"Blame it on Rio"

Blame it on Rio (1984) is well known to Fun House Readers due to the full frontal from Michelle Johnson, early natural breast exposure from Demi Moore, and the raft of topless sun bathers at the beach. This is my third run at doing images. The VHS version left much to be desired, and I think I have gotten them right this time. Each time I watch this comedy I enjoy it a little less.

Michael Caine and daughter Demi Moore, best friend Joseph Bologna and daughter Michelle Johnson, and Caine's wife, Valerie Harper, are to spend a month at a rented villa in Rio. At the last minute, Harper announces that she is going somewhere else, alone. Bologna is in the middle of a contentious divorce. Bologna is a ladies man, Caine a straight arrow, but Caine ends up screwing Johnson on the beach their first night there. I think this is the point where I am unable to suspend disbelief. First, I can't imagine Caine as any hot 18 year old's heartthrob. Second, I just don't believe a straight arrow would get involved with the barely legal daughter of his best friend nearly under the noses of her father and his daughter. If you can sallow that one, the rest of the film will be easy to accept.

IMDb readers have this at 5.1 of 10. Michelle Johnson was nominated for a Razzie as worst new star. Th4e transfer on this DVD is top notch, which means great visuals of Rio, including a fantastically decorated villa. This is a C. IF you like comedy from the middle 80's, chances are you also like this one.

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  • Demi Moore (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • Michelle Johnson (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75)
  • Unknown (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)

    "Saturn 3"

    Saturn 3 (1980) is a UK Sci Fi thriller. That said, you know that it will involve a strange environment (in this case, a moon of Saturn), an interesting conflict based on science (in this case, hydroponic gardening and man vs. robot), and some sex and or nudity. Kirk Douglas and Farrah Fawcett man a food research station on a moon of Saturn. As the film opens, a rocket is being readied to visit them. Someone kills the captain, and flies off himself. We eventually learn that he is to provide them with the most advanced robot ever to aide them in their work. He is to build it, then program it, transferring knowledge directly from his brain to the robot.

    Unfortunately, the reason he killed the person assigned to the job was because he had been flunked out of the training program because he was too mentally unstable to correctly set up the robot. He also decides he wants to screw Fawcett, who has an exclusive relationship with Douglas. As expected, he programs a neurotic robot with the hots for Fawcett, who starts rebelling against his master. The story turns into a battle of man vs robot.

    Fawcett shows her breasts after a shower, and a few moments later in bed with Douglas. She clearly wasn't hired for her resonant speaking voice or her thespian prowess, and they had her poking through every costume she wore. The set design was elaborate, and fairly well done. Harvey Keitel as the demented captain was way over the top in his performance, which, when added to Fawcett's squeaky little girl voice and Douglas style was like throwing a bucket of sand in the gear box. Nonetheless, it is short, and has the required elements for the genre. IMDB readers say 4.4 of 10. I will give it a C-, with the caveat that it is a must for Fawcett fans, but you will need to order it on Region 2 fro the UK.

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  • Farrah Fawcett (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)



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    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
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    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.


    Words from Scoop.

    .avi's from Shiloh.

    .wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.


    Advanced Lesbotronics


    Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble with the codecs for these movies:

    Shiloh says:

    FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the vids says the video codec:  DivX Decoder Filter & audio codec:  Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with. When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG Layer-3.  A friend of mine told me about compressing the audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
    When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp & asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost too much to buy in my opinion.

    A reader says:

    You mentioned that some users were having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool designed to determine what codec is needed for a video. Hope this is useful to you or your users.

    Scoop says:

    I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9. The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly larger, and slightly lower quality.

    'Caps and comments by Vejiita:

    Today we have 'caps from the South Korean movie "Sex is Zero". All the girls do topless scenes except the lead actress Ji-Won Ha. But just for fun, I've included her topless in scenes from another South Korean movie "Nightmare".

    • Ji-won Ha from "Sex Is Zero". Tight tops, cleavage and some almost toplessness in links 3 and 4. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
    • Ji-won Ha bonus toplessness from "Nightmare" (1, 2)

    • So-Won Ham (1, 2)

    • Jae-yeong Jin, great bikini 'caps in #1 and #2, plus toplessness and brief rear views in a love scene (links 3-6). (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    • Yi Shin (1, 2, 3)

    • Si-Hu Yun (1, 2)

    Jennifer Aniston
    (1, 2)

    Serious pokies and tight pants in scenes from an episode of "Friends". 'Caps by Gman.

    Amy Jo Johnson
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    The former Pink Ranger teases us in scenes "Infested" (2002). Even though she doesn't give up the goods, she's still gorgeous and a favorite of mine. Thanks to Johnny Moronic for the 'caps.

    Rena Mero
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

    Better known as rasslin' babe Sable. Here she is in scenes from "Girl Camp" aka "The Final Victim" (directed by one of our favorite Grade Z film makers, Lloyd A. Simandl). We see Sable in lingerie, then baring her bum and partial breast views in a shower scene.

    Penélope Cruz
    (1, 2, 3)

    Barely keeping the goodies stuffed into her dress at a red carpet event.

    Siboney Lo
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)

    Señor Skin 'caps of the Chilean actress topless (and also showing bush in links 12 and 13) in scenes from "El Leyton" (2002).

    Pat Reeder
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    Justin Guarini's Available - Justin Timberlake has pulled out of co-hosting ABC's "Motown 45" special, but producers say it's not because of outrage from black viewers who think he let Janet Jackson take all the blame for their Super Bowl boob stunt. Justin says he has to work at filming his first movie role.

  • He's playing a guy who rips off a girl's blouse, then blames her...It's called "Weenie: The Movie."
  • If they want a white guy to host a Motown show, hire Michael Jackson.

    She Just Married Both Counselors - Britain's Star magazine claims that Britney Spears has given up sex and is vowing to remain celibate as she renews her relationship with Jesus. They say she's once again attending church and seeing two counselors. An unnamed "friend" is quoted as saying that after a year of wild behavior culminating in her annulled quickie marriage, Britney was given the book "Conversations With God" by her mom, to make her realize how inappropriate her behavior had become.

  • Britney is such an airhead, even God can't stand to hold a conversation with her.
  • Funny how she became interested in Christianity right after learning how religious Mel Gibson is.
  • She may even become a nun...A really hot nun.
  • Actually, she's not having a relationship with Jesus...It's a backup dancer named "Hay-soos."

    Culture Clubbing - Boy George agreed to pay about $15,000 (US) to the membership secretary of a London nightclub. George punched the man, then later told the gay magazine Boyz that he'd provoked George and deserved to be hit. The man sued when Boy George refused to retract, but he dropped the suit when George agreed to pay libel damages, apologize and publicly state that he didn't deserve to be punched.

  • It's bad enough to be known as the guy who got beaten up by Boy George.
  • Apparently, Boy George really wanted to hurt him.
  • The punch didn't hurt, but his nails were deadly.
  • So where's the money coming from? Rosie O'Donnell is tapped out.
  • I'd like to see a Pay-Per-View cage match between Boy George and Liza Minnelli.

    Urkel Will Translate - Showtime is planning a new "Queer Eye"-like reality show called "Make Me Cool," in which hopelessly square Caucasians will get lessons from four very hip black guys in the cutting edge of black culture: clothes, music, slang and more. Showtime President Robert Greenblatt said he thinks the frank and explicit dialogue between different cultures and races will make the show sociologically interesting.

  • He should be the first subject.
  • One problem: the Caucasians never actually become cool.
  • Wasn't there already a movie about this? It was called "Malibu's Most Wanted"...Or was it "Eight Mile?"