Everybody's All-American (1988) is one of those films I did early in my career from VHS. It is finally available on DVD. The film is in the 6.2 of 10, 2 to 2.5 star range, and I wasn't all that impressed the first time I saw it. I was not clear as to what the problem was.
It is the story of The Grey Ghost, star football player from a southern school, Dennis Quaid, his fiance and Magnolia Queen Jessica Lang, and Quaid's cousin, studious Timothy Hutton. THe Grey Ghost was the real thing, everybody's all-American, school legend, and genuinely nice person. Lang was the epitomy of the southern bell beauty queen. Quaid agreed to look after his cousin Hutton, who was attending the same school, and the three of them became fast friends. From here on is where the story got in trouble. One view is that it is the story of a football players life, beginning with his glory days, through first round draft pick by the worst team in the league, through his decline, and then learning to cope with being once famous. Then their is the love triangle among the three. As if this weren't enough confusion, they through in a civil rights and race angle with a black former football player, and had an entire sub-plot about Lang losing her southern bell, "why little old me?" and becoming a shrewd and successful business woman.
So, was this a sports story, a romantic love triangle, or the story of the growth of a woman? I think the answer comes with the sappy romantic ending. It was a chick flick relationship story all along. All three characters were likable, sympathetic characters, and they were played extremely well by the leads, but the problem is very basic. What made them think that a football story would appeal to the chickflick audience, and vice versa?
There is good news o the nudity front with the DVD release. Lang shows nipples through her wedding night negligee, and does a back lit night nude scene that I was unable to pull out of the darkness working with the VHS. The images from that full frontal and rear nude scene are not good, but you can now tell that she was in fact naked. The deleted scenes also provided a pleasant surprise with breast exposure from Savannah Smith Boucher. This is a C-. Either the football story or the love triangle would have worked well, even if a little bit formulaic, but combining the two ending up bothering everyone.
Savannah Smith Boucher
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
Movies from Shiloh:
The L Word
Sex scene between Karina Lombard and Mia Kirshner (.avi
version, .wmv version)
Sex scene between Kirshner and some guy (.avi
version, .wmv version)
Sex scene between Laurel Holloman and Jennifer Beals.
(.wmv version only). Perhaps we'll have an .avi later. Shiloh, if
you are reading, can you perhaps make a smaller vid of just the
nudity in this scene?
Lesbian swimming pool skinny dipping scene. If you
know who it is, let me know. (.wmv version)
Laurel Holloman and somebody else - if you know who
it is, tell me. (.avi version, .wmv version)
Vidcaps from Shiloh's videos:
Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble
with the codecs:
FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use
DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use
virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the
vids says the video codec: DivX Decoder Filter & audio
codec: Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with.
When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG
Layer-3. A friend of mine told me about compressing the
audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been
capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this
info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp &
asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using
camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could
never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost
too much to buy in my opinion.
A reader says:
You mentioned that some users were
having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool
designed to determine what codec is needed for a video.
http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you
or your users.
I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9.
The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in
the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly
larger, and slightly lower quality.
Note: yesterday's clips from Basic Instinct were not
from Shiloh. My labeling error - I put them in his section without
ONE MORE SMALL VID, not from
Jennifer Lopez - her nipple falls out in public. No
sound. (.avi version, .wmv version, .jpg capture)
The Other Crap link to "Mariah Topless ... Well,
Sorta" is to a picture that is taken from Mariah Carey's 2004
calendar, so it's probably = not = from when she was gadding about
topless the other day.
Thank you. I thought that
looked posed, not candid.
- Quote of the day. Quick - who said these words?
"Am I the evil genius in the corner that nobody ever sees come
out of his hole? It's a nice way to operate, actually."
- Quote of the day #2:
Who called her son "a vagina-friendly young man"?
The trickiest pussy ever.
(Very naughty video)
Yahoo's full slideshow (327 pics) of photos from the Sundance
- According to the
official Oasis website: "Alan White has been asked
to leave Oasis by the other band members. There are no plans
to replace Alan. The band's scheduled recording sessions
remain unaffected. "
National Book Critics Circle chooses awards nominees.
Dirkon - The Paper Camera
Redford: The time's right to act again: "This is
his way of announcing that his tenure as founder and frontman
of the Sundance Film Festival is nearing an end. And he's
about to recommit to his day job: acting and directing."
- VIRUS ALERT:
Bagle virus hides as calculator, uses a simple Hi! in the
Shelter Puts 13 Abandoned Ferrets Up For Adoption at $74 each.
Anonymous money order arrives - $962 - Hollywood bank.
Mysterious movie star purchaser still unidentified.
American singer Pink as she appears in a new advertisement for
A MONOPOLY-style board game which mocks America's crime-ridden
black ghettos has been branded sick and racist in the U.K.
Kobe will have to pay for his own Big Macs in the future.
Russian chick has X-ray vision. No, really. “I see
everything that happens inside the human body, including in
Police Probe 'Assault' on Scientist Stephen Hawking.
Hey, c'mon. I had to work him over a bit. He was parked in one
of "our" spots.
Art Denude's free galleries
- A long, long article dedicated to that all-time stinkfest
"MANOS" THE HANDS OF FATE
Nude beach, chicks with tattoos. What
else is there?
Canada's new $5 coin features Bill Shatner. My kind
of country! (Ok, I confess. It's a Canadian humor site.) Mr.
Tambourine Man. MR. TAMBOURINE MAN!!!!
Rating the screen lesbians.
Friends are a good thing, so where are Martha Stewart's?
In sharp contrast to, say, Michael Jackson, there has been no
outpouring of public support for Stewart from the people who
have partied with her.
Kerry surprise winner in Iowa; Gephardt exit expected.
Kerry's response. "Fuckin' A. Nobody else expected Dean to
fuck up so bad. Piss you off when I'm right, mofos?" Kerry 38%
of the delegates, Edwards 32, Dean 18, Gephardt 11 and out of
Ain't It Cool News - presents a review of the first reel of
Comprehensive info page for the new Superman movie
... looking at Selma Blair for Lois Lane.
Punk Rocker Rotten on Reality TV Show: " British
television company announced Monday that the former Sex
Pistols singer and angry punk icon - now known by his real
name, John Lydon - has agreed to appear in the reality show
'I'm a Celebrity ... Get Me Out of Here!' "
FilmJerk.com - The Early Report for January 19, 2004
Note one error: Beyond the Sea is not Kevin Spacey's first
film as a director, although he'd like to forget Albino
Alligator, and the rest of us already have. It is, however,
the first time he has directed himself.
Burton's "Big Fish" Nets BAFTA Boost: "The
Hollywood director's fantastical Big Fish made its strongest
awards-show showing yet, catching seven nominations Monday for
the Orange British Academy Film Awards, aka the BAFTAs. "
(Cold Mountain 13, Lord of the Rings 12) The British have
always been better than the Americans at recognizing comedy
and fantasy movies (Ground Hog Day won best original
screenplay at the BAFTAs). The British group also properly
nominated Johnny Depp as best actor in Pirates of the
Caribbean, a turn which was clearly the most memorable
performance of the year, but has been passed over by many
"serious" award groups. Strangely, they nominated Scarlett
Johansson TWICE for best actress, snubbing Charlize Theron
How to be a Drunken Asshole
Cat-Dropping Coffee Fetches Big Bucks: One of the
world's most expensive coffees is supposedly made from
droppings of weasellike civet cats. And it's reputed to be an
aphrodisiac. Penelope Cruz commented "Makes sense. Small
weasel-like creatures always make me horny".
A tax office official in Finland who died at his desk went
unnoticed by up to 30 colleagues for two days.
Bette Midler may withdraw her Grammy nomination.
She's up against the B-Sharps in "Best Barbershop or Bath
House", and she's a big Simpson's fan.
The Queen has outwitted a group of children with her knowledge
of Harry Potter, but the kids were far more
impressed when Hugh Grant quizzed them on D.H. Lawrence.
- There is no sex in the champagne room, but the
VIP Room might be a
Sexiest 100 list is experiencing a major surge from
Keira Knightley, who is now #3. Can you guess the top two
(gorgeous young stars) before surfing there?
Beavis has been found. Butthead still at large.
Third 'CSI' Takes Bite of Big Apple. Since CBS has
about one winning formula, they plan to fill their entire
line-up with it. Next up: CSI Moosejaw
- According to the internet rumor mill,
a prototype costume for Marvin the Paranoid Android
(Hitchhiker's Guide) has been accidentally made available on
'Amish In The City' Reality TV Series Planned: "
It's hard to believe the Amish would agree to being part of a
reality show. But, UPN is planning something they're
tentatively calling 'Amish in the City.' "
Charlie Sheen says he's having fun portraying a toned-down
version of his youthful self.
Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King has been nominated
for 12 awards at Britain's annual Baftas.
Review of the script for The Bourne Supremacy
Fuck the Nazis, says Churchill's parrot - still!.
The 104 year old piece of living, squawking history was at
Winnie's side throughout that dark era, and can still be
persuaded to mimic Churchill.
Does Red Bull make celebrities crazy?
Mouseketeer health riddle.
The Adventures of Kool-Aid Man!
Pirelli - The 2003 Calendar Photos
The 2004 Pirelli Calendar (You are looking for the
Fox president says that the traditional network "season" is
dead. They will be introducing new shows
strategically throughout the year. He went on to explain that
it doesn't really matter when you introduce shows if they all
An international cookbook compiled by California home
economics teachers includes a recipe for "Stuffed Camel."
Um-umm. It only takes 60 eggs and 26 pounds of rice to
stuff a camel. Oh, and an entire lamb and 110 gallons of
water. (Salt to taste - I prefer to add an amount of salt
equal to the size of Lot's entire wife. But that's just family
Kansas director overwhelmed by attention at Sundance festival:
" It was next to impossible Saturday to get a ticket to 'CSA:
The Confederate States of America,' but those who managed to
snare a seat for this year's 'buzz' film at the Sundance Film
Festival left with a lasting impression."
Sex life 'better in the countryside'. It is
possible, however, that this British survey is skewed by the
fact that Hugh Grant lives in the country.
Cheesus Industries - : "International distributor
of premium quality, religious-themed cheese sculptures"
archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
to submit a URL for inclusion in Other Crap
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
'Caps and comments by Crimson Ghost:
"Virgins of Sherwood Forest"
A little bit about the film...The DVD case plot blurb reads..."After a blow to the head, Nina (Gabriella Hall) is transported back in time to Sherwood Forest. Robin Hood and his Merry Men have gotten lazy, so it's up to Nina and a bunch of beautiful, young women to defeat the Sheriff of Nottingham's evil sister (Shannon Leigh)."
The Crimson Ghost's plot blurb...A B Movie bimbo in Robin Hood's Woods with plenty of toplessness and sport humpin'.
On a side note, one of the dudes that does the deed with Newman and Leigh is the winner of "Survivor Thailand." He is listed as Dave
Roth in the credits and plays Robin Hood. In real life his name is Brian Heidik.
- Amber Newman
- Gabriella Hall
- Shannon Leigh
- Susan Hale
||Topless in scenes from the very odd Ken Russell film, "The Lair of the White Worm" (1988).
|Helena Bonham Carter
||The UK actress and co-star of "Fight Club", "Planet of the Apes" and "Big Fish" topless in scenes from "Margaret's Museum" (1995).
||To many of us, she'll always be Lloyd Dobler's girlfriend from "Say Anything". Here she is topless and almost full frontal in scenes from "The Rachel Papers" (1989).
||Some very nice breast exposure in scenes from "A Woman, Her Men, and Her Futon" (1992).
||Brief breast and bum views in scenes from "Lipstick" (1976).
||Showing off some rear nudity in the early Governator movie, "Stay Hungry" (1976).
||The UK actress and author shows all 3 B's in scenes from the Robert Altman movie, "Images" (1972).
||Brief nipple and bare bum sightings in 1988's "The Boost".
|Topless in scenes from "Demon Slayer" (2003). This is the first of her only two IMDb credits, but she's kinda cute with small, but nice, natural breasts.
||Playing the demanding role of 'Nude Woman' in the 1988 movie "1969". You've probably never heard of this movie, but it does star three people you'll recognize, Robert Downey Jr., Kiefer Sutherland and Winona Ryder.
||The Adult star topless and doing some mild lesbo lovin in scenes from "Porno Valley", the 'reality' series that follows the lives of several Vivid Girls. 'Caps by Gman.
|Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
Pat's comments in yellow...
MICHAEL JACKSON NEWS ROUND-UP
Where's Judge Ito When You Need Him? - Friday at the Santa Barbara,
California, Courthouse, Michael Jackson pleaded not guilty to seven felony
counts of child molesting, after being reprimanded by the no-nonsense judge
for showing up 20 minutes late. He claimed he overslept.
He explained that he sleeps SO DEEPLY with a bedful of children.
He was actually late because he dropped his nose and it bounced behind
Who Kissed It And Made It Better? - The courthouse was surrounded by
frenzied Jackson fans who turned out to show support. After the
arraignment, he climbed up on top of his SUV, and as an aide held an
umbrella over him, he clapped, stomped his feet and blew kisses to the
Oops! That was the judge's SUV.
Children threw their Underoos at him.
The crowd was thrilled to see that the dislocated shoulder the cops gave
him was all better.
How About In EVERY Sense Of The Word? - Jackson attorney Mark Geragos told
ABC's "Good Morning America" that Michael is "not a freak in any sense of
the word," and he's inundated with letters from people every day "who think
he's the greatest thing since sliced bread."
Now, THOSE people are freaks!
He is like bread: cracked wheat...made with bleached flour.
He's like bread, but lawyers have all his dough.
He's just a normal, non-freakish man in his 40s who sleeps with
children, talks like a gay chipmunk, and dances on a car roof after he's
been charged with seven felonies.
He Spoons With Children - Jackson's pal, Israeli "psychic" spoonbender Uri
Geller, said he believes in his innocence because three years ago in a
recording studio, he put Michael under deep hypnosis and asked him about
it. Geller said Michael replied that he had never touched a child in a
sexual way, saying under hypnosis, "My relations with children are very
My relations with my wife are very beautiful, too.
We only know he never conceived a child in a sexual way.
He then told Michael that when he awoke, he would be Norma Desmond.
Maybe hanging around with Uri Geller is what made Michael so bent.
HARRISON FORD PAYS RECORD DIVORCE SETTLEMENT
Her Lawyer: Darth Vader - Harrison Ford is finally free to marry girlfriend
Calista Flockhart if he likes, but boy, did it cost him. Britain's The
Mail on Sunday newspaper reports that he will pay his ex-wife, screenwriter
Melissa Mathison, a record-breaking $90 million settlement. Ford, who had
no pre-nup, not only gave her half the millions he earned during their
marriage, he also agreed to give her a share of royalties from future sales
of DVDs and videos of the movies he made during their marriage, such as the
"Star Wars" and "Indiana Jones" series.
If he doesn't want her anymore, can I marry her?
At least with Calista, he won't have to spend any money on food.
If you're a woman over 40 in Hollywood, the only way to make the big
bucks is to get divorced.
His next movie will be called "Indiana Jones and the Lost Treasure."
NICK AND JESSICA DENY SEX-TAPE TALE
Unreality Show - Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey of MTV's reality show "The
Newlyweds" are furious at a porn website that claimed there is a camera in
their bedroom that activates when it detects motion, and it caught them
having sex. The site plans to sell the 45-minute tape. The couple says
there are no cameras in their bedroom, and their rep told In Style that the
tape is a hoax, the people in it aren't them, "and lawyers are getting
Who wants to see lawyers having sex?
If lawyers are involved, then rest assured SOMEBODY is
It can't be Jessica, because the girl in this tape can spell
"K-Y"...Also, she doesn't think K-Y Jelly is something you spread on a
It's got them too angry to have sex, so now they have to talk, and that
made Nick even angrier.
SIMON COWELL DISSES MADONNA
Why You Can't Be Over 24 - Simon Cowell was promoting "American Idol" to
the TV Critics Association in Los Angeles when he was asked about the
importance of a pop star's looks. After saying Britney Spears, J-Lo and
Beyonce were all good-looking, he added, "Madonna used to be good-looking."
Fellow "Idol" judges Paula Abdul and Randy Jackson groaned, and Cowell
shot back that "she's a housewife" now.
So's Jessica Simpson.
Looking like a housewife didn't hurt Clay Aiken.
When I get home, I'll check out the housewife I live with and see if she
looks like Madonna.
Simon won't be participating this season because Paula just killed him.