• Charlie's French Cinema Nudity site is updated.


Olga's Sommer (2002)

One of our readers tracked this down after I mentioned it yesterday.

Two words: incredibly charming!

Here are two .avi files zipped together.

Here are some more captures:

Clémence Poésy in Olga's Sommer (2002) - approximately age 19

Other Crap:

This week's movies (3000 screens): Failure to Launch - 24% positive reviews. (Rom-com with SJP and McConaughey)

This week's movies (one trillion screens): The Shaggy Dog - 33% positive reviews. (Actual screen count: 3501)

This week's movies (800 screens): The Libertine - 35% positive reviews

  • "Any movie top-billed by a star as hot as Johnny Depp that somehow manages to sit on a shelf for more than a year after its completion is bound to be a stinker."
  • " of those supposedly daring erotic dramas that could actually work as a video touting abstinence. The sex is that soulless, that dingy, that diseased."

VULVA Original: the authentically natural vaginal fragrance

  • I'm stickin' with Sex Panther

Here's a tip for you youngsters who hope to become mass murderers. It's here now! The ideal way for you to store your kitchen knives.

Getting people back into the churches: "Free Porn Weekend - Clermont Fellowship Church"

The Colbert Report: The Enron Trial and Monopoly

  • Monopoly has given our children a vital working knowledge of the streets of Atlantic City.

Stephen Colbert interviews former Secretary of the Navy turned novelist turned U.S. Senate candidate James Webb.

Stephen Colbert continues his quest to become an English Lord

"You can own an American flag that actually flew over The Colbert Report, and which Stephen wrapped himself in."

As Iraq edges closer to civil war, Stephen Colbert gives the Iraqis tips in "Sound Advice."

"The Daily Show's Senior Baseball Drug Expert Rob Corddry witnessed Barry Bonds try to fuck a Coke machine."

The Daily Show: "We'll help India build nuclear reactors if their children stop crushing us in spelling bees."

"The Daily Show's Resident Expert, John Hodgman, takes a look at India and Pakistan, which are apparently two different countries."

The Shaggy Dog as reviewed by The Hollywoody Show with Woody Whitman

Ten clips from Thank You for Smoking (2006)

  • The hero of "Thank You for Smoking" is Nick Naylor (Aaron Eckhart), chief spokesman for Big Tobacco, who makes his living defending the rights of smokers and cigarette makers in today's neo-puritanical culture. Confronted by health zealots out to ban tobacco and an opportunistic senator (William H. Macy) who wants to put poison labels on cigarette packs, Nick goes on a PR offensive, spinning away the dangers of cigarettes on TV talk shows and enlisting a Hollywood super-agent (Rob Lowe) to promote smoking in movies. Nick's newfound notoriety attracts the attention of both tobacco's head honcho (Robert Duvall) and an investigative reporter for an influential Washington daily (Katie Holmes). Nick says he is just doing what it takes to pay the mortgage, but he begins to think about how his work makes him look in the eyes of his young son Joey (Cameron Bright).

'The Sopranos' returns Sunday after nearly two years in hiatus.

If you really love all the details, here is the complete MPAA report which is referenced in the link just below this. (.pdf format)

The world box office dipped 7.9% last year

  • The USA dropped 6%, to 9 billion. The overseas markets dropped 9%, to 14 billion.

"evidence of liquid water on Saturn's moon Enceladus."

  • The water is fairly close to the surface and erupts in geyser format. (Or so they theorize.) At the moment they can't quite figure out how water can exist in liquid form so close to the surface of a world so cold.

Celebrities share their favorite swear words.

iBuzz - the music-activated iPod orgasm machine

  • Man! They say peanut butter and chocolate are a great combo, but can they compare to an orgasm and a Manilow song ... ?

Conan visits Finland, is treated like Captain Cook in Tahiti

  • "was treated with the same dignity and gravitas as Nelson Mandela meeting with Mother Teresa,' he said. 'My feeling was, 'Is this really happening?' '"

PRESIDENT OF IRAN IS A "TOTAL WHACK JOB," SAYS KIM JONG-IL ... Recent Comments Make Iranian Seem Like Madman, Madman Says

  • Mr. bin Laden, who replaced Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein in the Axis of Evil when he was toppled in 2003, said that trash-talking between Kim and Mr. Amadinejad was “nothing out of the ordinary” for the two evildoers. “That’s how they roll,” Mr. bin Laden said, adding that Axis of Evil meetings often descend into insults and “yo mama” jokes. While the al Qaeda terror mastermind said that his two colleagues were often exasperating, he said he has no plans to leave the Axis of Evil: “Someone around here has to be the voice of reason.”

The French trailer from Three Times (And, if you're lucky - an ad for The Dukes of Hazzard in French!)

  • Three stories set in three times, 1911, 1966 and 2005. The same two actors play the two main characters in each story. One of the actors is the foxy Shu Qi (The Transporter)
  • Click on "haute rés." for the hi-res trailer.

Six new clips from The Zodiac (a film about the Zodiac killer)

Five clips from Duck Season (Temporada de patos)

  • "Duck Season takes you into one particular Sunday morning in the lives of two fourteen-year old boys, Flama and Moko. With their neighbor Rita and pizza delivery boy Ulises, they create their own adventures to overcome their boredom. Duck Season explores the loneliness of childhood, the effects of divorce and the curious power of love and friendship."

The trailer for The Godfather of Green Bay

The official blurb:

  • Joe Keegan (Pete Schwaba) is the 'Rocky' of stand-up comedy. A fifteen year comedy veteran who was pegged for stardom early on in his career but has blown every major audition he has ever had in legendary fashion. Fresh off a recent fiasco with a heckler that included a broken nose, Joe's friend Kenny (Lance Barber) tells him he can get them an audition for 'The Tonight Show' and that it's 'a can't miss.' The one catch is that it's at a roadside bar in tiny Pine Lake , Wisconsin , hometown of Tonight Show Talent scout, Harvey Skorik who never misses 'Rocktoberfest'. Having doubts but needing a break from L.A. , Joe reluctantly agrees to go.

    Arriving in Wisconsin , Joe bombs his first night on stage when local emcee 'Dug'(Thomas Lennon) sabotages him. Joe cannot get a break until he encounter's his former high school English teacher, the beautiful Molly Mahoney (Lauren Holly) who is also at a crossroads in her life, coming off a failed marriage. Molly is excited for Joe's 'Tonight Show' opportunity. Joe tells her he just wants to prove to himself that he hasn't been wasting the last fifteen years of his life. Molly makes him realize just the opposite - that he has been living his dream.

    Things finally start looking up for Joe Keegan until he finds that the biggest audition of his life will be in front of his toughest crowd yet; Packer fans, Deer Hunters and The Godfather of Green Bay, Big Jake Norquist (Tony Goldwyn), a former high school football star turned drug dealer who is also in love with Molly.

    Filled with great characters, big laughs and surprising twists, The Godfather of Green Bay will not only make you laugh, it will leave you with such a warm feeling you'll want to move to Pine Lake, Wisconsin!

Gates fortune hits 50 billion dollars as megawealth spreads

Despite the incalculable loss to Western culture, Madonna promises no more films

  • "She fears her terrible acting reputation will condemn any film."
  • Amazingly good self-awareness. Leave out the word "reputation," and it is film criticism on a level with Pauline Kael.


Movie Reviews:

Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.




A History of Violence (2005)

This film is rather conventional by David Cronenberg's standards, but this in no way diminishes its impact. The opening has two rather bored companions checking out of a cheap motel. One goes in to settle the bill, then the other goes in to fill a water jug. It is only then we realize that the first man has killed the desk clerk and a maid. A little girl walks in on the scene, and the second man shoots her in the head with no qualms.

Cut to a small Indiana town, where we meet the Stall family. The father (Viggo Mortensen) owns a small diner, his wife (Maria Bello) is an attorney, his young daughter worries about monsters in the dark, and his teenaged son is a favorite target of a High School bully. There is a wonderful scene where Maria Bello dresses up as a cheerleader when the kids are out, and the two have hot sex, including 69 (the first such scene in a mainstream American film). Her bum is partially visible in this scene.

The next evening, the two bad guys from the opening scene arrive at the diner at closing time, and threaten everyone there. Mortensen disarms and kills them. The incident is reported nationally, and he is suddenly hailed as a hero across the country, but doesn't much seem to like his new-found fame. When three Mafia types arrive at the dinner, we learn why Mortensen is worried. Mortensen was a gang hit man in his former life, and the gang, including his brother, is after him.

The rest of the film is full of sudden violence as Mortensen attempts to eliminate the ghosts of his past life. It is not only murder we see, but many other examples of violence as well. Mortensen sort of rapes his wife. His son stands up to the bully and puts him in the hospital, for which Mortensen slaps him. Bello then slaps Mortensen.

What makes the film so intriguing is that the audience becomes completely complicit in the violence, after which Cronenberg shows the grotesque results of it, demonstrating, I suppose, that extreme violence is just under the surface of all of us.

The nudity comes when Maria Bello shows full frontal in an open robe to Mortensen. After two sex scenes with nearly no flesh seen, this seemed almost gratuitous.

IMDb readers say 7.6. It earned $31.5M against a $32M budget. Ebert says 3.5 stars, and Berardinelli only three. I have not seen all of last years Oscar contenders, but this is the best I have seen from last year. On one level, it is a simple revenge film, but on another, it speaks volumes about how violence is just under the surface of many people. This is a B, and my favorite to date of Cronenberg's films.


Maria Bello






Today a little trip into the world of soft core erotic film. This little masterpiece is called "Bounty Huntress 2." I will say this: its star is Chesea Blue who is quite an attractive dish. We start it off with a little down-blouse and then it's off to the races as Chelsea shows it all.




Dann reports on The Ice Harvest:

Almost every character in this 2005 comedy/crime caper movie is a loser, except the viewer, who is treated to a very funny and enjoyable flick, with a great cast.

On Christmas Eve in Wichita, Kansas, an attorney for strip joints and other sleazy businesses teams up with his unsavory friend to embezzle two million dollars from a local Kansas City mob boss. Unfortunately for the pair, the boss figures things out and shows up, none too pleased, looking for his two million. Now everyone starts playing screw-your-buddy with everyone else to try and escape the big guy's wrath.

This hilarious and twisty movie will keep you laughing and guessing throughout.

Lara Phillips Meghan Maureen McDonough Connie Nielsen




Gaelle Bossu in Ma vie en l'air
Emily Booth in  Evil Aliens
Tree Carr in  Evil Aliens
Mildred Von Heildegard in Evil Aliens
Natassia Malthe in Chaos
Sherilyn Fenn in The Wraith
Vickie Benson in The Wraith
Helene De Saint-Pere in Peindre ou faire l'amour
Amira Casar in Peindre ou faire l'amour
Bijou Phillips in Havoc
Anne Hathaway in Havoc
Keira Knightley in Domino
A rare see-through from Jeri Ryan
Stephenie Sherrin in "Kids in America," recreating the famous Phoebe Cates scene in Fast Times.


Pat's comments in yellow...

The National Center for Men has launched a longshot legal battle to get out of child support that's been nicknamed "Roe v. Wade for Men."  They say Roe V. Wade gave women more options in the event of an unintended pregnancy than men have: the right to choose abortion, put the child up for adoption or keep it, and all because it has such a huge impact on her life.  But the group says the pregnancy also has a profound impact on men's
lives, and it's unfair that they have no say at all.  So the father should have
the right to choose to decline financial responsibility for a child he doesn't

*  The father's right to choose generally ends right after he chooses to take
his pants off.

*  And he should have the right to choose not to wear a condom, 'cause those things cramp my style.

*  I have a feeling the judge will exercise his right to abort this case in
under three months.