Garden Party


You know what we need much more of? No, not love, sweet love, but episodic ensemble dramas which feature loosely interconnected L.A. lives! Man, I just can't get enough of those. If I were supreme world dictator, I would mandate this format for all movies, even Spaghetti Westerns and those crazy musicals from India. Of course, if I were supreme dictator, the format would be much better since I would also require all the hot young actresses to be naked at all times.

In this particular case, the film focuses on the thousands and thousands of people who move their lives to to L.A. every year - because their sexual inclinations are too complicated for Iowa, or because they want to break into show biz, or perhaps just because Iowa sucks and L.A. sounds inviting, glamorous, and snow-free. Once they arrive, the transplants need to find jobs, places to stay, and friends they can trust. Those would not be easy hurdles to clear for mature adults, let alone for the naive youngsters that move there. Some end up in the L.A. gutters; others head back to Iowa with their tails between their legs; others settle into the same kinds of pedestrian lives they led in Des Moines; one in a few thousand manages to get a big break of some kind. On the other side of the spectrum are those who prey on the newbies, and those who simply rely on them to fill low-level McJobs.

The script of this film weaves together some characters from each of those categories in a series of vignettes. It was created by author/director Jason Freeland from some short stories he wrote about life in L.A. Based on the movie, I presume those stories had little to do with one another. That doesn't really matter, I suppose, but what does matter is that the story has no good laughs, no action, no dramatic tension, and no particular insights. Couple all of that with the shopworn Altmanesque framework, and performances so laid back they barely have a pulse, and you get a film that seems to go nowhere and accomplish nothing en route.

That Garden Party song not only lends its title to the film, but it seems to be sung about a bazillion times. There's also another Rick Nelson song on the soundtrack.  I like Rick. Heck, I can sing along with almost all of his songs and I never missed an episode of "Ozzie and Harriet" when I was a kid. But I'm not exactly in the hip young demographic that this film seems to have been intended for.

The tale of the tape is woeful:

  • Garden Party grossed $21,000 in 7 theaters.
  • Rotten Tomatoes reports that only 11% of the reviews were positive, including a perfect 0% from the major critics.

None of the film's many attractive female stars provide any nudity. The one nude scene, which is actually a pretty good one, is completely gratuitous, provided by a minor character who plays no part in any of the interweaving central threads of this random tapestry.

Here's Robin Sydney, who may not be important to the plot, but is attractive and has a killer bod.

Fiona Dourif appeared in sexy underwear.


  • * Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

  • * White asterisk: expanded format.

  • * Blue asterisk: not mine.

  • No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.









Bride of Re-Animator


1920x1080 film clips of Fabiana Udenio. (Aka Alotta Fagina. Did you know she turns 45 this year? Time sure does slip away.) Collages below.

1920x1080 film clips of Kathleen Kinmont. Collages below.







Splitting Heirs


The Time Machine goes back for a young Catherine Zeta-Jones.
No nudity, but who cares ... she is just so darn hot. Caps and a clip.









Killing for Love


Continuing with my assortment of film clips, mostly third party web finds.

This is the only one of Brandy Ledford.









Chained Heat


"Monique Gabrielle had one of the prettiest faces and finest bodies in the business, than she let her ass swell to double size and decided to add a pair of bolt-on hooters to even her body out. Sadly, many porno actresses do the same, but few fat actresses stay in the top studios and instead get relegated to the smaller studios with lesser production values."

Monique Gabrielle film clip. Monique was a "Pet" in 1982. That spurred a film career which included 20 credits in the 1982-85 era. This was one of the earliest.

Sample below:








Notes and collages


"Las Vegas"

Nikki Cox. Season one continued.

s1, e8

s1, e9









Quebec sex comedy having nothing to do with the 1970s stoner duo Cheech and Chong, but very funny in its very dark sort of way.

Anick Lemay: partial boob and buns

Fanny Mallette: sexy

Jessica Welch: bikini

Marie-Chantale Gaudet: cleavage

Caroline Aspirot: side boob

Catherine Servedio: buns

Vanessa Blouin: sexy

Various: boobs and buns


Le gout des jeunes filles


It's called "On the Verge of a Fever" in English, but the title really translates roughly to "The Taste of Young Women." Quebec movie about 1970s Haiti with many blaxpoitation elements even though it's a serious movie.

Maita Lavoie: topless

Koumba Ball: topless

Nehemie Dumay: topless



For Your Eyes Only


The DVD is missing a scene which was shown in Canadian theatres nearly 30 years ago. Bibi Dahl (Lynn-Holly Johnson)
tries to seduce James Bond (Roger Moore) by meeting him in a change room at the ice rink. She spreadeagles on the massage table, removes her panties from underneath her skirt, and then spreads her legs revealing her coochie to the master spy (but not to the camera). Since Bibi is a daughter of an associate, Bond refuses her advances.

Although Holly was in her 20s at the time her character is teen jailbait so maybe that was the reason it was removed.
Can anyone elaborate on this?

Lynn-Holly Johnson



North Sea Hijack


... aka "ffolkes".

Roger Moore film where he plays some sort of cat-loving poofter spy. When he takes off Lea Brodie's pants, instead of making wild love to her he just apologizes.

Lea Brodie: down to her panties.


Copper Mountain


Forgettable ski movie if it wasn't for a young Jim Carrey in an early role and Randi Brooks in a wet t-shirt.

Randi Brooks: hot tubbin'









This is the Madonna picture being offered at Christie's, this time in high definition

Alexandra Cohen-Speigler in New York Blood

Rakella Marie in New York Blood

A vintage Daryl Hannah see-through in tremendous quality.

A vintage (2001) Christina Ricci see-through in good quality.

Trina Dyrholm in Point of View

Trina Dyrholm from the special features on the Point of View DVD

Jaqui Holland in My Best Friend's Girl


Film Clips

Olivia Alaina May was the star of The 18-Year-Old Virgin, which we covered a couple of days ago. She also co-stars in Co-ed Confidential, a raunchy cable series. Here she is in some naughty action with Michelle Maylene, showing the ol' coochie. (Sample right)
Here are some of the other women from the same episode of Co-Ed Confidential: Tanya James, Kaylani Lei, Angela Davies and Hannah Harper, Aurora Snow and Phoenix Marie

The women of My Wife is an Actress: Charlotte Gainsbourg, Jo McInnes, and Lucy Harrison

Gretchen Mol in The Memory Keeper's Daughter. Her career never blossomed as it was expected to, but the camera absolutely adores her! (Sorry, no nudity except a topless shot from the rear.)

Oceane Mozas in Bella Ciao

Rosalinda Celentano in Paz