Tuna is off today, but will return tomorrow with more reviews and images!

Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

Curse of the Komodo (2003):

It's  another cinema classic from Brainscan's favorite director, Jim Wynorski. It's better to read this on the Movie House page, because the comments correspond to some pictures.

  • Glori-Anne Gilbert (1, 2, 3)




  • There are several new volumes in the I and J sections of the Encyclopedia. Those two letters are now completely finished, including celebrities with and without separate volumes. There are also a few other miscellaneous new volumes scattered throughout (in yellow). The most interesting is Caroline Dhavernas, who may be on the verge of stardom. Nobody in Hollywood really knows who she is because her filmography is filled with obscure non-Hollywood films, and you probably don't know her unless you were a fan of "Wonder Falls", but she has the right combination of ingredients for stardom. She comes from an acting family, is pretty, can look either wholesome or seductive, is completely fearless on screen, actually has some acting talent, and speaks two or more languages.  Her range of talent is quite similar to Kate Winslet's. You can think of her as Winslet without the weight problem, so with the right breaks, she could develop that kind of career. If the cult favorite series "Wonder Falls" had been loved by the general public as much as by its cult and the critics, her performance as Jaye Tyler might have made her "the next big thing", but it just didn't go down that way. I still think she's THIS close. She looks mighty good naked as well.



Some .wmv's:

  • Speaking of Winslet, two of her best: Titanic and Holy Smoke.
  • Two of the best from Jobeth Williams. Teachers, and Kramer vs Kramer. The video quality of the clip from Kramer is not very good, but if you haven't seen the scene, it's one of the greats! (You can find DVD caps in the Encyclopedia.)




Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the ones above, since it's sorta in real time.

Click here to submit a URL for Other Crap






Here are the latest movie reviews available at

  • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
  • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
  • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
  • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.


Words from Scoop.

.avi's from Shiloh.

.wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.



  • Great scene of Elizabeth Hurley rubbing an ice cube on herself to seduce Spicoli in The Weight of Water (.avi version.wmv version).

  • Euronudity legend Marushka Detmers in The Mambo Kings.  (.avi version.wmv version)

  • Greta Scacchi in Fires Within. (.avi version.wmv version)

  • Not too long ago IO was talking about gorgeous Suzy Amis in The Big Town, aka Chicago Blues, and I mentioned that her only real nudity was in The Ballad of Little Jo. Shiloh dug out the scene in question. Suzy doesn't act or model too much any more. She's pretty busy, what with raising her kids and - oh, yeah - being approximately the richest person in Hollywood and all (she's now Mrs. James Cameron) (.avi version.wmv version)


Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble with the codecs for these movies:

Shiloh says:

FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the vids says the video codec:  DivX Decoder Filter & audio codec:  Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with. When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG Layer-3.  A friend of mine told me about compressing the audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp & asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost too much to buy in my opinion.

A reader says:

You mentioned that some users were having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool designed to determine what codec is needed for a video. Hope this is useful to you or your users.

Scoop says:

I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9. The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly larger, and slightly lower quality.

Graphic Response
  • Rosanna Arquette looks gorgeous and shows all 3 B's in scenes from the Van Damme movie "Nowhere to Run" (1993).

  • Renée Soutendijk, topless and playing with a dude's "fun parts" in scenes from the Dutch film by Paul Verhoeven, "Spetters" (1980).

Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website.

'Caps and comments by Brainscan:

Hot Club California (1999) ia part Dumb and Dumber and part Midnight Tease. It goes like this: three sisters find a pile o' dirty money in an alley and run off to California to start a high-rent strip club. It helps that one of the sisters is a stripper (she is played by Tracy Ryan, aka Tracy Smith, formerly known as Avalon, a practioner of adult film arts) and a second is a strip club manager (that would be Amanda Prentice, cute as the dickens red-head). Sister number 3 is a straight-laced professional sort, played by Angela Davies. (Caps of her scenes I sent in a while back.)

So Westward Ho! Or, more properly, Westward Stripper! In California, they start the club, go through various trials and tribulations but wind up in the pink, as it were, as all the girls find guys and everyone is very happy in the end, so to speak.

This is exactly what you would expect. None of the dramatic moments will make you fugetabout The Sopranos and none of the romantic conflicts will bring up memories of Sex and the City. But those moments are not long, whereas the nekkid babe scenes are many and lengthy, even in the R-rated version I saw.

That raises a point. I've seen 'caps of one scene from the unrated version of this movie and it has way more full-frontal stuff and what looks to be seriously steamy girl-girl goings on between Tracy Ryan and veteran B-movie babe, Ava Lake (aka Mia Zotolli, aka Mia, aka Ava Niche). I also understand that the unrated version was released in 2000 on DVD, but for the life of me I cannot find a copy anywhere on the Web. So, kind and fellow reader of the Funhouse, if you know where I can acquire such a copy, please contact the Scoopsters.

The exposure. Lots of crossover pornabies. Two collages of Tracy Ryan dancing. She is impressively built. One of former adult star Jamie Lynn showing hooters and bum. And one of Dee Summers, who appears to have been cast in every movie with the word, Sista, in its title.

Then there are the B-movie babes. Amanda Prentice does a nice sport-hump scene. And Ava Lake dances topless, in the days before an elementary school globe of the world was cut in half and shoved under the skin of her chest.

Former Hefmate Katie Lohmann also plays a stripper and I sent in caps of her scenes last Christmas. You can see her again in the upper right part of Jamie Lynn's collage.

And you can see her again right now (how's that for a classy segue) in caps from Dead Sexy. Lots of el primo artists have capped this movie and there is so much to cap. I concentrated on Katie's dark standup-humpin' scene. Obsessions being what they are, I grabbed dozens of frames from this long scene and stuck them together in nine collages. Robo-hooters in them all, Full-frontal in collages 3, 4, 5, 7 and 8.

I like Katie. She's one Heffer who we can count on to give up serious goodies as often as possible and that makes her kinda special, ya know.

On the other end of the Heffer spectrum is Carrie Jean Yazel. Girl had one kick-ass body... probably still does... but she showed only bits and pieces of it in a couple of movies. Here she is the Tom Selleck comedy, Mr. Baseball. Tom wakes up next to her in a dorm room full of gals... before he is shipped to Japan. The first collage shows a sequence of shots, whereas the only frame with something resembling a bare breast is blown up in the second. Carrie, Carrie, Carrie, with such fine advertising, who could have guessed you wouldn't deliver the goods.

  • Carrie Jean Yazel (1, 2)

'Caps and comments by Dann:

"A Walk on the Moon"
This 1999 romantic drama, set in 1969, tells of a middle-class Jewish housewife, on vacation in the Catskills, who finds herself doing the unthinkable, having an affair with a traveling blouse salesman. No new ground broken here.

This isn't a bad movie, competently acted with some interesting characters, but it's something you'd more likely expect to see on afternoon TV or Lifetime. A chick flick, really, not so different from Unfaithful which Diane Lane did later it will probably leave most general audiences yawning. Incidentially, they got Woodstock wrong, because the place was wall-to-wall mud and rain, and not the beautiful green pastures and blue skies they showed.

Edie Falco
Drea De Matteo

A few 'caps from "The Sopranos". With Falco, the cleavage is real, but the "nude bum in the moonlight" scene is probably a body double. If you want to see a video clip of this scene, check out the April 12 issue in the Daily Archives. De Matteo shows some serious cleavage.

Alice Arno
(1, 2, 3, 4)
Diane Lepvrier

Both actresses bare all in scenes from "Justine de Sade" (1972).

First up from Flautista...a bunch of nekkid Spanish babes in scenes from the movie "Lisístrata" (2002).

Next up, highlights from another Spanish movie, "Días de fútbol" (2003).

Jumping back across the pond for some good ol' fashioned American nudity.

  • Holly Hunter, topless and showing some pubes in scenes from "Thirteen".

  • Skinemax babe Kimberly Rowe shows breasts and thong views in scenes from "Knocking on Death's Door" (1999).

Wendy Lyon
(1, 2)

Full frontal and dorsal nudity, plus a Daryl Hannah from "Splash" hair-do in scenes from "Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night II" (1987). 'Caps by Kitt.

Isabelle Adjani
(1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

Señor Skin 'caps of the French actress looking lovely in topless scenes from "Quartet" (1981).

Pat Reeder
Pat's comments in yellow...

She's A Maniac! - Jennifer Beals set the biggest fashion trend of the '80s in "Flashdance" by wearing a sweatshirt with a ripped neckline that hung over her shoulder. Now, she has revealed that it was just a "laundry mistake." She said it was her own shirt that she left in the dryer too long until the neck hole shrank so much, she couldn't get her head through it. So she cut the hole to make it bigger, never expecting it to make such an impact.

  • It made her so famous, she got a really big head and had to cut her neck hole again.
  • This also started the trend of performers wearing clothes that are three sizes too small.
  • We seem to owe all our pop culture landmarks to wardrobe malfunctions.
  • Shrinkage is also how Britney Spears' pants got so low.

    Hoover Didn't Suck? - Richard Hack spent 20 years researching former FBI boss J. Edgar Hoover for his new book "Puppetmaster," and he claims much of what we believe about Hoover isn't true. He says Hoover was not a cross-dresser nor gay, and he didn't have a sexual relationship with his aide, Clyde Tolson. But he did have a lifelong affair with "Road" movie star, Dorothy Lamour. And while claiming he only looked at porn so he could fight it, he personally kept nude photos of Marilyn Monroe and Eleanor Roosevelt. W.C. Fields owned the purported Roosevelt photos, and when Hoover asked to see them, Fields sent them to him.

  • Hoover used them to torture commies into confessing.
  • Nothing motivates a man to fight porn like nude photos of Eleanor Roosevelt.
  • Let's pray Eleanor's ghost never advises Hillary Clinton to pose nude.
  • He kept nude photos of Eleanor Roosevelt?!...I miss the good old days, when I thought he was just a normal gay crossdresser.
  • Is he sure Hoover didn't just date Dorothy Lamour so he could borrow her sarongs?

    And We're Offended By Janet Jackson? - The G&L Garden Center in Hartsville, Tennessee, had a unique response to complaints that their classical nude garden statues were obscene. They put little bikini tops and sarong bottoms on the statues of nude women. It's actually boosted business: six of the $99.95 statues have sold in the past couple of weeks, and lots of people are stopping. One woman said her husband saw the bikinis on the nude statues and had to check it out. And some customers are pulling on the tops and peeking underneath to see what they're hiding.

  • Nothing but breasts made of concrete, just like Pamela Anderson's.
  • Under the bikini tops, they're wearing solar-shaped nipple medallions.
  • They've renamed it the "T&A Garden Center."

    Martha Stewart Suggests Calligraphy - Chris Goran of Wellington, Ohio, got flak over a window display she put up for her video and printing store, Special Effects. It showed beer cans on the floor, an overturned table and dangling legs, to look like someone had hanged himself. On the table were two suicide notes: one scrawled and one beautifully printed, with a sign reading, "Contemplating suicide? Let Special Effects give your suicide note that professional look." Suicide prevention officials howled, but Goran said most customers think it's funny.

  • They just DIE laughing!
  • Besides, her suicide note business has tripled.
  • After all, you only get one chance to leave a last impression.
  • If she gets too much grief over this, she'll just end it all.