 |
|
|
|
Notes:
- Hey, everyone. I am back at my desk. Thanks to Scoopy Junior for
filling in. I'm behind now, but I'll be back with original material
tomorrow.
- This from the Upcoming Nude Scenes blog: "Last week, I posted a image and
clip of that was supposedly was of Julian Berlin. Her publicist has e-mailed
me that the clip was not of Ms. Berlin"
UPDATES:
THIRD PARTY VIDEOS
OTHER CRAP:
Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.
MOVIE REVIEWS:
Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.
|
|
|
|
 |
|
|
Red Heat (1985)
Red Heat: Unschuld in Ketten (1985), which means Red Heat: Innocent in
Chains, is a German WIP film with a cold war twist. They got it right in the
mandatory shower scene, but didn't have the requisite torture or girl/girl
action, and the cat fights showed no skin. The biggest problem, however, was
in the casting, with Linda Blair as the wrongfully imprisoned, and Sylvia
Kristel as the top inmate and villain. Blair shot her acting wad along with
the pea soup in The Exorcist, and this is a dismal effort.
Blair flies from college to Germany to marry her soldier boyfriend. She
argues about his decision to reenlist, and takes a midnight stroll outside the
hotel where she happens upon the kidnapping of a defector. She is taken along
by the kidnappers, tortured with sleep deprivation until she confesses to
being a CIA operative, and is sentenced. Her boyfriend tries to find out what
happened to her, but the official position is that nothing happened to anybody
ever anywhere at any time, so he sets out to discover her whereabouts and free
her.
Meanwhile, she doesn't much like the East German prison, and her life is
made harder by the fact that the real spy still has secrets, and they try to
coerce Blair into befriending the spy and getting the information.
Blair shows a breast in a very short dark love scene, and shows both
breasts in a long and well lit shower scene. Sylvia Kristel also shows breasts
in the shower scene, and several other women show everything.
IMDb readers say 4.3. I would have to agree with a low score. The film is
short on what we watch WIP films for, features two terrible performances from
Kristel and Blar, and, in the action escape climax, everything is too dark to
see what is happening. This DVD is only available on Region 2 PAL, but the
English language dub is first-rate.
D+.
Scoop's note: Actually, the film does have a
girl-on-girl sex scene - between Linda Blair and Sylvia Kristel, in
which Blair is essentially raped by Kristel. Unfortunately, this Region 2 DVD
is a censored version of the film. It comes boxed with Chained Heat - and that
film has also been censored. The two censored scenes are two of the most
famous sex scenes in the history of grade-B cinema. One is the Kristel/Blair
girl-on-girl scene from Red Heat, the other one features poor, ever-victimized
Blair again being raped, this time by Dean Wormer, in Chained Heat.
Here is the Red Heat scene which has been trimmed from the Region 2 DVD (RDO's
caps are from a VHS tape)
|
 |
|
Linda Blair and Sylvia Kristel |
Of course, Red Heat is still a poor movie even with the censored scene.
Sylvia Kristel not only turned in a poor performance, but was ridiculously out
of shape. Check her out in Tuna's final collage, where there was a one or two
frame lapse in the plan to hide her flabby gut by placing other bodies between
her and the camera.
It's a bad movie, and takes itself far too seriously, but it's not quite as
bad as the version Tuna saw. I think it is probably still a D+ even with the
censored scene, but you might fairly argue for a C- for the full-length
version, based upon a must-see sex scene between screen legends.
(Chained Heat, on the other hand, did not take itself seriously and is
actually an exploitation classic, so in that case the censorship kept us from
seeing it in all its glory!)
|
|
|
 |
|
|
Today Mary Carey and Kayleen are getting it on in today's episode of "Sexy
Movie".
Caps and 2 zipped .wmv clips.
   
Is it over? Noooooooooooo , not by a long shot.
|
|
|
|
 |
|
Dann reports on Mad Cowgirl:
I really enjoyed Fiona Horsey in Twisted Sisters (where
she played both sisters), so I jumped at this 2003 horror film when it was
recently released on DVD. It is certainly one of the more unique horror
films I've seen, at least in the method of killing. Death by Vagina. Yeah,
sounds silly, but in the context of the movie, it made sense in a twisted
way.
A young woman, Helen (Fiona Horsey), is having intimacy problems
with men, mainly because of a trauma she suffered as a little girl, but
which she can't quite remember. When she is brutally raped by her
boyfriend, the rape ends when her vagina literally sucks him inside and
eats him, leaving only his clothes.
Unable to even believe what seems to have happened, she goes to a
doctor. He tells her he must examine her, but he gives her a drug "to
relax" which causes her to pass out. When she wakes, she finds a condom
sticking out of her vagina, and the doctor's clothes, but no doctor.
Now the vagina starts talking to her, demanding "feed me". To do this,
she moves to London and becomes a hooker, choosing for customers only
scumbags that she'd just as soon see dead. Her vagina obliges.
Meanwhile, she is being hunted by longtime friend Dennis who has always
secretly loved her. He has come to London to find her, but instead meets
conjoined twins (played by real-life but not conjoined twins Amy and
Beth Steel). Dennis falls for the shy and sweet twin, but during a
love making session, he becomes infuriated by the other twin, a
big-mouthed slutty type, and accidentally kills her.
Now on the run for killing one of the twins, things get even more
complicated when Dennis is spotted by a stripper who recognizes him, and
forces him to help her rob a bank. Trying to escape after having to kill a
bank guard, Dennis and the stripper commandeer an RV with a newlywed
couple, which happens to be Helen and her new husband.
All this climaxes in a very cool ending, but it's getting there that
makes this flick so good. Twisty and complex, even though very
far-fetched, this flick is a lot of fun in a weird and demented way. I
liked it.
 |
 |
 |
|
Fiona Horsey |
Amy and Beth Steel |
Jaye Macaulay |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
