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Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)


I took a look at "The Warriors". The film's critics are right in that it does romanticize and glamorize gang violence, making their costumes stylized and attractive, and turning the Warrior's flight into a noble quest for freedom. It is set in a world which looks like the New York subway system, except that the director took the subway system at night and made it seem beautiful, as if the movie world were the canvas, and the subway merely supplied the palette. Tuna was right. This is a much underrated movie with a unique visual sense, which could be a masterpiece if

a. they edited out about ten dead minutes in it


b. they added some tits.

Here's a tip for you young filmmakers. If the friggin' MPAA is going to give you an r-rating for violence and language, then take the time and show the consideration to add plenty of tits. Because tits can only get you an R, not an NC-17, and you already have the damned R anyway, so the tits are free! Think of it as an all-you-can-eat buffet, where you can pile all the tits you want on your plate, and you've already paid for the meal.

  • Diane Van Valkenbergh (1, 2, 3, 4)


A brief second look at "Erin Brockovich".



  • TomCat did Julia Lemmertz in some recent Brazilian movie, and frankly it sort of pisses me off that he sits in Poland watching Brazilian movies and I can't even get the San Antonio stations. (1, 2, 3, 4)

  • He also did Allison Lange in Christina's House.

  • And the blue-filtered scene with Kidman and the sailor in Eyes Wide Shut. The first one is a B&W look, just for fun. Others in the film's actual tint. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

  • Finally, somebody help me out with this one. If you don't know the movie, tell me what you do know for sure. Do you know the name of the actress, or even the actor with her?

Graphic Response
  • Barbara Hershey topless in extremely rare vidcaps from the 1972 movie "Dealing: Or the Berkeley-to-Boston Forty-Brick Lost-Bag Blues".

    Some trivia..."Dealing..." was based on the novel of the same same writen by "Jurassic Park" author Michael Crichton. Also, Jon Lithgow made his debut performance in this movie.

  • Amanda Donohoe nekkid and freaky in the 1988 Ken Russell movie "The Lair of the White Worm".

  • Brainscan
    First, the answer to the Anais Jeanneret pics on Saturday's Funhouse: most of them came from L'ui before it went belly up. Couple of months ago I sent in a few scans of the same pics.

    Now for the new stuff. Unusual page 3 babe today, an active duty soldier in Her Majesty's army named Roberta Winterton. Here are a few pics of her and the Reuter's news report of her soon-to-be discharge.

  • Roberta Winterton (1, 2)

    From Reuters

    Naked Ambition Costs Soldier Her Job

    LONDON (Reuters) - A female British soldier who posed topless for Britain's top-selling Sun tabloid is being kicked out of the army, Defense Ministry officials said on Wednesday.

    Lance corporal Roberta Winterton, 20, has no regrets, however, about peeling off her uniform for the tabloid.

    "I loved my time (in the army) but now I can get on with what I really want to be -- and that's a top class model," Winterton was quoted as saying by the Sun.

    Winterton's unimpressed army superiors ordered her out of her barracks in Wiltshire in southern England and have begun formal discharge proceedings, a senior army official told Reuters.

    "Discharge proceedings are under way but they take a couple of weeks," he said.

    Winterton's topless pictures appeared a week after the Defense Ministry disclosed that another woman soldier, paraded as the female face of the army in an advertising campaign, had been AWOL for seven months.

    Lance Bombardier Heidi Cochrane and her soldier boyfriend gave themselves up at an English barracks in February and face disciplinary action. The ministry has said it is "highly likely" the couple will be jailed.

    Two fashion models follow; the unique look of Spanish model, Esther Canadas, and the Canadian model, Heidi Espana. Okay, the second of those is a lie. But Esther is real. And to make amends I am sending along a scan of Karen Nelson that made its way onto the web.

  • Esther Canadas
  • Karen Nelson

    Then there are the Scandinavian models, Carolina Gynning and Helle Michaelsen. Good ol' Helle was, at one point in her career, one helle of a good bunnymagmate... what one of the regular posters calls a Heffer, but I spent way too much time in Wisconsin for that word to denote anyone attractive.

  • Carolina Gynning
  • Helle Michaelsen (1, 2, 3)

    Thought someone might like this scan of Casey Lynn, fitness model of some repute.

    And I end this here post by runnin' home to momma, or the equivalent thereof, by sending in a mess o' scans of a Brazilian babe. Her name is Adriana Ferrari, and I gather she is a tv star of some sort and maybe even a singer at times. Wonderin' what she looks like? Junior, she is Brazilian and I scanned her; can there be any doubt that combination spells "killer arse" in any language?

  • Adriana Ferrari (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

  • Oz
    One of our Sunday papers ran an article on Bijou Phillips accompanied by a nice photograph. Non-nude and, unfortunately, not on high quality paper.
  • Bijou Phillips

    "Sweet Angel Mine"
    This is one of those bizarre stories. Alberta Watson and Margaret Langrick are sisters and, with their mother, have a secret. Enter a man and things start to unravel. Some topless exposure from Margaret.

  • Alberta Watson
  • Margaret Langrick (1, 2)

    "An American Dream"
    You can't expect much nudity from this interesting 1966 film but both Eleanor Parker and Susan Denberg give the briefest of topless exposure. A good one for the DVD if it ever comes out.

  • Eleanor Parker (1, 2)
  • Susan Denberg

    Benny Hill Show
    Continuing the look at the Angels we have Corrine Russell and Sue Upton. Corrine can close to showing us the goodies when she did a balloon dance. Outside of Benny Hill she did a lot of nude modeling, including gyno-cam, in some English girlie mags. Sue is the blonde bombshell, and one of the sexiest of all of the Angels.

  • Corrine Russell (1, 2, 3)
  • Sue Upton (1, 2, 3, 4)

    "El Topo"
    El Topo, or The Mole, is one of those films you can watch and not know what on earth is going on. There is plenty of blood, rape, pillage and a brothel, but this 1971 Mexican film left me wondering.

    Paula Romo and Mara Lorenzio show us the goodies and there is a bit of exposure by some unknown actresses in the brothel.

  • Paula Romo
  • Mara Lorenzio (1, 2)
  • Unknown

    "Endless Love"
    Well, it was supposed to Brooke Shields but we know it wasn't. I don't know who the body double was in the sloppy love story called Endless Love. What a crap movie.

  • Brooke Shields (1, 2, 3)

    "Casino Royale"
    This was an enjoyable spoof on the James Bonds movies. No nudity but some interesting caps of Barbara Bouchet, Ursula Andress and Daliah Lavi, who was captured in an interesting machine!

  • Barbara Bouchet
  • Ursula Andress
  • Daliah Lavi (1, 2)

    "I Want You"
    So far, most collages in the Funhouse from I Want You have concentrated on Rachel Weisz's full-frontal nudity, and I've added my version. Dee Dee Menta, who plays a stripper, and Labina Mitevska also give us some very good exposure.

  • Rachel Weisz (1, 2, 3)
  • Dee Dee Menta (1, 2)
  • Labina Mitevska (1, 2, 3)

    "Bride of Chucky"
    The two assets of Jennifer Tilly are prominent during the early stages of the movie Bride of Chucky. No exposure, although you can see a bit of nip-slip if you use your imagination in the second collage. Janet Kidder also looks rather sexy in her outfit in the movie.

    The movie itself is an enjoyable horror with a lot of comedy thrown in. It doesn't take itself seriously. Jennifer Tilly raises a rubber doll to life using voodoo and the soul of a serial killer (she uses the book Voodoo for Dummies, as you can see in the first collage). It comes back to bite her, and then the mayhem really starts. Well worth watching.

  • Janet Kidder
  • Jennifer Tilly (1, 2)

  • AP
    Sabrina Setlur One of Captain Kirk's alien girlfriends from Rigel 4? Nope, but she is a singer and former girlfriend of Boris Becker.

    Julie Bowen Nip slip at the People's Choice awards.

    Edna Robinson Gettin' it on in scenes from "Hinter Gittern".

    Bettina Kramer Nice breast exposure, also from "Hinter Gittern".

    Yvonne Rosello
    (1, 2)

    Tina Lathan
    (1, 2)

    Two models doing some advertising for shops in Germany. So what's the gimmick? Well they're walking the streets in nothing but bodypaint!

    Petit Agathe From Mancester United. AP wasn't quite sure of the source for this topless pic.

    (1, 2, 3)

    (1, 2)




    Comments by AP:
    These are pics from the show Girlscamp. Its like big brother, all the girls are locked in a house etc. The hole thing is happening in a house somewhere in Tennerifa Spain where they can enjoy the sun outdoor pool and every week one of them is voted out.

    Jr. Here...every girl shows at least upstairs goodies.

    and ...
    Natalia Wörner
    (1, 2)

    Vidcaps from the 1994 movie "Die Sieger" by UC99. #1 features full frontal nudity, although it looks like it was shot through a shower curtain, so it's not the clearest nudity ever captured. #2 is a more standard, easy to see topless scene.

    Betsy Russell New from Helcrom...Topless and far off rear nudity in scenes from 1985's "Out of Control".

    Claudia Udy Nice breast exposure in sex scenes from "Out of Control" by Helcrom.

    Amanda Donohoe Amanda topless and sporting a über-sized strap-on from "The Lair of the White Worm".

    Catherine Mary Stewart A very brief bit of nipple exposure from 1992's "Psychic".

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