Biohazard (1984) is a Fred Olin Ray Alien rip off, and marks his first 35 mm film. His son played the rather pathetic space monster (see the upper left corner of the images). A top secret government experiment uses the psychic powers of Angelique Pettyjohn to summon space junk, hence the monster comes to Earth. He turns out to be small, fast, and deadly. She teams with the good guy, who has some undisclosed position with the government, to catch and stop the monster.
There is a short scene where two hobos are roasting dinner over a fire, and admit to an uninvited guest that they get their meat at the pond. A woman credited as Loren Crabtree shows breasts as a scream queen. My guess is that she has done other work under a different name, but she has no other credits at IMDB. Angelique Pettyjohn, who also shows breasts, had a long career that included some hard core as Angel St. Crois, horror, popular TV shows such as Get Smart, Batman and Hill Street Blues and stripping. She died young of breast cancer.
IMDB readers have this at 3.4 of 10. This is not Fred Olin Rays worst film, nor is it his best. It does have a surprise ending, but the $250K budget is clearly evident. This is a C- as a bad B movie. Compared to normal horror drama, it would score much lower.
Shades (1999) is a Belgian European co-production that tells the story of a film crew making a European Co-production of a biopic of a serial killer. Mickey Rourke is pretty good as the alcoholic director. Koen De Bouw plays a sleazy producer, and Andrew Howard plays a twisted method actor playing the lead. Investors suspect that the film is going to be more important than they thought, and start demanding a bigger cut, the star is nothing but trouble, and the serial killer comes up for parole during the filming. He becomes deeply interested in the script, and the press begins to make a big deal over the film.
The intent of the film is to show what a sleazy business movie making is, and it was not entirely ineffective. We had breast exposure from Mireille Leveque, Tine Raymer, and the stripper Mercedes. IMDB readers have this at 4.3 of 10. They did manage a surprise ending. They chose a very dark tint for the entire film, but the biggest problem was a script that was very boring and tedious for the most part. D.
"Can She bake a Cherry Pie"
Can She bake a Cherry Pie (1983) is a poor man's Woody Allen style romantic comedy made by Henry Joglam. It stars Martin Harvey Friedberg and Karen Black as the couple. As the film opens, Black's boyfriend moves out, and she and Friedberg pick each other up at a cafe. He is a compulsive neurotic, and she is as bad. As an idea, he keeps a pulse monitor clipped to his ear while having sex to judge his degree of love for her.
We get two quick peeks at one of Black's nipples. IMDB readers have this at 5.1 of 10. It takes place in Manhattan, much of it outdoors, and does portray New York of the era, including a Sheep's Meadow concert in Central Park. This is a very strang efilm, but did manage to hold my interest. C-.
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
Km. 0 (2000):
Kilometer Zero comes from the Spanish school of offbeat, sexually
polymorphous romantic comedies which combine sentimentality with
explicit sexuality, farce, and slapstick hijinks.
The name comes from a place in the
center of Madrid, kilometer marker zero, which I gather to be the
place which separates East and West, North and South, and from which
all distances are measured. I'm not really sure about that, but the
point is that it seems to be a common place to meet people that
you've never met before. So it happens that on a sweltering Summer
day in Madrid more than a dozen people say "meet me at Kilometer
Zero" to people they've never seen before.This encompasses computer
dates, cousins who don't know what the other looks like, a hooker
and her john, and so forth.
As so often happens in movieland, few
of the people ended up with the partners they originally intended to
meet, at least not at first. Multiple cases of mistaken identity led
to some silly situations. The kid who was to meet his sister's
friend found her surprisingly friendly, his surprise presumably
generated by the fact that he was coming in her mouth fifteen
seconds after they were first alone. Gee, guess who ended up with
The pair-ups encompass every possible
combination: straight, gay, pay for play, gay with straight, human
with angel, old with young. One couple even finds out they are
All in all, it's colorful, kinky, and
sentimental, as is typical of the films of
Yolanda García Serrano, who also wrote
Love Can Seriously Damage Your Health and Why Do They
Call It Love When They Mean Sex?
Based on this description, this is a C.
Moderately amusing, offbeat romantic comedy. Good enough,
successful at what it tries, but
not as good as implied by the 7.6 rating at IMDb.
I would have given it a C+, but I had to reduce the
score based on the Lou Diamond Phillips Rule. (Any film that
features the incredibly stacked and adorable Silke Klein and leaves
her clothes on deserves to be reduced, by the same logic as having
Richie Valens in the film and not letting him sing La Bamba.)
I haven't seen this film. I first heard about this
nude scene from Charlie, our resident French Cinema expert, and
these captures are taken from a video clip made by Shiloh, which can
be found in his section below.
Here's what you need to know. Western. Mixed cast of
Europeans and Americans. Oh, yeah. Did I mention Juliette Lewis
spreading her legs on camera?
Naked Protesters & Nude Activists. Public Nudity in the
- 5 New clips from
The Making of THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST.
FilmJerk reviews 'The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra.
Britney Spears in a thong
- Weekly World News says:
flabbergasted homeowners in seven states have awakened mornings to
find their front yards covered with hundreds of cheap plastic pink
flamingos -- and nobody knows who put them there."
Broadway By the Year samples The Musicals of 1926: "A
ducat for 'Broadway By the Year,' now in its fourth season, has
become the proverbial hot ticket. A capacity Town Hall aud
enthusiastically welcomed wunderkind writer-producer Scott Siegel,
who turned back the pages to 1926, when Calvin Coolidge was
president and 40 new musicals opened on Broadway."
"Taking the pill encourages women to have relationships with
inappropriate men." Being an inappropriate man, I
salute this marvelous tablet.
JoBlo has new Kill Bill 2 pics
The Z Review: Julia Roberts and Clive Owen filming some scenes for
Mike Nichols's new movie Closer.
In Polls, both Kerry and Edwards are leading President Bush.
The President, however, is still holding on to a 50-49 lead in a
theoretical head-to-head race against Sauron.
Matt Drudge vs The West Wing
Dean says he is winning in a parallel universe.
Apparently, he had to stay in the race here on Earth 1, as he
calls it, in order to avoid disturbing the time-space continuum.
This means he's still in it. “As my margins of victory on Earth II
approach 100% and my vote tallies on Earth I dwindle to zero,
there will be a crack in time and space and the two worlds will
Trisexual comedian Andy Dick goes wild on the row
- URL says it all:
Cloning breaks all Ten Commandments. And a mere nerdy
DNA scientist joins Colin Farrell in the "All Ten" club. Dick
Nixon is now regretting the fact that he honored his mother,
dropping him to third place all-time, at 9 1/2 commandments. Satan
is currently making a graven image, hoping to climb back into the
The Naked Women's Wrestling League comes to Pay Per View in April
2004. Find their home page at nwwl.com
He's a high school freshman. He's 6'6". He scores 44 points in a
32 minute game, as his Cincinnati prep school basketball team goes
- Arena Football Cheerleaders:
The Chicago Rush's Adreneline Rush Dancers.
Vida Guerra's home page. A
"We Hate The WNBA"
Can "brain fingerprints" determine whether you are guilty?
That certainly would be the case if your fingerprints are found on
a murdered man's brain.
Sex and the City: the movie??
- Now online:
sneak peeks at The Day after Tomorrow.
Gov. Perry (Texas) Sex Scandal Brewing? The
unsubstantiated internet gossip is that the governor's wife is
leaving him because she caught him smoking the White Owl with
another dude. No mainstream news source has picked it up.
Heather Mitts crowned "Hottest Female Athlete of 2004".
- Another classic Bushism!
"I am troubled by activist judges who are defining marriage. I
strongly believe marriage should be defined." I guess
he is trying to say that marriage should be precisely defined by
law and not by judicial interpretation. Either that, or he's
saying that marriage should be defined, but only if he gets to
write the definition. Maybe he should write that definition. Then
he would know the definition of at least one polysyllabic word.
Vinnie Barbarino turns 50, and
Mr Kotter returns to stand-up comedy, albeit sitting down.
Silent Bob will write and direct the Green Hornet movie.
- Coming Soon has posted the new international trailer for
- Two new clips from
Dean abandons quixotic bid for White House. He knew it
was over when Nader decided to run, thus siphoning off Dean's
much-needed support from the insane bloc.
- The distinguished Dr. Hunter S Thompson says
the President may be lying - about falling asleep before the Super
Bowl halftime : "Was he drunk? Does he fear the sight
of an uncovered nipple? Was he lying? Does he believe in his heart
that there are more evangelical Christians in this country than
football fans and sex-crazed yoyos with unstable minds?"
Guinness World Records - longest ear hair. As a dad, I
can relate to how his parents now feel - the heartbreak and
struggle of raising him was worth it.
- Mr Myagi hauls out the wax one more time:
Donald Rumsfield to star in The Karate Geezer
Supermodel Naomi takes privacy case to Britain's law lords.
So far, in her case against the Mirror, Naomi has been awarded
nothing, and has been forced to pay about a half million dollars -
the newspaper's legal costs - in addition to paying her own
Is Bill Bennett in the grip of an imminent dominatrix scandal?
Given that it's political season, you can bet that (a) the
accusation will be made, and (b) it will turn out to be baseless.
- "You're soaking in it".
Madge, the manicurist who used dishwashing detergent as pre-soak,
dies at 86.
Kerry wins Wisconsin as expected, but with a smaller margin than
anticipated. Edwards stays alive. As for Dean, he can
call in the hounds and piss on the fire, cuz the hunt is over.
The latest working links for the Paris Hilton
sex tape (in multi parts)
- The Atlanta Journal-Constitution is reporting that
Greg Maddux will sign a contract to pitch for the Chicago Cubs,
not the Yankees, and will report for work with the rest
of the Cubs' pitchers and catchers on Wednesday morning.
King Henry VIII was a soccer player. In fact, he the
only goalie in history who was never scored upon. Soccer experts
attribute that to
- the deference show him as king because of his penchant to
behead those who displeased him, and/or
- the fact that his body size was greater than the size of the
total goal area.
- It's time to play
Death to Celebrity Couples
Reality shows account for 11 of the top 20 TV shows.
Barry Bonds's personal trainer admitted to distributing steroids
to various (mostly unnamed) athletes, but says he has
now stopped. In other news, Bonds reported to Spring Training
weighing 135. Bonds was not mentioned by name in the public
documents, but Gary Sheffield was.
Conan O'Brien Issues a hilarious 'Apology' to Quebec.
(Much funnier than the original material he got in trouble for.)
Hollywood is buzzing that Clooney has offered Mike Tyson the Mr T
role in the A-Team movie. How could they offer this to
anyone but Ving Rheames? The Vinger was born for this moment. I
suppose Clooney's pal Brad Pitt will get offered "Face", but
likely turn it down. Jim Carrey would be the logical Murdock, and
Clooney himself would make a good Hannibal. Note to Hollywood: I
would go top the movie enthusiastically with those four guys in
the leads, although they would cost a mint unless they worked for
far less than their going rates.
- There is now a second online teaser from
Harry Potter and the Most Recent Thing He's Battling.
How low can they go? That's the question even seasoned
political observers are asking this week, as Democrats and
Republicans unleashed a series of commercials showing their
opponents digitally morphing into members of the embattled Jackson
archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
to submit a URL for inclusion in Other Crap
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
Words from Scoop.
.avi's from Shiloh.
.wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.
Two Must-See Items:
You read about Juliette Lewis's spread shot in
Blueberry. Now see it for yourself. (.avi version, .wmv version)
Rockbitch, those hard-rockin' Amsterdam carpet
munchers, actually do a lesbian fist fuck live on stage.
Shiloh's original six monute .avi wasn't a practical item for the
site, but here's the essence of it in a .wmv version.
Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble
with the codecs for these movies:
FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use
DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use
virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the
vids says the video codec: DivX Decoder Filter & audio
codec: Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with.
When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG
Layer-3. A friend of mine told me about compressing the
audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been
capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this
info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp &
asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using
camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could
never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost
too much to buy in my opinion.
A reader says:
You mentioned that some users were
having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool
designed to determine what codec is needed for a video.
http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you
or your users.
I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9.
The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in
the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly
larger, and slightly lower quality.
'Caps and comments by Brainscan:
I can just picture the meeting now. A producer
wannabe walks into the studio head's office and says,
"I want to make a movie just like Dumb and Dumber."
Studio guy asks, "You mean a prequel?"
And the wannabe replies, "Are you kidding me? No one
is that fucking stupid. This is a movie that takes
off from the last half of D & D, when the boys finally
reach Aspen and they find all that money and go out
and spend it on things like cars and hotel rooms and
"Sounds pretty funny to me," says studio guy.
"Well, it won't be a comedy. It's a gritty drama of
the mean streets and what money can buy."
"The mean streets? Of Aspen?"
"No, we'll move it to L. A. and have the boys go to
clubs and boff a bunch of chicks and buy a lot of
cars. Like twin Porsches and a muscle Mustang. But
the money is the Mafia's and they come to collect. So
what do you think?"
"Doesn't sound like much to me."
"Well we already contacted McQueen and Swayze and they
said they'd do it for scale."
"In that case, go for it. Here's a couple mil to get
you going. Call it "Money to Burn" or "The
Squanderers." Oh hell, use both."
Of course what the wannabe didn't make clear is that
the protagonists are played by CHAD McQueen, Steve's
son, and DON Swayze, Patrick's brother. Don looks
just like Patrick... if Patrick had been born and
raised in a trailer park on the outskirts of Bug
Tussle, Arkansas. He's got the mullet, the cheesy
goatee, the pencil neck... all the required equipment.
Chad, on the other hand, looks nothing like Steve,
acts nothing like Steve, does nothing like Steve. He
is to Steve McQueen and his acting what Ted Williams'
son was to Ted and his hitting. We're not talkin the
same ballpark, not the same league, not even the same
The story, as you might surmise, blows. So badly that
when it was clear the nekkid babe quotient had been
filled I turned off this toxic waste dump. Didn't
care what happened to the boys. Hoped, in fact, the
mafia dudes caught em and did a Braveheart on em. Not
the characters... the actors.
A couple of women show up and show off.
There is Julie Strain in a full-frontal performance.
This is pretty early in Julie's career and she looks
darn nice (not clear how early, though. IMDB says
1996, Bare Facts says 1994, but the credits say
1997... pick one, pick em all).
Ashlie Rhey is topless in the bath tub.
Melanie Good is sorta topless.
Kymberly Herrin (Hefmate for March 1981) gives good
face and a bit of cleavage. Kymberly is famous for
her face, having been the Dream Ghost in Ghostbusters
and the woman at the beginning of Romancing the Stone,
as the story written by Kathleen Turner's character is
played out on-screen.
In the end you would just have to say that someone got
taken with this movie. A few someones, in fact. The
studio head, for one, and anyone who has paid to watch
it, for two or maybe three.
A few .wmv files from the Ghost today.
- Carla Gugino, the "Spy Kids" mom topless and baring her bum in scenes from "Jaded" (1996).
- Heather Graham in her well lit and very beautiful topless scene from "Killing Me Softly"
- Jessica Paré, the busty young star topless in "Stardom" (2000)
- Sadie Frost, the UK actress flashes her breasts in "Crimetime". (1996).
- Virginia Madsen, baring a lovely breast in her film debut, the 1983 movie "Class".
- Jennifer Jason Leigh, topless in the pool house scene from the 1982 classic, "Fast Times at Ridgemont High".
- Phoebe Cates...of course you can't show any clips from "Fast Times..." without the scene.
|An awesome find by LC...Lewis going full frontal in scenes from the Euro movie "Blueberry" (2004), starring Vincent Cassel, Michael Madsen, Eddie Izzard, Djimon Hounsou, and one of the official French guys in American movies Tchéky Karyo. The movie is based on a Euro-comic and has some positive reviews at IMDb. No clue on whether or not it will play in the US.
|One of the contestants on the WB series "The Surreal Life". For my money, Trishelle isn't really a celeb since her claim to fame is doing MTV's "Real World: Las Vegas", which she later cashed in on by doing a spread in the bunny mag. But hey, she's on TV and I'm not, so what do I know. Anywho...she was topless on a recent episode and here are some uncensored 'caps.
|Another look at the Grammy winner almost falling out of her dress.
|More hardcore 'caps by Marvin from the good ol' days of porn. Here is one of the first female African American adult film stars in action. Scenes from the 1978 movie "Sex World".
|A couple of unknows from the ultra-low budget college comedy "Going Greek". Watch out for the amazingly bad impants from Unknown #2. 'Caps by Kitt.
|Señor Skin 'caps of the brunette babe showing off an excellent pair of robo-hooters in several scens from the Shannon Tweed movie "In the Cold of the Night" (1991)
|Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
Pat's comments in yellow...
PARIS HILTON'S LOVER RELEASED SEX TAPE
Song Of Salomon - The full-length version of the Paris Hilton sex tape hit
the Internet last week, and the New York Post's Page Six discovered who
released it: her lover from the video, Rick Salomon. Salomon said he
wouldn't have done it if Hilton's parents hadn't accused him of releasing
the earlier snippet and claimed he was a rapist. He said he wanted to
prove she was not drugged and joined in enthusiastically. Salomon said
he's making $50 every time someone buys it, and he plans to make a lot of
money and go surfing for a year. He added that Paris "will probably hate
me after this, but what are you gonna do?"
Personally, I see no other alternative.
He should be able to replace his relationship with Paris, now that he
has all those 50 dollar bills.
He was so offended at being accused of releasing part of the tape, he
had no choice but to release all of it.
Proof that all the money in the world can't buy a woman a decent guy.
JANET JACKSON'S FASHION LINE
It's All Out In The Open Now - Britain's Daily Star tabloid claims that
Janet Jackson hopes to cash in on her Super Bowl infamy by launching her
own line of sexy lingerie and jewelry, including leather bras, chastity
belts, and of course, nipple decorations. She reportedly told friends that
she wants "to bring to the world some of the pieces that I wear in my own
private life." She likes the word "exposed" for a name, so she's working
on variations, such as "Decent Exposure."
Or something equally sarcastic.
How about "OVER-Exposure"?
Hasn't she already brought to the world the intimate pieces she wears in
her private life?
Something tells me Janet doesn't wear a chastity belt in her private
So that wasn't a halftime show, it was a Super Bowl commercial for
CHRISTINA AGUILERA'S THONG FOR SALE
Love That Dirrty Water - Want to buy some unusual celebrity memorabilia?
In January, 2003, Christina Aguilera promoted her "Dirrty" video by posing
for Maxim magazine in a white thong in a pool of water. The thong and the
sealed tub of pool water that Christina squatted in were given to a British
DJ, and the seller obtained them from him and is offering them on eBay. Here's the Ebay link
This just in: they've been confiscated by the Department of Sanitation.
At least, the thong USED to be white.
It's the next best thing to having Christina come to your house and pee
in your own pool.
NO "RING OF FIRE" FOR HEMORRHOID ADS
It Didn't Sit Well - A Florida advertising producer's idea to use the
Johnny Cash classic "Ring Of Fire" in a hemorrhoid-remedy commercial has
been shot down by his family. The producer said she thought it was funny,
but Roseanne Cash called it moronic and demeaning. She said that "Ring Of
Fire" is "about the transformative power of love," and that's what it will
Except every time I hear it from now on, I'll think of hemorrhoids.
It's worse than moronic! It's asinine!
Still, there's nothing quite like the transformative power of a good
How about a subtler song, like, "I Don't Like It, But I Guess Things
Happen That Way"?
Christina Aguilera will sell them one of her songs.