In Tranzit



Immediately after German surrender in WW2, Russia had too many German POWs and not enough facilities to house them, nor personnel to process them. The captured Germans were thus dispatched to whatever makeshift accommodations might be remotely suitable for the task. In this case, 51 Germans were shipped to an empty Russian woman's prison which was staffed by an all-female skeleton crew. The assignment of those prisoners to that location was probably intentional, a scheme by a crafty KGB colonel to use the sexier female staffers to extract information from the prisoners in whatever manner might be effective. (Nudge-nudge, wink-wink.) The stakes were higher than first assumed by the women, because among the scruffy, rag-tag band of Germans were several high-ranking SS officers who would not be mere prisoners of war, but rather war criminals to be publicly hanged. The colonel places his strongest hopes on the camp's doctor, a sexy redhead whose feminine charms are familiar to him personally, having been exchanged for a promise to allow her brain-damaged husband to stay in the camp rather than to be shipped to a sanitarium.

I learned an important historical lesson from this film. Who could have guessed that being a prisoner of war in Russia was so sweet? By the end of the film, these prisoners were holding mixers with the local women, playing musical instruments, wearing new clothing, and getting laid more than Hugh Hefner. All of those Germans who rushed to the western front at the last minute so they could surrender to the British and Americans were such fools. The eastern front was where it was at! Life in the Russian POW camps was like going to Club Med, except colder. Damn, I wish I could have been a prisoner of war in Russia! Their lives were so much better than being a webmaster and movie reviewer. 

That wasn't the only element of the story that was less than convincing. When the prisoners are first transported to the camp, four or five women with rifles have absolutely no trouble maintaining control over 50 battle-hardened Germans. Soon, the doctor is examining each patient privately, with no armed guard to protect her. It's not just those sorts of details that seem unrealistic. There are also problems with the film's internal logic. The incredibly evil guy is eventually outed, but earlier in the film he says to another guy, in order to secure his conspiratorial silence, "Remember, Max, I know who you are and what you did." He says this when they are alone together, so it obviously means that Max really does have some awful secrets of his own. But when the Russians finally arrest Max, they end up letting him go back to the camp, and thence back to Germany. So are we to assume the Russians just gave people the benefit of the doubt? Hell, not only did the Russians not exercise such generosity with their enemies, they didn't even treat their allies and their own soldiers that well!

There are also several moments in the film that are not developed or supported by earlier events. For example, there is a point where the bad Nazi is just about to kill the good Nazi while the KGB officer is driving toward their location, too far away to prevent it. Suddenly, the sexy camp doctor (who fell in love with the good Nazi), comes out of nowhere and jumps the bad guy from behind. Besides the fact that it's hackneyed scripting and an obvious deus ex machina, there are two major problems with that: (1) She was farther away than the KGB guy, and she was on foot while he was driving. How did she get there before him? (2) She could have had no way to know where the two Nazis were in the first place. The KGB guy only knew because the doctor's crazy husband saw where they were heading and told KGB. That was only one example. There were several times when I felt I must have missed a scene which explained how person "A" could possibly have been aware of circumstance "B" or gotten to point "C."

I suppose there may well be some scenes missing, given the shabby quality of the Russian DVD in general. It's not even in the correct aspect ratio. It is rendered in 1.8:1, but the trailer (see below) shows that the exact same framing should be stretched to 2.3:1. Even if the trailer were not available, it just should have been obvious to the men mastering the DVD that the faces and bodies were not in correct proportions. Sloppy work!

Those negatives are regrettable, because this film could have been a contender. On the plus side, the director of this film did a marvelous job in creating an appropriately bleak atmosphere. The camp is rickety and forbidding. The trains are old and noisy. The prisoners stay within one large hall, with no shelter against the cold except the four flimsy walls around them. The staff's quarters are not significantly better. The vehicles seem to be held together with bailing wire, the fences seem to be rotting, and everything is covered with layers of snow and ice. Audiences will probably be shivering sympathetically.

Good idea. Dripping with atmosphere. Great international cast headed by Vera Farmiga (the doctor), John Malkovich (the KGB officer), and some European stars. Location shooting in St. Petersburg. Lots of potential.

Just a mediocre result.

A so-so movie that should have been great.


Film clips: (I forced the scenes back to the correct aspect ratio.)





  • * Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

  • * White asterisk: expanded format.

  • * Blue asterisk: not mine.

  • No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.







Ski School



Today we bid goodbye to winter with a trip to "Ski School".

No nudity from Charlie Spradling, but she does show off her new bra.


Darlene Vogel is just so cute, she gives us a few breast peeks. Caps and a clip.


Ava Fabian is not at all bashful as she gives us a good look at her boobs. Caps and a clip.




Wash it all down with some topless unknowns. Caps and a clip.








Notes and collages

The Mist


Kelly Collins Lintz


Laurie Holden



Melissa McBride











This is the third of a five-part series featuring the famous 6'2" babe, Julie Strain.

Film clips of Julie Strain in Teasers. (Sample below)









Dita von Teese

Here is part 4 of 7 of the film Pin-Ups2, in which Dita does all sorts of naughty, explicit lesbian and solo activities.


Gisele Bundchen
Naomi Campbell
Abbey Clancy
Cat Deeley
Jenny Frost
Kirsty Gallacher
Nikki Grahame
Sarah Harding
Katherine Heigl
Victoria Hervey
Paris Hilton
Aisleyne Horgan-Wallace
Keira Knightley
Kate Lawler
Lindsay Lohan
Elle Macpherson
Jodie Marsh
Eva Mendes
Sienna Miller
Kemp Muhl
Petra Nemcova
Natalie Portman
Nicole Richie
Jessica Simpson
Nancy Sorrell
Charley Uchea
Kimberley Walsh


Naked on Stage

No clips this time, but some rare captures. Kid Brother, the imager, says he has the vids from which these were made, so we may see them some day, when he has time to assemble them.

Kate Levering in Thou Shalt Not



Heather Tom in Prymate



Alice Ripley in The Rocky Horror Show


Melissa Errico in Sunday in the Park With George



More Pics

Chiara Caselli in Fiorile (1993)


Mariel Hemingway in a 1991 episode of Tales from the Crypt



Paz Vega shows her butt in Spanish GQ


Clips: Classics and Vintage

Melissa Anne Moore in Repossessed (sample right)

Beverly D'Angelo in Hair

Sophie Marceau, hot and fully naked yet again in Descente aux Enfers

Francesca Neri in Outrage

Tanya Roberts in scenes deleted from The Beastmaster

Anna Falchi in Cemetery Man

Sonja Bennett in Punch. Sonja is no Meryl Streep, but she's cute and this scene is notable, not only because she opened up and showed her coochie, but also because her father was directing the scene.

Christine Long in Nightstalker

Two from Sexo Pudor y Lagrimas. Susana Zabaleta and Cecilia Suarez

Blanchard Ryan in Open Water

Farrah in Saturn 3 with Kirk Douglas