photographer Sante D'Orazio. It features about 120 pages of female celebrities and models and 100 pages of male celebrities. More to come!

  • Drew Barrymore (1, 2, 3, 4)

  • Georgina Grenville (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Part 6 of the Fashion scans...

  • Thumbnail index page

  • Milla Jovovich
  • Tanga Moreau
  • Vanessa Lorenzo (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
  • Daniela Pestova
  • Danielle Farrell
  • Karen Elson
  • Britney Spears
  • Mini Anden
  • Christy Turlington (1, 2)

  • and ...
    Joan Chen Here's an obscure reference...As the TV commercial goes "When you say taco, say Viva". Today I'm updating that to "When you say naked female monk movies, say 'You Seng'". Ok, so maybe it doesn't have quite the same ring to it, but I think the message is valid. After all, how many naked female monk movies can you name?

    "You Seng" (1993) is a Hong Kong flick that is also known as "Temptation of a Monk", and stars Joan Chen, who apparently also entered a "Mr. Clean Look-a-like" contest during filming.

    Thanks to Don Juan for these excellent topless, (and hairless) images.

    Rosanna Arquette Looking great in black undies, and even better out of them! Topless scene from "Black Rainbow" (1990), by Hannes.

    Tanya Roberts The original "Sheena". Unlike the new TV version, this one is nice and topless. Thanks to UC99.

    Lara Guirao The movie is "L.627". It's French, so of course that means full frontal nudity. Thanks again to UC99.

    Click Here!