Monday

Other Crap:

Wikipedia Entries Cleaned Up By Political Staffers
  • "Online 'encyclopedia' allows anyone to edit entries, and congressional staffers do just that to bosses' bios"

Screen Actors Guild announces winners

  • Actor: Philip Seymour Hoffman, 'Capote'
  • Actress: Reese Witherspoon, 'Walk the Line'
  • Supporting actor: Paul Giamatti, 'Cinderella Man'
  • Supporting actress: Rachel Weisz, 'The Constant Gardener

The scoop on Dreamgirls

  • "One of the biggest anticipated films this year is the upcoming diva story of The Supremes in DREAMGIRLS, which has an all-star cast with Jamie Foxx, Eddie Murphy, and Beyonce Knowles."

"First Look: In The Land of Women"

  • It's a new romantic comedy with Meg Ryan. This is the directorial debut of Jon Kasdan, Jake's brother. That would make him Lawrence's son, if you're scoring at home.
  • Speaking of the Kasdans, Jake (Zero Effect) will also have a movie coming out this year, and it will have some pretty big names in the cast.. Info here.

Top 11 Reasons the American Government is Spying on You

  • ... You get lots of e-mail from the widows and brothers of prominent corrupt Africans.

Videotape Proves Bush House-Trained Barney on U.S. Constitution

  • Oh, hell, you'd barely notice it. LBJ used to have them take it out every night so he could piss on it.

Ford Motor Co., in Cost-Saving Measure, to Cease Automobile Production

Here is a video of the original Nosferatu, the first great vampire movie. It is a legal download, in the public domain.

Italian PM Berlusconi, 69, says he won't have any more sex until his next election.

  • That's election, with an "l."
  • Or maybe he has a Japanese press secretary.

Academy Awards Best Picture Odds

  • Brokeback has become a prohibitive favorite at 1.25:1, having now left everyone else in the dust.

Ang Lee wins Director's Guild Award.

  • The DGA winner goes on to win the Best Director Oscar about 90% of the time, although one of the six who failed to convert a DGA trophy into Oscar gold was Lee himself, who won the DGA award for Crouching Tiger, but lost the Oscar to Soderbergh. That was the year Soderbergh had two of the five Oscar nominations in the category. (And the same two films - Traffic and Brockovich - were also nominated for Best Picture and Lost)

Incensed by more fibs, Oprah book club withdraws My Pet Goat

  • "Mr. Bush claimed that he had originally intended to call his 2003 State of the Union address a work of fiction, but at the suggestion of Vice President Dick Cheney he changed that designation to nonfiction in order to make the weapons claims more compelling."

2006 Sundance Film Festival Announces Awards

  • For the first time in the festival's history, the audiences and the jury agreed on both major awards (documentary and dramatic).
  • The winning dramatic film was QUINCEANERA, which they summarize as follows: "Disaffected Latino teenagers come of age in a gentrifying community in the Echo Park district of Los Angeles. Westmoreland and Glatzer have molded their mostly unknown ensemble into a tender portrait of a changing world and in doing so, have illuminated modern realities of family and hope."

Captain Nemo alert: "Video captures giant Pacific octopus attack on submarine"

TV anchor Bob Woodruff and his cameraman were seriously wounded in Iraq

Weekend Box Office Results, January 27-29, 2006

  • There are some suprises, but they are not so surprising if you follow this every week. Comedies almost always do better than predicted, sometimes much better. That seems to affect every type of comedy at every level of success.
  • Big Momma's House 2 was expected to lead the box office, but was not expected to come so close to $30 million. It exceeded expectations by nearly 50%. It did so well that it was very close to the all-time best January opening for a first-release film. It seems to be in second place, but could still end up in the top spot when the final numbers some in. The current Momma estimate is $28 million. The record, held by Blackhawk Down, is $28.6 million.
  • Nanny McPhee was supposed to be an also-ran, but ended up a powerful #2 with almost twice as much per screen as last week's champ Underworld: Evolution
  • The Matador had been off the experts' radar, but put up some great numbers in limited distribution and finished tenth.
  • In the non-comedy division, Brokeback Mountain added 450 more screens and held steady.
  • Underworld dropped nearly 60%
  • According to this report, Syriana was expanded to 1700 screens. That represented an addition of 1200 screens in its tenth week. Is this a misprint???? If it isnt a misprint, the guy who came up with this idea must wish it was. Although the movie had previously been a modest success, this maneuver seems to have tanked completely. It averaged $712 per screen - by far the lowest among the top 30. It grossed less per screen than Cheaper by the Dozen 2
  • Oddly enough, even though the films below performed far better than expectations (16%, thirteen million dollars), the weekend was still below last year (5%, five million dollars). If they had come in as predicted, the weekend would have been down about 20%. I don't know if that is indicative of poor predictions, extreme market volatility, or a combination of both.

 

 

 


Movie Reviews:

Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.

 

 

 

"The Dicktator"

The Dicktator (1974) is a sex farce based on the premise that the US president, obviously Richard Nixon, convinced the world to give all men sterilization pills to solve the over-population problem. What he neglected to mention was that the effect was permanent. After three years of no pregnancies anywhere in the world, they went on a search to find any man who had not taken the pill. They found a few candidates. A Peruvian shepherd who would rather have sex with sheep, a gay Jewish drag queen, a Soviet author in jail in Siberia, a Japanese drunk and dope addict and an African tribal chief. We see each of them on their first assignment.

The film opening has the Nixon character calling world leaders on the hot line. His secretary is madly taping everything, and all of the world leaders are having sex while on the phone to him.

Nudity includes Rene Bond, Elke Vann, Yolanda Beckham, Joanna Stevens, Mara Sonara and Marissa Laine as women serviced by the dictators, all of whom give three B performances. A host of unknowns also show body parts.

There are not enough votes at IMDb for a score, and no reviews. This was made by the same folks responsible for Deep Jaws, but is nowhere near as good in story, acting, or production value. It is a theme that has been explored before, and much better. This is barely a C- as a 70s sex farce.


Uschi Digard (as Elke Vann)



Joanna Stevens



Mara Sonara



Marissa Laine



Rene Bond



Unknowns



Yolanda Beckham




 



Today the old Time Machine travels back to 1991 for a couple more babes from "Scream Queen Hot Tub Party".

Roxanne Kernohan plays a "Damsel in Distress" as Jim Wynorski in a bad rubber mask fondles the Robo-Hooters.


Roxanne Kernohan


Then veteran "Scream Queen" Brinke Stevens takes a shower, and like the "Psycho" scene, she is menaced by a guy with a knife. But not to worry, he backs off.


Brinke Stevens




'Caps and comments by Dann:

National Lampoon's "Barely Legal"
If you are one of those that think movies released under the National Lampoon banner in the last few years have gone downhill, this 2003 comedy won't do anything to change your mind.

Three high school guys make extra money pirating porn videos from the place where one works after school. When he loses his job, they decide to make their own porn, and of course that leads to a series of disasters.

Although there are a few extremely funny bits in this film such as when they set the basement on fire, overall it's lacking. It's just not all that funny, extremely predictable, and lame in spots. Even worse, we once again have strippers that don't strip and porn stars that don't get naked. Sarah-Jane Potts plays a stripper, but in the strip scene, she's wearing patches. Later, she does some porn scenes but this time she's in a see-through, and you can see her nipples easily, so why the hell the patches in the strip scene? Then later she does a topless scene, but uses a body double. The double's figure doesn't really look like Sarah-Jane's, and the double didn't have Sarah-Jane's naval jewel. Either get naked or don't, for crying out loud.

There's some nudity in this movie, and even more in the extended scenes on DVD, but I really get pissed that filmmakers keep casting women who won't get naked in roles that require nudity. I don't blame the actress; I blame the numb-nuts that cast them. Another complaint: I like Amy Smart a lot as an actress, but at 27 years old (when this was filmed), she's simply getting too old to play a teenage girl. Get real, folks.

This movie is worth a quick look with the fast-forward button handy, and not much else.


Sarah-Jane Potts Tammy Morris Jacqueline Stewart Various



Here are a couple of adult babes


Kasha in action (hardcore)
Click here for her Internet Adult Film Database listing (stats, filmography, etc.)


Melanie Coste is some assorted poses and 'caps.
Click here for her IAFDb listing.



Here are Señor Skin 'caps of Danish babe Gry Bay baring all in scenes from "All About Anna" (2005).

Thanks to DeadLamb for these 'caps of "Matrix" star Carrie-Anne Moss really filling out her swimsuit in scenes from "The Chumscrubber" (2005).

DeadLamb takes one of the team and saves the rest of us from having to watch "Herbie: Fully Loaded". Thankfully for us, when Lindsay Lohan filmed this, it was before she went on the Olsen Twins diet.