Dirty O'Neil


Dirty O'Neil is a long forgotten artifact of the early 70s drive-in era, and contains most of the usual characteristics of that sub-genre: a bit of violence, a few car chases, some comedy, amateurish acting, confusing editing, and lots of attractive female flesh.

The titular O'Neil is a tall, handsome young cop in what must be, according to the dialogue, the most boring small town in America. The lack of action gives the patrolman plenty of time to pursue his favorite extracurricular activity, which is to bed beautiful women. The plot, such as it is, centers around a trio of lowlifes who wander into the sleepy town while on the lam. It isn't long before the baddies realize the quiet town might represent some easy pickin's, so they start robbing and raping, and thus forcing the laid-back local cop to fight some real crime, big city style.

This effort may be a cut above the typical drive-in fare, if for no other reason than it was scripted by Leon Capetanos, who would later team with mainstream director Paul Mazursky to write some fairly good scripts like Moon Over Parador, Moscow on the Hudson, The Tempest and Down and Out in Beverly Hills. Unfortunately, Capetanos didn't restrict his participation in Dirty O'Neil to scripting duties. He also directed the film, and he showed far less talent in that capacity, as the film is clumsy and poorly paced. Within a year Capetanos would give up on directing, or maybe it gave up on him. Either way, he eventually managed a solid career as a screenwriter.

The exploitation elements of this film are oddly inconsistent. At times it's balls-to-the-wall violence and full frontal nudity. At other times, the violence (from the same perpetrators) is remarkably subdued and the sex is bewilderingly coy. A couple of examples of the latter:
  • Sultry Anitra Ford was no stranger to screen nudity, having bared all in several other films from the same era. In this flick, however, Ford grabs the cop's gun, tells him to undress her and ... nothing. The scene cuts off abruptly.
  • Beautiful Ella Edwards plays a hooker who throws Dirty O'Neil a complimentary fuck, but nothing is seen on camera. The invitation is portrayed, and the post-coital discussion, but nothing in between!
  • August, 1974 Playmate Jeane Manson is brutally raped by all three of the baddies, and the film devotes several minutes of running time to that unpleasantness, but no part of Manson's body is exposed in that footage. Earlier in the film, Manson drops in to the cop's apartment for some booty calls, but all the good stuff occurs off-camera. (She does later bare a single breast when the baddies come back to rob her cafe.)

Those scenes seemed to be designed specifically for nudity, but the nudity never happened.

Anyway, here are the women who DO get naked, and there were many:

Pat Anderson - full frontal

Jeane Manson - one breast. For a much better look at Jeane, look down there in Catch o' the Day for some caps from The Young Nurses, a movie in which she bared all, front and rear.

Liv Lindeland shows some first-class breasts as the sexually frustrated wife of an elderly judge.

Katie Saylor strips down to have sex with ... Art Metrano, who plays Dirty O'Neil's partner.

Several women get naked in the showers and locker room. They play on a basketball team coached by Dirty O'Neil.

Two other members of that team, Tara Strohmeier and Kitty Carl, strip in front of a glass door to tease their neighbor.

Another woman comes out of a cake topless. Based on the credits, using the process of elimination, I suppose that she must be either Susan McIver or Linda Gold, but I can't pin it down more definitely.

  • * Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

  • * White asterisk: expanded format.

  • * Blue asterisk: not mine.

  • No asterisk: it probably sucks.


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Greta Scacchi


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