Sunday

Tuna
"Fall"

Fall (1997) is a romance story between cab driver Eric Schaeffer and world famous super model Amanda de Cadenet. To make it even more unlikely, she is married. Nonetheless, he is able to ride his writing ability (he wrote a best seller, then gave up fame to become a cab driver) into her bed, and nearly into her heart. There were some interesting minor characters, and some interesting moments in the film, but it was basically the rise and fall of an affair. One of Schaeffer's friends is becoming an Episcopal priest, and has some unique outlooks on life, and a few good lines. One of the more interesting ideas involved the couple's first two meetings. In the first, he seduced her to orgasm by suggesting that she fuck him with a dildo. In the second, they actually do it.

Schaeffer showed the full Monty twice, while de Cadenet only showed her left breast briefly in an after sex scene. I liked both of the main characters, but tired of the story, especially the endless voiceover of his letters to her. I was also less than thrilled with the ending. IMDb readers have this at 5.0 of 10. This is a low C. It will probably satisfy romance fans, but nobody else.

  • Thumbnails

  • Amanda De Cadenet (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Pauly Shore is Dead (2003)

    Don't let the title get your hopes up. Pauly is very much alive, having spent some five years of his life writing and directing this semi-fictional account of the decline and fall from his inexplicable career peak. He weaves real events and an honest appraisal of his modest talent together with a fictional story about how he once faked his own death in order to gain a 16th minute of fame.

    He may not have been Woody Allen in the talent department, but it is obvious that Pauly made lots of friends in his brief period of fame, because some very big stars came in to do a line or two for this movie: Sean Penn, Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, Chris Rock, Bill Maher, Ben Stiller and Vince Vaughn all showed up to make fun of Pauly or his movies. They were joined by an eclectic group of lesser celebrities like Heidi Fleiss, Tom Sizemore, Charlie Sheen, Michael Madsen, Snoop Dogg, Andy Dick, Pam Anderson, Tommy Chong, Jerry Springer, Carson Daly, Tommy Lee, Carrot Top, Screech, Mini-me and many others, who comment on Pauly's real life or fictional death. Occasionally the stars rip on themselves or each other. Michael Madsen and Tom Sizemore admit that they don't know which of them is which, just like the rest of us. Cattro Top and Kato Kaelin rejoice that no matter how bad their lives seem, they are still better off than Pauly.

    In general, I thought this movie was a lot of fun. It is really a pleasure to kick back, turn off the ol' brain, and see the stars make fun of themselves and Pauly, and its amusing to think that that Pauly is one sucky celebrity who is completely aware that he sucks. I was sort of disappointed by the commentary, because it turns the whole thing around and makes one think that Pauly isn't really a guy who knows he sucks, but is rather a guy who is pretending to agree with the general assessment that he sucks in order to make this film. That isn't nearly as cool.

    Still and all, I got a kick out of the movie, which is pretty amazing considering that it was written and directed by Pauly Shore.

     

    Isadora (1968)

    This is a long biopic of the eccentric free spirit Isadora Duncan. (IMDb lists it as 131 minutes, but the VHS linked below is the one I watched, and it runs 153 minutes.) Duncan is considered to have the same relationship to modern dance that Picasso had to modern painting. She rejected the stuffy, highly conventional constraints of classical ballet and defined expressive dance in her own image. The film follows a structure somewhat similar to the well-known Chaplin biopic with Robert Downey, Jr, using a framing device in which an aging Isadora dictates her autobiography to her amanuensis, and this structure sets the stage for a series of flashbacks to the key incidents in her life. (Isadora Duncan's "Ma Vie" is a real book. See the Amazon links below)

    The film hits all the high points ...

    Duncan not only flouted traditional concepts in dance, but she flouted traditional concepts of morality as well.. One of her lovers was the theatre designer, Gordon Craig; another was Paris Singer, one of the many sons of Isaac Singer the sewing machine magnate, who gave her lavish gifts, including her own dancing school; she bore a child by each of them, and both children were tragically drowned in an accident on the Seine River in 1913.

    She spent a considerable time in Russia in the period just after the revolution. That country embraced her as a fellow revolutionary, and gave her an old palace to use as a dancing school. Although Isadora had sworn never to marry, she finally broke down in 1922 and wed a drunken, insane Russian poet named Sergei Yesenin, who was 17 years younger than she. Yesenin later accompanied her on tour but his frequent destructive rages, similar to the hotel room rampages of today's rock stars, caused them both much negative publicity. Of course, those incidents may have been more acceptable in the United States than their pro-Marxist politics. In Isadora's last U.S. tour in 1922-23, she managed to combined "immorality" and Communism in a stage performance in Boston, by waving a red scarf and baring her breast, proclaiming, "This red! So am I!" The following year, Yesenin left Duncan and returned to Moscow where he was institutionalized for mental illness, and eventually committed suicide as soon as he was released.

    Duncan's own life ended no less tragically than those of her children or her crazy poet. She always wore scarves which trailed behind her, and this caused her death in a freak accident in Nice, France. She was killed when her scarf caught in the wheel of her friend's Bugatti automobile. As the driver sped off, the long cloth wrapped around the vehicle's axle. Ms. Duncan was yanked violently from the car and dragged for several yards before the driver realized what had happened. She died almost instantly from a broken neck.

    The unconventional socialist actress Vanessa Redgrave was a good choice to play the unconventional socialist dancer, and she was rewarded for her performance with Oscar and Golden Globe nominations, as well as the Best Actress award at Cannes. Unfortunately, the director made all the usual biopic mistakes. The story is too long and rambling and pointless, and tries to pack her entire life into its running time instead of focusing on some important thread or some key portion of her life. We sit back and watch Isadora trot around the globe, apparently abandoning in succession each of the projects she had been extolling the virtues of.

    The film could have compensated for its unfocused script with some great musical numbers, but the dancing scenes are mostly repetitive. If you watch this film without knowing anything about Duncan's contribution to dance (which places you in the same boat with me), you will conclude that Duncan's entire schtick consisted of prancing about like a twelve year old dreaming of being a dancer, wearing flowing gowns, trailing a diaphanous scarf, bending her knees, pointing her toes, waving her arms, and acting "free". I'm sure that must have been some of what Duncan did, but surely not the whole shebang! I guess I could have handled watching this once, but the process of prancing around the room must have occupied close to an hour of the film's running time, and it looked exactly the same every time. (One of her lovers actually said "will you stop prancing around the goddamned room" just as I was thinking the same thing!) I did, however, enjoy the prancing a lot more on the one occasion when she did it naked.

    Although the film doesn't cohere very well, there are some great individual scenes. I liked some of the Russian material quite a bit. The one dance scene that is significantly different from the others is Duncan's first performance in Russia. The lights go out while she performs, and the night seems doomed to be a failure, but everyone there improvises, and they end up having the most memorable night of their lives. Someone in the Russian audience provides a lantern, then the audience members gradually start to sing to provide musical accompaniment. One man manages to produce a squeezebox. Several men join Duncan on stage for traditional Russian dancing, and the film managed to capture the whirlwind of the moment. This scene got me. I was clapping along, completely drawn in.

    Unfortunately, it takes the film nearly two hours to get to that point, and that wait could be excruciatingly boring, and I got the impression that Ms Duncan was both pretentious and mentally ill. If the rest of the film had been as invigorating as the Russian part, I might have enjoyed spending 153 minutes with the characters and their repetitive eccentricities, but it wasn't and I didn't.

    • Vanessa Redgrave (1, 2, 3)

     

    Other Crap:

    Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the links above, since it's sorta in real time.

    Click here to submit a URL for Other Crap

     

     

    MOVIE REVIEWS:

    Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

     

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Jr's Polls
    It was pretty clear who will be taking the victory lap for Best Nude Debut, the 80's. So I went ahead and closed the polling.

    Here are the final results.

    Look for our poll wrap up comments in the days ahead.

    In the mean time, let's move to the 90's!

    For our next poll we're looking for the best film as well as screen nudity debut (both in the same film) by an actress between 1990-1999. The voting will begin on Monday. But for now, here is our first batch of nominees.

    This fist half features the purest of the first film and first nudity nominees...

    • Emily Watson in "Breaking the Waves" (1996)
    • Natasha Henstridge in "Species" (1995)
    • ChloŽ Sevigny in "Kids" (1995)
    • Catherine McCormack in "Loaded" (1994)
    • Catherine Zeta-Jones in "1001 Nights" (1990)
    • Portia DeRossi in "Sirens" (1994)
    • Kate Fischer in "Sirens" (1994)
    • Claire Forlani in "Gypsy Eyes" (1992)

    This second half features actress who may have been TV stars or had one or two small uncredited roles before their real acting debut.

    • Melissa George in "Dark City" (1998)
    • Elle Macpherson in "Sirens" (1994_
    • Charlize Theron in "2 Days in the Valley" (1996)
    • Julia Ormond in "The Baby of M‚con" (1993)
    • Angelina Jolie in "Cyborg 2" (1993)

    Email Scoopy Jr. with your nominees, comments or suggestions.

    Spaz
    'Caps and comments by Spaz:

    "Intern Academy" (2004)
    Canadian hospital comedy starring SNL's Dan Aykroyd and SCTV's Dave Thomas. Released to video last week with basic extras.

    Oz
    'Caps and comments by Oz:

    Wednesday is Australia Day, which celebrates the day the English first landed a fleet of convicts in Sydney in 1788. I guess it's similar to America's thanksgiving but without all the rigmarole. To celebrate, this weekend's contribution is an all-Aussie contribution.


    "Alvin Purple"
    Alvin Purple was a randy bloke who women found irresistible. He takes up employment as a window cleaner, water bed salesman and a sex therapist. This provides plenty of reasons for naked ladies. There's a lot of nudity shown by Abigail, Lynette Curran, Anne Pendlebury, Jenny Hagen, Jacki Weaver, Christina Amor, Shara Berriman, Kris McQuade, Debbie Nankervis, Elke Neidhardt, Ellie Maclure and an unknown tram passenger.


    "Alvin Rides Again"
    This is the sequel to Alvin Purple and is in the same vein. Nakedness shown by Judy Stevenson, Candy Raymond, Abigail, Briony Behets, Chantal Contouri, Joy Thompson and Kris McQuade.


    "Alvin Purple (TV series)"
    There was also an Alvin Purple TV series with more naked women. From the episode Like Son, Like Father we have an unidentified lady starkers and Carol Lane shows her underwear. Briony Behets shows a lot of cleavage in an episode called The Hustled.


    "Hotel De Love"
    Raelee Hill is topless in Hotel De Love and Saffron Burrows almost is, she is wearing nipple patches. Pippa Grandison is topless by facing the wrong way.


    "Horseplay"
    Horseplay is a mediocre comedy. There's no nudity just lots of cleavage and underwear by lots of actresses including Amanda Douge, Abbie Cornish, Christina Collard, Krista Vendy, Elizabeth Sandy, Natalie Mendoza, Tushka Bergen and Alyssa McClelland.

    Variety
    Jessica Simpson
    (1, 2)

    Another behind the scenes look at the pop star on the set of the new "Dukes of Hazzard" movie. Simpson of course plays Daisy Duke. In #1 she looks great in a purple bikini. In #2 we see that her bikini doesn't quite cover all of bum.

    Kyra Sedgwick
    (1, 2, 3)

    Señor Skin 'caps of Mrs. Kevin Bacon topless in the tub in scenes from the small budget movie "Cavedweller" (2004).