Virgin Territory


Virgin Territory is an attempt to create an Elizabethan-style comedy with modern dialogue, rock music, and a contemporary level of nudity. It tales place in Florence with the plague raging through the city, and the central character is a beautiful maiden whose father's death has left her in unfortunate financial straits. Before he passed away, she had expected to submit to an arranged marriage to a wealthy Russian count, but dad's untimely demise has left her family estate in the hands of an unscrupulous Italian aristocrat, and she will have to marry him if she wants to continue living on the grounds where she grew up. To make matters more complicated, she is actually secretly in love with a third suitor, a penniless rogue.

The plot includes the usual Elizabethan devices. There are several people pretending to be who and what they are not, including a puckish painter posing as a priest. There is a woman making love anonymously to a blindfolded lover who must later identify her by her kiss. There are plenty  of flashing swords, and about six romantic sub-plots. On top of all those conceits, there is also an encampment of horny gypsies who kidnap unsuspecting wayfarers, and a convent full of horny nuns who promise a paradise of poontang to any man who is suitably discreet and suitably randy. There is plenty of comic relief from both major and minor characters. There's also also lots of nudity: breasts everywhere, and copious buns from people of both sexes.

It all sounds kind of like fun, doesn't it?

It is, to some extent. It's not really a very good film because it's too unfocused and relies on too many plot gimmicks instead of dealing more honestly with real human passions. Furthermore, there is not a single surprise in any of those contrived plot devices, except for a couple of chance meetings where the surprise is generated by total implausibility. Everything goes down just as expected until the completely predictable happy ending in which all of the couples come together. The film also suffers from some weak performances from actors who were either miscast or insufficiently talented to handle this sort of period piece. Yet, in spite of all that, I found myself swept up by the story because it believes in itself. The director felt he was making a modern day classic, a dazzling Elizabethan costume comedy with a modern spirit, ala Shakespeare in Love, with just a touch of A Knight's Tale and The Princess Bride. While the film never rises to that level, its enthusiasm is infectious and you can have a good time just letting it wash over you. Despite all the nudity, it has a PG spirit and would make a very suitable date movie.

Chiara Gensini and Silvia Colloca (film clip here, samples right)
Kate Groombridge (film clip here, samples right)
Mamie McCoy (film clip here, sample right)
Unknown (film clip here, sample right)



  • * Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

  • * White asterisk: expanded format.

  • * Blue asterisk: not mine.

  • No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.








Good Luck Chuck


Chuck was at a birthday party in grammar school or junior high, and playing spin the bottle. He ends up in the closet with a Goth chick who demands to see his penis and wants to sleep with him. When he refuses, she tears out some of his hair and casts a spell on him. He will have no end of women, but only once each. They will then marry the next person they date. Cut to the future. His best friend has become a plastic surgeon who does boob jobs, and he is a dentist. He is unable to find love. The curse is working, and his friend pushes him to make the best of it. He has gained a reputation. Women are dying to sleep with him so they will then meet their true love. He enjoys this for a while, but falls for Jessica Alba, a penguin keeper, and tries to figure out how to break the curse before he loses her.

Alba was singled out for Razzies, which I think was a little unfair. The part didn't demand much, and I thought she delivered it. Critics were not kind to the film in general. Of course one of the main reasons for raunchy comedies is to show boobs, so I can imagine that the censored theatrical version was much less satisfying than this one. Good Luck Chuck: The Unrated Edition (2007) does what an unrated edition is supposed to do -- it dramatically ups the boob count. Chelan Simmons shows breasts and buns. Yasmine Vox, Vivian Dal Cengio, Victoria Bidewell, Susan McLellan, Simone Bally, Michelle Andrew, Kari-Ann Wood, and Carrie Fleming all show breasts in the film, and in the special features.

IMDb readers say 5.5.

Chelan Simmons 15

Yasmine Vox 19

Viviana del Cengio 14

Annie Wood


Victoria Bidewell 5

Susan McLellan 2

Simone Bailly 7

Michelle Andrew 7

Kari-Anne Wood 5

Carrie Fleming 11








The Last Run


Today we look at "The Last Run," starring Fred Savage. We knew him as sweet and innocent Kevin Arnold on the "Wonder Years." My, how times have changed! Our boy now has a lust for sex which cannot be satisfied.


Things start out slowly as we have no nudity from Andrea Bogart, but she is cute.

It's off to the races with some boobs as Amanda Swisten and our boy get it on. Caps and two clips.


Lisa Arturo plays a stripper showing off her "tiny tots". Caps and a clip.

Natasha Budhi licks boob.

Lisa and Natasha lap dancing "Kevin". Caps and a clip.

More breasts from Deborah Dutch.

Even more from Sheila Levell playing a hooker. Caps and 2 clips.








Notes and collages


part 9 of many

Lisa Kudrow

Episode 230








Mkone is back with Season 5, episode 4 of The L-Word. Collages to the right, film clips to the left.

Mkone also produced some new clips of Kathryn Erbe in Stir of Echoes (samples below)


Hugo is also back with his latest masterful collages

Emily Mortimer in Midsomer Murders
Eva Mendes in We Own the Night
Lena Headey in 300
Kelly Craig in 300
Rihanna in Hate That I Love You

A film clip of one of our perennial favorites, Ludivine Sagnier, in one of her best nude appearances in La Petite Lili

Finally, the sexy Eastern European model Malgosia Bela. This may be an old picture, but it's new to me.