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"The Idiots"

The Idiots (1998) is a film by Lars van Trier according to the Dogma 95 manifesto, which was an attempt by a group of directors to rescue film from the formulas, special effects, violence, trick lighting, etc that has replaced plot and character in modern film. Basically, they may use only hand held cameras, no artificial lighting, other than a singe white light mounted to the camera, no special filters, nothing but practical locations (no sets), and no props that are not found at the location. I argued that this was effective in his Breaking the Waves, as it helped set mood. In this case, it seemed much more like amateur film-making. Lighting was terrible, the shaky cam nearly made me seasick, and none of this contributed in a positive way to the plot or mood. The Idiots, AKA Idioterne is a story concerning a bunch of people who gather at a house and play retarded people, to "free their inner idiots." They are mostly rich and successful, can afford this odd pastime, and derive glee from fooling others with their "spaz acts."

Bodil Jørgensen runs into some of them accidentally in a restaurant, and ends up joining them. Each has defined their own version of idiocy, and practices it whenever they can. Things come to a head when the founder, Jens Albinus, challenges them to take their spaz act into their real life. Two women show everything more than once, Louise Mieritz and Trine Michelsen.

The film won many Danish awards, and is rated 7.0 of 10 at IMDB. Major critics are split at 50% positive. I found the ideas interesting, and think this could have been an excellent film, exploring the nature of madness, and coming to grips with ourselves, but found the Dogma 95 style too distracting to enjoy the film. C-.

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  • Louise Mieritz (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
  • Trine Michelsen (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)

    "Satan's Cheerleaders" (1977)

    Mixed is good in nuts, is bad in metaphors, and was not great in this film. Take your standard High School cheerleader titty flick genre, and combine it with a satanic cult genre, and voile. Of course, this is not the only reason for the 3.0 of 10 rating at IMDB. Standard plot elements for the cheerleader genre have sexy cheerleaders dating football players, a mean coach, a naive chaperone for the cheerleaders, and an evil janitor who spies on the girls through a peephole. All of these were present here, as well as the battle with the rival cheerleaders from another school. Unfortunately, they skipped most of the locker room and shower nudity with the exception of Kerry Sherman in her premier role. They deferred the virgin gets deflowered cliche to the satanic cult portion of the film.

    In case you are not up to date on your ancient occult symbols, a pentagram is a 5 pointed star, symbolizes man, and has a single point up. Thus the top point is the head, the side points the arms, and the bottom points the legs. An inverted (upside down) pentagram is a symbol for Satan, where the upper two points are horns. The "evil eye" is mainly an Islamic icon, and protects your possessions from others who give them the evil eye, or covet them. The film makers created a normal pentagram with an evil eye in the center for the logo of their satanic cult. In other words, a symbol meaning a man who protects your belongings.

    So, back to the plot ... the girls are on their way to a game when the car breaks down. The janitor picks them up, but it turns out he is a member of the satanic cult, takes them to an outdoor altar, and tries to rape one, but old Satan himself beats him to it. They escape, and run to the sheriff, B L. Bubb, who ends up being the cult head. The sheriffs wife, Yvonne De Carlo, notices that one of the girls has "the power," and gets into a battle of wills with her. John Carradine plays a drifter who lives in the town, which is, by the way, 100% cult.

    The most convincing performers in the entire cast were two Doberman Pinchers. The brief breast exposure from Sherman did not qualify this as a titty flick, and everything about the production was bad. I have to say F on this one.

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  • Kerry Sherman (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)


    Charlie's site is updated

    Honte's site is updated


    The Man Who Loved Women was a gratuitous 1983 American remake of a 1977 Truffaut film. For our purposes today, iyt was a pretty cool film, because it got Taxi's Marilu Henner nekkid! There is even pubic hair in view as she leaves the bed.

    • Henner (1, 2, 3)

    Satan's Cheerleaders is exactly as good as it sounds

    • Kerry Sherman (1, 2, 3)

    Boogie Nights won some Oscars, and made stars out of Marky Mark, Heathery Heather, and director PT Anderson. The coolest thing about it is that it stars every great character actor in the world except Frances McDormand. It must employ more famous character actors than any other film since Casablanca.

    • Heather Graham (1, 2)
    • Julianne Moore (1, 2)
    • unknowns (1, 2)
    • those immortal screen icons, Summer and Skye. They were not in Casablanca. In fact, they have larger breasts than all the actresses in Casablanca put together, although possibly not larger than Sydney Greenstreet's. (1, 2)


    The following are the latest movie reviews available at

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that I inexplicably determined there might be something of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.


    Today's Babe in Bondage is straight from a 1992 bondage flick starring Tasha Voux called "Bunny's Lesson in Pain". Tasha's tits take tons of torment as she's groped, bound and pinched with a few dozen clothes pins.

    Bjork The always odd Icelander topless in a music video. Kudos to her website though. The most information I've ever seen on any celebrity's official page. If you're a fan of hers, you can spend days going through it.

    Bulle Ogier The French actress topless in a love scene from 1983's "Tricheurs".

    Suzanne Somers An excellent topless scene from one of her very first movies, "Magnum Force" (1973).

    Shannon Tweed
    (1, 2)

    Shannon topless and showing a little more chunk than usual, in scenes from "Powerplay" (1999). Now I see why she went with the body double in "Dead Sexy".

    Blanca Marsillach The Spanish actress showing breasts and bush in "Flesh & Blood" (1985).

    Kerry Fox
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

    Breasts, bum, bush, and blow jobs from the movie "Intimacy" (2000).

    Charlotte Ayanna
    (1, 2, 3)

    Absolutely gorgeous collages of Charlotte's nudity from "Dancing at the Blue Iguana".

    Jamie-Lynn Sigler A sexy tribute collage of the young Soprano.

    Angelina Jolie
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Angelina Jolie and Elizabeth Mitchell
    (1, 2)

    Excellent 'caps by Snowblind from "Gia". Jolie goes topless and bares her bum, and Mitchell shows her breasts and partial bum in their lesbian love scenes.

    Bijou Phillips

    Rachel Miner

    Excellent, and large (about 370k each) collages by Dann of Bijou and Rachel showing it all in scenes from "Bully".

    Alex Kingston The "ER" star going topless in scenes from "Moll Flanders", by Watty.

    Pat Reeder The Comedy Wire
    >From New York Post, Page Six. The first time I glanced at this, I thought it said that J-Lo and Ben Affleck were starring in "Gigi." That would be quite a remake indeed...

    JENNIFER Lopez gets slammed in the supermarket tabs this week. Star's front-page story, "J. Lo Gay Sex Tape Scandal," is a rather dubious tale about a Pamela Anderson-style sex video featuring Lopez in a three-in-a-bed romp. There's no proof any such tape exists, and the only one who claims to have seen it is jailbird rap mogul Suge Knight, who resurrected the rumor during a chat with Howard Stern. The Globe runs photos of J. Lo's miniskirt riding up high enough to expose her pink panties. The shots were snapped as she got out of an SUV on the set of her upcoming "Gigli" with Ben Affleck.