Wednesday

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To see and use all the Funhouse features, you need Netscape 6.+ or MSIE 5.+.

• Netscape 6..2.1 is available free for download or on CD.
• MSIE 6.0 is available free.

Les Raisons de la Mort (1978), or The Grapes of Death is an atypical Jean Rollin film, that is more like a EuroTrash horror than a normal Rollin film. It still has castle-like buildings, naked women, and a slow pace with brilliant outdoor night lighting, but it is mostly a gore-fest. A girl sees her murdered friend on a train, and jumps off to avoid the zombie killer who is horribly disfigured, and finds herself in an entire region of such people. Turns out the damage was done from drinking wine treated with a bad pesticide. The film has her escaping one zombie after anothers.

Rollin cast Brigette Lahaie in her first non-porn role, and she shows full frontal. A couple of other unidentified actresses show breasts. As a lover of the classic Rollin style, I found this film a disappointment. The sets were not nearly as intriguing as usual, nor was the imagery as striking, and the makeup effects were third rate. The pace prevented any real suspense, and there were no startle scares. The DVD transfer was done from the original camera negative, but is still dark and noisy. There is an interview with Rollin, but I wish it had been in French with subtitles, as his accent was to thick to understand most of. This one if for Rollin completists only C-

MOVIES

The Curse of the Jade Scorpion (new to DVD today) is a Woody Allen movie. As with all of Woody's movies, no nudity.

I looked at James Dean one more time, this time on DVD, and I believe that Valentina Cervi did show a nipple in that sex scene.

• Cervi (1, 2)

I looked at Marquis De Sade: Intimate Tales of the Dark Prince (that would be a great title to use next time you play charades), a grade b quickie made in Eastern Europe, but not bad. Plenty of nudity, but mostly anonymous, and even the "star" (Charlotte Neilsen) is unknown to me. I'll tell you what, though. I hope she hasn't quit her day job to act full-time, because although she's very pretty with a magnificent head of hair, acting may not be in her future.

• Nielsen (1, 2, 3)
• Extras (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16)

Rat Race (new to DVD today) is basically a family movie. No nudity. Some fairly funny moments.

UPDATES

new volume for Lynn Whitfield

updated volume for Kate Winslet

The following are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

• The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
• If there is a white asterisk, it means that I inexplicably determined there might be something of interest.
• A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or somebody else besides me)
• If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

• Kristi Ducati

In the mix today are other Tuna-driven efforts, including Donna Barnes and Georgia Harrell in The First Turn-On. Silly-ass movie, but the pain of watching it fades and the nekkid babes remain.

• Georgia Harrell
• Donna Barnes

• Kathy Shower

Today's "Babe in Bondage" is Cheri Cafarro. Cheri was well known for her 70's trilogy of Ginger movies. This one is a lesser known one from 1972 named "A Place Called Today". In it Cheri is grabbed naked out of her shower, wrapped in a blanket, then appears in an outdoor scene raped and finally her character is murdered. Pretty strong stuff for a mainstream movie, and if done today would probably cause a real stir. Poor Cheri I don't think she ever made a movie where she didn't wind up naked and tied up. But is that really a bad thing?

• Cheri Cafarro, breast exposure everywhere, frontal nudity in links 2 and 3.
  (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15)

• Thumbnail Preview

• Carmen Electra just barely keeping her jumbo jacks from busting out all over. Very slight hint of areola.
• Heidi Klum, wearing only a body paint swimsuit.
• Victoria Silvstedt, subtle, see-thru, semi-nipple sightings.
• Erika Wall, single exposed breast. (1, 2)
• Michelle Ferrara, very see-thru top that lets us have a look at her large nipples.
• Stacy Dash, a companion image to the very hot pic we ran a week or so ago. This is a teaser pose.
• Shakara Ledard, topless. (1, 2)

*WARNING* This puppy is enormous! 638k! If you're on a modem, it will probably take less time to go to your local Video Shanty, rent it, watch it, and return it.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting a little action" means I don't need to take any fiber today.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... An "all nighter" means not getting up to pee.

Heather Graham's Screen Romps With Joseph Fiennes
Heather Graham refused to wear a "modesty pouch" while filming steamy sex scenes with Joseph Fiennes for a new movie. The protective pouches have become a staple in Hollywood to help actors avoid genital contact but the stunning star says she felt comfortable enough to be naked with the British star. She says, "Yeah, we had to be naked. But I felt really trusting of Joseph. We were both nervous and felt very vulnerable, but we liked and trusted the director and each other. You wouldn't want to do those scenes with an actor thinking he might take advantage of the situation." Killing Me Softly features a series of love scenes between the pair but Heather says there's nothing gratuitous going on. She says, "It's about the passion these two people have for each other, and how that passion becomes twisted."

Becky Lynn Gritzke is suing the makers of "Girls Gone Wild" video series for featuring her tits. Not only did she appear in the video, but is also featured in their television ads and their website.

I don't know which "Girls Gone Wild" DVD/VHS she's on, but it was filmed at the Mardi Gras last year.