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Shattered Image
I don't have a lot to add to Tuna's summary, which was as
follows:
"Shattered Image (1994-TV) is a made-for-cable thriller staring Bo
Derek. If that isn't enough to put you off, Bo's acting was the best thing
about the film. Bo is an ex model, and married to a rich garment designer,
but not getting along with him. He is kidnapped. The kidnappers are
serious, as evidenced by them sending Bo his pinky finger. The FBI agent
in charge (Jack Scalia) soon discovers that hubby had embezzled $10M from
the company. Then we are let in on a secret. His brother/partner and Bo
planned the kidnapping from the start.
When the FBI gets a hot lead and closes in on the kidnappers, the
baddies drive through a garage door and run over Scalia's partner. In the
subsequent pursuit, they run over a cliff and explode. The FBI wants to
close the case, but not our man Scalia.
There are several twists and turns before this one is over, and you
might want to keep a score card as it goes along. Write in pencil, and
have a big eraser handy.
Bo Derek shows breasts and buns in a dark sex scene, a breast in a hot
tub, and pokies the rest of the time.
IMDb readers say 4.8. Keep in mind that TV offerings generally are
rated higher than movies, which will give you an idea of the quality of
this one. Honestly, I like looking at Bo as much as the next guy, but a
little acting could have gone a long way toward making this watchable.
This is a low C-. And that's very generous."
There are way too many plot contrivances, as Tuna implied above. Way too
many, to the point where one cannot, having seen the entire film, think back
upon the details and correctly imagine which of the baddies must have been
responsible for which of the various schemes and double-crosses, and who was
really in league with whom at any given point. The problem with this kind of
template is that all the pieces have to fit in at the end, and I'm simply
not convinced that the plot twists en route can still hold up once
all the secrets have been revealed in this film. Neither that nor the poor
acting is the film's biggest problem, however, which would be that the
complex and confusing plot fills up a lot of running time which would have
been better served by some original and/or detailed characterization and
background for the cardboard characters. The only attempt the film made at
any characterization was to employ the oldest cliché in the cop film
playbook - the maverick cop who does things his own way and is always at
odds with his straighter-laced but less effective superior officer. With or
without that element, the characters in this film are simply there to take
up space until the next big switcheroo.
My gut tells me that Tuna's C- may be high, The film is ordinary, bland,
and cliched. On the other hand, "ordinary" does not equate to "awful" and
the film is not entirely without appeal, so I guess I have to second the
weak C-. It has two plusses: (1) I got involved trying to out-guess the
confusing twists and turns; and (2) it's always pleasant to see a beautiful
and famous woman naked, and Bo Derek is both very famous and very beautiful.
I guess that means the film meets the very minimum standard for a watchable
erotic thriller for people addicted to the genre.
I didn't duplicate Tuna's captures, which can be found in the February
18th edition, but I did make a
film clip of all the nudity.
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* Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).
* White asterisk: expanded format.
* Blue asterisk: not mine.
No asterisk: it probably sucks.
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OTHER CRAP:
Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles,
here.
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Heart of Midnight
Heart of Midnight is a 1988 psychological thriller/horror film starring
Jennifer Jason Leigh.
Leigh plays a woman with a phobia about being touched by men, and a history
of mental instability and substance abuse problems. As the story begins, her
leg is in a cast and she is living with her mother, but not happily. Her way
out comes with the news that her uncle has died leaving her the Midnight, a
nightclub currently being renovated, and enough money to finish the
renovation. Against her mother's advice, she decides to move into the club and
continue with the repairs. Before the film ends, she will be pushed to near
the breaking point, first by a gang rape, and then by strange occurrences in
the club, and she will ultimately learn unpleasant facts about her uncle.
Given her mental state, it is sometimes hard to tell what is real and what
isn't, and it is not clear at all whether she will succeed or not.
Despite that, I guessed most of the ending less than half way into the film,
but then I see a lot of movies. For those who get to the climax without
knowing too much already, it is probably a much more enjoyable watch.
310 IMDb readers have this at 5.1. Roger Ebert gave it 2.5 stars.
Variety praised the preformances, especially Leigh.
We will call it a C.
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Jennifer Jason Leigh shows her right
breast in a shower scene.
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Sweet Georgia
Having finished up the sexploitation western "The Ramrodder," we decided to
let the Time Machine takes us to 1972 and another in the genre, "Sweet
Georgia." (Here
are today's three clips)
We kick it off with Barbara Mills AKA Barbara Caron as she doffs her
clothes while out for some horseback riding in her full frontal fury.
  
Then she is joined by one of the sexploitation stars of the era Marsha
Jordan. Marsha rides up on her horse already stark naked. Back tomorrow with
lots more of Marsha.
  
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"The Hunger"
Episode: "The River of Night's Dreaming"
A prison transport van crashes into a river and Gena (Marnie
Thompson) swims to freedom, finding shelter in an old mansion, where she
is cared for by two women. Things start to go wrong when Gena finds out
that strange things are happening.
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Notes and collages
"Wonder Woman"
Part V concludes the Wonder Woman portion of the
Lynda Carter series ... but Lynda will be back
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L'Esperance
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The Motel
Do you remember what it was like to be 13? I do, and it sucked.
I haven't seen another movie which captures that better than 2005's
comedy/drama, The Motel.
Ernest lives and works at his mother's sleazy motel, where you can rent
rooms for as little as an hour. His job is to clean the rooms and work the
desk. Meantime, he's bedeviled by all the problems of being a 13-year-old
boy. He's also quite heavy, so he bears the additional burden of being a
target of bullies. To make matters worse, his mother is a harsh, critical
woman from China, who thinks only of the business.
This is a funny but heartwarming story that really accurately portrays
this difficult time in a young person's life.
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Cheryl Campbell |
Jackie Nova |
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Golden Girls
"From 1984, and part of the Golden Age of Porn, is the movie Golden
Girls, which is one of the most beautifully photographed porn films made
during the eighties. The story line was that a promoter (John Leslie)
invents a beauty contest where the contestants have to be nice to the
judges in order to win. It was filmed on location in San Francisco and had
two performances that were significant. First, Rachel Ashley's pairing
with John Leslie (five clips)
was the high point of her sexual career and she never looked or acted
better."
"The other performance was from Callie Aimes who shortly would
become known as Shauna Grant. She also had a beautiful scene with Leslie.
I will send that along in the next group."
... Magicman
Other Film Clips
Today's collection-builder is Kelly Lynch
Other Images
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I'm not sure what Sam Heuston is thinking
about here but, judging from the facial expression, I don't think Sam is
remembering the Alamo. |
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Shana Hiatt in a nudie video |
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Pat's comments in yellow...
A Fox News poll asked
Americans, if they had to pick a celebrity to be president, who would it be?
They were given a choice of six stars who have political leanings. 16 percent
couldn't bring themselves to vote even hypothetically for a celebrity and
picked "None of the above." Their #1 choice was Clint Eastwood (32 percent),
who edged out Oprah Winfrey by 2 points. In third place was Mel Gibson with 9
percent, then Angelina Jolie with 4 percent. The most outspoken liberals
fared worst: Sean Penn got just 3 percent, and dead last with 2 percent was
Barbra Streisand.
*
This is why Barbra prefers to run the government without asking the opinion of
the peasants.
The Wisconsin man who claims
he kicked in a neighbor's door and brandished a sword because he mistook the
sound of a porn DVD for a woman being attacked has a timing problem. The
neighbor said he doesn't want the man punished for doing what he thought was
the right thing, but the fact is that the DVD doesn't contain any female
screaming, just "hot chicks." Also, he watched it at 2:30 a.m., but the guy
didn’t kick his door down until 11:30 a.m., nine hours later.
*
Well, you can’t expect him to rescue women without getting a good night’s
sleep first!
Donald Trump is thinking
about where he'll spend eternity. Trump told the Newark Star-Ledger that he's
filed paperwork to build a wedding chapel on his golf course in Bedminster,
New Jersey, with plans to later turn it into a mausoleum for him and his
family. It's contingent on approval from the local planning board.
* I’m
sure after years of dealing with him, they’ll be happy to see him buried
anywhere.
*
This is very important to him because how often does he get to erect a big
monument with the name “Trump” on it?
*
He’ll be buried in New Jersey, but he’ll spend eternity in Hell…Same thing,
really.
Fox TV has hired the
writers of "Brokeback Mountain" to develop a new TV drama that will examine
urban and rural life
* It’s like “The Waltons,”
except the phrase “Goodnight, John-Boy” will have a whole different meaning
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