Monday

Tuna
"Beast of the Yellow Night"

Beast of the Yellow Night (1971) is one of those ultra-low budget monster films shot in the Philippines with mostly local talent. John Ashely stars in the title role, as someone who sold his soul to the devil to escape starvation during WW II, and was given immortality but became the beast to do Satan's bidding. His wife is played by Mary Charlotte Wilcox of Days of our Lives fame, and this is a film they would probably both like to forget.

The plot was a little hard top follow, as there was a considerable amount of dialogue in Pilipino, with no subtitles, but Ashley turns into a hairy beast whenever he is sexually aroused, and when he wants to eat someone. Although he is invincible to bullets and knives, they manage to kill him at the end. Wilcox shows breasts in one sex scene shot with a red filter and constant cross fades.

IMDB readers have this at 3.1 of 10. Fred Olin Ray released this as one of his Drive-In films. It is, I suppose, a stellar example of some of the bad movies teenagers would put up with for a place to make out. This is a D- at best.

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  • Mary Wilcox (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    "Forbidden Fruit"

    Forbidden Fruit (2002) is a Canadian indie released at the Toronto film festival under the name Adam & Eve. The premise is an interesting one. It takes place in a college, and involves a coed, Nadia Mansouri (Eve), the young priest who teaches her choir (Adam), and her gay dance instructor (probably representing Satan). It is clear from the film opening, where we see the two making moon eyes at each other that there is something ready to ignite, and it does. He is, of course, guilt ridden, and she is madly in love. Her dance teacher has eyes for the priest, and tries to warn her off, and make time with the priest himself. In the end, true love conquers all.

    This was even too sappy for Mrs. Tuna. However, I found a couple of things to like about the film. First of all, Mansouri has the most incredible eyes (see the last image). Second, the sex between her and the priest was red hot and very convincing, even though it was not at all explicit. Mansouri shows breasts in two different scenes. She is an actress worth watching. Even though she does not have the anorexic body type of most modern starlets, she has great eyes, a very expressive face, and can dance. While this didn't even begin to realize the potential of the premise, a love triangle between a college student, a young priest, and a gay dance instructor, I don't regret watching it, which earns it a C-.

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  • Nadia Mansouri (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Le Mouton enragé (1974):

    I liked this black-hearted classic French comedy, and Tuna didn't, but that probably tells you more about us than about the film.

    Tuna's comments in white:

    Le Mouton enragé is a French black comedy starring Jean-Louis Trintignant, and featuring Jean-Pierre Cassel, Romy Schneider and Jane Birkin.

    Trintignant plays a bank teller who gets up enough nerve to pick up a girl (Birkin) who turns out to be a hooker. However, rather than pay her, he more or less forces himself on her. When he tells his friend, Cassel, who is crippled from an auto accident that also cost him his ability to have sex, Cassel comes up with a plan. He will turn Trintignant, who is clearly no longer timid, into a ladies man and deal-maker, and then write a best seller about it.

    The plan starts with taking Birkin to Maxim's for lunch every day until she is part of the furniture there, and then leaving her alone so she can meet an influential person. This contact is then parlayed into business deals, a job, and a great many more women, including Schneider, the wife of a friend of the author. Trintignant indeed becomes rich and powerful, including owning a newspaper and controlling politicians. The joke is that it is all so easy.

    Birkin was charming, as was Schneider, but I couldn't relate to the mercenary main character, and was very glad to see the 110 minutes end.

    Scoop's comments in yellow:

    I'm pleased to see that this film is finally available on Region 1 DVD with a few features. It isn't an outstanding DVD (no anamorphic enhancement) but it's better than having nothing at all.

    I find this film quite interesting, although it's not really very funny. I guess the Parisians have their own concept of humor, which is heavy on the cynicism and irony, and the atmosphere of this film is quite distinctively Parisian, from the sophisticated and amoral conversations, to the street scenes, to the music by Saint-Saëns

    Unlike Tuna, I enjoyed watching the way that the two cynical guys plotted Trintignant's rise through society. It was kind of a straight-faced Gallic approach to "What Makes Sammy Run?", with the additional spin that the author/puppetmaster who directs Trintignant's ascent has a hidden agenda of his own, which eventually ends up in a tragic dream-crushing revelation -  just because tragedy and crushed dreams seem to be de rigueur in French comedies. In fact, most of the major characters in this film ended up dead, many of them through murder or suicide.

    Those French are some funny, nutty guys.

    The cynicism of the film was nicely balanced by the completely charming performances of Romy Schneider and Jane Birkin, especially Birkin as a prostitute who is a truly innocent and good person. Birkin's completely genuine naiveté provided a very sweet counter-balance to the sleazy conniving of the other characters, similar to the role performed by the Georgette character on the classic Mary Tyler Moore Show. Trintignant was also guileless at the beginning of the film, so his first meeting with Birkin seemed to promise a sweet, frothy romantic comedy, which was not to be. Trintignant soon managed to compromise himself in every possible way, and even the wide-eyed Birkin was compromised by marrying a rich man she did not love. When Trintignant eventually gave up his greedy social climbing to marry Birkin, thus forfeiting her considerable inheritance for true love, they both managed to redeem their innocence, at least to a degree sufficient to end a comedy, and they finally returned to the callow relationship promised by their first meeting.

    Interestingly enough, one of Trintignant's great successes in the film was that he managed to turn a moribund newspaper into a top seller by essentially turning it into Weekly World News. (Remember, this is a French film and was made in 1974! Certain things transcend national cultures.). He and his editor had a great time creating sensational headlines to describe completely mundane events, then setting the headlines in the largest type possible and accompanying them with outrageous pictures.

    • Jane Birkin. (1, 2, 3, 4) She has three famous daughters - all with different fathers - actress Charlotte Gainsborough (father Serge), actress Lou Doillon (father Jacques), photographer Kate Barry (father John)

    • Christine Boisson. (1, 2) Her role here was an uncredited walk-by, stark naked, with no dialogue. She looked magnificent. In the same year, she became an international sensation by masturbating on camera in Emmanuelle.

    • Romy Schneider. (1, 2) First woman I ever saw naked on screen. Austria's #1 all-time star.

    • Some unidentified women. (1, 2, 3)

     

     

     

    Some .wmv clips. Today's theme - sitcom stars

    • Adrienne Barbeau became a familiar face as the daughter on the long-running sitcom, Maude, and became familiar breasts in Swamp Thing. Here she is, and here they are, in Open House.

    • Julia Duffy became famous as the preppy rich girl turned maid in Newhart.Here she is in the obscure Night Warning, which was released a year or two before she became Stephanie on Newhart.

    • Sheree North had two important but small roles in sitcom history. She was Kramer's mom on Seinfled, and she ratted out that his real name was Cosmo. She was also Lou Grant's too-sexy-for-Lou girlfriend on The Mary Tyler Moore Show. Here she whips out the jumbo jacks in 1971's Lawman, making Burt Lancaster even stiffer than usual.

     

     

     

    OTHER CRAP:

       

    Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the ones above, since it's sorta in real time.

    Click here to submit a URL for inclusion in Other Crap

     

     

    MOVIE REVIEWS:

    Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Shiloh

    Words and .wmv's from Scoop.

    .avi's from Shiloh

    Miscellaneous

    • As requested, Shiloh capped Peta Wilson in The Sadness of Sex. (.avi version, .wmv version)

    • Sirens revisited. Tara Fitzgerald. Full-frontal nudity, actually from the movie Sirens, one Hugh Grant movie you can enjoy. (.avi version, .wmv version)

    • Sirens revisited. Siren #2. Elle MacPherson, doing a lesbian scene with Kate Capshaw in A Girl Thing.(.avi version, .wmv version)

    • Sirens revisited. Siren #3. Speaking of lesbians, Portia DeRossi (real name Mandy Rogers) is the real McCoy. Here she is in Women in Film (.avi version, .wmv version).

     

    Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble with the codecs for these movies:

    Shiloh says:

    FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the vids says the video codec:  DivX Decoder Filter & audio codec:  Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with. When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG Layer-3.  A friend of mine told me about compressing the audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
     
    When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp & asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost too much to buy in my opinion.

    A reader says:

    You mentioned that some users were having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool designed to determine what codec is needed for a video. http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you or your users.

    Scoop says:

    I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9. The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly larger, and slightly lower quality.

    Oz
    'Caps and comments by Oz:

    "Carry on Abroad"
    As you'd expect, Barbara Windsor's breasts are visible in Carry on Abroad. Lots of sexy caps and near exposure by Carol Hawkins, Sally Geeson, Gail Grainger and June Whitfield.


    "Carry on Camping"
    It's the same again for Carry on Camping re Barbara Windsor. Gilly Grant is also topless and we have a few scenes from a naturist film.


    "The Unknown Cyclist"
    Lea Thompson shows some excellent see-through pokies in The Unknown Cyclist.

    • Lea Thompson (1, 2, 3, 4)


    "The Gambler"
    Some more excellent pokies by Lauren Hutton in The Gambler. There is some topless nudity by a prostitute who is probably in the credits but wasn't named in the movie.


    "Rush of Fear"
    Some minor pokies by one of the sexiest women in the movies, Rosanna Arquette.


    "Men Seeking Women"
    No nudity in Men Seeking Women, just lots of sexy caps of Starr Andreeff, Rebecca Walker, Holly Long, Pamela Gien and Rebecca Arthur.


    "Piñata - Survival Island"
    This film has so much potential, instead it was just another B-movie slash fest. It just needed some nudity and sex. The pokies come from Tressa di Figlia and there are just sexy caps of Jaime Pressly, Lara Boyd Rhodes, Daphnee Duplaix (Brainscan was right, why have playmates if they're going to keep their clothes on) and Julia Mendoza.

    Dann
    'Caps and comments by Dann:

    "Iris"
    This 2001 biopic tells the true story of novelist Iris Murdoch, her lifelong romance with her husband, and the trials of their later life once Iris gets Alzheimer's disease.

    The story is told through a series of flashbacks, with Kate Winslet playing the younger Iris. She did a great job, and of course, got naked in the process. Has Kate ever NOT gotten naked in a movie? My idea of a real actress. :-)

    An interesting but sad story with some definite insights into a very insidious disease.

    Flautista
    Dara Tomanovich
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

    Sally Kirkland
    (1, 2)

    From the movie "Amnesia" (1997). Tomanovich looks fantastic topless in a love scene. Depending on how many bad movies you watch, you may recognize her from "Bio-Dome". Sadly I think that is her biggest movie to date. Kirkland is also topless, and while I applaud older actresses who take risks and get nekkid, in this case...yikes! What you see is a 20 year old pair of robo-hooters on a well worn 53 year old body. To quote Indiana Jones, "it's not the years, it's the mileage".

    Cecilia Peck Brief breast views in scenes from "Torn Apart" (1990).

    Leticia Dolera The Spanish actress going topless at age 20 in scenes from her very first movie "Bellas durmientes" (2001)

    Variety
    Jessica Alba One of the most gorgeous women on the planet showing a little cleavage. Thanks to Squiddy.

    Gwyneth Paltrow Great 'caps by LC of the Oscar winner topless in scenes from the Sylvia Plath bio pic, "Sylvia" (2003).

    Scarlett Johansson
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)

    C2000 'caps the young star in her undies in scenes from the Golden Globe winning movie, "Lost In Translation".

    Kim Cattrall A nip slip from "Sex and the City". Thanks again to LC.

    Amy Smart I'm not sure of the numbers, but this topless scene from "Road Trip" has to be pretty high on the list of most frequently 'capped scenes. Regardless of the stats, I'm not complaining. Thanks to Plug.

    Julie Always
    (1, 2)

    Leslee Bremmer
    (1, 2, 3)

    Darcy DeMoss
    (1, 2)

    Teal Roberts
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Señor Skin takes a look at the 1984 gratuitous nudity classic "Hardbodies" (1984). Naturally, there are boobs everywhere.