• * Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

  • * White asterisk: expanded format.

  • * Blue asterisk: not mine.

  • No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.

Ned Kelly


A very brief Australian Classic today, something I missed in the transit over the last 10 years.

Ned Kelly, another apocryphal treatment of that Australian outlaw from 2003, begins after Ned (Heath Ledger) is fitted up for a crime he probably didn't do. He is sent to jail for 2 years and comes back wanting the quiet life with his family. He starts up bare knuckle boxing and is quite good. Across the way, a rich family have moved in and he takes a shine to the woman of the house, Julia Cook (Naomi Watts), although she is married. But, the local cops want the Kelly gang gone and will do anything to get rid of them. A young constable wants Ned's sister Kate (Kerry Condon), but she doesn't want him and it is the catalyst for what is about to happen. The cops steal the Kelly family horses and lock them up. The Kelly gang get them back, but the young constable wants Kate and things come to a head while Ned is having it off Julia and the young constable is forced out of the house. He tells the other cops that Ned shot him and the shit hits the fan. The Kelly Gang, including his brother Dan, Steve Hart and Joe Byrne (Orlando Bloom) go on the run. The cops come and arrest his mother to force them back but this doesn't work and they go after the gang. When they catch up, there is a shoot-out where 3 cops are killed. They also start robbing banks. But, to the public, they are forced into this situation by the cops fitting them up and they are lauded in the eyes of the public, even though $20,000 has been put on their heads and the best cop in Victoria, Superintendent Francis Hare (Geoffrey Rush), is sent in to get them. And it's going to come to a head in Glenrowan. Yeah, I don't have much time for the Kelly legend, doesn't really interest me, but there is plenty to play with and possibly too much has over the years. This is a solid, but not really memorable version. Ledger leads the film extremely well and shows what was to come (and sadly cut short). But, the rest are there for name value only. Naomi Watts is barely in it and her character is such a wet blanket. Orlando Bloom barely registers even though he has a fairly big role, but then he rarely does. The final showdown is quite shocking and if it is how it happened, the police should be ashamed of themselves. Ah well...

I missed this film when it was released mainly because I didn't really want to watch it. But then I was rewatching the excellent miniseries Marking Time recently and there was Thea Gumbert and it got me thinking where did she go (well, after noticed she has rather big breasts...). And lo and behold, there she is in Ned Kelly briefly completely naked. And playing a 13 year-old girl. Um, yeah...

Thea Gumbert 1080hd film clip (low-res sample below)



Louise Bourgoin in Un heureux evenement (2011)

Bai Ling's world famous nipples in Bangkok Bound
(2010) in 720p

Tanya Clarke in Death Warrior (2009) in 1080p

Sima Fisher, Dawne Furey, and Emily MacLeod in Death Warrior (2009) in 1080p

Teresa Willis in Forgiving the Franklins (2007). Tuna reviewed this obscure film and loved it. (I haven't seen it myself.)

Lucia Jimenez in The Kovak Box (2006) in 720p. I reviewed this equally obscure film, and also loved it, although the ending kind of disappointed me. Go figure!

Jackie Quinones in Hard Luck (2006). A few years ago, this obscure woman in this obscure straight-to-DVD film somehow made it onto the annual list of best nude scenes. How could that be? Simple. Jackie has about the most perfect butt you've ever seen.

Eva Grimaldi in Jour Tranquille A Clichy (1990) 720p.  Part of this film clip is shaky. I don't know if it is a faulty clip or some kind of arty bullshit. Sorry. The stills came out great!

Jutta Speidel in Fleisch (1979)

Today's forgotten Italian classics:

Marcella Petrelli and an unknown in Penombra (1986)

Paola Senatore in Penombra (1986)

Paola Corazzi in Maladonna (1984)

Paola Senatore and Claudia Cavalcanti in Maladonna (1984)

Paola Senatore in Maladonna (1984)


Claudia Cavalcanti in Maladonna (1984)

Rosalba Neri and Barbara Bouchet in Alla ricerca del piacere (1972)

PICS/ Collages

Paz de la Huerta naked. Who could have dared to dream?

Leah Hibbert

Ghosthunter Susan Slaughter

Camila Velasco in Cold Sweat (2010)

Noelia Vergini in Cold Sweat (2010)

Angelina Jolie in Gia

Elizabeth Mitchell in Gia

Mitchell and Jolie together

Lake Bell in How to Make It in America