Tuna is off today, but will return tomorrow with more reviews and images!
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
Curse of the Komodo (2003):
It's another cinema classic from Brainscan's favorite
director, Jim Wynorski. It's better to read this on
the Movie House
page, because the comments correspond to some pictures.
- Glori-Anne Gilbert (1,
- There are several new volumes in the I and J sections of the
Encyclopedia. Those two letters are now completely finished,
including celebrities with and without separate volumes. There are
also a few other miscellaneous new volumes scattered throughout
(in yellow). The most interesting is Caroline Dhavernas, who may
be on the verge of stardom. Nobody in Hollywood really knows who
she is because her filmography is filled with obscure
non-Hollywood films, and you probably don't know her unless you
were a fan of "Wonder Falls", but she has the right combination of
ingredients for stardom. She comes from an acting family, is
pretty, can look either wholesome or seductive, is completely
fearless on screen, actually has some acting talent, and speaks
two or more languages. Her range of talent is quite similar
to Kate Winslet's. You can think of her as Winslet without the
weight problem, so with the right breaks, she could develop that
kind of career. If the cult favorite series "Wonder Falls" had
been loved by the general public as much as by its cult and the
critics, her performance as Jaye Tyler might have made her "the
next big thing", but it just didn't go down that way. I still
think she's THIS close. She looks mighty good naked as well.
- Speaking of Winslet, two of her best: Titanic and Holy Smoke.
- Two of the best from Jobeth Williams. Teachers, and Kramer vs
Kramer. The video quality of the clip from Kramer is not very
good, but if you haven't seen the scene, it's one of the greats!
(You can find DVD caps in the Encyclopedia.)
Hawaiian intrastate flights are weighted down by omnipresent
doughnuts, and possibly tribbles.
Complete transcript of President Bush's press conference
Will California allow people with multiple personalities to use
the carpool lanes? Well, almost.
Rare 1611 edition of 'Hamlet' to be sold, or not to be..
It was printed while Shakespeare was still alive.
Wearing Underoos is fun.
Mike Piazza is engaged to a former Playmate. (Story
only. See link below for pics.)
- Here is a free nude gallery of pictures of Mike Piazza's new
Alicia Rickter, playmate of the month in
October of 1995, courtesy of PlayboyPlus.com!
The Transcript of today's 9/11 Commission Hearing.
Bottom line: Ashcroft says the towers would still be standing, and
life in America would now be exactly like heaven in that movie
with Cuba Gooding and Robin Williams, if only Bill Clinton had
been screwing terrorists instead of interns.
- A clip and the trailer from
Anchorman - the legend of Ron Burgundy
- Looking to make your house a little different? Bring in a
designer who knows
MoCoLoco - the theory of modern contemporary design & architecture.
I know it doesn't seem possible, but the language of modern design
may possibly be more pretentious than that of wine snobbery. A
sample: "Sculptural light.
A thousand luminous dots replace the traditional lamps. The first
two lights, Airco and Biodomestic, are available now whereas Flat
and Lily d’Eau will be developed further and will follow soon." No
wonder I make so many typos in this blog. My light is, like,
totally unsculptural, dude.
The Daily Show looks at Condi Rice's testimony.
Masculout - the protein cleaner
L.A. Home Prices Soar at Record Rate: "Home values in
Los Angeles County posted the biggest year-over-year increase in
at least 15 years in March as frenetic buying activity pushed the
median sale price up 29%, to a record $375,000, according to data
released Monday. "
First images from The Bourne Supremacy
The Men Commandments
- The new trailer for
- According to Borowitz:
BUSH MISSED BILLBOARD OF OSAMA 60-Foot-Tall Sign
Appeared Outside the White House in August 2001, featuring bin
Laden’s stern visage and the words “I AM GOING TO HIJACK U.S.
AIRPLANES VERY SOON”
Inventor of ubiquitous time-weather sign dies Monday at 12:14,
Mr Puniverse - the search for the puniest man - has a new
Nader tells youths to brace for draft: "Presidential
candidate Ralph Nader this weekend warned his constituents that a
military draft is pending, and asked younger voters to prepare. "
- Drudge says:
"Campaign 2004 turns extreme in Florida with the placement of a
newspaper ad calling for physical retribution against Donald
Celebs Write Their Own Epitaphs: For his latest book,
'Remember Me When I'm Gone,' Larry King asked more than 300
celebrities how they would like to be remembered after their
death. I suppose his own stone should read --- Larry King
Enya joins heavy metal band, but promises her fans that
her music will continue to sound like the soundtrack for a Cate
Happy Birthday, Tom Jefferson - 'Jefferson Muzzles' awards mark
affronts to free speech: 13 cited for egregious bids to
Shock jocks go silent; cartoons clean up. A single knocker causes
a cultural crackdown.
Would you upset an alligator named Mister Cranky Pants? Some
thieves chanced it, but apparently soon regretted it.
"Of Flesh and Stone - Mortality, Death, Salvation & Transcendence"
- Naked women on headstones.
Elisha Cuthbert said she persuaded director Luke Greenfield to
take her nude scenes out of The Girl Next Door, saying they
weren't necessary for the character. She also vowed
that she will never play a nude scene in a movie. The film opened
in tenth place, despite a strong marketing push.
Catastrophe Calculator: Estimate Asteroid Impact Effects Online
Here is the actual asteroid impact calculator
A virtual golf game so accurate it improves your real game.
The United States Basketball League, Inc. (USBL) in conjunction
with the Oklahoma Storm have announced the signing of Former NBA
All-Star Shawn Kemp
National champion archer only uses one arm. And he can
jerk off at the same time.
The Atlanta Hawks apologized Monday for playing a hip-hop song
that contains obscenities and other graphic language on 'Family
Night.' They could have mentioned that it was a night
for the family of DMX, and maybe the Manson Family.
Serena Williams fits those mammoth things into a see-through
Albatross sues Mickelson for breach of contract.
A bar where everybody knows his sports.
Baseball Misery Index. You think your team has
problems? Imagine being an Expos fan.
Fast-food loving Miss Missouri crowned Miss USA.
Tycoon buys a London House for $128 million.
- Nine additional clips for
Porn attracts serious pupils. I wish I could have
padded out my schedule with Porn 101 instead of that crap like
Fantastic Four casting rumors.
- Four free videos from
Playboy's Cheerleaders & College Girls!
- Brooke Richards was the Playmate of the Month in December
1999. Here is her free, nude
playmate gallery, courtesy of PlayboyPlus.com!
Bex sex babe bares all for The Sun
Looks like Beckham bent her backwards.
The ORIGINAL Illustrated Catalog Of ACME Products.
Accept no substitutes.
This is an amazingly insightful quiz that you should take at work.
Will Consumer Spending Remain Strong? Consumers give
off mixed signals: consumer confidence increases slightly but
spending intentions drop.
Ron's Misfits of Science Website.
- From the submitter: "Perhaps the rest of the world won't
find this half as cool as I did, but here's the best of several
web pages dedicated to the failed, mid-80s TV series "Misfits of
Science," which was Courtney Cox's first regular TV role. The
show didn't quite last a full season, but I always suspected it
had something of an understated cult following. A couple of days
ago, I entered the show into a Yahoo! search just to see, and
was amazed at the number of returns. Either I was right about
that following, or this is just another case of the internet
being a place where one's fleeting thought is another's
obsession.... There's even
a band out there which has adopted the name and
graphics from the show. Anyway, the page is complete with photos
and audio clips, including both the opening montage and
"full-length" versions of the theme song. Somebody got a lot of
milage out of one TVLand rerun.
archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
to submit a URL for Other Crap
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
Words from Scoop.
.avi's from Shiloh.
.wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.
Great scene of Elizabeth Hurley rubbing an ice cube
on herself to seduce Spicoli in The Weight of Water (.avi version, .wmv version).
Euronudity legend Marushka Detmers in The Mambo
Kings. (.avi version, .wmv version)
Greta Scacchi in Fires Within. (.avi version,
Not too long ago IO was talking about gorgeous Suzy
Amis in The Big Town, aka Chicago Blues, and I mentioned that her
only real nudity was in The Ballad of Little Jo. Shiloh dug out the
scene in question. Suzy doesn't act or model too much any more.
She's pretty busy, what with raising her kids and - oh, yeah - being
approximately the richest person in Hollywood and all (she's now
Mrs. James Cameron) (.avi version, .wmv version)
Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble
with the codecs for these movies:
FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use
DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use
virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the
vids says the video codec: DivX Decoder Filter & audio
codec: Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with.
When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG
Layer-3. A friend of mine told me about compressing the
audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been
capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this
info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp &
asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using
camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could
never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost
too much to buy in my opinion.
A reader says:
You mentioned that some users were
having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool
designed to determine what codec is needed for a video.
http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you
or your users.
I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9.
The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in
the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly
larger, and slightly lower quality.
- Rosanna Arquette looks gorgeous and shows all 3 B's in scenes from the Van Damme movie "Nowhere to Run" (1993).
- Renée Soutendijk, topless and playing with a dude's "fun parts" in scenes from the Dutch film by Paul Verhoeven, "Spetters" (1980).
Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website. www.graphic-barry.com.
'Caps and comments by Brainscan:
Hot Club California (1999) ia part Dumb and Dumber and
part Midnight Tease. It goes like this: three
sisters find a pile o' dirty money in an alley and run
off to California to start a high-rent strip club. It
helps that one of the sisters is a stripper (she is
played by Tracy Ryan, aka Tracy Smith, formerly known
as Avalon, a practioner of adult film arts) and a
second is a strip club manager (that would be Amanda
Prentice, cute as the dickens red-head). Sister
number 3 is a straight-laced professional sort, played
by Angela Davies. (Caps of her scenes I sent in a
So Westward Ho! Or, more properly, Westward Stripper!
In California, they start the club, go through
various trials and tribulations but wind up in the
pink, as it were, as all the girls find guys and
everyone is very happy in the end, so to speak.
This is exactly what you would expect. None of the
dramatic moments will make you fugetabout The Sopranos
and none of the romantic conflicts will bring up
memories of Sex and the City. But those moments are
not long, whereas the nekkid babe scenes are many and
lengthy, even in the R-rated version I saw.
That raises a point. I've seen 'caps of one scene from
the unrated version of this movie and it has way more
full-frontal stuff and what looks to be seriously
steamy girl-girl goings on between Tracy Ryan and
veteran B-movie babe, Ava Lake (aka Mia Zotolli, aka
Mia, aka Ava Niche). I also understand that the
unrated version was released in 2000 on DVD, but for
the life of me I cannot find a copy anywhere on the
Web. So, kind and fellow reader of the Funhouse, if
you know where I can acquire such a copy, please
contact the Scoopsters.
The exposure. Lots of crossover pornabies. Two
collages of Tracy Ryan dancing. She is impressively
built. One of former adult star Jamie Lynn showing
hooters and bum. And one of Dee Summers, who appears
to have been cast in every movie with the word, Sista,
in its title.
Then there are the B-movie babes. Amanda Prentice
does a nice sport-hump scene. And Ava Lake dances
topless, in the days before an elementary school globe
of the world was cut in half and shoved under the skin
of her chest.
Former Hefmate Katie Lohmann also plays a stripper and
I sent in caps of her scenes last Christmas. You can
see her again in the upper right part of Jamie Lynn's
And you can see her again right now (how's that for a
classy segue) in caps from Dead Sexy. Lots of el
primo artists have capped this movie and there is so
much to cap. I concentrated on Katie's dark
standup-humpin' scene. Obsessions being what they
are, I grabbed dozens of frames from this long scene
and stuck them together in nine collages.
Robo-hooters in them all, Full-frontal in collages 3,
4, 5, 7 and 8.
I like Katie. She's one Heffer who we can count on to
give up serious goodies as often as possible and that
makes her kinda special, ya know.
On the other end of the Heffer spectrum is Carrie Jean
Yazel. Girl had one kick-ass body... probably still
does... but she showed only bits and pieces of it in a
couple of movies. Here she is the Tom Selleck comedy,
Mr. Baseball. Tom wakes up next to her in a dorm room
full of gals... before he is shipped to Japan. The
first collage shows a sequence of shots, whereas the
only frame with something resembling a bare breast is
blown up in the second. Carrie, Carrie, Carrie, with
such fine advertising, who could have guessed you
wouldn't deliver the goods.
'Caps and comments by Dann:
"A Walk on the Moon"
This 1999 romantic drama, set in 1969, tells of a middle-class Jewish housewife, on vacation in the Catskills, who finds herself doing the unthinkable, having an affair with a traveling blouse salesman. No new ground broken here.
This isn't a bad movie, competently acted with some interesting characters, but it's something you'd more likely expect to see on afternoon TV or Lifetime. A chick flick, really, not so different from Unfaithful which Diane Lane did later it will probably leave most general audiences yawning. Incidentially, they got Woodstock wrong, because the place was wall-to-wall mud and rain, and not the beautiful green pastures and blue skies they showed.
Drea De Matteo
|A few 'caps from "The Sopranos". With Falco, the cleavage is real, but the "nude bum in the moonlight" scene is probably a body double. If you want to see a video clip of this scene, check out the April 12 issue in the Daily Archives. De Matteo shows some serious cleavage.
|Both actresses bare all in scenes from "Justine de Sade" (1972).
First up from Flautista...a bunch of nekkid Spanish babes in scenes from the movie "Lisístrata" (2002).
Next up, highlights from another Spanish movie, "Días de fútbol" (2003).
Jumping back across the pond for some good ol' fashioned American nudity.
- Holly Hunter, topless and showing some pubes in scenes from "Thirteen".
- Skinemax babe Kimberly Rowe shows breasts and thong views in scenes from "Knocking on Death's Door" (1999).
|Full frontal and dorsal nudity, plus a Daryl Hannah from "Splash" hair-do in scenes from "Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night II" (1987). 'Caps by Kitt.
|Señor Skin 'caps of the French actress looking lovely in topless scenes from "Quartet" (1981).
|Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
Pat's comments in yellow...
"FLASHDANCE" FASHION CRAZE A LAUNDRY MISTAKE
She's A Maniac! - Jennifer Beals set the biggest fashion trend of the '80s
in "Flashdance" by wearing a sweatshirt with a ripped neckline that hung
over her shoulder. Now, she has revealed that it was just a "laundry
mistake." She said it was her own shirt that she left in the dryer too
long until the neck hole shrank so much, she couldn't get her head through
it. So she cut the hole to make it bigger, never expecting it to make such
It made her so famous, she got a really big head and had to cut her neck
This also started the trend of performers wearing clothes that are three
sizes too small.
We seem to owe all our pop culture landmarks to wardrobe malfunctions.
Shrinkage is also how Britney Spears' pants got so low.
EVERYTHING YOU KNOW ABOUT J. EDGAR HOOVER IS WRONG
Hoover Didn't Suck? - Richard Hack spent 20 years researching former FBI
boss J. Edgar Hoover for his new book "Puppetmaster," and he claims much of
what we believe about Hoover isn't true. He says Hoover was not a
cross-dresser nor gay, and he didn't have a sexual relationship with his
aide, Clyde Tolson. But he did have a lifelong affair with "Road" movie
star, Dorothy Lamour. And while claiming he only looked at porn so he
could fight it, he personally kept nude photos of Marilyn Monroe and
Eleanor Roosevelt. W.C. Fields owned the purported Roosevelt photos, and
when Hoover asked to see them, Fields sent them to him.
Hoover used them to torture commies into confessing.
Nothing motivates a man to fight porn like nude photos of Eleanor
Let's pray Eleanor's ghost never advises Hillary Clinton to pose nude.
He kept nude photos of Eleanor Roosevelt?!...I miss the good old days,
when I thought he was just a normal gay crossdresser.
Is he sure Hoover didn't just date Dorothy Lamour so he could borrow her
NUDE GARDEN STATUES GET BIKINIS
And We're Offended By Janet Jackson? - The G&L Garden Center in Hartsville,
Tennessee, had a unique response to complaints that their classical nude
garden statues were obscene. They put little bikini tops and sarong
bottoms on the statues of nude women. It's actually boosted business: six
of the $99.95 statues have sold in the past couple of weeks, and lots of
people are stopping. One woman said her husband saw the bikinis on the
nude statues and had to check it out. And some customers are pulling on
the tops and peeking underneath to see what they're hiding.
Nothing but breasts made of concrete, just like Pamela Anderson's.
Under the bikini tops, they're wearing solar-shaped nipple medallions.
They've renamed it the "T&A Garden Center."
GET YOUR SUICIDE NOTE PRINTED PROFESSIONALLY
Martha Stewart Suggests Calligraphy - Chris Goran of Wellington, Ohio, got
flak over a window display she put up for her video and printing store,
Special Effects. It showed beer cans on the floor, an overturned table and
dangling legs, to look like someone had hanged himself. On the table were
two suicide notes: one scrawled and one beautifully printed, with a sign
reading, "Contemplating suicide? Let Special Effects give your suicide
note that professional look." Suicide prevention officials howled, but
Goran said most customers think it's funny.
They just DIE laughing!
Besides, her suicide note business has tripled.
After all, you only get one chance to leave a last impression.
If she gets too much grief over this, she'll just end it all.