"The Crazies"

The Crazies (1979) is an excellent Action / Horror / Thriller / Drama / Sci-Fi from George Romero (Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Day of the Dead ). A military transport crashes, and a biological weapon is released in a lake that feed the water supply to a small town. At the first sign of infection, the army is brought in to contain the area and keep the incident quiet. The virus does one of two things. It either kills the victim, or renders them mad. The story centers on an Ex Green Beret, and his wife (Lane Carroll), who is pregnant and nurse to the town doctor. The doctor gives her some antibiotics for her husband, and suggests that the two of them go hide. They pick up his best friend and another couple along the way.

As the disease spreads, the army is considering a tactical nuke to stop the infection, and it gets harder to tell who is crazy from infection, and who is cracking under the stress. The towns people don't take to martial law well, and start fighting back. Meanwhile there is a back story, as the Army fights to find a cure. Carroll shows breasts in bed with her husband near the start of the film, partial buns getting dressed, and pretty cute bra and panty shots.

IMDB readers have this at 5.7 of 10. I thought they accomplished a lot with an interesting story and a very small budget. Romero's quick cut editing style is very much in evidence here, and is effective. The lack of Hollywood shots (all boom, dolly and special effects) gave this film an immediacy that helped build the atmosphere. This is a solid C, but is more a thriller/SciFi than horror.

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  • Lane Carroll (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)


    Another Day in Paradise (1998)

    This Larry Clark movie managed to do nothing with a cast that included James Woods, Melanie Griffith and Wagner. It's really a same old same old, and I can't give you one good reason to see the movie itself unless you like classic R&B, in which case the music is outstanding. I'm an Otis Redding fan, and he's the backbone of the score. Clarence Carter actually appears in the movie.

    The DVD is a great rent, however, because of the additional materials. One scene got cut to avoid a NC-17 rating. Wagner goes for the man-slurpee, there is graphic male nudity, and lots of really dirty talk, and a very hot sex scene which includes every ingredient except Wagner nudity. That scene has been restored on the DVD, and there is also a second audio track with director's commentary, which is fascinating. Larry Clark, the director, is no NASA candidate, but he is very candid and outspoken in his down-home no-bullshit Oklahoma way, so his unguarded comments offer real insight into the moviemaking process. While I can't recommend the amateurish and vastly overrated movie, which isn't a hell of a lot better than "I Spit on Your Grave", I recommend the DVD heartily. Listen to the songs, watch a few scenes of James Woods going ballistic, listen to the director's commentary, and satisfy your curiosity about the deleted scene. By the way, the DVD got printed wrong. The director's cut and commentary are on the opposite side from where they should be.

    When it came out, I scored it C-, Tuna was slightly more enthusiastic at C. He said, "The film is mostly dark and grainy, and is very slow moving for a crime/action flick. This is a passable genre film, and not much more."

    As Tuna noted, the images were dark, blurry, grainy, and generally difficult to work with.

    • Natasha Gregson Wagner (1, 2)

    The Ages of Lulu (1990)


    Based entirely on what can be seen on this Spanish DVD, this film is not worth your time. It is basically the quality of a good home movie. Think of "Clerks" without the humor. The film's only real value is as a piece of erotica. The plot and characterization are essentially unimportant and lacking in credibility. Indeed, it might actually be a good piece of erotica if we could see what's happening, because there's some hot goings-on and Francesca Neri is gorgeous. Maybe there is a good print of this somewhere, but this particular transfer is filled with blur, color fading and visible interlacing.

    Not many people will enjoy this somewhat depraved look at Lulu's eventual fall into bizarre play-for-pay practices, especially if you don't have any inclination to see naked men dancing around and waving their willies. Even those few who would enjoy it will not be able to enjoy it on this poorly transferred DVD. I rated it a D, but I suppose I would have said "C- as an erotic flick" if I could have seen what was going on instead of some dark, blurry images.

    Tuna rated it a C-, saying, "The film is highly thought of in many circles. Had the transfer been better, I might have felt the same way, but didn't find it especially stimulating"


    More from the French Box collection:


    Tinto Brass:

    • I received these in .zip files from a new contributor. The ones labeled TintoSenso are from Brass's new movie, Senso '45. The ones labeled TintoVoy are from Tinto Brass's previous movie, Trasgredire. I've never seen either of these movies, and I don't recognize these scenes from any other caps, so I'm no help with the ID's. Those of you with more info about the women pictured, please chime in.


    Other crap:

    Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    'Caps and comments by Hankster:

    Okay, it took 3 days but we finally wrap up the classic rape scene with Susan George topless in 1971's "Straw Dogs". I just loved this movie.

    Ana Claudia Talancón
    (1, 2)

    Showing some skin in scenes from the the Mexican movie "The Crime of Father Amaro" (2002). Very nice breast exposure in a love scene in link #1. In #2 we see her looking sexy in white undies.

    Annabel Schofield
    (1, 2)

    The UK model turned actress topless in two movies. Link #1 is a dark topless scene from the 1987 movie "Dragonard" (1987). Link #2 features much better lighting in a shower scene from the 1990 sci-fi stinker "Solar Crisis".

    Sherry Stringfield Rear nudity from a rerun of "NYPD Blue".

    PK Orion
    'Caps from the 1971 Euor-Sleaze film, "The Devi's Nightmare" aka:

    Au service du diable (1971)
    Castle of Death (1971) (video title)
    The Devil Walks at Midnight (1971)
    The Devil's Longest Night (1971)
    Nightmare of Terror (1971) (video title)
    La Notte piu lunga del diavolo (1971) (Italy)
    La Nuit des pétrifiés (1971)
    Succubus (1971)
    La Terrificante notte del demonio (1971)
    Vampire Playgirls (1980) (USA: reissue title)

    Juding by IMDb comments this seems to be typical of the genre, complete with creepy old castle and lesbians.

    • Erika Blanc showing a hint of nipple.
    • 3 Unknowns with plenty of lovely breast exposure and the apreviously mentioned lesbo lovin in link #2. (1, 2, 3)

    Ann Archer

    Julianne Moore
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14)

    Lori Singer
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    Kudos to Señor Skin for finding a European DVD of the Robert Altman movie "Short Cuts". Currently this is not available in the US on DVD!

    The nudity...
    Anne Archer...bare bum.
    Julianne Moore, lower frontal nudity and rear views.
    Lori Singer, full frontal and rear nudity.

    Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    Ozzy, You're A Rich Man - According to the London Sunday Times' annual "Rich List," Paul McCartney is still the richest musician in the UK with $1.2 billion, although Ozzy Osbourne joined the list at #24, after making $63 million off the "Osbournes" TV show.

  • Too bad you can't buy new brain cells.
  • At last, he can afford to HIRE someone to clean up after his dogs!

    Vanilla Ass - Britain's Channel 4 has produced a documentary on Jennifer Lopez called "Behind The Behind" that attacks her boast that she's still "Jenny from the block." It claims she actually came from a very nice New York suburb, had a private education and experienced none of the tough upbringing she sings about. Former neighbors called her "as artificial as a plastic rose." They said she snubbed them when they asked her to attend a fundraiser for a kids' baseball team her dad used to help coach, and bitterly noted that she shot the "Jenny From The Block" video in California.

  • She had to: her real block was too upscale.
  • California has lots of actors who specialize in looking like Bronx gang members.
  • J-Lo said they could kiss her ass, but who has that much time?
  • Anyone who ever thought she was just "Jenny from the block" is a blockhead.
  • Next thing you know, we'll be hearing that Eminem isn't really white.

    He'd Be Dead-On - O.J. Simpson claims he's been contacted by TV outlets about doing play-by-play for Robert Blake's murder trial, and he said, "I'd love to do it." O.J. said, "I think I have a lot of insight."

  • Sharp, cutting insights...
  • He knows how a killer thinks!...You know, from all those movie roles he played...
  • Maybe O.J. can finally catch the "real killer"...Robert Blake!