Sweeney! (1977) is based on a popular cop series in the UK called The Sweeny. I frankly had a lot of trouble following this film, partly due to the sometimes thick accents, and partly due to my lack of knowledge about British politics and the police system. It is vaguely about a pimp/personal manager blackmailing a cabinet member to sway his vote on an oil price issue, and about Detective Inspector John Albert 'Jack' Regan (John Thaw), who has a good idea what's up, and gets suspended and nearly killed for his efforts.

Diane Keen shows her right breast, and Lynda Bellingham shows both breasts while she is being murdered by overdose. IMDB readers have it at 6.2 of 10, but with very few votes. For me, it was a very long watch. D+

Movies, Theater, and TV:

The acting is terrific in Camilla, although the movie is kind of an artificial three-hanky chick-flick, and plays out like a TV movie of the week. As an example, Jessica Tandy finds the long-lost love of her life before the end of the film, and does so by accident. And at her age, long-lost is very long indeed. It's the story of the friendship between an eccentric elderly violinist and a young girl who aspires to write music. Tandy looks back upon her ancient clippings and draws upon her ancient memories as part of the process of imparting her wisdom to the young 'un, so it plays out sort of like Titanic Light. 

Jessica Tandy did a nude scene in "Camilla". She was 84 or 85 when she did the scene, and she had died by the time the film was released. 

 "Hey, that isn't beautiful or sexy, Scoop"

No, of course it isn't sexy, but beautiful is another matter.

She was one of the great stage actresses of the 20th century, a great and gutsy woman who continued to perform as long as she could stand, and continued to do so very well. She and her husband of 52 years, Hume Cronyn, appeared together in this movie, for the last of thousands of times they shared the spotlight, a time made more poignant by the fact that they knew her time was near.  During the film, Tandy and Cronyn speak this line aloud to each other (It's a quote from Sea Fever by John Masefield): 

"And quiet sleep and a sweet dream when the long trick's over".

If that isn't beautiful, then what is? 

• Jessica Tandy (all caps from Camilla by Señor Piel) (1, 2, 3)
• Bridget Fonda (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

I guess you all know what Monster's Ball is. The sex scene is quite different in the region 2 DVD. Graphic Response has made a massive and very interesting split screen divx file which he was kind enough to share with me. It shows both the Region 1 and Region 2 sex scenes in the same box, running simultaneously, so you can see exactly where the cuts are. Here are some of the highlights of the Region 2 version of the sex scene,  which is one minute longer

• Halle Berry (1, 2, 3, 4)

Normally, hit movies produce porn spin-offs. You know, the "Sperms of Endearment" Syndrome. But The Godson was produced a year BEFORE the Godfather. Do you think Coppola copied it? (Actually, there is a non-conspiratorial explanation. Puzo's best-selling 1969 novel was the inspiration for the title of both movies.)

Back in the pre-VCR days when there were still drive-ins and soft-core theatrical releases, producers like Harry Novak and Dave Friedman churned out film after film which delivered the goods to the target audience: clear photography, vivid colors, lots of naked women, and something as close to actual sex as possible without showing any penetrated orifices. This Novak film is at or near the top of the exploitation food chain. It has lots of naked women, including an exploitation queen, the mammoth-breasted Uschi Digard. Uschi comes as close to real sex as was possible in these films. She sits on a guy in female-dominant position, and her genitals are seen next to his testicles. Penetration is not seen, but it isn't possible to get any closer without actually showing it.

There's even a sorta interesting plot with some over-the-top Tarantinoesque violence - shocking stuff for 1971! Of course, the acting and special effects are awful, but let's face it, these performers weren't hired for their grasp of Iambic Pentamenter. (Uschi never speaks at all, even though people ask her questions. She just nods or shakes her head. I guess they wanted to hide her accent.)

The DVD is an outstanding value, as is typical of products from Something Weird Video:

1. The Godson has been lovingly remastered. It looks brand-new. The remaster is perfect.

2. It also includes full-length reminiscences with Harry Novak.

3. There is a second Novak film on the disk, Below the Belt, which also features Uschi Digard.

4. There are also two shorts on the disk, also featuring Uschi. I, Uschi is a masturbation video with genital close-ups.

5. There are galleries of arts, photos and songs from various Novak films.

I'll have some of the other material in upcoming days. Here's The Godson for now.

Thumbnails:

• Uschi Digard (1, 2)
• other named actresses (1, 2, 3)
• unknowns (1, 2, 3)

Individual Images:

• Uschi Digard (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16)
• Lois Mitchell (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
• Jane Allyson (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Orita deChadwick (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Marie Arnold (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Various Unknowns (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23)

Updates:

• Encyclopedia new volumes: Darian Caine, Tia Carrere, Belinda Carroll, Chiara Caselli, Patricia Charbonneau, Joan Chen, Juklie Cialini, Jennifer Ciesar, Sara Cosmi, Alison Eastwood, Audie England, Carmen Electra, Flower Edwards, Julie Ege, Nicole Eggert, Erika Eleniak

Other crap

• The golden jewel of the Plaster Caster collection
• al Qaeda claims responsibility for the Jimmy Kimmel show
• David Letterman's Top 10 Signs Saddam Hussein will go into exile in your neighborhood
• Sylvester Stallone's Avenging Angelo (also Anthony Quinn's last film)  will go straight to video.
• The Writers Guild of America has tapped "Antwone Fisher," "Bowling for Columbine," "Far From Heaven," "Gangs of New York" and "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" as nominees for its best original screenplay award. "About a Boy," "About Schmidt," "Adaptation," "Chicago" and "The Hours" will contend for best adapted screenplay. Bowling for Columbine was a major surprise.
• This is fucked-up. Divine Dildos
• that English pub that changed its name and logo to a hot naked chick them has to change back to the usual Boar's Head crap
• stand up for celebs

Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

• The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
• If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
• A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
• If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

Still at it with the sexploitation western from 1969 "The Ramrodder.

We pick it up from last time as Kathy Williams and Julia Blackburn are still tied together at the wrists and fighting with knives while bare chested. We see boobs rubbing together (boobs on the left are Kathy's), who gets the best of Julia but thankfully doesn't finish her off.

Then it's on to another unknown "Babe in Bondage" as an attractive blonde is kidnapped by the Indians and tied up in only her white panties.

• Kathy Williams and Julia Blackburn (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

• Unknown, blonde Babe in Bondage (1, 2, 3, 4)

• Carla Bruni topless B&W pose.

• Heather Stewart, two topless poses. #1 in B&W, #2 in color. (1, 2)

• Kate Moss, posing fully nude with her breasts in plain view, plus a hint of pubes.

• Kristen McMenamy, topless, with a cigarette.

• Lynne Koester, full frontal nudity.

• Selena, fully nude. Arms over boobs with a slight hint of nipple and pubes.