The following is a pre-approved posting whose purpose is to offer insight and advice to people living in the Northern USA, and moving South.

Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed on how to use it shortly. Just because you can drive on snow and ice does not mean Southerners can. Stay home the two days of the year it snows. If you do run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in the cab of a four-wheel drive pick-up with a 12-pack of beer and a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them. Just stay out of their way. This is what they live for. You can ask Southerners for directions, but unless you already know the positions of key hills, trees and rocks, you're better off trying to find it yourself. Remember: "Y'all" is singular. "All y'all" is plural. "All y'all's" is plural possessive. Get used to hearing, "You ain't from around here, air' ya?" Don't be worried that you don't understand anyone. They don't understand you, either. Or each other. The first Southern expression to creep into a transplanted Northerner's vocabulary is the adjective "big ol", as in "big ol truck", or "big ol boy". (In the last few years, it has become "big ass"--big ass truck, big ass tires, big ass woman, for instance.)** "Fixin'", as in "I'm fixin' to go to the store", is 2nd. And "Y'all" is 3rd. As you are cursing the person driving 15 mph in a 55 mph zone directly in the middle of the road, remember: ALL Southern folks learned to drive on a John Deere, and this is the proper speed and lane position for that vehicle. If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, y'all, watch this!" stay out of his way. These are likely the last words he will ever say, or worse still, that you will ever hear. Most Southerners do not use turn signals; they ignore those who do. In fact, if you see a signal blinking on a car with a Southern license plate, you may rest assured that it was already turned on when the car was purchased. If it can't be fried in bacon grease, it ain't worth cooking, let alone eating. If there is the prediction of the slightest chance of even the most minuscule accumulation of snow, your presence is required at the local grocery store. It does not matter if you need anything from the store. It is just something you're supposed to do. Satellite dishes are very popular in the South. When you purchase one, it is positioned directly in front of the house. This is logical; bearing in mind that the dish cost considerably more than the house and should, therefore, be prominently displayed. Be advised that in the South, "He needed killin'" is a valid defense.


One Fish, Two Fish
Tuna's two-day project is "Fast Times at Ridgemont High". Today's portion is Jennifer Jason Leigh.

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Lida Egorova is on Blinky's runway today for the first of three days.

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Mr. Pal doesn't send them in unless they are either new to him or he thinks he can improve on the ones he's seen. He ususlly delivers the goods, too. My kinda guy. He has four good ones this week.

A woman who slept with President Clinton and admitted she liked it! She's also has a full career, from Miss Arkansas to the Miss America Pageant, a couple of Playboy spreads, many movies ..... Elizabeth Gracen in "Discretion Assured" Emmanuelle Beart in "L'amour en douce" Melissa Moore in "Compelling Evidence" Sophie Barjac in "L'amour en douce"

Yesterday was Lisa, 18, from Manchester. (#1 #2 #3 #4)

Request girl is Andrea Kovic (#1, #2)

Miscellaneous bikini shots in the paper Nell McAndrew (#1, #2, #3) Claire Goose

+ Ever wonder what the Playboy, Page Three, and other softcore models do when not modeling for Playboy or the British tabs? Fred does. Fred, or as he is known in the ancient Elventongue, "Frodo", specializes in "outing" the harder action from these ostensibly wholesome girls. Today's feature:

"Page 3 Girl Natasha Lester has also been in Playboy and Penthouse as well as nearly every other men's magazine. She has also done a Private Performance (PPV-008) video, but her video is conservative by PP standards. Natasha even uses her own name for her video

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PIO Y'know, PIO does absolutely excellent work. He does some of the best paparazzi shots ever. I never know who they are, but if you're from Spain, I'll bet you're gonna go nuts over these beautiful frontal nudes of Arienne Brown.

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El Kabong is back with more pornbabes
  • Barbara Dare (#1, #2)
  • Brittany O'Connell and Raveness (#1, #2, #3, #4, #5)
  • Shayla Laveaux (#1, #2, #3, #4)

  • FR Something a little different from FR today. Some porn and some g-rated stuff!

    Joaly in "Stavros" Steps - "Party in the Park". Hint: this may sound like the porn, but it isn't

    ReCaps Haven't heard from Recap in a while. He has some rasslin' babes. Stephanie McMahon showing nothing, and Miss Kitty pretty much showing her entire butt.

    McMahon Kitty

    Kuni Since Mongoose or somebody brought up Kaori Mizutani, here's some more ...... .

    (#1, #2, #3, #4)

    Snappy Pappy Mariah in the new Rolling Stone. She looks really good in picture #2

    (#1, #2, #3)

    HTE Women tennis stars (no nudity).

    Serena - lots of cleavage Jelena Dokic Monique Viele

    SC Victoria Taft in "Sizzle Beach USA"

    Members Bonuses- Jaded

    a Jaded

    "Jaded" was just released on DVD. Now this may not seem like such a big event in the history of motion pictures, but it's a pretty big deal in the history of celebrity nudity, because the blinkin' thing is just chock filled with Carla Gugino nude scenes. No need to talk about the movie. It's a cheapazoid exploitation pic with no special redeeming qualities. Without Carla Gugino, attracting no attention. But Carla is in it and here she is. (I'll have the other women tomorrow. Just Gugino today. )

    Giant rear nude on the beach Rear and side nudes on the beach Lying in bed with half of her rear exposed topless in the shower completely naked in the shower the rape (these three are dark nighttime scenes, Gugino on bottom) the rape the rape the three girls skinny-dipping (Gugino on the right)

    Members Bonus

    ... and
  • NipLips presents Lori Bagley (Veronica's Closet) in "Kingpin". No nudity, but really sexy.
  • and Serena with some serious chest action
  • Cindy Pielstroom paparazzi
  • Three vidcap collages from Demon. Miranda Richardson, "Dance With A Stranger"
  • Diane Keen in "Sweeney"
  • Maggie O'Neill in "Killing me Softly"
  • I told ya somebody woul dget Cindy Crawford in the new Elle. Here's three from the masterful Czechmate.
  • Cindy
  • Cindy
  • Two from Don Juan. Debra Winger in "Slumber Party '57"
  • Debra Winger in "Slumber Party '57"
  • Four rare ones from HBS. Senta Berger in "Die Herrenreiterin"
  • Berger
  • Berger
  • Berger
  • Five from "After Hours" - Michelle Phillips in "Valentino"
  • Michelle Phillips in "Valentino"
  • Michelle Phillips in "Valentino"
  • Michelle Phillips in "Valentino"
  • and Carrie Anne Moss from "Softkill"
  • Two from Celeblover Ann-Cathrin Sudhoff in "Tatort"
  • .. and Ursula Schmitz in "Der reizende Reigen"
  • two from Graphic Response: Amy Brenneman in "Your Friends and Neighbors"
  • ... and Joey Heatherton in "Bluebeard"
  • Rebecca DeMornay in "Wicked Ways"
  • Erica Johanson loses her boob on live TV - from Swedeocaps
  • paparazzi shot of Alessia Merz
  • Click Here!