Hallam Foe


Hallam Foe is one of the best of the 1960s wave of British films which made a separate genre out of the tragic yet madcap antics of mentally ill young men. I can't remember exactly, but I think it came in between Billy Liar and Morgan. Wait a second. That chick from Mallrats is in it, and she hadn't even been  born in 1965. What the heck?

Oh, sorry. This excellent 1965 film was actually made in 2007. My bad. I missed a few years on my calendar. I was never any good at tearing those days off when they pass.

OK, I really knew it wasn't a 1965 film, but frankly, I'm still kinda depressed that Claire Forlani is playing the guy's beautiful but wicked, scheming stepmother. Claire Forlani is Joan Collins now? Wow. I really did miss a few years along the way.

Young Hallam took to living in a high treehouse when his mother died, murdered - or so he thinks - by his step-mother. One wall of the treehouse contains a giant photo enlargement of mom, fronted by candles, incense, and the other accoutrements of shrinehood. From his lofty arboreal vantage point Hallam engages in his two favorite activities: peeping on people with his binoculars, and swinging down from the tree half-naked while wearing a badger on his head.

Needless to say, relations between his father and stepmother are somewhat strained by the constant accusations that stepmom killed mom, and the strain is exacerbated to the breaking point when Hallam and stepmom have sex in the treehouse. His rich dad kicks Hallam out of their country estate. The boy migrates to London where he takes up life as a homeless person. Nothing motivates him until he sees a pretty woman who looks exactly like his dead mother. He stalks her and, when she turns out to be in the middle management of a hotel, cajoles a busboy job from her. Given the rather poor pay for 17-year-old busboys and the rather high costs of life in London, he makes a home by nesting inside the clock tower of the hotel, which also turns out to be ideal for his avocation as a Peeping Tom. Conveniently, the mom look-alike lives nearby, and Hallam can spy on her. Eventually he becomes more daring and climbs the roofs until he can actually watch his surrogate mom from her own skylight. He even watches her having sex. The married slimebag she's sleeping with finds out that Hallam is watching, so he gives her an extra vigorous and dominant rogering, then looks up at Hallam to show the lad that he's aware of him. Eventually Hallam will also end up in a sexual relationship with the look-alike mom, and that doesn't go too badly until she finds out (in a rather dramatic fashion) about the peeping. She's also not too thrilled with the fact that the lad thinks he's fucking his mom. Those elements put kind of a damper on the relationship, but Hallam needs to reconcile with her, and with his father.

If you liked those 1960s British dramedies about lovably quixotic loonies, you will find this to provide some excellent faux nostalgia. The kid from Billy Elliott, now pretty much grown (he's actually 21, but turns 18 in the film), does a good job at negotiating the fine line between a dangerously demented stalker and a troubled but ultimately good person. We neither like nor hate him, but somehow find ourselves engaged in his life anyway.


There is no nudity from Claire Forlani except for one frame of her bush (see the collage, third row down, far right). There is a brief bit of hurried and highly edited exposure from Ruth Milne. Sophia Myles shows her breasts in a pretty wild sex scene. Jamie Sives shows his arse in that sex scene.  That Billy Elliott kid (Jamie Bell) seems to show his own arse constantly, as the crazy are wont to do.

The film clips and the green-bordered collages have been done by other people. (There wasn't much sense in my duplicating the film clips from the same source, and there's no meaningful nudity from the other two women.)

Film clips

Sample captures

Sophia Myles

Claire Forlani

Ruth Milne


The Flock


This thriller represents the American directorial debut of a Hong Kong legend, Andrew Lau, who directed Infernal Affairs, the excellent film which inspired The Departed. It stars two fairly important actors, Richard Gere and Claire Danes. The budget was $35 million.

And it never got released in the USA, although it was filmed two years ago.

That should tell you something. Since you can assume it is not woefully inept, the proper inference is that the subject matter is so dark and the narrative style so aloof that no distributor felt it had commercial potential. It languishes in limbo, released neither theatrically nor on home video in North America, but seen in various countries across the world.

Richard Gere plays a crusty old caseworker for the Department of Public Safety, whose job is to monitor the progress of registered sex offenders. This job is his entire life. He tries to do it as well as can be done and considers all of his co-workers to be slackers. His obsession with every tiny detail of his assignment does not go down well with the sex offenders, who find his treatment of them to be invasive and illegal.  If only they knew! When he's not badgering them officially, he's donning a hood and attacking them at night! Even without knowing about the nocturnal attacks, Gere's boss finally decides that he's more trouble than he's worth and forces him into retirement. Claire Danes plays the newest recruit of the department. She will replace Gere in a month, and the two of them will spend the interim as partners, while getting her acquainted with the caseload. In the course of the training, Gere becomes aware of the abduction of a local school girl. He thinks that one or more of his offenders are responsible, and he becomes certain of it when they start taunting him anonymously.

Gere is not a police officer, but the real police have too many cases to handle to obsess on a single one, so Gere's monomaniacal pursuit becomes the missing girl's only hope. Danes realizes that Gere is not a normal person, but she is eventually swept up by his idealism, even while realizing that his methods are often misguided and even illegal. She resolves to help Gere find the kidnapped girl, despite her superior's adjurations to the contrary.

I mentioned that the film was dark. That applies to the cinematography as well as the themes. You'll get the picture most accurately if you think of SE7EN, although the monsters in this film have neither John Doe's imagination nor his library card. These are not your troubled, non-violent sex offenders like Kevin Bacon in The Woodsman. They are the kind who kill their victims after torturing and maiming them. They are simply dark and ugly, and they conduct many of their perverted activities in grungy warehouses, deserted trailer parks, abandoned farms, and other places which you would hope never to see except through the safety of a screen. It's more like SE7EN meets 8MM meets Hostel 2, although I, for one, was relieved that most of the nastiest activities took place off camera.

The direction is filled with all sorts of strange choices: speed-ups and saturation changes and pauses and jump cuts which make the film even more aloof than it would be to begin with. The characters portrayed by Danes and Gere and not really developed to any great extent, and what we know of Gere is not something we can really admire, so there are no moments of normalcy to break the mood. It's just an unrelieved journey into the minds of violent sex offenders, interrupted only by detours into the caseworker's mind, which is not much more pleasant to visit. Unlike many projects with a similar premise, like SE7EN or The X-Files, there is no witty or intelligent banter or lively debate between the partners or with the baddies.

I should make one thing clear. These themes could easily force a film to be a moral fable or a serious drama. This film has some elements of both, but is really designed to be ... er ... "enjoyed" ... as a thriller. It is not a bad movie, and Gere turns in yet another good performance which nobody will see, but it makes absolutely no attempt to connect to audiences, and it has nothing special to offer, so one can understand why the money men felt it unsuitable for distribution, even after having sunk $35 million into it.



It's surprising for a film with this subject matter, but there is very little nudity because the worst stuff happens off-camera. Cyd Schulte provides some brief exposure as a willing victim of S&M games who panics when things get out of control.

Film clip.



  • * Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

  • * White asterisk: expanded format.

  • * Blue asterisk: not mine.

  • No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.








Ghost Son


Ghost Son is a multinational co-production starring Laura Harring as a woman who loses her husband (John Hannah) in an auto accident then discovers she is pregnant. After the baby is born, she slowly realizes that the baby is possessed by her late husband, and is trying to kill her so they can be together again.

IMDb comments complain that it is not a good horror movie, and that they were expecting better from director Lamberto Bava. They didn't find it a good horror movie because it is not supposed to be one. The official site calls it a paranormal thriller. In other words, if judged within its genre, it would probably score in the mid fives at IMDb rather than its current score a point lower than that, which punishes it for the voters' misguided expectations. The production value is there and some scenes are effective. One in which Laura uses tweezers to pull glass shards out of her feet had me cringing. Still, there is not enough plot to consume the running time, and the supporting characters are seriously under-developed, so it can be summed up as a competent but unexceptional paranormal thriller.  

Laura Harring shows breasts and buns.









Adrift in Manhattan


One of my favorite babes, Heather Graham, is naked in Adrift in Manhattan. 

Tits and buns from Heather in these kind of dark caps and three clips.


Some boob slippage from Marlene Forte.







Notes and collages


part 12 of many

Jennifer Aniston

Episode 224

Episode 223









My next group comes from a disk called Rachel's Angels, which was said to be written and directed by Rachel Elizabeth. Written? Really? No one says a mofoing word. Bunch of gals, most of them silicone sisters, get rid of their clothes and wriggle around a whole lot. So WTF did she write? Words of encouragement? The address of the plastic surgeon who did her boob job? A post-it note on the fridge they all used during the taping? I am confused.

So why did I bother with this thing? It has a mess of Hefmates. Got Audra Lynn and Divini Rae and Ava Fabian...all of whom have done a film or two...and Heather Carolin. And then there is Sheila Levell and Jamie Hammer, who've also did some acting of a sort.  Elizabeth Kelly and Rachel Elizabeth fill out the list of strippers and wigglers. Audra was impressive, Divini was divine and the underused Heather was yummy. The others I could have taken or left. Rachel had a couple of explicit gynocam views. Everyone else was restrained in that department.

Ava Fabian's appearance was unwise. She must have been 45 when this thing was filmed. Once upon a time, 20 years ago, she was a spectacular beauty and there are times in this disk you can still see the wonders of her face. And she has kept in great shape. But, boys, she is old by anyone's definition and the skin and the bod just aren't what they used to be. I kept thinking of Chris Rock's comment about Janet Jackson's Super Bowl malfunction - a 20-yr-old tittie? That's everybody's tittie. A 40yr-old tittie? That's just your man's tittie. Ava should keep hers under wraps except for her man.

This is the fourth Peach DVD I have capped and maybe it's time to draw some general conclusions. From the perspective of someone who goes through a disk frame by frame I can see three things go into making a first-rate DVD - 1) Lots of great looking gals; 2) Competent filmmaking skills. You know, lighting and framing and all that sorta stuff you learn in a film course at your local junior college; 3) DVD rendering that compresses the whole thing so that motion chatter and all that sorta mess is missing. In that context, Peach gets the first part dead right and the last two dead wrong. In disk after disk and scene after scene, the lighting sucks and the cinematographic skills are nonexistent. Must of us did a better job filming Christmas morning. And then all of us who try it do a way better job making DVDs than these bozos. They screw up so often and results in such an egregious result that you gotta figure the people at Peach just don't give a flying fuck. Don't care about the product, don't care about the audience.

Too bad. Because their disks could be contenders. Instead, they are just bums. Face it, Charlie, they're just bums.


Today's featured performer: Ava Fabian

Film clips










In this 2006 docudrama, the producers use a fictional example to tell the story of what is happening to the women of Juarez, Mexico, and other towns along the Mexican border. It ain't a pretty picture, as 400 young women are known dead, and over 5000 are missing. Those figures are true, according to Amnesty International.

Lauren (Jennifer Lopez), a reporter, is sent from Chicago to Juarez to investigate the murders of unknown numbers of young Mexican factory workers working in modern sweatshops set up by huge international companies after NAFTA (the North American Free Trade Agreement) made it possible for them to build their products across the border, paying the workers 5 dollars a day, and then to ship them to the U.S. duty-free. Most of the factories work 24-hour shifts, but don't provide security for their workers after they leave, and neither do the Mexican police.

Lauren finds Eva (Maya Zapata), a young girl who was raped, horribly beaten, and left for dead, but who managed to dig herself out of the shallow grave she had been left in. But as Lauren tries to tell Eva's story, she finds herself up against the Mexican cops, the rich Mexican and American factory owners, and the Mexican and American politicians, all of whom don't want the truth to come out.

A pretty interesting drama, but what makes it more fascinating is the true statistics behind the fictional story.

Maya Zapata








IMDb summary:

"In Australia, the executive Kate (Linda Cropper) sees a young woman undressing her stolen dress in the swimming pool of a club, and regardless of the contrary opinion of her mate Phil (Jeff Truman), she decides to steal it back. Later her teenager son Matt (Wade Osborne) is approached by the smalltime thief Rachel (Anna Lise Phillips), the woman who stole the dress, and after spending some leisure time with her, they go to his middle class house. Sooner, Rachel's friend Nick (Scott Major) joins them, and Nick ties Matt to his mother's bed while Rachel masturbates him and cleans him with his mother's dress. The abused boy has a trauma, and his mother seeks revenge against Rachel, who returns with her friends, in escalating forms of retaliation until a tragic conclusion."

Anne-Lise Phillips







A trip back to 1969 in Hankster's time machine for a film clip of Hannah Schygulla in Das Kuckucksei im Gangsternest

Some classic nudity from Il Conformista: Dominque Sanda and Stefania Sandrelli

Alison Lohman donates her butt to a cause. The image is so small it looks like one of the Olsens.

Various clips and caps from The L Word, Season 5, Episode 5:  First, a film clip of Mia Kirshner (nothing much to see here, but it's Mia in girl-on-girl)

Then, film clips of Alicia Leigh Willis. Plenty to see here, as you can see in the samples below.