"The Godson"

The Godson (1972) day two. Uschi Digard was the woman in this film that was already something of a name in B movies, and garnered a huge cult following. Lois Mitchell was a Bill Rotsler discovery, and he and Harry Novak thought she was going to be huge, which explains why she got a credit and was used in the opening titles. IMDB shows no other films for her, although I am pretty sure she worked in other Novak films. Harry has been quoted as saying that there is money in everything, which explains why he is a notorious pack rat. He has literally millions of one-sheets in mint condition from his films, and a huge collection of press kits, lobby cards, etc. He also has most of the props from his films. A big exception is the plant from "Please Don't Eat My Mother," which was stolen.

If I had to criticize this film, I would have preferred just a little more plot. I can't argue, however, with nearly a dozen women, most of them showing all three Bs, and simulated sex including near penetration, all in good light with a bright color palette, and all of this in an excellent DVD transfer. This is as good as exploitation/soft-core from the early 70's gets. C+.

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  • Jane Allyson (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17)
  • Lois Mitchell (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29)
  • Marie Arnold (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)
  • Orita De Chadwick (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23)
  • Unknown 1 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28)
  • Unknown 2 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • Unknown 3 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26)
  • Unknown 4 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16)
  • Unknown 5 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Movies 'n Stuff:

    8 Women (2002)

    What a strange picture this is. Start with a familiar premise: a man is found stabbed to death in a remote, snowbound country estate. The possible killers include eight women. During the course of the day, as they wait for the police to arrive, each of the women reveals disturbing secrets about their relationship with the deceased man, and each seems to be a suspect. Nothing unusual about that except for the fact that it's a musical farce! Six or seven times in the film, all the action stops so that somebody can sing a full-length song. There's a lot of entertainment in this crazy movie. See Catherine Deneuve hit an old lady over the head and roll her in the closet. See Fanny Ardant and Deneuve in a catfight. See eight classic beauties of the French cinema just have a good time acting hammy and obviously enjoying themselves. The situations are not meant to be taken seriously. Just about all the women have a sexual relationship with the dead man, and each other!

    The women in the cast encompass nearly the entire history of French cinema. Here are the seven most famous ones, and their birthdates:

    Danielle Darrieux 1917
    Catherine Deneuve 1943
    Fanny Ardant 1949
    Isabelle Huppert 1955
    Emmanuelle Béart 1965
    Virginie Ledoyen 1976
    Ludivine Sagnier 1979

    85 year old Danielle Darrieux made her first movie in 1931, about the same time as Humphrey Bogart. She made about 30 movies before Deneuve, the second-oldest star, was born!

    The director of the film is Francois Ozon. It wasn't so long ago that he was France's latest cinema wunderkind. He made his first film when he was 20. He's still only 35, and although he hasn't come up with a single great triumph to match his fellow boy genius, Orson Welles (Welles finished his first short, Hearts of Age, when he was 19, and had Citizen Kane in the can before he turned 27), Ozon's career output has been consistently good , and consistently improving. His last two films, this and Under the Sand, have been his most admired. I liked Under the Sand very much, but I'm not so sure about this one. Actually, I'm not sure how much the director really contributed to this film. The sets and costumes are bright and colorful, but you have to be aware that this was originally a stage play with a single set, so there's only so much that the director could have done with the film. It's not really a director's film, but a performer's showcase, and about half of the camera shots are either filmed musical numbers or facial close-ups. There are too many close-ups, but how could any man do otherwise when he has some of the greatest beauties in the world to photograph. (Especially the exotic Beart, who  looked incredibly seductive with blonde hair.)

    Sadly, there was not much nudity. The young 'uns kept their clothes on, and only 47 year old Isabelle Huppert showed any flesh, and that only a brief look at her butt from the side.

    It is scored 7.3 at IMDb, and received decidedly polarized reviews. James Berardinelli placed it in his top 10 films of the year. Ebert went for three stars, and Entertainment Weekly for a B. 78% of the reviews were positive, but the dissents were very strong dissents. Jonathan Foreman of the NY Post gave it one star, as did, and said only two stars out of five. Metacritic estimated that the average review was 64/100.

    I say it is a C+ - very original concept with a great cast and colorful photography, but it's a musical revue in French with subtitles, so it's only for a very tiny target audience. I wasn't much impressed with the music at all (I'm being charitable - it sucks, but I think it is deliberately bad - a bit of tongue in cheek campiness), but it's an entertaining farce if you can laugh at lines written in subtitles, and actually a pretty good whodunit underneath the jokes.

    Bloody Murder 2: Closing Camp (2003)

    Bloody Murder is more or less a rip-off of Friday the 13th. Kids at camp. Legend says that so-and-so murders people. So-and-so wears a hockey mask and kills the horniest campers in gruesome ways. Maybe I shouldn't say it's a rip-off of Friday 13th. Maybe it would be more accurate to say that it's a retro salute to the simple early films in the Friday 13th series, before they started sending Jason into dreams and hell and outer space.

    Anyway, it's a formula genre pic that went straight to video, starring unknowns. I didn't like it, but  I guess it's OK if you like that formula. Call it a "C-". It is rated 6.9/10 at IMDb, but that's just silly. I suppose it will settle down in the low 5s.

    I can't complain about having to watch it, however, because Tiffany Shepis was naked pretty much all of the time, and that's my favorite part of the Summer Camp Monster formula.


    Slaughter Rule (2002)

    This was entered in the dramatic competition at Sundance 2002, but failed to connect with a distribution channel. It has been seen on the Sundance Channel a few times, and is now available on DVD.

    It's sort of a sports story, but a very odd one. Gosling plays a kid who is cut from his high school football time. Morse recruits him to play roughneck six-on-six football in money games. This is a sport played by guys who just love to play ball. They play in the snow, in windy open fields, where the crowd is sitting in cars on the sidelines. They play for pride, and a sense of accomplishment, and the sense of comradeship, and maybe because they are more than a little crazy.

    Don't think it's going to be one of those stirring stories like Hoosiers. These guys don't always win. Some days they have to struggle mightily to avoid losing early on the so-called "slaughter rule", which says that the game is called if either team falls behind by 45. Not only that, but Morse, as the coach, turns out to have some very dark secrets.

    It's a typical indy film, in that the director is expressing a unique personal voice that would not appeal to a broad audience. It is very well made. It features some of the most impressive cinematography I've ever seen, and two convincing performances from Ryan Gosling and David Morse. I admired it very much, but I didn't really enjoy watching it, and the subject matter is about as far from the mainstream as possible. (How about the cares of the homosexual homeless - obscure enough for you?)

    By the way Morse sings some country songs, and he is quite good. He's 6'4", bulky and heavily-muscled, maybe 260 pounds, and it's incongruous to hear his sweet, soft, lyrical voice.

    No major critics have reviewed it. The reviews at MRQE average about two and a half stars. It is 5.9/10 at IMDb, which seems a bit too low to me. I call it a C+ - outstanding film in many ways, but way of the beaten path, and virtually unmarketable.

    • Kelly Lynch - all you can see is the top of her butt-crack.


    All or Nothing (2002)


    The first half of All or Nothing is a bleak look at the everyday lives of the English working classes. David Spall plays a taxi driver who lives in a dreary housing project, trapped in a loveless marriage, raising two obese children. (It may have the ugliest cast ever assembled. How does People Magazine overlook Spall year after year when they choose the world's sexiest man?)

    It's fundamentally a slice of life drama. The lives of this family and their neighbors seem hopeless and loveless until a medical emergency in the second half forces them to look at each other in a new light.

     Roger Ebert gave this film the rare four stars. It's a 7.4 at IMDb, and got 83% positive reviews.

    I think it is a film that feels completely real from start to finish. It's like watching a documentary. It is an unpleasant documentary for the most part, but the ending keeps it from being entirely hopeless. I call this one a C+ as well. It's an excellent piece of realistic drama with true-to-life characterizations, but frankly not that many people will enjoy this kind of film.

    Quite a good topless scene from Sally Hawkins, who is now in the sapphic mini-series, Tipping the Velvet

    • Sally Hawkins (1, 2, 3)


    Forget about this war debate that's happening in the world. Here's an issue really worth debating. Who has the biggest breasts in women's tennis?

    SI's new cover girl is a frequent runway mannequin. Here are some pictures of her breasts without a swimsuit.

    • Petra Nemcova (1, 2, 3, 4)


    Other crap:



    What're the odds?

    What is the over/under for the number of games won for selected major league baseball teams?

    • Yankees 99
    • A's 93.5
    • Red Sox 92 (Intertops say they are the third best team in baseball, but will not win a division, thanks to you-know-who being in the same division)
    • Brewers 63
    • Rangers 80.5 (They expect the Rangers to play .500 ball? In that division? I may take an under on that bet, because I'll sure be surprised to see them go 81-81)



    Here are the latest movie reviews available at

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    'Caps and comments by Turtle:

    Here is the second part of the March FHM Baywatch scans series:

    In addition, hot off the presses, pictures of Desiree from this week's Interviu issue. Known to the Spanish public as "Desy", she is the sweet 26-year old Swiss bartender/nurse who was the finalist on the fourth edition of Big Brother Spain which just ended last month.

    • Desy posing topless (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    Diane Lane Another great collage by Dann, featuring Lane showing breasts, bum and a few upskirts in scenes from "Unfaithful" (2002).

    Izabella Scorupco The model, actress and Bond babe posing partially nude. Very nice side breast exposure in this scan by Squiddy.

    Jaime Pressly The sexy blonde actress that seems to always play white trash hotties. Here she is posing nude and showing off her fantastic backside.

    Leah Remini
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Looking very hot in a bikini top from Monday night's episode of "King of Queens". Thanks to Applecot for the 'caps.

    Runway models
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

    Assorted runway babes showing off their A cups on the catwalk.

    Julie Strain
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)

    Topless, full frontal and rear nudity from the sequel that begged to be made..."The Bare Wench Project 2: Scared Topless"! Hey Big Julie fans, don't forget the 3rd installment..."The Bare Wench Project 3: Nymphs of Mystery Mountain"! Thanks to Señor Skin.

    The Funnies
  • Great Sign! Do you think this could be Dick Cheney's undisclosed location?