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* Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).
* White asterisk:
expanded format.
*
Blue asterisk: not mine.
No asterisk: it probably
sucks.
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OTHER CRAP:
Catch the deluxe
version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles,
here.
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How to be a Player
How to be a Player (1997) is a lightweight sex farce staring Bill Bellamy,
who has a live-in girlfriend, and half a dozen other lovers to take up his
time when she is working. His baby sister, plump and unpopular, desperately
wants to get him busted, and, with the help of her girlfriend Mari Morrow,
hits on a perfect plan. She will invite all of his women to a party he is
attending. Unaware of the peril he is in, he spends the day hanging with his
home boys, and tapping the odd booty. Along the way, one of his friends,
trying to imitate his life style, gets busted when his girlfriend forces her
way in in time to see Jazsmin Lewis come down the stairs topless.
After a BBQ at his mother's house, he is off to the party ...
It is not PC, but is not consistently funny, either. The good news is that
it never takes itself seriously.
I estimate that it is a C- as a sex comedy.
- IMDb readers have this at 4.4
- It did enjoy a theatrical release, and earned $14M against a budget of
only $5.74M.
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La Fille De Lady Chatterley
Julia Clifford lives in a boarding school, where she spends all her
free time reading over and over again the "Lady Chatterley's Lover"
book. She wants to be like Lady Chatterley. She visits her aunt on a
holiday, where she meets the lover of none other than her mother. He
gets very disturbed when he sees her because she reminds him of his
former mistress, and tries to ignore her.
Following Chatterley's prescription, she starts to seduce him ...
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Shortbus, 2006, is a comedy/drama, but probably unlike most
you've seen. It is a story with a sexual theme, but what makes it really
controversial is that the scenes are not only explicit, but real. The
actors were recruited in New York City where it was set, and all agreed to
perform real sex acts, so nothing was simulated. The critics loved it, but
there's no escaping the fact that certain shots are exactly what you see
in a porn film, although I left the most explicit stuff out of the
collages. Sofia (Sook-Yin Lee) is a couples therapist, happily married,
and very much enjoying the frequent sex she has with her husband.
Unfortunately, she has one little secret: she's never had an orgasm, which
is rather ironic for a couples therapist.
Sofia decides to explore her sexuality and try to solve her problem by
going to Shortbus, a private club where couples gather to work out their
sexual tensions and desires, and also have tons of group sex. Interacting
with the people there help her to work out her sexual tensions.
The film is interesting, although frankly I found parts of it extremely
draggy. It's very talky, and although there is plenty of nudity and sex,
they kept the sex scenes fairly short, leaving an awful lot of time for
philosophizing about sex. Still, the sex is there, explicit, and both
heterosexual and homosexual. Frankly, I think the critics that loved it
are just trying to prove how "enlightened" they are, because I basically
found it boring.
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| Lindsay Beamish |
Shanti Carson |
Sook-Yin Lee |
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Here are clips of what has to be the oddest porno movie ever made, entitled
Pastries. Most of it is lame comedy, randomly interspersed with money shots
from old grainy loops. And I do mean random in the mathematical sense of the
word, as in occurring without rhyme, reason or pattern. But the movie has
Uschi Digart, the two Sandys of 70's crossover fame (Carey and Dempsey) and a
couple of other fine looking women. Not much more to say except that every
reason you might have to watch the film is right here.
The file named "Sandy Dempsey 2a" is something of an oddity. If you match
the character in this scene with Sandy to the actress listed in IMDb you come
up with Rene Bond. That cannot be true...doesn't look a thing like her. No
matter, she's something of a babe, herself.
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Notes and collages
"Farscape" - Part 5 (for real this
time)
Scoop's note: Yesterday's group was really part 4. It was just a
coincidence that the caps
jump from episode 10 to episode 14. Rok did no caps from them because he
found nothing capworthy!
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Pat's comments in yellow...
On his daily radio show, Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez said that when he
called President Bush a donkey, a drunkard and a devil, it was "nothing
personal." Chavez said Bush is part of a long line of US administrations
that he opposes for "deep ethical, political, historic and geopolitical"
reasons; but "one day, if maybe George Bush and I survive all of this, we
will reach old age, and it would be good to play a game of dominos, street
baseball..."
* “…maybe take in a Dixie Chicks concert…”
* Heck, Bush is willing to take him on a hunting trip with Dick Cheney
right now!
* So he’s just a political windbag who calls his opponents names…No wonder
he has a daily radio show!
Tadeus Konopizc of Zakopane, Poland, drank a bottle of vodka after his wife
left him. Then he flew into a drunken rage, grabbed a kitchen knife and cut
off his own penis.
* That’s the Polish way of getting revenge on your
wife.
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