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Updates:
- Charlie's French Cinema Nudity site is updated
THIRD PARTY VIDEOS
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Catherine McCormack in The Tailor of Panama, I
thought she looked great in Braveheart and even better in Dangerous Beauty, but
she de-glammed after that. After her terrific performance in Dangerous Beauty,
matched by her stunning looks, it seemed that she might become an A-list movie
star, but her best work since then has been on stage. (Zipped
.avi)
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Rene Russo in The Thomas Crown Affair. (Zipped
.avi) Kind of similar to McCormack's situiation, in a way. It seemed
she was ready to become a major leading lady after Thomas Crown, but didn't. Of
course, she doesn't have McCormack's acting ability, and she got kind of a late
start (45 when she made Thomas Crown), but perhaps she contributed to her own
problems with some very weak career choices like The Adventures of Rocky and
Bullwinkle and Yours, Mine and Ours.
OTHER CRAP:
Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.
MOVIE REVIEWS:
Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.
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King David (1985)
King David (1985) has Richard Gere slaying, smiting and
begatting his way through four books of the bible. The filmmakers could have gone for epic battle scenes, or focused on
what a horn dog David was, but they opted instead for a remedial Sunday School
lesson. Considering that God wrote the source material, it must have been more
exciting than what finally hit the screen. In fact, it's just about at the
sleep-inducing level of those infamous Know Your Bible comic books, except
that Gere had less dynamic range than the typical comic book figure.
The esseence of the film is that whenever Gere's David gets
off course, some prophet or other shows up to kick his butt. I guess the theme
is that you shouldn't piss off God ...
... which might explain how the MPAA
assigned a PG-13 rating to a film with full frontal nudity from Alice Krige as
Bathsheba and breasts from Cherie Lunghi as Saul's daughter.
King David
was directed by Bruce Beresford, who has turned out several films I found
watchable, including Don't Party, Breaker Morant, Driving Miss Daisy, and
Starring Pancho Villa as Himself. Even his low-rated Puberty Blues had its
moments. I am not genetically predisposed to hate Richard Gere either, and
enjoyed An Officer and a Gentleman immensely. It is just this particular
Beresford/Gere effort I don't like.
As bad an idea as all this sounds, the film is not really
terrible. It's just not very good.
Terrible would have at least made it fun.
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No Mercy for the Rude
"Killer" grew up in an orphanage, teased incessantly because of a
speech impediment. The taunts that he had to endure as a child became
bad enough that he simply stopped talking altogether. The only good
memories he has of his childhood days, was of another orphan girl that
took care of him and treated him like a normal person. She pushed him
to stand up for himself and they soon became best of friends. As an
adult, Killer worked at a neighborhood restaurant making use of his
best talent: his mastery of the knife. While spending his days working
at the restaurant, he decided to see if he could get his speech
impediment fixed. The doctor that he saw told him that his tongue was
abnormally short and to fix his problem would require a specialist. He
told Killer that the price of the operation would cost $100,000. In
order to get the money for his surgery, Killer decides to make use of
his talent with the knife and become a killer for hire. His one rule
would be that he would kill only rude people.
"No Mercy for the Rude" is another great Korean Movie, like
many coming out these last few years. The actor that played Killer is
Ha-kyun Shin, who has played in some very impressive films like Save
The Green Planet, JSA, and Sympathy For Mr. Vengeance. He is
impressive here as well, he can create a great character without
saying a word. The movie is influence from by Chan-Wook Park's revenge
trilogy (Sympathy For Mr. Vengeance, Oldboy, Sympathy For Lady
Vengeance), but is not a copy of any of them, it also feels a lot like
Luc Besson's Leon. I really recommend the movie to any lovers of Asian
cinema, you will not be disappointed.
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Notes and collages
The Supernatural Ladies
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Kathryn Erbe
Stir of Echoes |
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...I like this ghost film but don't take my word for it since I despised
"Interview of a Vampire" which other people adored...
- (RokWatch)Scoop's note: I pretty much
agree with you on both counts. I think Stir of Echoes underperformed
financially because it came out at about the same time as the
mega-blockbuster The Sixth Sense, and is a very similar movie. Stir of Echoes came out while The Sixth Sense
was still in theaters, still riding near the top of the box office. Analysts wondered how
many "kid seeing dead people" movies could be supported simultaneously.
In the context of that time, it seemed that the kid in this movie was
putting up his hand in the back of the class and saying "What about me? I
see dead people too!" To make matters worse, Stir of Echoes came out the exact same week as
Stigmata - another significantly hyped story about supernatural events.
Therefore, in its the opening weekend, Stir of Echoes finished third behind
two very similar movies. A tough draw! In spite of that, the film eventually grossed a
respectable $21m, even though its distribution level was only moderate. I
liked the film, and most critics did as well. It scored 70% at Rotten
Tomatoes. Roger Ebert gave it the same three stars he gave to The Sixth
Sense, and James Berardinelli gave Stir of Echoes a far better review than
The Sixth Sense. Of course The Sixth Sense took in close to $300m, while Stir of Echoes
barely cleared $20m, so ... sometimes it's all about timing! You have to
wonder how it would have shaken out if their releases had been reversed.
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Dann reports on
Totally Awesome
This is
totally dumb, totally stupid, totally clichéd, and that's totally OK
because it's totally supposed to be.
It's also totally funny.
The premise
of the 2006 comedy is that VH1 found a "long-lost" unreleased teen film
from the eighties and is airing it now (in 2006). It's about a loser whose
family moves from Pittsburgh to California, and who is considered the most
uncool/unpopular kid in his new high school. Naturally, he immediately
falls for the most beautiful/popular girl in the school (Brittany
Daniel), who is dating the most handsome/popular guy in the school.
His sister is also distraught because she wants to be a dancer, but
dancing is outlawed in the town they moved to due to an unfortunate
incident years ago where all of the students' legs fell off during a dance
contest. Now, school dances are banned and instead they have
"stand-arounds."
Oh yeah, it's just as silly as that, and spoofs every 80's
movie you can think of. It has some hysterical moments, and the
stereotypes fly at you left and right. If you're in the mood for total
goofiness, this is the movie to pick. Also, let's have a big round of
applause for Zara Taylor, who, although she doesn't seem to land
big roles, has managed to show her boobs in every movie I've seen her in.
My kind of actress
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Zara Taylor |
Brittany Daniel |
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Mr Skin looked at Ingmar Bergman's
underrated masterpiece, Roller Booty, which was loosely adapted from
Strindberg's somber, cynical Expressionist play, The Dance of Death.
OK, so it wasn't a literal interpretation
First up, Zoe Britton |
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Roller Booty: Jennifer Lee
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Roller Booty: Samantha Ryan
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Roller Booty: Angie Savage
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Roller Booty: Cheleste Star
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enough of Roller Booty ... at least until Bergman delivers his
long-promised sequel. Hope he makes it before time catches up with
him. I really need to know if Candy and Big Boots can save their
innocent friends by winning the Roller Derby against Death. At the
end of Part One, Death seems to be having some trouble skating with
that long robe on, and I'm hoping he switches to short-shorts for
the sequel.
Today's last set exposes Brigitte Petronio
in The House at the End of the Park |
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Pat's comments in yellow
The Michigan Court of Appeals unanimously ruled that cheating on your spouse
can get you life in prison. It stemmed from a bizarre case in which
prosecutors convicted a man of trading prescription painkillers for sex by
citing an obscure law that defines criminal sexual conduct as occurring
whenever "sexual penetration occurs under circumstances involving the
commission of any other felony." Since adultery is still listed as a felony
under an old law that's never enforced, the judges said they had no choice but
to rule that cheating on your spouse is criminal sexual conduct that can land
you in jail for life.
* So I guess the Detroit Pistons won’t be winning any
NBA championships for a long time.
Miami Beach city commissioners upset residents with a proposed
amendment that would ban all large private parties at homes. It's designed to
crack down on the unscrupulous rental of houses for large paid events that
cause traffic and noise problems. But it would ban any private gathering in
which the guests contribute more than $100. That means if you have 15 guests
who each bring $7 worth of gifts, wine or food, your living room Super Bowl
bash, cocktail get-together or Christmas party would be an illegal commercial
event eligible for a fine of up to $15,000.
* With the Christmas gifts my family gives each
other, keeping it under $100 total would be no problem.
Kathleen Ensz, a retired French professor from the University of
Northern Colorado, is on trial for "use of a noxious substance" for allegedly
wrapping dog poop in a political mailer from Republican Rep. Marilyn Musgrave
and leaving it at Musgrave’s office. At her hearing, her attorney tried to
argue that dog feces is protected free speech under the First Amendment. As
precedent, she cited Thomas Jefferson's criticism of the British King, and
"South Park's" Mr. Hankey to show the acceptability of feces as a modern
method of expressing disdain.
* She obviously considers bull feces to be a
form of free speech.
* I think we all remember how Jefferson declared
America’s independence by leaving a flaming bag of dog poop on the doorstep of
Buckingham Palace, ringing the bell and running.
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