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            The Baby of Mācon (1993): 
            
            
            
            
            
            
            
      
  
            
            
            
            
            
            Of all I have read about this film, the best 
            summary is what Tuna wrote  some time ago: 
            
            
            
            
            
            
            
      
  
            
            
            
            
          The Baby of Mācon (1993) is Peter 
          Greenway's strangest and most controversial film, and that is saying a 
          lot.  
          Critical opinion ranges from 
          "brilliant and possibly his best", through "he went a little too far", 
          all the way to "absolutely disgusting garbage". Frequently, when it 
          has been shown in theaters, a large part of the audience has left the 
          theater. It screened a few times in the US, but was too controversial 
          to find a distributor. It has just been released on video for the 
          first time in Australia. Although it is in PAL format, there is no 
          region code, so those of you who use a computer to watch DVDs can see 
          it. 
           
          Since most of you are unlikely to see the film, I will write a 
          thorough plot summary. If it is something you might want to see, be 
          advised that it includes major spoilers. 
          A troupe is presenting a play in the palace of the Medicis in the 17th 
          century. They provided entertainment for Medici so he wouldn't have to 
          leave the palace and risk foul play from the rabble outside. The play 
          concerns a perfect baby born of a very old, ugly woman. The baby's 
          grown sister, Julia Ormond, decides the baby is much too pretty to be 
          from the old woman, and decides to say it is hers, and that it was a 
          virgin birth. At the time of the birth, the city of Mācon was 
          experiencing plague and famine, and the women were barren, which made 
          the birth all the more miraculous. Ormond decides to put on a Madonna 
          and Child act, and trades the baby's blessings for favors. Even though 
          this is obvious exploitation of the baby, the blessings seem to lift 
          the curse that has been on the city. 
          The local bishop, however, who wants to regain the church's power, 
          sends his son the scientist, Ralph Fiennes, to disprove her claims. 
          His position is that she is either a liar, and not the baby's mother, 
          or a whore who had the baby out of wedlock. Ormond decides to seduce 
          Fiennes, proving her virginity in the process. She arranges the whole 
          seduction scene in a stable, with the baby in a manger. At this point, 
          the baby, who realizes that his power depends on her status as a 
          virgin, demonstrates magical power, and uses a cow to gore Fiennes to 
          death. The bishop swears revenge on her, and declares that she is too 
          evil to raise this miraculous child, so makes him a ward of the 
          church. 
           
          The church exploits the child far more than Ormond ever did, 
          auctioning his bodily excretions and secretions to the highest bidder 
          as holy relics. Ormond strangles the child in a blanket to get even. 
          The bishop wants her hanged, but there is a law against hanging 
          virgins. Then Medici, who isn't really clear as to whether this is a 
          play or real, and has joined in from time to time, suggests that they 
          put her in the custody of his palace guards, bless them, and have them 
          rape her, thus making her eligible for hanging. The bishop uses some 
          convoluted logic, and figures out that she should be raped well over 
          200 times. It is here that audiences tend to leave the theater. We 
          see, or rather hear, the first 16 of the rapes, which actually take 
          place behind a curtain. Nobody told the guards that this was a play, 
          so they actually rape her, and, at the end, she is dead. The public, 
          now deprived of the blessings of the child, divide his clothes, then 
          carve him up into relics to give them good luck. 
           
          End Spoilers 
          Greenway shows sex in a non-erotic way here, and the rape is clearly 
          all violence and no titillation at all, even though we see lengthy 
          full-frontal and nude rear shots from Ormond. He is satirizing any 
          number of things, including divine intervention, the virgin birth, and 
          17th century politics and economics. He definitely pulled out all the 
          stops here. For me, by the time we got to the rape and mutilation 
          scenes, I was emotionally numb, and was not especially affected by 
          them. For me, it was a little hard to follow, especially since 
          Greenaway intentionally blurred the boundaries between the play and 
          real life, and certainly not a fun watch. It was very powerful, 
          however, and I can always count on Greenaway to show me something very 
          different.  
            
            
            
            
            
            
            
      
  
            
            
            
            
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            Here are my own thoughts: 
            
            
            
            
            
            
            
      
  
            
            
            
            
          Tuna's description of the plot is as good as any. Frankly, I'm not 
          too sure what was happening because of the convoluted structure of 
          placing a play within a play within a film, and because it is never 
          really clear who is in the play and who in the audience, nor where the 
          stage actually ends. The audience watching the play makes a good 
          example. Are they part of the play, or are they really supposed to be 
          in the audience as spectators? I got the impression that the royal 
          ugly dudes were the only real audience, and that everyone else was 
          part of the cast, including the "audience." That would explain why the 
          members of the audience always responded conveniently on cue. Or 
          perhaps that was just a touch of surrealism. Then there was the dense, 
          naive DeMedici. Is he a character in the play, or are they performing 
          the play for him? If the latter, then why does he seem to think the 
          play is real? Are we supposed to believe he is that stupid? Or maybe 
          he isn't that stupid, since a lot of the things in the play are real, 
          like the death of several actors in character. Perhaps the royal ugly 
          dude is the only one who understands that the line between stagecraft 
          and reality is a blurry one at best. 
          And so forth ... 
          And then, if the whole baby thing is a fake to begin with, all 
          engineered by the sister, then how does it happen that the baby really 
          has magic powers and can command the ox to kill Ralph Fiennes? And if 
          the baby has those magic powers, why doesn't he use them to prevent 
          being killed? 
          Probably the strangest thing in the entire film is the entire 
          premise of the first scene. The whole legend of the blessed baby is 
          generated because the crowd can't believe that such an ugly mother 
          could give birth to such a beautiful baby. Huh? But, but, but ... 
          Julia Ormond is the baby's sister, so the same mother gave birth to 
          Julia, didn't she? I've noticed that Julia looks pretty decent, so why 
          did the crowd expect any major change from her younger brother? 
          The entire film is filled with those sorts of "suspension of 
          disbelief" issues, and the line between the play and reality is 
          confusing even when it is explained. Julia Ormond is actually playing 
          an actress who is playing the sister of the baby, right? So how do the 
          other actors, obviously jealous of her, coax a convincing performance? 
          When the time comes for the rape scene, the two hundred actors 
          actually rape her, thus assuring that her acting in that scene will be 
          credible. Of course, this kills her but, what the hell, I guess they 
          don't have to do a matinee the next day, and she probably has an 
          understudy, although I have to think the understudy might have grave 
          doubts about stepping into the role, given what happened to Julia. One 
          thing that was very interesting was the fact that the last few rapists 
          didn't seem to notice that she was dead, so I infer  that she 
          didn't die in the middle of the process, or even after the 205th guy, 
          but waited until all 206 were finished.  
          Kinda thoughtful. 
          Oh, well, what can you say? Peter Greenaway lives in his own world. 
          He makes slanted, odd, personal films very similar to the 
          "underground" films that I used to watch in Greenwich Village in the 
          late 60s, except that those Village People didn't have the budget to 
          hire big stars and create elaborate 17th century costumes for a cast 
          of hundreds. Although his films feature extensive male and female 
          frontal nudity, cannibalism, infanticide, explicit gore, and 
          (arguably) the exploitation of child actors, Greenaway is an aesthete, 
          not an exploitation filmmaker. He is obsessed with perspective, 
          clutter, lighting, symmetry, decay, numbers, and the mystical power of 
          counting. The frames of this film about the 17th century look 
          remarkably like the paintings of the same era, and attempt to recreate 
          the techniques used in that century to simulate depth on a flat 
          canvas. (Greenway himself is a serious student of art.) 
          How many other directors consistently feature classical music, 
          Renaissance aesthetics, and cannibalism together in one place? Ol' 
          Peter Greenaway is truly one of a kind. 
          One thing which astounds me is that he always seems to manage to 
          get people to pay for his films, even though his previous ones never 
          seem to have sold any tickets. The Baby of Macon didn't even get the 
          customary two week run in a few arthouse venues in the United States. 
          Given its ability to attract controversy without attracting ticket 
          buyers, it disappeared within a week from the very few theaters daring 
          enough to screen it. In some places it was shown a single time (see 
          the review in the Washington Post). Yet the opinion of Greenaway in 
          the artistic community is so reverential and there is so much prestige 
          in working with him, that various art subsidies and national film 
          boards consistently pony up the guilders and pounds he needs to keep 
          producing his small-audience masterpieces. 
          I did read several comments and reviews about this film, but I 
          never encountered any balanced viewpoints except Tuna's. The rest of 
          the people either said that the film is disgusting and vile, or else 
          said that they despaired for any culture that does not instantly 
          enshrine Greenaway as its resident genius, and that the people who 
          find him disgusting are themselves disgusting and repressed and 
          juvenile.  
          Frankly, I think every one of them is all wet.  
          Greenaway is one of those people who reaches for the stars. He 
          tries to make profound points in very powerful and dramatic ways, by 
          using the unusual combination of shock and highbrow aesthetics. The 
          fact that he is an aesthete does not mean he walks on water. One 
          cannot confuse good intentions with execution, just as one cannot 
          assume that every film about the holocaust is a masterpiece. Sometimes 
          Greenaway succeeds, sometimes not. The people who offer him 
          unqualified praise fail to see the glaring failures in his films. I 
          have no objection to his use of surrealism, his destruction of the 
          fourth wall, his obsessions, or his extensive use of nudity and 
          violence. I also appreciate his extensive preparation and his use of 
          the techniques of painting to manufacture unique cinematic images. I 
          admire his willingness to choreograph complicated scenes, rehearse 
          them extensively, and film them in an uninterrupted single take. On 
          the other hand, I often find him high-handed, pretentious, repetitious 
          without justification, and just plain boring. Furthermore, I do not 
          share any of his obsessions. If I had to sit next to this guy at a 
          dinner party, I would try desperately to switch seats, even though I 
          might admire him from afar. 
          This particular film has a lot of his strengths and a lot of his 
          weaknesses. It has a lot of the pretentiousness of Prospero's Books 
          and the unrelenting tedium of The Draughtsman's Contract. On the other 
          hand, it has some of the brilliant visual composition of The Cook, the 
          Thief, His Wife and Her Lover or A Zed and Two Noughts, some of the 
          camera wizardry of Prospero's Books, and some of the perfectly 
          realized aesthetics of The Pillow Book. 
          Let us be frank. Greenway's films are brilliant, but aloof. 99% of 
          the people in the world will hate every Greenaway film, even the most 
          accessible ones. The odds are if you are not turned off by his subject 
          matter, you'll be confused by his complexity, or you'll fall asleep 
          when he starts in with the slow, plodding, music and the endless 
          repetition. Even among those in the remaining one percent of the world 
          - filmgoers who like some Greenaway films - 99% of them will hate this 
          one, which combines all of his worst excesses in one script, even 
          though it also features some of his best achievements as well. On the 
          other hand, you may be the one in ten thousand who really craves 
          sharing this intense personal film-making experience, and will 
          appreciate the many and varied talents he puts on display in this 
          film. 
          I am not one of those. 
          I did make the first cut. I like some Greenaway films. I like 
          Pillow Book and Drowning by Numbers, for example, and I'm glad I 
          watched many of the others. But this one  ... meh! I love Julia 
          Ormond, and I watched it to see her stark naked. If there had been no 
          nudity, I would have shut it off after about ten minutes, not because 
          I was shocked, but because I was bored to tears. That's what I did 
          with The Draughtsman's Contract, absent any meaningful nudity. Why 
          pretend otherwise? 
            
            
            
            
            
                Nudity: 
            
            
            
            
            
                There is a lot of nudity from extras and unknowns. A lot. 
                Especially male frontals. The key nudity is, of course, full 
                frontals from the two young stars, Ralph Fiennes and Julia 
                Ormond, neither of whom had yet hit the big time. Greenaway's 
                timing was uncanny. One year later he could not have gotten 
                those two to do extensive frontal nudity on camera. Fiennes 
                would become a mega-star in his very next film (Schindler's 
                List), and Ormond would hit the A-list the very next year by 
                playing Brad Pitt's co-star in Legends of the Fall, then 
                following soon after with the Audrey Hepburn role in the remake 
                of Sabrina. 
            
            
            
            
            
                
                  - Julia Ormond 
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            Other Crap: 
            
            
            
            
            
            
            
      
  
            
            
            
            
              
            
              - Got a half million bucks sitting around?
              
              
              FOR SALE: "Climax World Famous Gentleman's Club and world's only 
              nude drive-thru"
 
              - Remember Eucalyptus, the low budget Australian film which was 
              to pair Russell Crowe and Nicole Kidman when the two big stars 
              agreed to do it for the good of the Aussie film industry? Well, 
              you can just forget that co-operative and altruistic bullshit, cuz
              
              
              Russell is feeding Eucalyptus to the koalas.
              
                - I love the last paragraph of the story: The movie was to 
                have been shot in Bellingen, New South Wales. Local Buffalo 
                O'Brien said yesterday: "People around here are a bit 
                disappointed, but mostly they just shrug their shoulders and go, 
                'Oh well, that's just Hollywood types being a bunch of whingeing 
                sooks'." 
 
               
               
              - 
              
              Iverson scores 60 for the home crowd.
 
              - 
              
              Overall, 65% of all Americans favor schools teaching creationism, 
              including 37% who want creationism taught instead of evolution.
 
              - 
              
              Rhodes mayor wants to rebuild the Colossus, a wonder of the 
              ancient world
              
                - I always wondered what qualified this as a freakin' 
                "wonder". It was a big statue that fell down 60 years after it 
                was built. Maybe the third-rate architects had a 
                disproportionately powerful voice in the Ancient Wonders 
                Academy. 
 
                - By the way, do you know of the pictures of ships sailing 
                between the legs of the Colossus to enter the harbor? That's 
                imaginary stuff created centuries later. The original was a 
                regular old large statue on a platform, about the same size as 
                Liberty in New York harbor.
 
               
               
              - 
              
              Gondoliers on strike. And they are on strike for 
              longer hours! (They want to discuss other subjects as well, 
              like splinter-free poles. Oh, and the heavier ones want to wear 
              vertical stripes to look slimmer.)
              
              
                
 
              - 
              
              Another Jessica Simpson bikini pic from Dukes of Hazzard. Top 
              quality.
 
              - 
              
              'The Aviator' wins best picture at the BAFTA awards. 
              There was no Eastwood/Scorsese competition in the U.K., however, 
              as Mike Leigh won best director for Vera Drake. The screenplay 
              awards went to Eternal Sunshine and Sideways. The acting awards 
              went to Staunton, Foxx, Owen, and Blanchett. 
 
              - 
              
              The Angelina Jolie homewrecker rap
 
              - 
              
              Democratic party officially surrenders future elections. 
              Looks like they're really going to install Screamin' Howie 
              as party chairman, hoping to put the "party" back into the Party!! 
              He'll have a tough battle to win the hearts and minds of the 
              centrist swing voters who decide the elections. As one party wag 
              said, "The image of the party and of Dean has shifted so far left 
              they look at us as the Haight-Ashbury of parties. There's a 
              perception that he's Ken Kesey."
 
              - Forget the friggin' Oscars, here are the results you've been 
              waiting for: 
              
              The 2004 Corndog Styling Competition Winners! 
 
              - 
              
              A new still from Revenge of the Sith.
 
              - 
              
              Letterman's "Top Ten Signs You're In A Bad Relationship"
              
 
              - 
              
              New York buzzing over Christo's latest crazy scheme: 'Gates'
              
 
              - 
              
              Connecticut Bar to Host Naked Karaoke Contest. If 
              you're near Berlin, Connecticut, and you've always wanted to get 
              drunk and sing naked or even to watch other drunks sing naked, 
              last night (Saturday) was your night.
 
             
            
            
            
            
            
            
            
      
  
            
            
            
            
            
              
            
            
            
            
            
            
            
      
  
            
            
            
            
            
            
            
            Other Crap archives . May also include newer material than the 
            links above, 
            since it's sorta in real time.
              
        
            
            
           
            
              
        
            
            
           
       
            
            
      
            
            
       
             
            
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            here 
            to submit a URL for Other Crap  
              
        
            
            
           
            
              
        
            
            
           
       
            
            
      
            
            
       
             
            
              
        
            
            
           
           
             
            
            
           
       
            
            
      
            
            
       
             
            
              
        
            
            
           
         MOVIE REVIEWS: 
             
            
            
            
              
        
            
            
           
       
            
            
      
            
            
             
            
            
            Here 
            are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com. 
              
            
              - The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the 
              review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
 
              - If there is a white asterisk, it means that 
              there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined 
              there might be something else of interest.
 
              - A blue asterisk indicates the review is written 
              by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
 
              - If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too 
              ashamed to admit it.
 
             
            
            
            
                   
            
            
  
 
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