Three new junk films:
Into the Blue 2
Centered in Hawaii, Into the Blue 2 has nothing to do with its predecessor
other than that it's about a young man and woman who run diving excursions for
tourists and hunt for treasure in their spare time. It's a typical
made-for-cable-or-DVD flick with a boilerplate plot, generic one-dimensional
characters and unknown actors. It's like an episode of Hawaii 5-0, except padded
out to 90 minutes for no good reason. The extra running time consists of a
couple of scenes with undeveloped characters, the usual stock underwater shots,
various people playing beach volleyball, and some nudity.
Blah, blah, blah. International terrorists and arms dealers. Blah. blah, blah. Treasure
hunters. Blah. blah, blah. Gold doubloons ... sharks ... nuclear weapons ...
It sounds completely negative when I write it like that, but one must concede
that the film manages to entertain from time to time. The pacing is far too slow
during the first sixty minutes, which is when all the padding occurs, but there
are a few thrills once the plot starts to kick into gear. There are even some
surprises: one of the main sympathetic characters gets killed and one of the
baddies escapes, so the screenwriter at least showed a little chutzpah, al least
by straight-to-vid standards.
It's sad to report that this, although by-the-numbers, is the best of the three movies by far.
An uber-bitch sorority invites hopeful pledges to
amuse the current sisters with scary stories. The three stories are
pictorialized and there is also a framing story involving the sorority. Much of
the film was lensed at the Playboy mansion, and it stars some of Hef's favorites like Bridget Marquardt and Holly Madison. The girls can't act and
the script is just a dreadful recycling of ideas you've seen a million times
before. It's an utter waste of time, with nothing to please either gorehounds or
those who love a good campfire tale.
There is some nudity, as follows:
The Caretaker is a comedy/horror effort which is more or less a remake of
Hell Night. A bunch of guys get their dates into an old house and tell them scary
stories, which they have arranged to accompany with fake scares. Needless to
say, a real slasher shows up to spoil the fun, or add to it, depending on your
point of view.
Low-budget suckfest with guest appearances by Jennifer Tilly and Judd Nelson.
Somebody else did these film clips: