"Body of Influence 2"
Body of Influence 2 (1996) is a very weak very soft soft core about the worlds dumbest analyst. Not only did he get involved with a patient and end up accused of her murder in the original, but he does it again this time. The patient is played by Jodie Fisher. The shrink still suffers from flashbacks to the previous dead girl, Kelly Howard. There are two scenes in a sex club where we see assorted body parts including full frontal from some of the guests, but our two stars limit the exposure to breasts and buns. The sex scenes are tepid at best.
IMDB readers have this at 3.8 of 10. Believe it or not, it cost over $1M to make. There is really nothing here worth even a rental fee. D-.
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
I have to admit that this campfire story fooled me.
Halle Berry plays a respected
psychiatrist who wakes up one day confined as a patient to the same
hospital where she had been a physician. In fact, being a
physican there is the last thing she remembers when she wakes up as
a patient. (She has no memory of the intervening three days and
Even in the most difficult of
circumstances, a physician would not be confined to the mental
institution where she had been on staff three days earlier. In
addition, automatic writing appears on
Halle's skin and on her prison walls, and she sees ghosts. Finally, Halle
is locked in a cell with no toilet. (
I didn't make that up. See the picture
at the scoopy.com page ). Therefore, given
the surrealism inherent in those circumstances, I assumed she must be either dreaming
or dead, in the tradition of Jacob's Ladder or The Sixth Sense.
I was wrong.
You can probably understand why I erred. The
authorities really did throw her into her own institution; she
really was locked in a cell with no toilet; and there really were
Essentially, the presence of real
ghosts explained all the unexplainable mysteries, including some
elements of her patients' cases which she had been unable to
understand back in her psychiatrist days. Indeed, Halle learned that
anything in the world which didn't previously make sense - anything
from the patients' paranoia, to the square root of minus one, to the
2000 balloting in Florida - can be attributed to ghosts.
Well, except for romance - you can blame that on the
It really made me re-think my life. I realize that I
have had the ghost-to-dance ratio all wrong in my blame
past, whenever things didn't work
out the way I planned, I used to blame pretty much everything on the Bossa Nova.
It started early on. My mom would say, "how did this room get so
messed up, Mr. Smarty-Pants Future Webmaster, and what are all those
scuff marks on the floor?", and I would respond, "Ma, the Bossa Nova
contest?? Duh!!". I got to a point in my mid-twenties where I
couldn't accept any responsibility for my own actions. I'd blame the
Bossa Nova for my substance abuse, for the dissolution of my first
marriage, even for the fact that my musical career wasn't doing as
well as that of Joćo Gilberto.
Oh, wait a minute. That last one
really was the fault of the Bossa Nova. But I was wrong about all
the other stuff - everything except the Gilberto thing.
What was I thinking of? How could I
have thought all my problems were caused by some silly, but
infectious, Latin rhythm? Now I realize that nearly all of those
things should have been blamed on ghosts. Logical enough. I can't
imagine why I couldn't figure it out before this. If only Gothika
had been made a few decades earlier. I would have been so much
Even if you accept the
omnipresent interference of ghosts as the explanation for all human
mysteries, ranging from the Dewey-Truman headline to the career of
Justin Timberlake, you may get irritated by the way Halle got out of
a corner that the script painted her into.
Halfway through the film, it seemed hopeless for Our Girl. Incarcerated, drugged, haunted by ghosts, accused of murder, advised
by her lawyer to plead insanity, and with all of the evidence
stacked high enough to convict her beyond any reasonable doubt,
Halle seemed doomed to spend the rest of her life in an institution.
You be the screenwriter. How could the script possibly get her
out of that?
Easy as pie:
First, Halle breaks free from the
institution by overpowering a guard in her cell, taking his keys,
and using the high-tech approach of "running away", a
master plan which goes off without a hitch, abetted by her
especially tricky move of hiding underwater in a swimming pool. A
clear, indoor swimming pool. No bubbles, no colored water, no jets of water,
Second, after her escape, with all of
the local law enforcement officers and the entire FBI looking for
her pretty ass, she makes the even more deceptive move of driving
to her own house. And nobody thinks to look there.
That escape process starts into motion a
final act which consists of the oldest crime movie cliché in the book,
the ol' "The police believe
I'm guilty and have closed the case, so I'll have to escape and
solve the crime myself" trick. Even with her heroics, Halle still would have had
trouble solving the crime, except that the ubiquitous ghosties helped her.
Ghosts, it seems, have their own agendas, and sometimes they will
assist humans in a crime scene investigation if it frees their souls, or
punishes their murderers, or perhaps just because they're bored with
the whole spooky noises thing. It is not
known whether the ghost detectives wear invisible fedoras and
chain-smoke Phantom Chesterfields.
Can you see why I was fooled, why I
thought that none of it was real, and that it must all have been a
dream of some kind?
I guess I'm being pretty mean, and
when you couple that nastiness with the feeble 17% good reviews, you might
conclude that the film is entirely
without merit. After all, 17% is down there with Boat Trip and
Gigli. You have to assume this movie sucks, right?
That assumption wouldn't be fair.
This is the kind of movie where you
want to praise the director (Matthew Kassovitz) and criticize his
film. I liked a lot of what he accomplished here. I liked the sets
he chose, and I admired the way he maintained the atmosphere with a
deft balance of lighting, music, dampness, rapid camera movement,
effective acting, and nimble editing. Very creepy stuff, lots of
"boo" moments. Even though the critics didn't care for it, the film
grossed $59 million and Yahoo voters were enthusiastic, scoring it a B
on the average, based on thousands of
So there's no denying that it had
some appeal and some strengths. Unfortunately, the second half of
the script cried out for the Monty Python "too silly" guy.
Kassovitz will undoubtedly make some
great genre films in the future. He almost pulled it off here, but
he just didn't have the stud hoss script he needed.
Halle Berry. Not much to see. (1,
Some loonies, full frontals and all. (1,
OutKast Wins "Album of the Year" Grammy
The current betting odds for Worst Picture. Gigli is the
favorite, of course, but From Justin to Kelly is still hanging
Current Worst Actress odds. J-Lo and Kelly Clarkson are
running about even.
Current Worst Actor odds. Affleck and Justin Guarini are
Current Best Director odds. Jackson is a runaway favorite.
The big news here is that Eastwood has dropped to fourth, behind
Weir. I'm kinda shocked that Meirelles is only 15 to 1. I
expected about 100 to 1. Who the hell would bet on him with only
15 to 1?
Current Best Picture odds. This has gotten to a point where
a winning $1.00 bet on ROTK will only return $1.15.
Current Best Actor odds. Penn 3/5, Murray 23/20.
Current Best Actress odds. Theron 1/5, Watts 5/2, Keaton
3/1. Theron and Watts gaining, Keaton losing ground.
- Here are four more free videos
Playboy's Big Breast Babes!
Kerry Easily Wins Maine Caucuses. Kucinich actually got 13% in
this one (more than Edwards)!
Grammys 2004 Tally. Updated in real time.
Timberwolf accepts Grammy with an apology. Pussy. Pop stars
are sure wusses now, aren't they? What do you think Keith Richards
would have said in the same situation? Jim Morrison? Frank Zappa?
- Cool quiz.
Are they quotes from George W. Bush or Emperor Palpatine from the
Star Wars Movies?
Study shows: No harm in extended Internet use. Unless you want
U.S. believes it has found Saddam's money: Woah - turns out it
was under his pillow all along. Whoda thunk it?" Representatives
for the tooth fairy responded that Saddam had left three billion
teeth under his pillow, and so received 300 million dollars at the
standard rate of ten cents a tooth.
- Do you feel that your life is
not quite complete? This could be the missing piece:
a new crime mystery/thriller written by the master of suspense
himself, Bill O'Reilly. Honest. No, really.
- This one is a real news story:
Nutty FCC Chairman Michael Powell considered a "tittygate" license
revocation hearing against CBS after last week's Super Bowl,
but aides calmed him down by offering to have Janet Jackson sent
to Gitmo instead.
- This one is a satire from
FCC Chairman Michael Powell Unveils Strict New Guidelines for
Defining Televised Indecency
Zellweger Says Audiences Want Top Roles for Women. Except that
men want to add the suffix "-less" to one of those words.
This is for you guys who are REALLY into
large breasts. I'm not kidding here. We're talking
monstrously huge and natural. (You'll notice I didn't mention the
A cool slide show of the final scene from
Robert Altman's Pret-a-porter.
Mouseketeer thinking of getting remarried. US Magazine says
she's still dating her ... um... ex-husband.
Bill Clinton wins his Grammy, Hillary loses hers. In case you
have forgotten, Clinton narrates a revisionist version of Peter
and the Wolf in which the Wolf is set free at the end.
Janet rejected a CBS offer, finally said "no" to additional
apologies, but Timberwolf caved. "Janet Jackson has decided
not to accept the CBS offer to appear on tonight's Grammy show.
The network said it would allow her to present a tribute to Luther
Vandross if Jackson apologized for her appearance on last Sunday's
Super Bowl half-time show." As I write this, the Grammys have
already begun, but I'm sure she still has time to change her mind
one more time before it ends. The article also says, "Justin
Timberlake however has decided to go for it. The NSync singer
will read some kind of apology to the nation so he can make a
cameo on the Grammy show."
Barbershop 2 and Miracle both open big. They grossed $25m, and
$20m, respectively, for the top two spots this weekend. Return of
the King passed the $350 million mark. ROTK will soon pass
Jurassic Park for the all-time #6 spot, but it needs $53 million
to crack the all-time Top 5, which doesn't seem to be in the cards
at this point. The three LOTR movies are currently rated #7, #8,
and #13 in all-time box office, and they are #4, #5, and #6 in the
all-time IMDb rankings.
FallonFey.com has already posted the complete weekend update tape
from last night's SNL! (Megan Mullally 2-7-04) The quote of
the day comes from Tina Fey, "It was a disappointing primary
season for Joe Lieberman, but on the plus sign, his campaign was
long, quiet, and depressing enough to qualify as a Jewish
- There's now a trailer online for
The Cookout, a new Queen Latifah comedy.
A Young Person's Guide to Chastity Belts. The title reminds me
of National Lampoon's famous list of Nancy Reagan's Dating Dos and
Don'ts. Yeah, those chastity belts are all the rage with kids
today. What girl's room doesn't include her stuffed animals, her
Justin poster, her Monet or Degas print, and of course her
Weekly World News: Land Sharks Exist. Great Whites hunt on shore.:
"Sharks with small, stumpy but powerful legs that allow them to
run as rapidly on land as crocodiles have been spotted by dozens
of eyewitnesses with impeccable reputations, in the Central
American nation of Costa Rica."
Laura Bush defends husband's interest in newspapers: "She also
disputed the president's statement that he gets news from his
aides and not from newspapers. The first lady says the two have
read papers together for years. She says what her husband meant
was that he doesn't read columnists he disagrees with or every
section of every paper." Yeah, he doesn't read the national news,
or the international news, or the local news, or the
entertainment, or the sports. He does enjoy the subtle interaction
between Nancy and Sluggo.
The sure way to get blacklisted by telemarketers - recite bad
poetry to them, and ask for their reactions in depth.
Torrie and Sable will do a pictorial together
in the upcoming Playboy.
European court backs ban on Red Bull energy drink. Because
European courts have no more important things to consider. They
hope to weigh on on V-8 and Tang soon. Hopefully before their
manned space launch.
FilmJerk.com looks at the first draft of Will Farrell's:
Complete transcript of Tim Russert's Meet the Press interview with
- Here we go again, as we
Jackson undecided about Grammys! And this was 10 hours before
they were scheduled to start. So she should have time to issue at
least five more press releases: two yesses, two nos, and an
undecided. Then the actual telecast will show her at the door to
the auditorium. She starts to go in, hesitates, steps backward.
Steps forward again ...
Can you tell the difference between a real smile and a fake smile?
Obviously I can't. I scored 11/20, and you should get that many
with blind guessing since there are only two choices for each
MovieJuice! reviews Miracle. "But what better moment for a
movie that takes us back to a time when the only revealed boob in
the Jackson family was Tito."
Peter Jackson honored by the Directors Guild. About 90% of the
time, the guild's Best Director also gets the Best Director Oscar.
archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
to submit a URL for inclusion in Other Crap
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
Words from Scoop.
.avi's from Shiloh.
.wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.
1. An interesting comparison. Here's young Nicole
Kidman, not in great physical shape, in Billy Bathgate. (.avi version, .wmv
version), and here's a more mature 30-something Kidman in perfect
trim in Eyes Wide Shut. (.avi version, .wmv
2. You may never see this again considering she's
now a gigastar and seems to have settled into flicks for young
girls. (It's a shame, because she has talent and energy to burn.)
Here's Reese Witherspoon giving up the goods in Twilight. (.avi version, .wmv
Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble
with the codecs for these movies:
FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use
DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use
virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the
vids says the video codec: DivX Decoder Filter & audio
codec: Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with.
When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG
Layer-3. A friend of mine told me about compressing the
audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been
capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this
info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp &
asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using
camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could
never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost
too much to buy in my opinion.
A reader says:
You mentioned that some users were
having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool
designed to determine what codec is needed for a video.
http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you
or your users.
I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9.
The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in
the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly
larger, and slightly lower quality.
First up from the Ghost...a few .wmv video clips.
- Charisma Carpenter in a bikini scene from the second season DVD set of "Angel".
- Stacy Dash, the "Clueless" star getting it on in scenes from "Illegal In Blue".
This is my favorite submission of the day! The absolutely gorgeous Stacy Haiduk topless in a shower scene and also in a love scene from the 1990 movie "Luther the Geek". I'm not sure why Haiduk never became a bigger star. She can act, has an amazing face and has almost Connelly-esque large, natural breasts! She was about 21 or 22 when this movie was made and well...all I can say is wow. It's not currently available on VHS or DVD, so kudos to the Ghost for this find.
- Stacy Haiduk
Assorted 'caps from the Ghost:
- Dawn Dunlap yopless in scenes from from "Heartbreaker, Streets of Fire."
- Mary Ann O'Donnell, also topless and showing off some pretty decent abs in more scenes from "Heartbreaker, Streets of Fire."
- An almost topless unknown from "Heartbreaker, Streets of Fire."
- Janet Gunn, the former "Silk Stalkings" star shows off her goodies in a love scene from "Night of the Running Man" (1994).
- Kathrin Lautner, showing all 3 B's in more scenes from "Night of the Running Man".
- Stacey Dash, best known for her roles in the movie and TV series "Clueless", here she is topless and gettin' it on in "Illegal In Blue".
'Caps and comments by Oz:
The nudity in Night Shift comes from some unidentified ladies, although the credits indicate they are probably all B-movie actresses. Shelley Long is very sexy when she is down to her underwear.
- Shelley Long
Plenty of nudity in Night Moves by a young Melanie Griffith (complete with bush and gyno-cam views!), Susan Clark and Jennifer Warren. Janet Ward shows cleavage.
- Melanie Griffith
- Susan Clark
- Jennifer Warren
- Janet Ward
"The Morning After"
Some good pokies by Jane Fonda in The Morning After and the briefest of nipple poking out as well.
"An Awfully Big Adventure"
Georgina Cates is the person in An Awfully Big Adventure and goes topless. An aging Carol Drinkwater is found completely naked.
"The Osiris Project"
Some mild pokies by Rebekah Carlton in The Osiris Project, a movie not in the IMDB.
Marnie Alton is down to her underwear in Replicant.
- Marnie Alton
I notice that there are some new naked ladies in Naked News that I don't think have appeared in the FH before. There's April Torres, Samantha Page and Ashley Jenning (who starts off wearing an Aussie bikini but I haven't heard of her down here. She's built like one of Hef's mates.)
||An excellent collage by DeadLamb of Carmen in scenes from "My Boss's Daughter". She's not nude, but her white shirt is so wet and see-thru that she might as well be.
||The UK pin-up model barely keeping her massive implants contained by a bikini top. Gman 'caps from an episode of "I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here!"
|UC99 'caps of two beautiful, and ultra-busty Italian babes going topless (Salerno also shows her bum) in scenes from "Le Foto di Gioia" aka "Delirium" (1987).
|Jennifer Love Hewitt
|A few more 'caps of her new, too-thin-with-smaller-boobs look from a recent appearance on Leno. Jen, if I may be so bold...your boobs are pretty much the only thing you have going for ya. I suggest you grab a few cheeseburgers and bulk up a little. Oh...and please stop trying to be a pop singer.