"Logan's Run"

Logan's Run (1976) was nominated for two Oscars for Art Direction and Cinematography. It received other nominations and awards, but none for acting or directing or script. It earned $25M against a $9M budget, but has fallen to 6.5 at IMDB. It enjoys a 73% positive at Rotten Tomatoes. The big news is an amazing amount of nudity for a PG rated film. Jenny Agutter, as the female lead, shows breasts and buns, and a hint of bush getting out of wet clothes, and several unknowns show everything in an orgy scene, and frozen in ice tombs.

In the post apocalyptic future, everyone lives in the city with nothing to do but play all day. No disease, no work, all sex and games. The only rub is that when one is born, one must die. Hence, everyone dies on their 30th birthday. The few who can't get behind the death part and try to escape are called runners. They are shot by "Sandmen," and the male lead, Michael York, is one of the Sandmen. He is sent to uncover the sanctuary cult, rumored to be people that have escaped, and his life clock is advanced to make him look like a runner.

It is not a comfortable feeling for him, so he elects to escape for real, and to take Jenny Agutter with him for obvious reasons, which she shows in the undressing scene. When he learns the truth, he decides they have to return to the city and save everyone. This was not my first time through the film, and being familiar with the story line let me watch a little more critically, and the script is not very tight. They encounter an "old man" outside, but no data is given as to why he, and only he, was alive. Washington DC is overgrown with ivy, but there is no damage to monuments, thus we wonder what catastrophe caused most of civilization to vanish. In the happily ever after ending, the people of the city learn the truth and repopulate the Earth. But remember, they used to spend all of their time having sex, but babies were created in test tubes, and no birth control devices or medications were ever mentioned. At any rate, Sci Fi fans will enjoy it. The transfer is a little grainy, I suspect because it was shot that way. It is a little long at 120 minutes. The film works best as an actioner inside the city, and goes downhill when they escape. C.

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  • Jenny Agutter (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19)
  • Unknown (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

    "Nowhere To Run"

    Nowhere to Run (1993) is a Jean-Claude Van Damme vehicle. In other words, he alone takes on the evildoers and emerges victorious in defense of the fair maiden, Rosanna Arquette. The details matter little, but here goes. His brother engineers a break for him from a prison bus, but is killed in the process. Van Damme was serving a sentence for something his brother had done. He elects to camp out on private property, and ends up tangled up with Rosanna and her two children, who are under attack from the nastiest land developer in history. The ending is predictably Van Damme victory, but the epilogue has him being returned to jail for a small dose of reality.

    Arquette shows everything in a undressing for the bath scene, and breasts in a dark but lengthy sex scene with Van Damme. This is a case where you need to watch both the wide screen and full screen versions to see all of the skin. Both are provided on the two-sided DVD. It is currently rated an appropriate 4.4 at IMDB, but grossed an impressive $22.2M against an unknown budget. Ebert gives 1 1/2 stars, and Berardinelli two stars. I say C-. A Van Damme film is almost its own genre, and the plots are pretty much all the same, but this one was especially cliche ridden.

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  • Rosanna Arquette (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)


    Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the ones above, since it's sorta in real time.

    Click here to submit a URL for inclusion in Other Crap




    Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.


    Words from Scoop.

    .avi's from Shiloh.

    .wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.


    1. What more is there to say about Jennifer Connelly? She's gorgeous, she has an Oscar, she's ever so vulnerable, she's the most popular woman in the history of internet nudity, she's our own officially anointed queen, and she has just about the greatest breasts in the history of mammals. Here she is in The Hot Spot.. (.avi version, .wmv version)

    2. Speaking of Oscars, did you know that Marsha Mason never won one. At one point she was nominated four times in a nine year span, but she never came home with the hardware. She did only sporadic nudity in her career, although she looked most excellent with her shirt off. Here in The Image, she was 48 years old and she still had the breasts of a teenager. In fact, the rest of her also aged well, nd she looked great for 48, just as good as two decades earlier. (.avi version, .wmv version)

    3. I made a capture from the Marsha Mason video, because the quality was excellent for a TV capture, and this was underrepresented in our archives.

    4. Kate Beckinsale, now a huge star with no recent nudity, had a different attitude in her salad days. Here she is, age 20 and topless,  in 1994's Uncovered. This clip came from a German TV broadcast. This film is finally coming to DVD in about a month or so, so stay tuned for more. (.avi version, .wmv version)

    Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble with the codecs for these movies:

    Shiloh says:

    FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the vids says the video codec:  DivX Decoder Filter & audio codec:  Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with. When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG Layer-3.  A friend of mine told me about compressing the audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
    When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp & asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost too much to buy in my opinion.

    A reader says:

    You mentioned that some users were having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool designed to determine what codec is needed for a video. http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you or your users.

    Scoop says:

    I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9. The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly larger, and slightly lower quality.

    Grammys Stuff
    • Beyoncé Knowles, winner of 5 Grammys on Sunday, showing some legs, cleavage and some "booty". (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

    • The not-so-bright Jessica Simpson showing off a bunch of cleavage. (1, 2, 3, 4)

    • Jennifer Love Hewitt's breasts make a comeback. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)

    • Paris Hilton

    • Alicia Keys

    • Marg Helgenberger, the "C.S.I." star looking fantastic and showing some cleavage.

    • Madonna cleavage

    • A very curious pair of presenters, Gwen Stefani and Quentin Tarantino

    • Hilary Duff...looks like her actual dress wasn't ready, so she just wrapped herself in a pink terrycloth towel instead. (1, 2)

    'Caps and comments by Dann:

    "Flesh + Blood"
    In 1985, Jennifer Jason Leigh had the classic body you see in old world paintings and sculptures. Maybe not great by today's standards, but classic nevertheless. She was perfectly cast as the intended bride of a noble lord in 1501 Western Europe. I personally don't like her as a blond, but the filmmakers were thorough: her eyebrows and even her pubic hair were dyed in order to make her look like a natural blond because let's face it, they didn't have hair dye back then.

    The film tells of mercenaries who, after winning a battle for their lord, are betrayed and cast out without being paid. Needless to say, they want revenge.

    Lots of good fight scenes and a very good job by the actors and director Paul Verhoeven who also co-wrote the movie. Plenty of nudity and sexuality, but still a very well done action/adventure, which I recommend.

    'Caps and comments by Oz:

    There's the briefest of nipple peek by Kristin Scott Thomas in Framed.

    • Kristin Scott Thomas (1, 2)

    "Waiting to Exhale"
    Plenty of sexy caps of Angela Bassett and Lela Rochon in Waiting to Exhale. No nudity but it sure looks like Lela is showing a bit more.

    Susan Sarandon doesn't wear a bra in Tempest and spends a substantial amount of time in her underwear. There are plenty of pokies and a nice view down her shirt. Pokies by Molly Ringwald and Lucianne Buchanan.

    Some sexy caps of Julia Stiles in the thoroughly boring, Ethan Hawke version of Hamlet.

    Millicent Sheridan bares her behind in Casino and there's an upskirt by Sharon Stone, but she's wearing knickers.

    Some very sexy caps of Laura Dern in Focus.

    • Laura Dern (1, 2)

    "Point Break"
    Toplessness plus some brief bush by Julie Michaels in Point Break, and a rear shot of Lori Petty. Some actress, whose name I couldn't fathom, looks good in a thong.

    • Julie Michaels (1, 2, 3)
    • Lori Petty (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
    • Unknowns (1, 2)

    Nicole Kidman
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

    Showing off her first class posterior in scenes from "Birthday Girl" (2001). 'Caps by Watty.

    Moira Kelly
    (1, 2, 3)

    Señor Skin 'caps of the former "West Wing" co-star topless in scenes from the far too weird to be entertaining David Lynch movie "Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me" (1992).

    Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    Not Your Grammy's Nipples - The five-minute tape delay at the Grammy Awards seemed to inhibit the behavior. The only unusual moments were Coldplay's Chris Martin urging America to elect Kerry, Christina Aguilera clutching her wide-open dress to avoid a Janet Jackson moment, and Justin Timberlake apologizing before accepting a Grammy, saying, "What occurred was unintentional, completely regrettable, and I apologize if you guys are offended."

  • It WAS regrettable, and I AM offended by Justin Timberlake winning a Grammy.
  • And he was extra-careful not to expose his nipples.
  • You know the Grammys have changed when Christina Aguilera wears clothes at all.
  • Madonna told Chris Martin that Wesley Clark is much more spiritually-evolved than Kerry, then kicked him in the nuts.
  • Americans WANT advice on picking their leader from a foreigner married to a woman who fled America because it's too patriotic.
  • The only shocking moment came when a Grammy spokesman claimed that most of last night's performers studied music in school.

    At Least Come Hang Out Backstage - Fox News' Roger Friedman reports that CBS did invite Janet Jackson to appear on the Grammy Awards, but only if she'd apologize for her Super Bowl appearance. Her brother Michael advised her to "stop apologizing already," so she rejected their invitation.

  • She actually did something more stupid than stripping at the Super Bowl: she took career advice from Michael Jackson!
  • Janet would've accepted their invitation, but she had a falling-out.

    Our Clothes HAVE To Stand Up To Abuse! - The New York Post reports that the owners of DeMask, a Manhattan fetish wear shop that made Janet's costume, are furious at her claim that her wardrobe "malfunctioned." They say they make "solid, long-lasting pieces," and the only way it could have ripped is if she replaced the studs in the rubber with snaps. He said if Justin had tried to rip it before it was modified, it would have looked like an assault.

  • If Justin tried to rip anything thicker than a piece of typing paper, it would look like an assault.
  • Her costume was rubber: anyone who really tried to assault her would bounce right off.
  • Michael advised Janet to reply, "I'm rubber, you're glue..."
  • See, if she'd just worn the original rubber-and-stud fetish wear at the Super Bowl Halftime show, it would've been perfectly appropriate!

    Nip This Trend! - Shops that sell piercings and nipple jewelry report a big surge in customers since the Super Bowl.

  • Because you never know when you might run into Justin Timberlake in front of 90 million people.
  • Of course, it could just be because of Valentine's Day.

    QUOTE OF THE DAY! Columnist Leonard Pitts called Janet's flash "cheap, calculated shock...the kind of idea you get when you have no ideas," concluding, "So the headline here is not that a woman exposed a breast. It is, rather, that a breast exposed a woman."

    Like Hiring Ray Charles To Paint A Portrait - Gawker.com reports that Paris Hilton is pushing a proposal for a book called "Tongue In Chic: Paris Hilton's Confessions of an Heiress." Ghostwriter Merle Ginsburg writes that Paris "may not know rocket science, but she knows the science of love like few women her age" and will offer her "sage" advice about getting and keeping a boyfriend.

  • Chapter One: Buy A Camcorder.
  • If you want to know how she keeps a boyfriend, skip the book and see the video.

    ...Other tips it will contain include "Diet Coke is for fat people" and "Figure out how to become tall and lanky and never gain weight."

  • So her sage advice is "Get platform shoes and bulimia."
  • Just use some of daddy's millions to get a leg-lengthening operation.

    ...Hilton is an odd candidate for author: at a pre-Grammy party, she told trashy novel queen Jackie Collins, "I don't read, but when I do read, I read you."

  • She CAN'T read...She buys Jackie Collins audio books.
  • Asked her opinion of "Moby Dick," Paris replied, "I don't know, I've never slept with Moby."