* Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

* White asterisk: expanded format.

* Blue asterisk: not mine.

No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.







How Much Do You Love Me?

2005's Combien to m'aimes?, which is French for "Monica Bellici naked," is an offbeat French Comedy starring Monica and some other  people named Farida Rahouadj, Bernard Campan, and Gerard Depardieu.

Campman plays an ordinary-looking office worker with a weak heart. As the film opens, he approaches hooker Bellucci with a proposition. He will pay her 100,000 euros per month to live as his wife until his money runs out. He adds that he has just won the lottery. She quickly accepts. She lasts eight days, and then returns to her pimp/husband, Depardieu. Depardieu is no longer the leading man type, and has been relegated to the role of villain in this film, but it is still not possible to make a French film without him. Farida Rahouadj plays a neighbor who complains about Bellucci's cries of passion, gets into a heated argument with her over who has the best orgasms, and ends up sleeping with Campman after Bellucci splits.

Ultimately, the beautiful hooker finds Depardieu less satisfying than Campman, and returns, but there are more surprises before this one ends ambiguously.

Director Bertrand Blier has made some excellent films, but this wasn't one of them. I did find it occasionally amusing, but it is not the sort of film I will remember next month, nor am I likely to watch it again.


Scoop also scored it a C-, and IMDb readers render about the same verdict at 5.4.


However ... a thumb way up to any director who gets Monica Bellucci naked! This is now available in an all-region DVD.


How Much Do You Love Me? DVD Monica Bellucci Widescreen (2005)

Scoop's note:

Here are some film clips to accompany the collages.


Farida Rahouadj shows breasts in a well-lit and hot sex scene.
Monica Bellucci shows breasts in several scenes, and buns and bush in very dark scenes.










The Rowdy Girls


After yesterday's look at Linnea Quigley we decided to go with another B-Movie legend, the venerable Shannon Tweed. Here are caps and seven clips of Shannon in The Rowdy Girls, in which she masquerades as a nun. Check out her long list of credits at IMDb here.








Loving Deadly

Jesse (Jonathan Ward) is smuggling babies across the border, and he gets busted. When he's in jail, his crime boss wants to keep him happy, so they arrange conjugal visits with a hooker (Sarah Lassez), and they fall in love. They plot to get back at the crime boss, and they accidentally kill the crime boss's identical twin brother.


Sarah Lassez


Diane Profumo and Suzy Sebastian







Notes and collages

"Farscape" - Part 23

Season Four, Episode 3 - part one

Rebecca Riggs, s4, e3







Uma Thurman at the beach. You can find a ton more of these linked through Other Crap. (I only picked up a sampling, since she wasn't naked.)
Rose McGowan and Rosario Dawson (strategically) nude on the cover of Rolling Stone. It's a very sexy picture, even though nothing much is showing.


Mr Skin's take on episode one of The Tudors

Anna Brewster Ruda Gedmintas Slaine Kelly






The Comedy Wire

Comments in yellow...

If you thought all those security cams and speeding cameras were ushering in a "Big Brother" society, prepare for the next phase: Britain's government announced that it will install talking closed-circuit TV cameras across England.  They will not only record people doing anything "anti-social," but the operators will be able to yell at people they catch, using attached loudspeakers. Home Secretary John Reid responded to complaints about the loss of privacy by saying the talking cameras will be aimed at "the small minority who think it is acceptable to litter our streets, vandalize our
communities and damage our properties."

*  "And not wash their hands after using the bathroom!" 

*  To make sure the operators don't abuse it, they'll have cameras pointed at the operators.

The Kuaibao newspaper reports that a woman in Jiangsu, China, owes her life to a pile of shit.  She was hanging laundry when she leaned too far over the balcony and fell six stories.  Luckily, workers below were emptying the building's blocked-up septic tank, and the woman landed on a thick pile of excrement, suffering only minor injuries.  The paper compared it to another recent incident in which a girl's life was saved when she fell six floors and landed in a pile of snow.

*  Except she left behind a much more attractive "snow angel." 

*  I'll bet their dry cleaners didn't think the two incidents were similar.


The Sands Hotel & Casino in Atlantic City is getting cleared out for demolition, and when the slot machines were moved for the first time in 30 years, workers found $17,193.34 in change that gamblers had
dropped under them.

* Who's the high roller who was betting the four cents?