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Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
Junior is on a mini-working-sorta-vacation, so I'm writing the page for a
bit. He's in Amsterdam with some buds, the lucky dog, but will resume writing
the page from Europe in a day or two, assuming he doesn't discover brown cafes.
Ferrari's death "by natural causes")
It was reported
recently in the Brit press that Lolo Ferrari's husband has been charged with
Scoop: "Hey, that sounds like a natural cause to me."
I read that the video for George Michael's new song "Freeek" includes
swearing, nudity and two dogs mating ... any pics?
Scoop: "Not yet. Interestingly, this same report was also
issued for Bjork's new video, until they realized the sound of the two
mating dogs was actually Bjork's singing.
Are you sure that was a video, and not George's home
There are new volumes for: Emmanuelle Beart and
Michelle Bauer. That Bauer volume was a bear. About two dozen movies
(missing many more in her career, so it'll keep growing!), and zillions of
posed pics. This lady has never stopped working.
Man, I'm really into
Training Day. Here's five more, at various degrees of enlargement.
Eva Mendes (1,
Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded
into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that I inexplicably determined
there might be something of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or
Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.
Scoop, just a heads up. I am not sure if you know the television series
Smallville. If not, it is about superman as a teenager, just as he is
discovering his gifts. Anyway, Lana Lang is played by Kristin Kreuk, an
incredibly gorgeous woman. I can't take my eyes off of her whenever she is on
screen. Well, on tonight's episode, she gets really wild and strips down to her
bra and panties before jumping into a pool. What a body. They had some
EXCELLENT shots too, the best from behind. Some real nice belly shots as
well. I truly hope you or your excellent contributors taped this episode and
are hard at work on the caps as I type. It was pretty risque for the show, I
was surprised at the butt shot we got. Well, thanx for reading.
Scoop: "I don't know if that was Lana Lang (Kristin Kreuk)
or a body double on Smallville last night, but here it is, thanks to DAI"
"Boxcar Bertha" (1972)
Boxcar Bertha (1972) -- is one of the better Corman films, in that is has nudity
from a future star, interesting characters, great pace, decent plot, and some
point. Sort of a Bonnie & Clyde takeoff, the characters this time were union
supporters who were not terribly popular during the depression. Scoop reviewed
this pretty thoroughly last week (see the recent reviews link below). I agree
with most of what he said, but will bump my score up to a full C. Anyone who
generally enjoys the genre should like this one.Thumbnails
- Barbara Hershey
Orgazmo (1997) Tonight, I found my level of comedy in this early Trey Parker
film. Trey and Stan Sawicki are Mormon missionaries in Hollywood, a week away
from returning to Salt Lake. We see them being treated rather shabbily at two
houses, then they knock on the door of a little old lady:
"Hello, Ma'am. My goodness, you have such an attractive little garden here."
"Why thank you, young man. I just planted those flowers last week. My, how they
"Yes ma'am. Were from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints."
"Oh, the Mormons."
"That's right. I'm Elder Young, and this is Elder White."
"Well, you two boys can just fuck right off."
"You heard me. Take that Book of Mormon, and shove it so far up your righteous
asses that you choke, you soul soliciting pig fuckers."
There next stop is the home studio of a porno king. Trey is enticed to appear in
the leading role in the film Orgazmo. He will earn enough to marry his fiancée
in the temple, and they will use a stunt cock so he doesn't have to totally
shatter his morals. Orgazmo is a super hero who does in the bad guys with an
orgasm ray gun. I don't want to give away any more of the plot, as I give this
an enthusiastic thumb up.
There is breast exposure from Juli Ashton, a large amount of nudity (snicker
snicker) from someone credited as The Fat Stripper Broad, breasts with pasties
from Anna Kazuki and Yumiko Kumashiro, and pokies and lots of leg from his
girlfriend, Robyn Lynne Raab. There are also many assorted actresses in bra and
panties, and watch for Ron Jeremy as Jizzmaster Zero, and Dian Bachar as
Orgazmo's side-kick, Choda Boy. Ebert says 1/2 star, and calls it just as
sophomoric as Animal House, while Berardinelli, who obviously is not
humor-impaired, awards 3 stars. The Orgazmo DVD is being released April 23 in
Scoop's comments: Trey is the comedy god. If he didn't
win any Oscars for "South Park: Bigger, Longer, Uncut", and if Groucho didn't
win for Duck Soup, then no funny person is ever going to win. If you love Trey's
work, then you have to see Cannibal: the Musical, his demented student film
project, a kind of off-center parody of Oklahoma! (And he's not a bad singer at
Scoop - I was watching Resident Evil again and I noticed some more topless nudity
from Milla Jovovich (1,
2) ! It's a scene
where she is having flashbacks standing in the shower and passing out from the
nerve gas that is sprayed into her bathroom. Anyway, you can clearly see her
right breast while she is standing in the shower! It's all there! The first
picture is a collage of that scene and the second picture is a single frame
capture from the same flashback, but in a different part of the movie. I hope
you'll enjoy it!
I finally got some major computer/scanner issues resolved so I'm back on the
scanning trail again. I'm kicking off with a non-nude image which has
nevertheless given me (and my wife) immense joy over the past few years. It's
of an oil painting that hangs on the wall of our local pizzeria. I live in
Kensington in the middle of London, about 200 yards from where Princess Diana
used to live, and the owner of this particular joint claims that it was 'Diana's
favourite restaurant'. To 'prove' this he had the attached picture painted by
some hack artist. Entitled 'Pizza Diana' I don't think there is a single
example of crass tackiness that could possibly beat it and thus it is, by a long
way, my favourite painting (also known at Chez Snapper as 'The Virgin of the
Four Seasons'). If I was storyboarding this, the next frame would show the chef
flipping the entire pie into Diana's face to great belly laughs from the
Oddly enough, this is the same restaurant used by Renee Zellweger when she
stuffed herself with pizza and garlic bread over a two month period
preparing for her Bridget Jones role (and Oscar nomination). We can only pray
that this will also be recorded in oils! Oh yes, and anyone who wants to view
the Virgin of the Four Seasons in the flesh needs to go to Da Mario's Pizzeria,
15 Gloucester Road, Kensington.
The Snapper knew, I suppose, how much I love kitsch. I
just can't pass up one of those art sales at a closed gas station, where they
sell Elvis in the white jump suit on black velvet, dogs playing poker, Keane
children, Norman Rockwell's small town America, Jesus with eyes that follow you,
neon flamingos, and other staples of the bad taste world. (I even have some of my grandmother's
classic sentimental kitsch from Poland). This Diana picture is now a treasured
Well, today's theme is "big magic eyes"... namely Audrey Hepburn. Why, you
might ask? Well, I can't think of a more lovely creature, than A.H. All
of the pics are from the fifties, except the second one(#3) which dates from the
early sixties (witch makes them twice my age). No nudity of course.
Scoop, Today we start taking a look at the 3d and
final movie in the "Ginger" series. From 1973 "Girls are for Loving", first we
see an unknown actress who along with her boyfriend is forced to strip naked,
then taken outside in the snow, tied to a tree and then after being tormented
by the bad guy is shot. Then it's on to the star of the movie Cheri Caffaro
who is seen kung fu fighting the bad spies with her boobs hanging out. Then to
the beach where she is attacked by another bad guy. More to come.
Cheri Coffaro (1,
I'm sending some pics that I haven't seen around
much of some British Totty.
Denise Van Outen - Caps from Murder In Mind, not
seen these before, The *Cucumber pic* & some candid paparazzi shots. (1,2,3,4,5)
Louise, British pop singer... Paparazzi...YUM! (1,2,3,4,5)
Phillipa Forrester. Paparazzi again, another Brit
TV host. (1,2,3)
Posh Spice.. Aka Victoria Beckham. First time I
have seen these Candid shots. (1,2,3)
|Fashion scans. Beautiful work. Color photos of Nadja in black
and white outfits. This is the only one with any nudity. (A see-through)|
|Nadja Auermann (1,
|From "Ein Dicker Hund"|
||odd paparazzi picture|
||"Romeo is Bleeding" (non-nude)|
||"Romeo is Bleeding"
||"Det Nya Landet"
||"Der Alta Rivalen"
||"Nadia concoce a nadie"
||"The Parole Officer" |
|Pat Reeder The Comedy Wire
Pat's comments in yellow...
Boy, is this guy barking up my tree...
Oscar: No Laughing Matter
By Lou Lumenick
NEW YORK - Bob Hope jokingly referred to Oscar night as "passover" because, like
many comic icons, he was never even nominated for an Academy Award. He's part of
a notorious list that includes such all-time greats as W.C. Fields, Mae West and
the Marx Brothers and, more recently, Jerry Lewis and Eddie Murphy. Cary Grant,
a genius of light comedy, was nominated for two heavy dramatic
roles (never his forte), but had to settle for an honorary Oscar after
retirement. Charlie Chaplin never got an acting nod, though he received one for
screenwriting and shared an award for composing. Serious actors have generally
fared better, but there are some head-scratchers among them, too. Greta Garbo,
nominated four times, never won. Edward G. Robinson got zilch - though, like
Garbo and Chaplin, he lived long enough to collect an honorary Oscar. So did
Alfred Hitchcock, the most exalted non-winner among directors. The Master of
Suspense was nominated six times, but struck out even when Rebecca (1940) won
From the NY Post. Vogue is going
to start running photos of women larger than size zero. They say they are
"profiling the prevalent shapes of a woman's body." Sounds like you might have
grounds for an infringement lawsuit. My favorite line is the last one. Yes,
when I want a mixture of high fashion and reality, I always turn to
Vogue. Or else I turn to Page Six and read about which supermodel is back in
NEW YORK - The April issue of Vogue magazine hitting newsstands this week
features women of all shapes and sizes - the first time the venerable fashion
bible has splashed big-boned beauties across its pages. "We chose to profile the
prevalent shapes of a woman's body," said super-skinny Vogue editor Anna Wintour.
"We couldn't create an issue devoted to all the shapes of a woman's body and not
include women who are upward from a size 10. We wanted to include everyone."
In this case, "everyone" includes voluptuous television chef Nigella Lawson, who
candidly discusses her lifelong love of food and her battle
with her weight, while stick-thin writer Joan Didion reveals that she would have
a more commanding presence as a reporter if she were bigger. Plus-size model
Kate Dillon, who at 5-foot-11 and 170 pounds is a zaftig size 12, admits, "Sure,
I'd love to have Britney Spears' body. "So I'm a little larger - is that so bad?
I feel sexy and strong."
Vogue being Vogue, there's an emphasis on how style can accommodate different
shapes. Both statuesque socialite Alexandra Schlesinger, who's almost 6-foot-3,
and pint-sized figure skater Sasha Cohen complain they can't find clothes that
fit. Pregnant actress Anne Heche finds a way to look sexy in maternity clothes,
but boxer Laila Ali says she often hides her muscles under conservative clothing
approved by her Muslim father, boxer Muhammad Ali.
"By depicting the range of female shape, we think that readers and the fashion
industry will be struck by how wonderful women can look whatever their shape
is," Wintour said. At least one designer who's seen the spread saluted Vogue's
efforts. "I love the mix of high fashion and reality as only Vogue could do,"
Michael Kors said.