Contact junior by writing firstname.lastname@example.org. Contact Scoopy by writing email@example.com. Contact Tuna by writing firstname.lastname@example.org Send submissions to email@example.com
Use this search device to seek additional information from amazon.com about any of the books or movies you read about here.
To see and use all the Funhouse features, you need Netscape 6.+ or MSIE 5.+.
"Devil in the Flesh II"
Devil in the Flesh II (2000) is a Canadian made sequel to a weak original thriller, and follows the normal sequel rules by leaving off where the last one stopped, leaving room for another sequel at the end, upping the nudity and gore/violence, and putting me to sleep. In this one, Jodi Lyn O'Keefe breaks out of a mental hospital, killing a nurse and her doctor, assumes the identity of a girl who picks her up on the road then dies, and starts college, with none other than her flame from the first film on the faculty. She basically seduces him, and does in anyone in her way. The professor, for his part, had my head moving like a ping pong match as he bounced between his pregnant girlfriend (Katherine Kendall ) and O'Keefe. O'Keefe is careful to not show any skin. Kendall shows breasts in a very tame sex scene, and an unknown woman shows breasts and buns in a totally gratuitous sex scene near the beginning.
IMDB readers say 4.1 of 10, and Apollo has it at 56. To me, a thriller should get your adrenaline going at least enough to keep you awake, and this one failed that test. Most of the plot is predictable, and the characters actions are not very realistic. Performances are ok, and the production values, other than F/X, were not bad. This is a low C-.
Fires Within (1991), which IMDB calls Little Havana is really a love triangle, with a backdrop of the Cuban community in Florida. Greta Scacchi and Jimmy Smits were married in Cuba, and had a daughter. Scacchi is a school teacher, who wants nothing more than to protect her family, while Smits is a highly principled writer who becomes an activist against the Castro regime. He is arrested and sentenced to 20 years. When they offer him release if he signs a loyalty oath and recants his anti-government stance, he prefers to spend the rest of his time in solitary and away from his wife and daughter. Scacchi and their daughter escape to Florida, and settle in Little Havana.
Cut to seven years later, and Smits has been released from prison and allowed to leave Cuba. While he was gone, Scacchi has taken a few jobs, and had an ongoing affair with the owner of the boat that rescued her during the escape. Now she and the daughter must choose between the two men. Smits is encouraged to become an activist in Little Havana, and is something of a local hero. Scacchi sees history repeating itself, so we have two conflicts set up. Who will Scacchi end up with, and will Smits choose his cause or his family?
The film is beautifully photographed mainly in a very colorful Little Havana, and we get a feel for what it is like when your family members are political prisoners, or are still living under an oppressive dictatorship. The performances are adequate, but the story didn't have near the power and dramatic impact it could have. Scacchi shows breasts and buns in flashback sequences. IMDB readers say 5.8 of 10. I am not sure this Indie ever had a theatrical release, and there are no reviews of note on line. I found it rather lukewarm, and can give it no more than a C. The concept had merit, but the script was way under-written, giving the film no chance.
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
Serendipity is another
formulaic romantic comedy from the big Hollywood Dream Factory. It has one of
the dumbest, tritest scripts ever written, but also has at least three
good performers who
play it well (Jeremy Piven, John Cusack, Eugene Levy) - ALMOST well enough to
make it convincing. Cusack needs to get back to his roots and away from this
Hollywood Pablum. No nudity.
No Man's Land is the blackly comedic anti-war film that won the best foreign
film Oscar, in a major upset over the heavily favored Amelie. The
director's acceptance speech was perhaps more touching than the film
itself in the way it demonstrated what a different world this film and
its director inhabit from the one we know. The film's approach
certainly demonstrates the difference between Hollywood and Bosnia,
but his appearance at the trite ceremony heightened our awareness still further. He
loped to the podium without a shred of poise; he hunched over the mike
while he muttered in incomprehensible English, and he came to the
glamorous Oscar night in a suit that looked like he got it from
Goodwill. It appeared that the total amount of money this man has had
in his life wouldn't pay for one of Tom Cruise's haircuts. My daughter and I
laughed out loud (Ok, cruelly, I admit) as the guy approached the podium, but
my wife (who was born and educated in Eastern Europe) didn't see the humor. I
think she thought he was kinda stylish by the standards of the former Soviet
Bloc. Or maybe she was in shock at the sight of an Eastern European guy without
an oversized hat.
In a pointed yet strangely endearing way, he managed to open our
eyes for a few minutes and made us realize that the celebrity gossip
and fashion talk that dominates Oscar night is just the empty,
superficial part of filmmaking. This poor penniless shlub threw his
heart and soul on film in a representation of the absurd and forlorn
state of his war-torn homeland, which was once so serene and
breathtaking, and he did an excellent job.
Helluva screenplay. If Jonathan Swift can read it from wherever he is
now, he is nodding in approval.
can read Bosnian.
Unfortunately, no nudity.
Under the Skin
is the gritty cinema verite film that brought Samantha Morton to the
world's attention. This film is one of those dreary looks at a life in
disintegration. When their aging mum passes on, two English sisters react in
very different ways. One externalizes her grief, cries it out, and moves on
with life in a normal way. The other sister doesn't seem to manifest any grief
at all, even seems to mock her sister for her emotional weakness, but under the
skin she undergoes a personality transformation, and she descends into a
dizzying spiral of drugs and sex.
I think that there are two elements for which the movie may be
recommended: (1) A close-to-the-bone performance from 20 year old
Samantha Morton, who won several awards for this performance .(2) The
dizzying spiral of sex is portrayed graphically, through the mind of
the female participant. we hear her thoughts during sex. we hear her
engaged in phone sex. We hear her graphic recollections of sexual
experiences. And we see much of what transpires.
But I gotta say
that after an economical 85 minutes of running time, I was more than ready for
this to be over, because it doesn't really go anywhere.
- Samantha Morton
Ruthless People was covered by Tuna last week, and I don't really have
much to add to his comments. It's a reasonably well paced black comedy about
a guy who refuses to pay a ransom demand because he wants his wife to die,
the plot thickened by several twists and misunderstandings among the
- Jeannine Bisignano
Who is Thora Birch's mom? Revealed in this week's Star:
Do you remember the controversy about Thora Birch's nude scene in American
Beauty? Because she was 17 at the time, her parents were on the set,
accompanied by an official from the State of California who was entrusted with
the responsibility to see that she was not an exploited minor.
controversial, but how much MORE controversy would there have been if we had
known that Thora Birch's mom, the lady who gave permission for the nude scene,
was in fact quite an expert on the subject? The Star reports in its April 23rd
edition that Thora's mom, Carol Birch, is actually Carol Connors, the famed
70's porn star from such unforgettable classics as Deep Throat and Candy Goes
to Hollywood. See many samples of mom's technique in the Tuna archives under
Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded
into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that I inexplicably determined
there might be something of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or
Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.
A little "Hankster Lite" today...
Here is the beautiful, blonde, former Miss New York, Miss Hawaiian Tropic, and 2nd runner-up to Miss Pennsylvania, Jennifer Gareis in scenes from, "Luckytown Blues".
- Jennifer working the brass pole. Great thong view in #2.
- Jennifer having sex on the pool table. No nudity.
- A nice 'cap o' cleavage.
- Finally revealing the goods!
|The former dude demonstrates the wonders of modern medicine and cosmetic surgery with topless and frontal nudity in scenes from the Pedro Almodóvar movie "Kika".
||Topless as the title character in "Kika".
|Cécile De France
||Topless in scenes from the French movie "L'Art (délicat) de la séduction" (2001). Thanks to Helvete.
||All 3 B's in scenes from the Czech film "Paralelní svety" aka "Les Mondes parallèles" aka "Parallel Worlds" (2001).
|Sexy non-nudes of the blonde German babe by Primal. Most likely from some kind of FHM or Maxim mag.
|Pat Reeder The Comedy Wire
Pat's comments in yellow...
Now, I understand why Madonna was so upset about those nude paintings. She looks like a shar-pei!
Click Here for photos of those nude portraits of Madonna, and an article from BBC news.
I guess you heard that Halle Berry got some shrapnel in her eye while
shooting a scene for the new 007 movie, but she'll be okay. Her breasts
emerged unscathed, so thank God it wasn't career-threatening. Now here are
a few items from IMDB, the first from a guy who is taking religion much too
seriously. Because he's a Catholic, he won't even shoot a pretend sex
scene with Ashley Judd. This explains why nobody in Italy has a
Caviezel Refused To Get Naked With Ashley Judd
Staunchly Catholic Hollywood actor Jim Caviezel refused to strip off for a
sex scene with beautiful actress Ashley Judd. The 33-year-old star
threatened to walk out unless director Carl Franklin shot the scene for
thriller High Crimes with both parties wearing clothes. He says, "I told
Carl, 'It's no problem, I don't have to do this movie. Go ahead and find
someone else.' I see our culture as not respecting people too much,
treating people like objects. There are times where sex is appropriate, but
I've yet to see butts and breasts act themselves out of a scene!" It's not
the first time Caviezel has refused to get naked for scenes with beautiful
co-stars. He refused to film a love scene with sexy Jennifer Lopez in Angel
Eyes because she was topless and asked rising star Dagmara Domincyzk to
cover her nipples while shooting The Count Of Monte Cristo. The married
star says, "My acting stems from inside, from God. And that's the only way
I can act. If I violate that, then I don't think I'd be around this
business much longer."
Next up, James King gives us a behind-the-scenes peek at the shooting of movie sex scenes. It ain't a pretty picture...
James King's Hilarious Sex Scenes
Stunning Pearl Harbor star James King had to hold back the giggles while
romping with co-stars in her recent box office bomb Slackers. The
model-turned-actress, 22, finds it hilarious to act out sex scenes in the
movie, which co-stars Devon Sawa and Jason Schwartzman. The blonde beauty
says, "There are about a hundred people sitting there watching you and
you're having sex with this guy and he's wearing a thong. You're trying not
to laugh your ass off. You're licking his face and he's licking yours, and
it's so gross and so nasty, but it's funny too. It's so outrageous,
especially when you think 'This is my life; I'm getting paid to have sex
with a guy in a thong!'"
Next, dim the lights in the Funhouse: Jamie Lee Curtis has decided to keep 'em covered up from here on out...
Jamie Lee Covers Up
Lusty fans of Jamie Lee Curtis won't be seeing the leggy actress in any
more saucy movies - she has become a prude. Curtis became Lady Hayden-Guest
when her English husband, wacky movie maker Christopher Guest, inherited
his father's noble title, and she's learned what it takes to be a real
lady. Jamie always considers her children when accepting parts - because
she doesn't want to embarrass them. She says, "I just don't want the
scrutiny. I'm not interested in the telephotoness (sic) of everyone's eyes.
I'm very chaste, for someone who dances around in her underwear in movies.
I go to the edge of the pool in a sarong and a shirt and I take them off
and I swim. I also choose to walk around in my private life in chaste
clothing. I don't wear tank tops or shorts. I wear dark clothing and
longsleeved shirts and skirts to my knee. It's about an appropriateness and
an inappropriateness and I'm sure we all know what that line is."
|Other Celeb News
From the Shipper Report...
* HAIRLESS ROSIE WAS A SCHOOL FREAK
Actress ROSIE PEREZ is having the last laugh on the teenagers who made her school life hell - she never needs to wax. The Latino PERDITA DURANGO star was picked on at school because she had no pubic hair - and she used to pray for proper puberty.
She says, "I had these humungous breasts and no hair. I had like three hairs and that was it. It was so humiliating. The kids used to catch me in the shower and say, 'No hair, no hair, no hair.' "But now I only have to shave three times a year and shave my armpits once a month. I don't have to do all the waxing. I just put on the bikini and I'm good to go."