"A Sweet Sickness"

A Sweet Sickness (1965) is a roughie that was a pick-up for Friedman. Someone else made it but couldn't afford to release it, so Dave did. It is the story of starry eyed starlets who come to Hollywood to make it big, and what happens to them between casting couches and "modeling jobs and art films. The film stars Vincene Craddock, AKA Vincene Wallace, one of the more prolific actresses in this era. As the film opens, she is still rather innocent, and is not getting any work. Her girlfriend, VIcki Carbe caught on, and is friendly with casting directors, agents, and the like, and so is making plenty of money, albeit mostly on her back.

We see a plump unknown showing breasts trying to impress an agent, and another unknown who does a strip for the agent, and also shows panties. She leaves when he demands sex, and the agent offers the job to Craddock. Margeurite Zalud plays a stripper in the club that Craddock accepts the job in. Later, she is drugged and photographed in an orgy scene with Sharon Wells and Yuki Tani. Tai shows breasts, and Wells shows everything, as do Carbe and Craddock.

There are no reviews of this film that I could find. It is pretty much non-stop nudity and simulated sex. The plot, I suspect, was only there to provide redeeming social merit. I liked it more than the usual roughie, as there was less physical violence against the women, and was more their sexual exploitation by tinsel town. The transfer was pristine, except that the entire film uniformly lacked contrast. As a roughie, this is a solid C.

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  • Marguerite Zalud (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22)

  • Sharon Wells (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25)

  • Unknown #1 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16)

  • Unknown #2 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32)

  • Vicki Corbe (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39)

  • Vincene Craddock (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52)

  • Yuki Tani (1, 2, 3)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Blue Hill Avenue (2001):

    This is an ambitious attempt to create an African-American version of Once Upon a Time in America.

    Four youngsters are shown growing up in south Boston, and eventually slipping into drug dealing, ultimately going head-to-head with the usual black crime boss (Clarence Williams III, the guy from the original Mod Squad!) and the mandatory corrupt white cops (including Wishmaster!). As adults, they are sharply dressed at all times, suave with the babes, and inherently honorable despite their choice of professions. In other words, they are highly romanticized gangsters, like the ones in the old-time movies.

    As befits its innately romantic world view, it is quite an elegantly filmed movie, and the four main actors did a good job. In fact, it includes some fairly interesting characters among the four boys who grew up on the streets together, and some sexy nudity from the women. It has some very good elements, but when push came to shove, distributors just felt that the film was too derivative and that its weltanschauung was too old-fashioned. Therefore, the general conclusion among potential distributors was that the potential audience was too small for the expense of theatrical promotion and distribution. The film languished in limbo for a couple of years, then went straight to DVD.

    Despite those liabilities, it's a pretty good watch. I watched it, got absorbed, liked it, even went back to listen to some of the commentary. The film's weaknesses did not prevent me from enjoying a generally well crafted film. There were only two things that kept me from really liking it a lot:

    1. The film has no humor and shows no light sides of the personalities of the main characters. It just takes itself very seriously throughout, and that makes it all seem to lack depth and appear one-dimensional. But I liked that dimension, even if it was based on the whole romantic "noble gangster" myth.

    2. Some of the locations look really summery and nothing like Boston. The IMDb says it was filmed in Boston and New Brunswick, but I think some of it must have been filmed in L.A.

    There's a lot of talent behind this film, and you can expect these filmmakers to move farther through the distribution channel with their future efforts. This director and his cinematographer have talent, and have good films in them if they find the right script.

    Excellent DVD transfer. Solid C for the movie.

    • Latamra Smith (1, 2, 3)
    • Wanda Arab (1, 2)



    Lucky (2002):

    This is one weird-ass independent no-budget movie.

    On the surface, it seems to be about this: a cartoon writer with writers' block is degenerating into an alcoholic. One night, on a beer run, he runs over a dog. Since he is a lonely man, is perpetually drunk, and is riddled with guilt, he brings the dog home, hoping to nurse him to health. The dog is dead, but that doesn't stop the guy from keeping him around as a pet for a few weeks.

    Finally, he decides to bury the dog, but it comes back from the dead, and starts to haunt him, gradually controlling him completely, dictating his every thought. The dog is a bloodthirsty little fella, and has soon turned the writer into a serial torturer and murderer. That's the bad news. The good news is that the dog is a much better writer than the writer ever was, so his writers' block is soon cured, and the quality of his work takes a quantum leap upward.

    Of course, as you may have guessed, the film may not really be about this. It may just be about a lonely, failed, insane writer who imagined all the events in the film, or it may include some real events embellished by his insane imagination. Frankly, I'm not sure what happened and what didn't. Some things were obviously imaginary, others not.

    It's actually a fairly good movie. The lead actor, who is on screen virtually every minute, is quite competent, kind of a cross between Kevin Spacey and ol' Tony Soprano in the general category of soft-looking guys who may be gentle, or may snap into violence, or who may just be completely loony. The writer is Stephen Sustaric, who has worked on some of the best comedy shows of the past 30 years, including cartoons. (Yipes! Is it autobiographical? Does he also have bodies buried in his back yard? Does he want to?).

    Although production values are not lush, one good writer and one good actor in a virtual soliloquy can produce a strangely engaging film, and this one has a really black sense of humor. I laughed out loud at some of the discussions between the writer and his (presumably imaginary) torture victims, and at the absurdity of some of the women he dated before he simply decided to get into that whole kidnap and torture thing.

    Another solid C, at least for you guys who like something far from the beaten path. Unfortunately, the DVD quality is shit.



    Stark Raving Mad (2002):

    This was intended as a starring action vehicle for Stifler, and the production budget was a respectable five million dollars. The filmmaker got good value for that money in terms of production values, but the film was never released in America. It did get a limited release in the UK, where the British critics eviscerated it.

    It's a hipper-than-thou film about a guy who uses the noise from his after hours club to cover up a slick heist - a robbery of the bank next door. Unfortunately, everything that can go wrong for him does. His gang is filled with wackos, and the club is filled with people and events which keep distracting him from the job: several competing groups of gangsters, suspicious FBI guys, the owner of the club, power failures, and so forth.

    As I said, it's too hip for its own good, but it isn't that bad a film. It is quite slickly edited, and has some offbeat characters and humorous stylized violence. It will remind you a lot of Guy Richie's films. The good ones, not Swept Away. Yes it is predictable, and yes it is derivative of Richie and Tarantino, but it is completely competent - even kind of slick in some ways - and it should entertain you if you like that kind of film, assuming you have a strong tolerance for fancy quick-cut editing, lighting gimmicks, and loud punk music.

    A C-. I would have called it a C, but as per our policy, I have to reduce any film by a half grade if Richie Valens is in the cast and does not sing La Bamba.

    • Money Mazur. Not nude, but she showed 90% of her butt.



    Raw Adventures - (written by Crimson Ghost)

    Little background for you on "Raw Adventures" (since IMDb and Junior don't know what it is):

    Produced by Player Entertainment in 1999.   Directed by Gary Orona.   Many  of the  executive producers and producers names also appear in the credits of "The Great Bikini Off-Road Adventure." The video opens with the following quote from Gary Orona: "This feature was shot in extreme wilderness settings with the intent to film the female form, nude, against natural backdrops.  This arrangement of  form, location, design and music becomes an erotic vignette..."

    The DVD appears to be a compilation of outtakes, behind the scenes footage and scenes shot just for this production.  I recognized some of the "Great Bikini Off-Road Adventure" footage.

    The makers of "Raw Adventures" had some difficulties with names.  The credits list 11 young ladies as the models for the production.  They are:

    • Lauren Hays (also listed as a producer)

    • Joy Deane

    • Teri Marcelle

    • Lisa Bouy'e

    • Angela Barioche

    • Bridgette Thomas

    • Christa Campbell

    • Rachel Dane

    • Cari Thompson

    • Mel Greene

    • Tara Marie


    The DVD cover lists the following stars :

    • Malasia Williams

    • Tara Deane

    • Melinda Armstrong

    • Terri Marcelle

    • Rachel Dane

    Only one of the names appears on both lists, although Teri Marcelle and Terri Marcelle could be a simple spelling miscue.   And Tara Deane/Joy Deane could be the same person.


    I recognize Lauren Hays in the film.  I also recognize Avalon Anders, and she is referred to by name in one of the vignettes.   The actress listed as Laura Hudspeth in "The Great Bikini Off-Road Adventure" also appears in a  vignette but is not identified by name.   Avalon Anders and Laura Hudspeth are not listed in the credits or on the cover under those names.  Melinda Armstrong does appear in a scene.  I recognize her from the movie "Bikini Summer 2."  She is listed on the DVD cover, but not in the credits.  Christa Campbell appears in a couple of the vignettes.

    You know, I could go on and on and on about the names in this feature, but thinking this much about it is:

    a. more thought than the producers put into getting them right,
    b. giving me a headache.

    In short, somebody paid Gary Orona to go camping and shoot film of good looking chicks getting naked and wandering around, and I guess he forgot to get their names.

    And the music is quite bad.

    More images from "Raw Adventures" will be coming soon, as soon as I can sort out which blond with implants is which.

    Coming Soon-- the sequel, "Raw Adventures at Bikini Point."


    Movies from Shiloh:

    Note: these movies were not created by Shiloh, or by me. They are from his collection. Obviously, he only sends in ones that work, and I only post them if they work for me. If they do not work for you. however, we can't help you because we don't know the original codec. You have to figure it out, hit or miss. (The latest DivX is usually a good guess). It's a bonus if the original sources work.


    I made .wmv versions of each -  I do know the codec for these - Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9. The upside of these is that you know the codec, and they'll play in the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly larger, and slightly lower quality.

    Today's roster of classics:

    Today's roster of new stuff:

    • Justine Bateman whips 'em out on Out of Order (.avi version, .wmv version). No sound. In slow motion. Voted by you as one of the Top 10 nude scenes of the year.

    • Naomi Watts seeks the Oscar for Best Nipples in 21 Grams.(You chose this as one of the ten best nude scenes of  2003. (.avi version, .wmv version).

    • Christina Ricci whips out her jubblies and a hint of more in Prozac Nation. You chose this as the best nude scene of 2003. (.avi version, .wmv version).




    Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the ones above, since it's sorta in real time.

    Click here to submit a URL for inclusion in Other Crap




    Here are the latest movie reviews available at

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Graphic Response
    • Greta Scacchi, toplessness and rear views in scenes from "Heat and Dust" (1983). The cloudy appearance is due to the scene being filmed through a lace curtain giving.

    Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website.

    'Caps and comments by Spaz:

    "Girltalk" (1987) aka "Girl Talk"

    A documentary made by Kate Davis following the lives of three runaway girls. The second only known as Mars now works as a stripper and shows breasts and full dorsal nudity.

    Halle Berry
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    A new Vejiita comic featuring the Oscar winner baring her breasts in "Swordfish" and "Monster's Ball".

    Scarlett Johansson No nudity, but the young actress is looking pretty good in scenes from "Lost in Translation" (2003).

    Kitana Baker

    The Miller Lite cat fight babe shows off robo-hooters and pubes in scenes from "Backyard Wrestling".

    Carmen Electra
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

    DeadLamb collages of Carmen from her "Aerobic Striptease" video. A little cleavage, the occasional pokie, and plenty if tight work out clothes.

    Pam Grier
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    A few more 'caps by Crimson Ghost featuring the queen of 70's blacksploitation showing off her big'uns and bum in scenes from "Coffy" (1973).

    Tonie Perensky
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)

    Playing the teacher that works as a stripper at night in scenes from "Varsity Blues" (1999).

    Debi Sue Voorhees Kitt 'caps of her amazing toplessness in scenes from "Friday the 13th: A New Beginning" (1985). Without a doubt, this is the best part of the movie.

    Katharine Isabelle
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    Probably a body double since you don't see her face, but still...that's an impressive chest. Señor Skin 'caps from "Freddy Vs. Jason".

    Pat Reeder
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    Funnier Than "The Abu Dhabi Honeymooners" - Former Iraqi Information Minister Saeed al-Sahhaf, nicknamed "Baghdad Bob" and "Comical Ali," has a new job. Saddam's spin doctor has been hired as a commentator by Abu Dhabi TV. In his latest appearance, he called for Saddam to get a fair trial, saying, "Everybody talks about war crimes and the like, but the court considers facts and evidence only."

  • "...And there is NO evidence of war crimes whatsoever!"
  • "...Besides, the point is moot because Saddam will never be captured."
  • I say it's no more than two weeks before CNN hires him.

    Hey! Cockatoos Are Pretty! - Tuesday, snide designer Mr. Blackwell released his list of the Worst Dressed Women of 2003. Counting down from #10, they are Lara Flynn Boyle (for her tutu dress), Courtney Love, Melanie Griffith ("a Botoxed cockatoo in a painting by Dali"), Missy Elliot, Celine Dion ("Abe Lincoln in drag"), Jessica Simpson, Diane Keaton ("Queen Victoria on jury duty: dowdy, dumpy and frumpy!"), and Shania Twain ("country-fried kitsch"). #2 was a tie between Britney Spears and Madonna ("The kissing cousins of couture crime"). Topping the list: Paris Hilton, whom he called "the Vapid Venus of Beverly Hills."

  • Mr. Blackwell is the only man who actually looks at Paris Hilton when she has clothes on.
  • I'm not surprised to hear that Paris Hilton was on top.
  • On the bright side, if Paris gets any skinnier, she'll just disappear.
  • Christina Aguilera is furious! First, nobody notices that she kissed Madonna, too, and now Mr. Blackwell doesn't even notice that she was dressed FAR skankier than Britney!
  • If Melanie Griffith was upset, her face didn't show it.
  • Missy Elliot?! L'il Kim demands a recount!

    But Dress Socks Are Painful With Wooden Shoes! - The Netherlands are very liberal about drugs and sex, but they have to draw the line somewhere, so the Dutch Finance Ministry has declared white socks to be indecent. An official confirmed that employees have been told to wear dark blue or gray suits "to convey reliability and professionalism" and that white sports socks "transgress the limits of decent dress behavior."

  • Unless that's all you're wearing, then they're okay.
  • Whoever wrote this policy was probably on drugs.
  • If you wear them with sandals, there's a lengthy prison term.
  • This is Europe: you should wear NO socks with a suit.

    Rub Your Meat With Juan Valdez - Rippe's restaurant in Seattle has found a new way for Seattle residents to ingest coffee: in steak. A few weeks ago, they debuted a $29 coffee-flavored steak that's rubbed with coffee grounds before grilling. It's so popular that despite the mad cow scare in Washington state, it immediately outsold everything else on the menu and is now a runaway hit.

  • People eat it, then run around the block three times.
  • Plus, it's great for breakfast!
  • Maybe the cows in Washington aren't really mad, they're just hopped up on caffeine.
  • If you want to spend $29 to taste some coffee, go to Starbucks.

    Cat Scratch Fever - Gonzo rocker Ted Nugent was injured on the Texas set of his VH1 reality show, "Surviving Nugent," when a chainsaw slipped and cut through his leg. It took 40 stitches to close the wound. Nugent didn't miss any time on the series: he immediately returned to work with a brace on his leg.

  • Hell, he put the 40 stitches in himself.
  • He then blew the chainsaw to bits with a Howitzer.
  • It cut off a big piece of his flesh, which was eaten by a deer just for spite.